Hello again!
Thank you so much for all of your reviews! They're really really great, and they really help me better my writing. Well, at least they help better the story. Especially useful and motivating people include KC Evans, Gold Silk, BlueRedemption, Miss. Jenetari, Tea, Lee, Mountain Blue, Authot sama277, antagonistic, Failing Mentality, and Alana. But everybody made me happy. Maybe a little too happy...
Anyway, this chapter made me angry, though not nearly as angry as the last one. I apologize if it's subpar. I went on a small trip to Edmonton (too much family!) and never really recovered. Now I'm in a week-long writing workshop that is sucking the energy right out of me. In a good way.
Addicted - 4
Though he'd never admit it, Sasuke had been rather disappointed that he hadn't gotten to see the meeting between Gaara and his wife. Not for either of their company - definitely not - but to amuse himself by bathing in the tension, awkwardness, and general unpleasantness of their situation.
The entire situation had served to make him momentarily grateful for his freedom in choosing whichever girl he wanted to settle down with. The moment ended with the mix of arrogance and nausea that followed said idea. He knew that he really did have the option of whichever girl, which reminded him of all females' (from ages ten to twenty) persistence when it came to the position of Uchiha Sasuke's Future Bride.
He would also never admit to that shudder of fear he so commonly felt while thinking these thoughts.
Regardless, he had expected much more of a production from Naruto. Tsunade had insisted on privacy for the young kazekage and his beast-girl during their first meeting. Kakashi had voiced his opinion on the subject, being that they wanted as small a group as possible bearing witness to the bloodshed. Sakura had growled upon mention of Umiko's name, while the youngest Uchiha had winced involuntarily. But Naruto's silence had been very worrisome.
The blond boy hadn't been without a smile, though. A very unconvincing, 'I smile because any other expression would attract your stupid, unwanted questions' type of smile. Despite his relatively low EQ and very rarely used powers of empathy, Sasuke was all too aware of what that smile meant, and what those blue, blue, blue eyes - like, really really blue - the deep, dark, light swirly blue beautiful-ness? and the way they just were so... so...blue...?
Wait. What?
He was never eating ramen again. He now blamed it for all things, including his failing thought process.
"Don't care, don't care, don't care," he mouthed. Because he didn't. Quite honestly, the only eyes he'd ever felt the need to worry about were his brother's. And maybe Neiji's once or twice. But mostly Itachi's.
Never Naruto's. Why should he care if Naruto had admittedly beautiful blue eyes? If it upped his oh-so manly sex-appeal (not appealing to Sasuke in the least) it really would give him reason to notice. After all, more girls after Naruto meant less girls after him. This had actually begun to happen after puberty, though during the first few months of admirer conversions he had felt a little jealous. Losing something you'd always had was a difficult thing either way; suddenly others were sitting up and taking notice of a boy who'd always needed to be noticed, and it wasn't fair!
"Stop. Stopitstopitstopit." He didn't want to think about it. Thoughts like those were not only unwelcome, but probably illegal too.
He needed to relax. Sasuke hadn't noticed when he'd needed relaxing before his teammate's body had started to do this weird, chakra-dispensing thing, but now he noticed all the time. If it was before training, he needed to relax. Unwinding was good after training too. No missions to speak of? Don't feel like training? Relaxation is one's only option!
He liked to ignore his actual method for relaxation.
Sasuke squinted his eyes in the waning light. The group, having returned to the bridge after leaving the beast-girl with Gaara, was done for the day. There was nothing left to do and no reason to be there and the Uchiha was surprised that they still were.
Then Kakashi finally showed some indication of leaving. "Well team, you're expected here tomorrow, same time, same place, as always," he said in a bored tone. "And Naruto?" - the boy hmmed to show he was listening - "You'll probably be able to see Gaara now, if you want to. Ja." And then the man disappeared with his customary 'pop'.
As Sakura left for the Yamanaka Flower Shop - probably to warn Ino about Umiko and her interest in her two teammates - Sasuke slid smoothly over to Naruto's side and reached out for his favorite spot on the blond's arm.
He was startled when he seemed to miss completely and tip off balence. Stumbling, he went to try again. Naruto had just started moving at the wrong time; how could a ninja not be ready for that? The second time, the other boy's movements were much more deliberate, and he swung around. "Don't, Sasuke."
There were more surprises, it seemed. "What do you mean 'don't'?"
Naruto put more distance in between them. "I mean what I said. I said don't, and I mean it."
"Then what was earlier?" he demanded venomously. "You weren't saying don't then! If anything, I'd say you were enjoying yourself."
There was a pause, then, "That was a mistake. I don't want you to touch me like that. I don't want anyone to touch me like that right now."
The brunette felt shook with anger and confusion, a feeling of burning rejection turning in his gut. He watched his rival turn his back on him and leave. And he couldn't shake the feeling of awe that was beginning to creep over him. Uzumaki Naruto had been the first one to ever flat-out not want Uchiha Sasuke, even if it hadn't been in a romantic way. Now his biggest rival had presented a different sort of challenge. I'll show you, Sasuke thought vehemently. I will get better than you, I will get to you, and I will get you, Uzumaki.
