The Mastresses would like to welcome you to the next chapter of Who's Harry Potter. They would like to thank all of the readers and especially their faithful reviewers. Keep reading and keep reviewing!
Recap:
The friends continued reading to the end of the chapter which just talked about how, even though Harry had no one but the Dursleys, people seemed to know him. Odd people.
Chapter 3: The Letters from No One (Sirius)
As soon as James finished reading, Sirius snatched the book out of his hands. Lily and Remus looked at him oddly because Sirius, for once, actually seemed excited about reading a book.
"What?" Sirius asked indignantly.
"You want to read a book… that's not about Quidditch… willingly?" Remus asked.
"This is about my Godson, of course I do. Plus, I want to see if I'm mentioned again."
"You're such an arrogant toe rag." Lily said shaking her head.
"You've just now realized this?" James laughed.
"Just read. Wait… can you even read Sirius?"
"Lily, despite what you may think I'm not a complete idiot. I'm actually pretty intelligent. I just choose not to show it." Sirius explained very seriously.
"You never cease to amaze me Padfoot." Remus said with a grin. Even he had a hard time remembering that is friend is actually more intelligent than he gives him credit for. But who can blame him with the way Sirius acts most of the time.
Sirius then gave his best McGonagall impression. Looking as serious as he could, he opened the book to chapter three, cleared his throat, looked at his friends and said "Okay then." His friends burst out laughing. Just when he proved himself, he purposely ruined it.
"Sounds like you guys are having fun in here." Mrs. Potter said, entering the library. Sirius immediately put the book behind his back.
"Sirius Black, are you reading?"
"Maayyyybbbbeeeee."
"I want my Sirius back so whoever you are you can get out of my house." Mrs. Potter joked with her "son."
"You so like him better than me." James said.
"That's not true. I love you both equally."
"I'm your biological son! Shouldn't that count for something?!"
Everyone, but James, laughed. James was obviously taking this very personally.
"You'll always be my baby Jamsie-poo." Mrs. Potter said kissing her son's forehead.
"Mooooommmmmm!" James whined, highly embarrassed that his mom would kiss him in fount of Lily. This made everyone laugh even more at James' expense.
"Well," Mrs. Potter said once she calmed down a little, "I just came up to tell you four that dinner's on the table."
"FOOD!"
Sirius was already out the door and down the steps before anyone had a chance to blink. Mrs. Potter smiled and shook her head while following him down to the dining room. Lily hid the book in the couch so no one else would find it, then she, James and Remus made their way downstairs.
At the dinner table, dinner was anything but civilized. The four friends were practically inhaling their food in order to get back up to the library and read. Even Lily. Mr. and Mrs. Potter looked at each other in befuddlement. Why were their son and his friends acting so strange? Both wanted to say something but decided against it.
In no time at all, the Marauders and Lily had finished everything that was on their plates.
"We're done!" said James.
"Thank you very much, everything was wonderful." Lily said quickly.
Remus nodded his head in a small gratitude as he excused himself from the table right behind Lily and James. Sirius gave Mrs. Potter a quick thank you and rushed out. Mr. and Mrs. Potter stared at each other for a moment. Things were definitely unusual today in the Potter house. Before they had a moment to say anything Sirius rushed back in, grabbing some food off the table for later, smiled, thanked them, and then jetted back off to the library.
Once all the friends were back in the library, Lily pulled the book out from its hiding place in the couch and handed it off to Sirius. Everyone sat down and Sirius began to read.
The escape of the Brazilian boa constrictor earned Harry his longest-ever punishment. By the time he was allowed out of his cupboard again, the summer holiday had started and Dudley had already broken his new video camera, crashed his remote control airplane, and, first time out on his racing bike, knocked down old Mrs. Figg as she crossed Privet Drive on her crutches.
"We should set that kid loose in the Slytherin common room." Sirius said, getting his friends to chuckle a little before he continued.
Harry was glad school was over, but there was no escaping Dudley's gang, who visited the house every day. Piers, Dennis, Malcolm, and Gordon were all big and stupid, but Dudley was the biggest and stupidest of the lot, he was the leader. The rest of them were all quite happy to join in Dudley's favorite sport, Harry Hunting.
"Sounds so original." Sirius said interrupting himself again.
This was why Harry spent as much time as possible out of the house, wandering around and thinking about the end of the holidays, where he could see a tiny ray of hope. When September came he would be going off to secondary school and, for the first time in his life, he wouldn't be with Dudley. Dudley had been accepted at Vernon's old private school, Smentings.
"Vernon!" Lily exclaimed.
"Told you so." James and Sirius sang smiling.
"Lily, weren't you paying attention during the last chapter? That's when they established that his name was, in fact Vernon." Remus pointed out.
"I was… I guess the name just didn't register until now." Lily said.
"So know you can't possibly deny that this isn't a book of fate right? I mean that is the name of your sister's boyfriend." James said
"It's just a coincidence."
"Right," the boys said sarcastically.
Smelting boys wore maroon tailcoats, orange knickerbockers, and flat straw hats called boaters. They also carried knobbly sticks, used for hitting each other with while teachers weren't looking."
"How come we don't get sticks that we can hit people with?" Sirius asked.
"That would be fun." James said excitedly.
Remus shook his head. Lily was secretly wishing that she had a stick that she could use to hit Sirius and James with at that moment.
