AN~ All right, guys. Feel free to throw tomatoes at me. This took WAY longer than I expected. On the plus side, it's camp NaNo this month, and I'm doing fanfics for my project- which means updates will actually happen in April (if you follow me, you'll have noticed I've been uploading). So expect more- maybe not on this story, but on my others, definitely.
Some Review Replies:
Amy: Thanks!
Anonymous: Glad you liked it!
Axel Treehorn: I am here! Sorry, there was some writer's block. Why do you have an account on wattpad but not here?
Guest 1: NO, nonononononono, nothing but torso. Promise.
Guest 2: I did!
Guest 3: Okay *whispers back*
Hihihi: I wrote a fourth chapter. Unfortunately for you, this story WILL end eventually (probably sometime in 2015), because I like conclusions. But thank you!
Robin Goodfellow: I'm glad you like it so much. :) Honestly, the sixth book was not one of my favorites, but I'll assume you liked it.
Sabrina's question about where she and Puck were going to sleep was doomed to go unanswered, at least until she had time to bring it up again. The reason for this was that, at that moment, Mr. Canis came running through the door. This was unusual. Since he'd become human, Mr. Canis did not run. Aside from his apparently still-intact immortality, he was a perfectly regular, slightly emotionless old man. But right now he was running through the house with a panicked expression on his face.
That was enough to make Sabrina very nervous.
"What's wrong, old guy?" Puck asked, smirking at Mr. Canis. "Tick off an old enemy who's figured out you can't fight back anymore?"
This set off an image in Sabrina's head of Red standing protectively between a cowering Mr. Canis and someone with a sword, and she had to shove the picture out of her head before she started laughing. This isn't a time for humor. Nothing scared Mr. Canis.
"I would recommend running instead of making poor jokes, boy," Mr. Canis panted. "The hag is on her way over, and she is not happy."
Puck crowed. "Baba Yaga?" he demanded, grinning. "Awesome! I've missed that old creeper!"
Sabrina smacked him. "What's she upset about?" she asked.
"The loss of the book," Mr. Canis said, as if this should be obvious. "I believe she wants to punish us for losing it."
In fact, at that moment, there was a boom that shook the whole house, and a crackling voice shrieked, "You had ONE job! One job!"
The people in the living room started talking, and Sabrina heard several of them raising their voices.
"I suppose I had better see what she wants," Granny's voice rose above the rest.
Mr. Canis sat down at the table with a sigh. "This is not going to end well," he said softly.
Puck tugged at Sabrina's arm. She tried to resist, but ended up following him anyway, to keep from being dragged across the floor. "Come on!" he said. "This is going to be so awesome!"
Sabrina could have thought of about a hundred other adjectives to describe what was about to happen, and none of them were 'awesome.' She followed Puck anyway. Granny might need backup, if her diplomacy failed.
"Can I help you, old mother?" Granny was asking when they got there.
"The wolf tells me you've lost the Book!" Baba Yaga shrieked.
Granny sighed. "Well, it's been stolen, but yes. It's gone."
Sabrina winced. This was not going to end well.
Puck, on the other hand, grinned. "I wish I'd brought popcorn," he whispered to Sabrina.
Sabrina smacked him with his own hand and shushed him.
"How could you lose it?" Baba Yaga demanded. "That thing is more precious than all your lives together- you don't know what Bunny did to that thing! Fools! You and her! All of you! How on earth could you lose that book?"
"I seem to remember that you have been the subject of thievery before, Old Mother. Should I blame you for those the way you're blaming me now?" Granny pointed out, her voice almost even, with just a touch of acid in it. "Or shall we admit that for every locked door, there is someone who can break in, and move on to try and recover this before anything worse happens?"
Baba Yaga opened her mouth, and then closed it again, her eyes narrowing. "Fine," she snapped.
Sabrina had rarely been more impressed by her grandmother.
Granny smiled. "Good," she said. "Now would you like to come have a cup of tea while we discuss what to do next?"
The hag of the hills grumbled under her breath but followed Relda into the kitchen, slamming the door behind her.
Sabrina snickered. The sight of the most powerful person in Ferryport Landing throwing a tantrum like Sabrina's younger brother was the best thing to happen in this whole horrible day. She told Puck, "I can see why you idolize her."
"I know, she's awesome, right?" Puck exclaimed
"Actually I meant you're both really immature," Sabrina said.
Puck stuck his tongue out at her and said, "And proud of it."
Sabrina rolled her eyes and dragged Puck back to the kitchen. He didn't resist very much.
