AN: How long has it been now? (checks watch) Hmm, apparently VERY long. Hehe… (scratches back of head) I am so, so sorry. (Yaoi fangirls throw rotten tomatoes at Bianca).
HEY! HEY! That's enough! I have decided to "reward" you for the wait.
(fangirls hold tomatoes)
Lot's of humor!
(Is immediately pelted with the tomatoes again)
I've also got to say, that you readers are lucky! Right now, I've got strep throat... Meaning I've got nothing better to do on a Sunday afternoon than write smutty fanfiction.
(Cheering is heard in the background)
You guys are all so mean ... Cheering when a fellow writer has strep throat.
Whatever, I'd do the same thing...
Oh, and a message to all the reviewers: I la la lav you all! I'll try to reply to ur reviews! Maybe in the next chapter… SO ON WITH THE STORY!
One Long Week - Chapter 4
Sasuke's POV
Watching Naruto crawl out of the bathroom this morning was frightening.
Watching the idiot look at me pretending to sleep and him mumbling about rape was mortifying.
Watching him grumble as he rubbed his sore ass from sleeping on the cold floor was a tad sexy.
But waiting for him to say something about how I practically jumped his bones was aggravating, irritating, tedious, horrifying.
I watched the dobe lazily scramble around for a short and some non-crusty underwear. After watching him change (which wasn't helping my morning wood), I made some motions to indicate I was "waking up." This, clearly, was so Naruto could possibly address the fact that, I don't know, ALMOST FUCKED HIM DRY.
Of course, Naruto said nothing.
After several death stares™ and eye twitches, I finally remembered that Uchihas don't ever lose their balls, so I finally said:
"So Naruto, I noticed you sent out a doppelganger last night to sleep beside me."
He stopped what he was doing. I sat up in my bed and stared.
"Oh, that, heh heh," Naruto began. "That's because, uh, I, heh heh." The poor blonde starched the back of his head nervously. "Well, I actually just sent out one of my dolls because I was… hungry."
"Hungry?"
"Yeah, uh, hungry. My stomach wouldn't quit grumbling so I got up in the middle of the night to get ramen… I didn't want you to wake up and be, uh, scared that I wasn't there."
"Hn." Yeah right Naruto. That guy's about as good an actor as he is at not eating ramen.
But… if he sent out one of his dolls… that means… that means Naruto didn't get the memory of his bunshin. It's not like I'm complaining! Oh no. I mean, if the dobe had gotten the memory, the scenario would probably play out like so:
"Hey Naruto, what's u-"
"EW! GAY GAY GAY GAY GA-"
Yeah, I'll stop it there.
So Naruto and I awkwardly get prepared and continue on our I don't want to waste all my tree-jumping energy on emo angsting.
Hell, who am I kidding? I do that for a living.
But I was lucky the usuratonkachi didn't figure it out. Very, very lucky. We Uchihas aren't known for our luck, after all.
"I disagree," a voice in my head piped up. "If Naruto had discovered your feelings for him, he might have returned them."
Oh great. Positive Paul... again. And people wonder why I'm emo. It's not that my entire clan was killed by my brother, but the fact that there are voices in my head that drive me insane. Insane with positivity, I mean.
"No way dude, the blond has had the hots for Sakura ever since he was 13. No way he'd fall for a guy, especially not a mean, depressing and negative one."
Hn, I forgot about Dani. God, I hate my life.
"But that was just a childhood crush," Paul interjected. "He's seventeen now. If you ask me, he should be over it by now."
"Maybe, but that may not mean he's gay."
"But what about that orange jumpsuit, hm? I wouldn't know any straight guy who would wear something like THAT."
"Rock Lee wears an equally hideous jumpsuit and he's straight too,"
"FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SHUT THE FUCK UP!" I interrupted.
I have had enough of the voices in my head. I've had enough foolish talk. I've had enough of crazy pondering inside my head!
Luckily, my un-Uchiha-like outburst shut the two bastards up.
Unluckily, it stopped a certain blond haired boy from tree jumping. Said boy turned my way, and gave me an 'are-you-still-sane?' kind of look.
I wanted to scream back at him, "NO, I'M NOT STILL SANE! I'VE GOT THESE STUPID PEOPLE INSIDE MY HEAD TELLING ME WHAT TO FUCK/NOT FUCK YOU AND IT'S DRIVING ME NUTS"
... But I decided against that. I just gave him my glare(TM).
"Erm..." the blue-eyed boy scratched the back of his head uncomfortably." Why don't we stop for lunch? It seems we could both use a break."
"Fine." I said as nonchalantly as I could. Inside I was shaking.
The demon vessel had packed our lunch. I didn't need to ask what he had put in
our lunch to figure out what we were going to eat.
But to my (extreme) surprise, Naruto didn't pull out any ramen, but he pulled out two neatly packed bentos!
I'm not dreaming or anything, am I?
I slapped the usuratonkachi, just to be sure.