As he looked at Dudley in his new knickerbockers, Uncle Vernon said gruffly that it was the proudest moment of his life. Aunt Petunia burst into tears and said she couldn't believe it was her Ickle Duddykins. He looks so grown up.
"Can I gag?" Sirius asked.
"Is she in denial?" James asked.
The tube was full of what looked like dirty rags swimming in gray water.
"What's this?" he asked Aunt Petunia….
"Your new school uniform," she said….
"Oh," he said, "I didn't realize they had to be so wet."
"Uh, oh. He's starting to sound like Sirius." Remus laughed thinking about Harry's comment.
"Hey! I resent that!" Sirius exclaimed.
"Well, I'm proud of that comment." James beamed.
"And I marry him why?" Lily asked herself out loud not thinking.
James was the only one to hear what Lily had just said. He smiled, but dared not speak about his win, knowing the pain that would come if he did.
The friends read about how Harry went to get the mail and found a letter addressed to him.
Turning the envelope over, his hand trembling, Harry saw a purple wax seal bearing a coat of arms; a lion, an eagle, a badger, and a snake surrounding a large letter 'H'"
"Yes! My son makes it into Hogwarts!" James exclaimed.
"Was there ever any doubt?" Lily asked him.
"No, but it's good to know."
Lily shook her head with a smile. That boy was so odd.
"Hurry up boy!" shouted Uncle Vernon from the kitchen. "What are you doing, checking for letter bombs?" He chuckled at his own joke.
"That really wasn't that funny." Remus said, and the others nodded in agreement.
They read on about Harry's struggle with his relatives about the letter, and how Uncle Vernon sent Harry and Dudley out of the room.
Harry and Dudley promptly had a furious but silent fight over who would listen at the keyhole; Dudley won, so Harry, his glasses dangling from one ear, lay flat on his stomach, listening at the crack between door and floor."
"A marauder in the making." James smiled thinking about all the mischief his son would cause and wishing he'd get a chance to make some with him.
"We're so proud." Sirius and Remus said together.
They read how, as a few days passed for Harry, more letters came.
After burning all the letters, Vernon got out a hammer and nails and boarded up the cracks around the front and back doors so no one could go out. He hummed "Tiptoed Through the Tulips" as he worked, and jumped at small noises.
"I'm surprised they didn't replace it with petunia." Sirius said thoughtfully.
"What are you talking about?" Remus asked.
"Flowers, Moony—tulips…petunia."
"Tiptoed through the petunia. That sounds dirty." James joked.
"Ugh. Why did you have to say that? Now I have to obliviate myself!" Sirius exclaimed, in complete and total disgust.
"That would save us a lot of trouble." Remus joked.
"No post on Sundays," he reminded them cheerfully as he spread marmalade on the newspaper….
"Wait…did it really say newspaper?" asked Remus
"Are you suggesting that I can't read… again?" asked Sirius acting offended.
"Yes, but that's beside the point. Does it?"
"Yes" Sirius said, showing Remus the page.
After reading over the section, Remus came to a conclusion, "He's losing it."
As they read on, much more time had passed for Harry and Vernon's sanity, or lack there of, depleted even more. By the time his birthday arrived, Vernon had temporarily moved the entire family to a light house in the middle the sea.
The whole shack shivered and Harry sat bolt upright, staring at the door. Someone was outside, knocking to come in.
"Any money it's Hagrid. Dumbledore always gets him to do his dirty work." James said
"I'm not taking that bet. I lost last time." Remus said.
The friends all went to bed that night thinking about the book.
Lying in his bed, James was lost in thought. I get to marry Lilly! I GET TO MARRY LILY! And we have a son! A SON! Sure, we never really get to know him because we die… wow that's kind of depressing. But still… I'm going to make that girl happier than she has ever been in her life! Even if we don't have that much time together.
Remus laid in his bed staring at the ceiling as his thoughts raced through his mind. If this book was truly what would happen in the future, why had it appeared in the Potter's library? Had it been placed there for them to discover it? What purpose did it serve? What did the future hold for him? As he continued to think, another thought came to his mind: Why worry about it? It was off in the future, it wasn't affecting him right now, he should enjoy the time he has with his friends and ponder on the more difficult points at a later date. With a small smile at his solution, he rolled over falling asleep.
I'm Sirius. Sirius Black. Seriously Black. No, really. I'm serious! I am Sirius….That's right! I have a godson! Cool! Why doesn't that book mention me more? I should be right there corrupting him as he grows up. I'm hungry. I wonder if the house elves will make me something. It's late. I should probably wait until morning. Nope…not gonna happen. I need food. He got out of bed and headed down to the kitchens to antagonize the house elves.
Lily, on the hand was lying in her bed having a fight with herself. There is no possible way that this book is real. It just can't be… Oh come on, you know you want it be. Why, pray tell, would I want this book to be reality? Because of James. Don't even get me started with that. You know very well that there is way to many "coincidences" for this book not to have at least some level of truth Lily.Think about it, the description of Petunia, her attitude towards magic, her boyfriend, the stuff about you and James. WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT? You know as well as I do that you secretly love him. Please. There is about as much truth in that statement as there is in Divination. Fine, believe what you want to believe, but one day you're going to know that I'm right. Lily drifted off to sleep, and much to her dismay, dreamt of James and Harry.
