I woke up, feeling like everything was okay. The others were around me, though, looking down at me like 'this is so sad.'

"What's up?" I asked.

"?kcis s'eh wonk eh soeD" Red Ace asked, concerned.

"Not this crap." I sighed, then shook my head. I'd learned to speak backwards, the Queen saying it was mandatory to serve under her. I don't know why, but she said insisted.

A/N: To save myself (and you, the reader) a headache, I won't type this chapter backwards. On another note, I have no idea how long this series will be, though it'll probably hit the below-ten mark.-MN1

"I'm fine." I said backwards, though to them it would seem like I was speaking normally. Though when they spoke normally, it would seem backwards to me. It was kind of confusing, but hey, it's Wonderland. "Let's keep going."

"So brave!" Black Spade said, hugging my head.

"Okay, get off of him." Alice said, pulling her off of me. "He's got a girlfriend."

"Is she as pretty as me?" Black Spade asked.

"I wish Wonderlanders would stay consistent." I sighed, standing, after the others left. I put my red velvet suit on, and, suddenly, it changed to a black suit.

"That," I said slowly, "is good and bad." I knew what that meant, as I had studied it. I was rejecting Wonderland, so I was becoming more of an Alice Lander. Previously, I'd accepted everything, but because of these new obstacles and a certain admirer, I wished I was back in Alice Land. I walked out of my tent, receiving several stares.

"So," Alice said. "What's wrong with your clothing?"

"Nothing." I lied. "When are we moving again?"

"You've been asleep all night, so we've actually been put a few hours behind schedule." Hatter said.

"We're late, eh?" I asked, smiling crookedly. "The White Rabbit wouldn't be happy. Let's get going."

"The Rabbit's never happy." Hatter said. "Why are you in a rush, little girl?"

"We've been over this," Alice said to Hatter, sounding like a mother talking to her son who did something wrong. "Abbott is a little boy. I am a little girl."

Hatter nodded like he understood, then said "Can I have some tea?"

Alice sighed, smiling. "Sure."

"He doesn't get it." I said.

"I know." Alice said. "That's what I love about him."

"Eww. I don't talk about Dressmaker around you." I said.

"Dressmaker?" Black Spade asked.

"My girlfriend. She's about this tall, real pale, can make a dress out of just about anything you hand her...Really, a wonderful girl." I said.

Black Spade looked at me, shocked. "I thought we had chemistry."

I sighed, and, instead of shouting 'We've known each other for barely a week!' I decided to take the high road.

I put my hand on her shoulder and said "You're a beautiful, smart girl. But I'm already in a relationship. It's not you, it's me. Maybe we can still be friends." I started pouring on the breakup clichés, and, surprisingly, Black Spade bought it.

"I understand. Thank you for letting me down easy." Black Spade said.

'Well, I wanted to drop you down hard, but grandma's got a sword and is sharpening it pretty threateningly.' I thought, looking out of the corner of my eye at Alice.