"Oi teme, the hell's your problem?"
I smirked a little, just to annoy him. "Just checking to see if it's you."
When he gave me that priceless confused expression, I rolled my eyes and filled him in. "The food, dobe. I thought the only thing on earth you would ever pack would be ramen. So why on earth did you bring bentos?"
He smiled and gave me a shy smile... the kind of smile you aren't accustomed to seeing on Naruto's face.
"Heh heh, well..." he began nervously, twiddling his thumbs. "I know you're used to, well, classier kinds of food, so I decided to make a special lunch for us."
I nearly melted! That was very sweet of him, even if it was just a friendly gesture.
But, as usual, I just kept on my emotionless expression and tried to hide all the redness I could feel creeping to my face.
Damn. Love makes me stupid. Must stay emo must stay emo must stay emo...
I turned my head away and stared at the ground. "Hn, dobe."
Instead of the usual reaction ("Whad'ja call me?") he just smiled and ate his bento (which, by the way, did have some ramen in it... but what would you expect?).
His smile made my lips turn upward, ever so slightly. I really do have to keep my emotions on track... but it's getting harder by the second.
We ate in silence for a while. I guess we were both tired. I know my night was pretty damn traumatizing, but I don't know about his.
The quietness wasn't awkward, thankfully. I suppose we've just become so accustomed to each other. It was nice, nonetheless.
Finally, the kyuubi container spoke up. "Hey Sasuke, can I ask you a question?"
"You just did, idiot."
Naruto's POV
I ignored him and continued. I'm not usually this level-headed. Love/barely sleeping will do that to you.
Dani (the annoying bastard) had mentioned earlier that if Sasuke wasn't gay, he'd have gone out with one of his fangirls already. Or maybe Paul said that...
Anyway, I wanna know if that's true, but it's kinda a weird question to ask your supposedly straight best friend.
"Um," I squirmed a little. I will ask him! I can do this! "Are you gonna finish your bento?"
I'm mentally kicking myself in the head right now. Really, I am. Dani's laughing.
"Hn." was his answer. I wonder if he's secretly becoming Shikamaru and is becoming too lazy to say anything else.
"I mean, that's not what I meant." I stumbled over my words. "What I really wanted to ask, was, er, well-"
"What!" the guy was getting more annoyed with me by the minute! Better ask it while I can.
"How come you never got yourself a girlfriend?"
He looked stunned. "Um..."
"Well, I mean," I continued stupidly. "You have, like, ten billion fangirls. Why haven't you ever... you know, dated them?"
He turned his onyx eyes towards the sky, thinking. "I guess I'm just not interested in screaming, crazy girls."
I cocked my head to the side. "Oh? Why not?"
Now he looked down. And did I just catch a hint of crimson on his cheeks? No way. This must be a once in a lifetime thing. I wish I had a camera!
"Um, Naruto, you have to promise to still like me after I tell you this?"
I gave him thumbs up. "I'll always like you, Sasuke!" How could he not know that? Even after he ran off to Orochimaru and abandoned Sakura and me just to kill Itachi on some bent revenge scheme. I mean honestly, most people probably would have given up on the bastard. I never did, not once. Even now I love him more than ever. I don't think anything could drive us apart. Our friendship has lasted this long, even though I do want to be more then friends now.
"Nothing will change between us for the worse, right?"
I don't think I've ever seen Sasuke this scared to do or say something before. It's making me a little nervous, but I can tell he needs some reassurance. "Not for the worse! Never!"
"Okay," he began. "It's a little hard to say this but, um-"
"Just say it! It'll probably be better to get this off you chest!"
"Uh," he couldn't even look at me. This must be embarrassing for him. "I think I'm gay."
Did he really just say that?
"Is that true?"
"I guess..."
DATTEBAYO DATTEBAYO DATTEBAYO DATTE-
I had to stop myself! I was doing summersaults inside my head! This is awesome! This means I have a chance with him! I am so excited! But wait, what if he knows he's gay because he experimented with Itachi or something.
Nah, he would never do anything with Itachi. (AN: Right, ItaSasu fangirls? XD)
Oh! Maybe he has a boyfriend or something! That would be horrible. It definitely explains why his hair is so damn nice all the time though. What if he has a crush on some guy already? Hmm, that wouldn't be good. I've gotta know!
"What's with that stupid smile? This is serious!"
Heh heh, I guess my enthusiasm is really obvious. "Um, I was just wondering if you, ya know, had a crush on anyone."
Well, I was wondering.
Sasuke's expression didn't change when he answered. "I do."
NO WAY! THAT SUCKS! I'M GONNA KILL WHOEVER IT IS! "Oh really? Do I know him?"
"Yes."
That will make killing him easier. "Does he live in Konoha?"
"Yes."
"Is he hot?"
"Yes, very."
"Would I like him?"
"You sure do."
Well, I don't like him now. "What's he like?"
