"Hi, Alexis, welcome home." Beckett said as the teen opened the door the Castle's apartment.
"Hi, Detective Beckett." Alexis hugged her. "It's great to see you."
"You too." Kate replied with a genuine smile. "We need to have lunch again soon, and catch up."
"I'd like that."
"Is your dad home?" Kate tried to sound casual as she looked past the girl toward the living room.
"He should be back any minute. He just ran out to pick up some food." Alexis took a step to the side. "Come in and wait for him."
"Thanks." Kate stepped inside and followed the teen to the living room. Ashley stood in front of the television, miming bowling. His ball on the screen hit the pins and left him with a seven, ten split.
"Ouch." Kate said with a grimace.
"Any advice, Detective Beckett?" Ashley asked with a smile.
Kate looked at the pins for a moment and walked to the television. She pointed to the left pin. "Hit this one right here."
"I'll try." He said, lining himself up for the shot. He hit the pin a little in front of where she had pointed and he just missed hitting the second pin. "Ahhhh…" He exclaimed.
"Almost got it." Kate said, "Keep working on it."
"Dinner is served!" They heard from the front door.
"Alright!" Ashley said as he headed for the kitchen.
Kate fought the urge to run to the front door like some 50's housewife. She laughed quietly at her mental image of herself dressed like Donna Reed and walked, in a very controlled manner, to the kitchen.
"Detective Beckett," She smiled at the way his eyes lit up when he saw her. Her heart beat a little faster.
"Hi, Castle." She approached him, keeping a respectable distance. "Hope you don't mind. I have something I wanted to talk about."
"Not at all." He walked up to her and steered her away from the kitchen. "Come on back to my office. Save me some moo shoo!" He hollered over his shoulder at the teens.
They had no sooner turned the corner than he grabbed Kate and kissed her. "I couldn't stop thinking about you." He said against her mouth, continuing to kiss her. He backed her against the wall and pressed himself against her. Her hands slid under his shirt and stroked his back, her fingernails gently digging into his skin.
Kate was surprised as how unchecked her emotions were as she kissed Rick Castle. In all aspects of her life, including her romantic relationships, control had always been important to her. She hadn't liked who she had become after her mother's murder, spiraling out of control, making rash choices and showing little regard for those around her. When she had regained her center, she had made an unspoken vow to never let that happen again. Here, though, wrapped around Castle, the near lack of control was intoxicating and terrifying. Stray thoughts came into her head, trying to convince her to release him; to take her time, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. He had always had a curious hold on her and she had often imagined what this moment would be like, but the reality was so much better.
Castle was wrapped in a similar emotional struggle, not wanting to scare her away, terrified of the intensity of his need to touch her. He had been in a lot of relationships over the years, far too many if truth be told, but this was…so much more. This was deep, burning need. Terrifying and amazing.
Castle broke the kiss to look into her eyes. He did not speak, but traced a finger along her hairline, traced her jaw and finally lightly outlined her lips. She reached her hand to caress the hair at the back of his neck.
"Hello, Darling." Martha stood in the doorway, smiling slyly. "Kate, so lovely to see you."
Kate blushed and took a step back from Castle. "Hey, Martha."
"Mother." Castle sounded annoyed. "Did you get some dinner?"
"I already ate, but you'd better get in there if you plan on eating. That Ashley has an appetite." She winked in Kate's direction and walked to the bar as Castle excused himself to the kitchen. "Care for a drink"
"No thanks." Kate replied, a little uncomfortably.
Martha poured two glasses of Scotch and passed one to Kate anyway. "Live a little. This is the really good stuff he doesn't know I've discovered."
Kate laughed as she took the glass and held it under her nose. She closed her eyes and inhaled, letting the warm scent fill her. For a moment, she imagined what it would be like on Castle's breath as he kissed her and whispered her name. She shook off the thought, not liking the way he was invading her every thought.
"Can I offer some unsolicited advice?" Martha asked.
Kate looked at her for a moment before answering. "Sure. Why not?"
Martha smiled and touched Kate's cheek softly. "You are an amazing woman."
Kate looked at the floor and started to speak.
"I mean it." She gently made her lift her face and look at her again. "You're smart. You're drop-dead gorgeous. You are so strong." She paused. "You are so worthy of being happy… and loved."
Kate almost gasped. She had spent so long denying herself opportunities for real happiness, feeling like she didn't deserve it; at least she didn't think she deserved her own happiness until she punished the people who killed her mother. She had never spoken of it to anyone, not even her own father. How could Martha possibly know her so well. Her eyes began to sting.
Martha took her hand. "Don't overthink things." She said simply. "Get out of your head and enjoy yourself." She brushed the single tear away. "Let go of the fear and enjoy yourself."
"I can't lose control." Kate insisted. It's too hard to come back."
"Sure you can." Martha smiled kindly. "Losing control is good for the soul… not to mention how good it is for the body."
Kate laughed out loud. "Martha!" Somehow, Martha could always get through her defenses. It was refreshing to have someone who could see through her so completely. "How do you always know what's in my head?"
"Mother's intuition." Martha replied, squeezing her hand. "This time you have a lot of people who care about you to keep you grounded. We'll all help you stay balanced."
Kate fought back emotion. She had, so many times in the last sixteen years, longed for her mother's advice and knowledge. Martha was the most unlikely of stand-ins, but somehow their relationship worked. "Mother's intuition?"
"Of course. Well, that, and the fact that all the greatest actors can read people like books." She smiled and stood. She pulled Kate into a tight hug. "Give him a chance, Kate. You're really good for each other."
Kate smiled.
"Come on, I'm hungry."
"I thought you already ate."
"I lied. So sue me."