When they got there, though, Granny was shutting the door. "I'm sorry, lieblings, but I think it's best if just the two of us talk, all right?" she said.
"Come on!" Puck complained. "You can't shut us out of the good stuff!"
The door, though, was closed just the same, almost hitting Puck in the nose. Sabrina swallowed a sarcastic comment (I think she just did), and pulled Puck away. Granny would explain later. Probably. And if not, Sabrina would just snoop it out.
If she could sneak with this... thing attached to her wrist.
"Can we at least pretend to be productive?" she asked, glaring at him. "Like find a place to sleep or something? I'm not sleeping on your trampoline again. We're too old for that." She didn't even want to think about what that would be like. It was a good thing her dad was too overprotective to ever let that happen.
"Well then why don't we just sleep on the floor, then!" Puck snapped, throwing up his hands in exasperation, glaring at Sabrina as her dragged her hand with him.
This was actually probably one of the best solutions they'd come up with. It wouldn't be comfortable, but Sabrina knew they had plenty of sleeping bags, and then there would be no chance of awkwardness. They'd be separated by two thick layers of nylon and fleece.
So Sabrina grinned at him and said, "All right, let's go find some sleeping bags!" and dragged him up the stairs.
Puck, while letting himself be dragged, complained loudly, "I didn't mean now, dogface!"
"Well tough beans," Sabrina snapped, rushing down the hallway.
Puck groaned, and as they passed Pinocchio's room, he shouted, "You better get that antidote fixed up soon, puppet boy, before I kill Grimm- or worse, kill myself!"
"Antidote is not the correct word, and I'm working on it!" Pinocchio shouted through the doorway. "But if you really want me to work fast, you might want to reconsider insulting me, or I'll gladly let you kill yourself."
"I'll help," Sabrina offered. "Then I can scrape your dead flesh off my hand and be free again."
Puck rolled his eyes. "I think you need to go back to therapy, Grimm- you're getting freaky again."
Sabrina, who liked to pretend that her history in therapy (it had consisted of her sitting in a chair talking her way carefully around why she had abandonment issues and PTSD, and because she couldn't be honest, it hadn't helped too much. She'd ended up getting a handle on her temper- mostly- out of sheer stubbornness, to convince her parents she didn't need to go anymore, although she still had nightmares and fought down the occasional panic attack) hadn't actually happened, glared at Puck and stormed faster to the closet at the end of hall.
Reaching it, she threw the door open, then stood on tiptoe and stretched for the sleeping bags, which were stuffed onto the highest shelf in the upstairs closet. She couldn't reach the the things. Not for the first time, Sabrina cursed the two years of malnourishment which had left her far shorter than most girls her age.
Puck shot her a smug grin and asked, "Need a boost, shrimp?"
"Shut up and grab the sleeping bags," Sabrina ordered.
"Tou-chy," Puck sang, still grinning. But he grabbed the bags. "I call the softer one," he said.
Sabrina rolled her eyes. "They're the exact same bag, dumbo. The only thing different about them is the color."
"Then I call the green one," Puck said.
As one bag was green-brown and the other was blue-green, Sabrina decided not to say anything. She just picked up the one Puck had dropped and headed off to her room to grab some pillows.
Puck followed, muttering under his breath about ungrateful peasants. Sabrina ignored him. She took her pillow and a particularly comfortable pillow that had been hers before Daphne stole it, and continued to drag Puck forward, this time back downstairs. She was going to make herself as busy as she could until Granny would tell her what was going on.
Back in the living room, she set the bedding down among the stacks of books. She'd have to clean up before they could sleep. Otherwise she'd be on the couch and Puck would have to make do with whatever (it wasn't her problem).
"Hey!" Daphne protested, looking up from her book as Sabrina and Puck made their loud way into the room, Puck plowing into stacks of books and Sabrina not caring. "That's my pillow!"
"It's mine, actually," Sabrina said, "You stole it. And since I'm sleeping on the floor tonight, I'm stealing it back. You get a whole bed to yourself- no complaining."
Daphne considered. "Fair point," she conceded, and went back to her book.
Veronica looked up at the squabble, noticed the sleeping bags, and said, "Oh, that's a good idea." She smiled at Sabrina and went back to her research, too.
"Find anything yet?" Sabrina asked.
Puck sat down on top of one of the least precarious piles of books, smirking as he pulled Sabrina down with him. She toppled to the ground, knocking over more books as she went, and glared back up at him.
Veronica shook her head. "Not much. But we've got a lot of books to go. And I think your father's doing better. I haven't talked to him in a while." She waved in the direction of her cell phone.
