"Sasha if you try taking her food again she will cut you." Eren laughed as Sasha jumped her hand back as you glanced up at her before nodding at Eren in both agreement and thanks.
"You wouldn't do that...right?" Armin laughed but you remain silent continuing to eat as you took in the conversations around you. It had been two weeks since Eren had first dragged you to the table and now it had become a daily habit.

You eventually got used to the loudness and bright life within each Cadet that surrounded you everyday, almost enjoying the company; Eren had even caused you to spend the experiments with him and the Special Operations unit, dragging you along not taking no for an answer till you eventually gave in. Sitting between him and Levi you had grown to the point where you almost... missed their company on a daily basis, you were getting pulled in to far.
"(Name)?" Christa's gentle voice caused your (e/c) eyes to look up from the thought as she smiled at you, seeming to notice the worried look in your eyes as you nodded at her.
"I was just saying to Reiner how we all practically know that song you hum now off by heart." Eren gleamed at you causing your head to shoot towards him, holding back the wide eyes.

"What do you mean?" You held back in the flinch of his words as his smile wavered.
"You hum it so much we all pretty much know it." Eren smiled more gently with those bright turquoise eyes.
"Its is a very beautiful song." Armin breathed next to you as his voice emitted a hum, the familiar notes hitting your heart as your legs shot up causing you to push away the table slightly.
"That is not a song for you to sing lightly, please don't." You breathed, their eyes on you with confusion.
"But you..." Eren began, his hand reaching up to you as if going to pull you back down; pull you down into the memories of death.
"It is a song of farewells and death, please just... don't." You started, your voice growing softer as the words fell from your lips, pushing away the emotions piling up in you. You turned, pushing away Eren's gentle hand that had come to rest on your arm, speedily heading from the corridor and exit; Levi glanced at you with worry as he stood to intercept you on your way out.

"(Name)" He called as you rushed towards the corridor, his hand reaching out to grab your wrist but you slapped it away.
"Don't." You simply replied in an overly cold manner, turning from the surprised looking Corporal who's silvery eyes were softened at the emotion finally breaking onto your features. You had fallen in too far with these humans, you had let yourself get soft again; you had been pulled back into those feelings you had killed off with each splatter of the blood of your past comrades.
I am not human, I do not feel. you repeated to yourself over and over again.

-Eren POV-

He watched you storm away, his mouth slightly parted at the sudden outburst as his fist clenched with worry. Levi's sharp gaze turning to him as the Corporal practically stormed over to the Cadets table; hands slamming down on the table causing everyone to jump.
"What happened." He growled, Eren watching the anger on the Corporal's face gaining a final glance of your (h/c) hair flowing as you faded into the corridor.
"Brats, what did you say to her?" Levi breathed, his silver eyes holding that dangerous glint that caused Eren to flinch as Jean finally managed to speak up.

"W-we were talking about that song she always hums and she suddenly ran off saying we should not take it lightly." Jeans ridged figure informed Levi as he turned away with a sigh, taking a few steps towards the corridor.
"I don't see why she is so special, we have all lost people." Jean muttered under his breath causing a flare of anger to surge through Eren his eyes glancing over the bandages you had wrapped around his hands; they had healed by now but he still wore one as a reminder of your words.

"Say that again Brat." Levi's voice hummed in a low register, his face next to Jean's in seconds, reacting before Eren had got the chance to pummel the horse-faced Cadet himself.
"(Name) knows more about the world, life, death and freedom than any of you. She was the only one here born free outside of the wall and that came with a price. So if she tells you something, there is a damn good reason." Levi growled, his eyes glancing over Eren in a warning; his words explaining many of the strange things you had said to the titan shifter. The corporal straightened, turning away as Jean's ghost pale face had sweat drops of fear running down it.

"Are you going after her?" Eren called, standing from the table as Levi clicked his tongue sending a shiver of fear through Eren after the earlier display.
"If she wanted to talk to someone... she would have." He sighed, clenching his fist that you had slapped away slightly before walking back to the squad leaders table with a sour look on his face. Eren lowered himself back to the table; flashes of your (e/c) eyes and soft (h/c) hair running through his mind.