The raven pondered this for a minute. "Happy, very rough, extremely annoying but he grows on you. He's also stupid. In fact, he's one of the stupidest people I know."
That's good. Stupidity is only cute at first, but then eventually is gets old. I can beat this guy out! "Does he know you like him?"
The Uchiha grinned a bit. "Well, I'm dropping hints but I don't think he gets it."
This is great! Makes my chances even better! I'm getting excited! "Oh yeah?"
"Yeah. Like, even when I'm right beside him, he doesn't get it. Even at the most obvious hints I can think of."
Now Sasuke's face is really, super close to mine. I can smell his breath. Damn, it smells delicious. I want a taste, but I don't dare. He'd kick me into the next century.
"Wow dude, this guy sounds like a total moron!" I say happily.
"More like dobe," he mutters.
"Oh!" I snap my fingers in realization, "Is it Kiba?"
"No," he groans. Man, is he ever grumpy today! "I'll give you a hint: we've kissed before."
DAMMIT! "Um, so, did you enjoy it?"
"Yup."
DAMMIT AGAIN! SHIT THAT SUCKS!
"And," he continues. ''I liked it a lot. But I pretended I didn't because many people were watching."
"Oh." That sounds a little familiar. That guy sure is lucky that he kissed Sasuke! I did once, but you can barely call it a kiss. It was more like a lips-touch-by-accident sorta thing.
"Mmhm. It was a long time ago."
"I don't think you should go after this guy, Sasuke."
He gave me this startled/hurt expression. "H...huh?"
"Yup, I think you should give up completely and go after a new one!" Damn, I'm so smart! Now Sasuke'll fall for me for sure! I'll tell him to give up on this guy and make him fall in love with me!
But the poor black-haired guy only look rejected. "Give up on him?"
I nodded my head in agreement enthusiastically. "Yes, definitely. Go after someone who isn't so stupid." Someone like me, I should say. "Also," I continued smartly. "He may not be gay."
His shoulders slumped. "He, isn't?"
My plan is working! "He probably isn't! So you should give up on him!"
I smiled in triumph when he wasn't looking. Now Sasuke'll be mine for sure!
"Why don't we get moving again? I wanna make it to the Village Hidden in Sound as quickly as possible," my future boyfriend said.
"Okay! We'll make it there in no time!"
Sasuke just gave me this dejected look. What's his problem?
(Later, at night)
Sasuke's POV
Naruto and I didn't bother checking into our second hotel. We decided sleeping outside would be safer, if this hotel was anything like the one Kakashi had booked us the night before. We ended up jumping past it, anyway. We actually covered more ground than necessary today.
But what can you expect? Naruto doesn't love me. So instead of wasting my time and energy on stupid, moronic love, I spent it on getting to our destination. Now I'm glad it's night. I feel more at home during this time. I found a nice little river and I'm listening to the water flow. It's relaxing and calming, almost like it'll ebb away at my hurt until it disappears. I don't think that will happen for a long time though. I cover my hands with my face, and I notice it's wet. Have I been crying? I feel a tear roll down my face.
Love sucks. I haven't cried in a long, long, long, long, long, long, LONG time.
I wanna just end it all. I can't do it now though, and leave Naruto alone on the mission. Why did I bother coming back to Konoha anyway? Damn, I hate this.
I can hear footsteps coming my way. I can tell they belonged to a certain blond boy, due to the upbeat rhythm of the steps. I quickly wipe the tears off my face, and think of something happy. I can't think of anything though. Thank kami it's dark out. I can hardly see, so chances are, Naruto won't be able to see either.
"Hey Sasuke!" called a breathless voice.
"Hey," was my muffled reply. He was the last person I wanted to see.
"Why're you being extra emo today?" the idiot asked instantly.
Oh, no reason. You just tore out my heart and mashed on it, that's all. No big deal, just like to overdo things, as usual.
Instead, I answered. "I'm not being emo, for God's sake."
He rolled his eyes with a smile. "Of course, of course."
It was quiet for a bit. You could hear the crickets chirping and the frogs croaking. It would have been nice, except for the fact that I was sitting beside the guy who just completely rejected me (and is now acting like the whole thing never happened like a total dick). Why the hell do I still like him? I must be some kind of usuratonkachi... I guess it's contagious.
After a while of that comfortable (detestable) silence, he shifted slightly, and I could feel the awkward waves radiating off him. He was about to say something important, I could sense it.
"So, er, Sasuke..." he began. I swear, despite his super-ninja skills, he is totally predictable. "I also have a confession to make."
"Just say it, moron." I grunted. Right now I didn't want to hear his little secret. I don't want him to try and trust me and become amazing friends. It would just make my rejection wound sting more.
Unluckily, Naruto can't read signs. He just continued on with his story without a care.
"I just wanted you to know..." He went on, "that I'm gay too."
Dun dun dahhhh! And it's out!
Now I can get on with what we fangirls REALLY want.
Review?
:D
I'll be sure to write extra yaoi for those reviewers!