Sabrina nodded at her mother, subtly feeling around with her free hand for the book that would bring Puck's seat crashing down like a pile of Jenga blocks.
Basil, who'd been sitting nearby looking bored, noticed what Sabrina was doing and snickered. The boy was fond of both his sister and her blond frenemy, and a frequent contest between them was seeing who could get Basil on their side. It looked like Sabrina was winning at the moment. Basil usually liked the person who could make him laugh.
"I found a couple things," Daphne said, waving at a sheet of paper next to her with her nose still buried in her book. "I wrote them down for later. Puck's sitting on the books that might be useful."
Sabrina froze in the middle of pulling Puck's seat out from under him, eyes widening. Whoops.
Basil continued to snicker.
"Traitor," Sabrina muttered to her little brother.
The redheaded boy gave her an angelic smile.
"What's Granny doing?" Red asked, speaking for the first time.
Sabrina tried not to jump. She hadn't noticed the silent girl. Red was as small for her age as Sabrina was, and she'd buried herself behind a pile of books, effectively making herself invisible.
"She's talking to Baba Yaga," Sabrina answered. "I don't know what about- she wouldn't let us in."
"What about my Papa?" Red asked, her head poking out from above the top of her stack, now.
"Who cares?" Puck asked with a shrug. "He went out back with Jake a while ago."
Sabrina hadn't noticed that. She gave Puck a look, and he grinned at her. "And you're supposed to be the one who's good at spying," he gloated.
"Shut up, you jerkbag," Sabrina said, rolling her eyes as she smacked him lightly.
"I hope everything's okay," Red said softly.
"I hope they're done soon," Daphne said. "It's almost lunchtime."
Puck's stomach growled in agreement.
At that moment, Uncle Jake poked his head through the door. "Hey, guys. Mom doesn't look like she'll be done for a while, so I was thinking about heading out to grab lunch. Who wants to come with?"
Daphne, Basil, and Puck surged up, shouting "Me! Me! Me!" at the top of their lungs. Sabrina had little choice but to let herself be dragged after. Red and Veronica followed more slowly.
They met Mr. Canis by the jalopy, and most of the crew squeezed into it. Sabrina, though, dragged Puck over to her parent's car, following her mom. She didn't care how good Uncle Jake was at driving the monster, she was still pretty sure it was going to fall apart underneath them one of these days.
Veronica followed Jacob at a reasonable speed down the mostly empty wooded streets of Ferryport Landing. They passed more houses than Sabrina would have expected three years ago. The town was relatively bustling- it was surprising how many people had stayed, once they knew they could leave.
Nobody said anything when Uncle Jake sped up past Sacred Grounds and headed for the Blue Plate Special, but Sabrina heard her mom sigh and felt Puck's hand stiffen in hers.
So he still wasn't better, then. She'd wondered. For a while, Uncle Jake had been downright frightening (so much so that she'd wondered why Puck went with him), but recently he'd seemed to cheer up a bit more. But apparently he was just getting better at hiding how upset he still was.
That was the kind of person her uncle was, though. He didn't want people to know how much he hurt, so he pretended to be happy until he was alone. Sabrina guessed Puck saw a lot more of how much Uncle Jake still wasn't okay than the rest of them did.
She'd have made a mental note to spend some time just sitting with Jake, letting him be sad, if she weren't attached to Mr. Bravado himself.
They arrived at the restaurant before Sabrina could think of a different way to be there for her uncle, and Puck dragged her out of the car, saying, "Come on, Grimm! I'm starving!"
Sabrina didn't point out that walking faster wouldn't get the food on the table any sooner. She was surprised at how fast she was getting resigned to her situation.
That is, until they got into the diner and it was full of people she knew.
Sabrina's face instantly turned crimson and she was more aware of her hand in Puck's than she'd known she could be aware of her own body. She didn't have to look at Puck to know he was as bright red as she was, she could tell by the way he stopped running and slid behind Daphne.
She'd thought it was bad when Snow and Charming came over, but this... This was a whole new level of humiliation. It didn't even matter that most of them weren't even looking at her. She was sure- absolutely certain that they'd notice eventually. And then the knowing looks would start, and the snickers. These people knew her. They knew Puck. And they had long memories.
She would never live this down.
Her one consolation was that her friends back in New York would never see it.
Blue Farrah gave them a smile from the counter and called, "Sit wherever you like, loves!"
There weren't a lot of choices, so Sabrina and Puck led the way to a back booth, keeping the others between their clasped hands and the rest of the room. The booth was one of the big ones that wrapped around the corner with eight seats, and Daphne sped into the corner seat before anyone else could.