He had been interested in you since before that day in the sparring arena, only using irritation as an excuse to test your unseen skill. You had always been distant, (e/c) eyes gazing off into some unforeseen future as you hummed to yourself, always alone aside from when Eren had seen you by Levi's side. Pushing away those around you as if you did not want to get too close, as if you were scared for them and yet no emotion of the sort played across your features when he had seen you.

You had been calling them all "human" less, speaking to them by name instead. He had thoughts he knew you, was getting closer to you; he wanted to, especially after the day of the experiment, your words resonating through him and driving him on. The understanding behind your voice as you said the words now made clear by knowing you were not of this world, you were from outside; somehow having surviving a freedom tainted by Titans and no doubt blood. That is why all killing is that same to her, be it human or titan; survival is all that mattered

Eren stood, ignoring the mummers around him speculating how you had lived outside of the wall Mikasa and Armin's worried gaze on their friend as he walked out of the mess hall ignoring the warning glares from Levi. Heading to find you and save you from whatever darkness lurked in your heart of your past. A darkness he had known the day the Titans tore away his home and his mother...

- Levi POV-

"Aren't you going to follow her?" Hanji's voice hummed in his ear as he stabbed at his food violently glaring at Eren as he left to follow you before turning his icy stare to Hanji.
"If she wanted to talk she has had five years, I don't see why now that Jaeger brat has caused all of this." He muttered, unable to control his sour tongue causing Hanji to laugh in surprise shifting her glasses.
"I don't think he is the only one who has had an affect on her, trust me. Go." She whispered to him causing him to raise an eyebrow as he furrowed his brow.
"What are you on about." He sighed, his hand hurting from your slap but he knew it was more of a psychological hurt then anything else.

"You have seen that look when she falls into her thoughts, her past obviously eating away at her. Only you have ever been able to pull her out of that; and that was since the first day we met her." Hanji murmured through a mouthful watching as Levi stood muttering to himself about how much trouble you had caused his life before finally setting off for the corridor and eventually you.

-Reader POV-

You sat leaned against a tree, your knees pulled up into your chest with your head buried into them; your arms wrapped around your slim legs as you curled into yourself; You had gotten to attached, you had fallen to far.
I'm not one of them. I'm not one of them. you thought to yourself, flashes of the past five year; Levi, Eren, all those who had come and gone and most recently the brightness of the lives of those surrounding you. Feeling as if you had been dragged into the centre of those you had promised not to get attached to.

"I'm sorry." You whispered, your voice cracking as you thought of your family; your past friends and travel companions; the sights you had seen with so many people blinding you till that world was eventually drowned in crimson. The crimson of their deaths.
"I'm sorry you faded away without me." You sobbed slightly, trying to pull up that cold cloak of ice around your heart but failing; clenching your fists to the point your nails dug into your skin causing your hands to bleed.
Fade away, your already faded away so leave me please You begged the smiling memories of your mind, words floating up to you from the darkness.

"(Name) whenever you are lost or lose someone and feel as if you are going to break, remember this. For our freedom remember this." Your mothers soft voice called as you started to hum the tune that had kept you sane all this time. The notes not enough to push away the faces of those long gone. Your pushed your hair away, leaning your head back against the bark taking a breath as you sung out the words you had long carved into you, the words of death and goodbye; (a/n yes this song is from LOTR but its beautiful)

'Home is behind, the world ahead,
and there are many paths to tread,
through shadow, to the edge of night,
until the stars are all alight,
mist and shadow, cloud and shade,
all shall fade,
all shall fade...'

The words left your lips as you felt heat running down your cheeks, despite the faces of those long dead having faded from your mind their presence was still there; weighing down your soul forevermore. Your ears pricked at the sound of crunching leaves, a boot appearing from behind the tree as your body jumped at the presence; your hands quickly pushing away the unattended tear on your cheek.
I'm not one of them you reminded to yourself as you heard a familiar voice call your name gently.