"No fair!" Basil complained. "Mom! She got the corner seat last time!"
"You snooze, you lose!" Daphne smirked at Basil.
Veronica sighed. "Daphne, could you let your brother have the corner seat?"
Daphne sighed and scooted over next to Red. Everyone else filed in without a problem.
Sabrina learned, in this moment, how hard it is to handle a two-foot tall menu with one hand. After dealing with it in frustration for several minutes, her left hand stubbornly underneath the table where nobody could see it, she gave her mother a pitiful look.
Veronica laughed. "What do you need the menu for? You always order the same thing, anyway."
"It's the principle of the thing," Puck said. He, Sabrina noticed, hadn't even tried to open his menu. When she gave him a curious look, he grinned at her. "I'm getting one of everything."
Jake raised his eyebrows and said, "And who's paying for your everything?"
Puck's eyebrows drew together and he said, "Fine. Then I'm gonna need a hand with my menu."
What surprised Sabrina the most about this exchange was how parental her uncle seemed. And how much Puck listened. Most times the two came to visit, they acted like good friends, or they were arguing, or they just didn't interact much at all. But she'd never seen Uncle Jake pull something like this. It could have been an exchange between her father and Daphne and she wouldn't have known the difference.
Maybe that was why Puck stayed with a guy who was so very not okay emotionally. Maybe he appreciated having a kind of dad when his own had been such a failure.
She shoved the thoughts out of her brain. What would these two think if they knew she was psychoanalyzing them? They'd probably laugh at her... or point out how much she'd hated being psychoanalyzed herself. Whatever it was, it was their business.
Blue Farrah appeared at their table a few moments later. "What can I get you today?" she asked.
The woman had a knack for appearing just when everyone was ready to order. Sabrina didn't question it, even if it kind of creeped her out sometimes. She was still a great waitress.
Everyone ordered, and Blue grinned. "Coming right up!" she said, sashaying off to the kitchen.
"Sometimes I wonder if she's the only waitress here," Daphne said. "I mean, she's always waiting on us."
"They're a bit short staffed a lot of the time," Veronica said. "I was surprised the place stayed open, with the war going on and all. But now that there are humans here again..."
"I don't see any here," Red's soft voice poked into the conversation.
Sabrina shrugged. "Spring break? They're probably all on vacation. Aren't there humans at your school?"
"We've been going to school in Poughkeepsie," Red said. "There aren't enough people in town to open ours back up."
"Speaking of school," Daphne said suddenly, "Did anybody think to invite Pinocchio?"
Uncle Jake laughed awkwardly. "Whoops."
"Everybody always forgets him," Veronica said, sounding a little sad. "No wonder he was evil."
Sabrina honestly didn't care. She'd rather have Pinocchio working on getting her and Puck unstuck than here making snide remarks. The kid was better now, but he wasn't exactly fun at parties.
Farrah returned with the food, smiling at them all as she dropped stacks of plates in front of each of them. "Enjoy your meal, sweethearts!"
"Does she call everyone pet names, or is it just us?" Daphne asked through a mouthful of food.
Basil, who had been quiet up 'til this point, simply listening, was digging into his food with gusto. He was a pretty quiet kid, actually. It wasn't that he didn't like to talk, it was that he preferred to listen, and he still had some trouble getting words out. Veronica was talking about sending him to speech therapy if he didn't get better soon.
"I think it's everyone," Uncle Jake said. "Or at least all the people she likes."
The conversation stopped as everyone copied Basil, attacking their food and ignoring the people around them. Sabrina struggled a little with her meal, which she'd normally have needed two hands to eat. But it tasted so good, she barely even glared at Puck as she struggled with it.
Midway through the meal, Veronica's phone rang. She looked at it, and said apologetically, "It's Henry- I should take this."
"Only if you put it on speaker," Daphne said primly. This was the Grimm family policy on phones during meals: one could answer one's phone as long as one was perfectly all right with the whole table joining the conversation.
Sabrina didn't answer her phone at the table very often.
"Hey, honey," Veronica said, answering her phone and placing it face up on the table. "What's up?"
"Hi daddy!" Basil piped up.
"Hey," Henry said. His voice wasn't nearly as cheerful as his wife's or his son's. "I found something. Something big. You're gonna want to get here as soon as possible."
AN~ I'd appreciate any constructive criticism you have, or suggestions, or what you liked, or anything you want to say.
Also some information for you: Did you know that this story is the closest I will ever get to a fanfic that is purely wish fulfillment? Yup yup yup.