That wealth of chakra was as good as his.
He would start his going about getting it as soon as he'd taken a nap.
"Why did you marry her, Gaara? Of all the awful girls out there, why did you have to pick the worst one?"
The kazekage didn't bat an eyelash in the face of his Leaf friend's whining. It wasn't anything new, and neither was the boys ignorance.
"I did not choose her to marry, I chose to marry her."
Naruto shook his head. "What the hell are you talking about? I hate you, you know that? You should just say what you mean!"
"And you should mean what you say," Gaara countered calmly.
"Stop that! Just tell me why you did it already!"
There was a silence that filled the room, and Naruto allowed himself a glance or two around the red-head's chambers. It was nice in there, he decided, if not a little dark. The décor might have needed a little work, though it might have just been the ugly clash between Gaara's hair and the mauve curtains, but other than that, the room was perfect. Fit for a village leader.
When the other didn't answer his question, the blond felt his impatience growing. Is he thinking about an answer or is this his 'that question doesn't deserve a response' reaction? Naruto wondered.
Just as he was about to remind Gaara of his question in an overly loud and obnoxious way, the staring green eyes shifted, their focus now on something out the window. "Being kazekage has changed things, Naruto. My life is for my people."
"The same people who hated and hurt you!" He couldn't help the rush of anger.
"They hated me, but they couldn't hurt me. No one could ever hurt me. I couldn't hurt myself."
There was no answer to that. Naruto knew what it was like, had felt that same pain. There had been a point in his early, angst-y teenage life when he'd resented the Kyuubi's healing powers. The fox could not let his host die.
"I am ruler of those people now. They fear me, but they also fear other things. Things like war."
Naruto snorted a laugh. "There hasn't been a war around here in ages! They don't have anything to worry about, then, since I'm pretty sure you're not gonna take 'em all out!"
The other jinchuriki cracked a small smile as he admired the chunin's expressive voice and face. Naruto was like the sand - always changing under the hand of the wind or the rain, different all the time, but always the same. Always Naruto.
Then the subject on hand sobered him. "This is much tension between countries as Akatsuki members run free and Orochimaru has been very quiet lately. Marriage to Umiko secured the alliance between Sand and Cloud, building with it a stronger bond between Cloud and Leaf."
"You didn't have to do that, Gaara. You shouldn't have to sacrifice your happiness!"
The kazekage's eyes narrowed. "Don't you see? That is what the title of Kage means."
Naruto's blue eyes flashed, angry with him, angry for him, and knowing perfectly well how right he was. Hokage was his dream and he had had years to ponder what that would mean for him if it panned out. Which he was certain it would. "You are married at seventeen!" he raged uselessly. "Doesn't that bother you? Doesn't it bother you that you will be stuck with that bitch for the rest of your life? You're too young for that. People like us, we shouldn't have to take anymore than what we already have."
"I'm Suna's youngest kazekage, and every kage, regardless of age, does what is best for his village."
"But she's evil!" the blond spat. "She hates me! She hates us!" He then clapped a hand over his mouth and held it there. There was another pause. The conversation had stopped and changed directions.
Gaara narrowed his eyes. "What did she do?"
"Nothing."
His voice was angry and eerily quiet. "What did she do to you, Naruto?"
"Nothing! She didn't do anything, okay? I just hate her! I just hate the way she looks at me is all." He quieted. "I just don't like her. I don't think you should have to live with her for those people."
The chunin stood to leave, straightening his vest, avoiding those intense green eyes. "I should go. Sorry, Gaara. I'm just kinda stressed out right now."
As he reached for the door, Naruto was stopped by a quiet voice. "They still fear me as a jinchuriki, but now they rely on me for protection as well. It will be like that with you one day." Gaara's attention then turned back to the window and whatever lay outside it, and Naruto sighed. The conversation had ended, as he'd wanted it to, but Gaara would always have the last word.
It had been a peaceful walk home, quiet and in the dimming light, and Sasuke's own footfalls nearly lulled him to sleep right there. It had been almost enjoyable how completely uncluttered his mind was that evening.
Sasuke had been really close to content.
Then, of course, it was ruined. The calm was shattered by a 'pop' and a 'yo!' and the teenager had to fight the urge to run home to his bed so that he could remain unbothered. Instead of this ideal scenario playing out the way it had in his mind, the Uchiha's tired steps ceased in front of a bored-looking jounin.
"What do you want, Kakashi?"
The man looked as though he'd expected such a response. There was a shrug. "Walk with me."
Sasuke complied, knowing without knowing that his team leader would follow him around regardless of whether or not he protested. Submitting is easiest, he thought, only afterwards realizing how close he was to turning into Shikamaru.
The two Sharingan-users strolled silently through the early evening. Though they were headed in the direction of the Uchiha district, that probably wasn't the destination Kakashi had in mind. Sasuke was waiting for his sensei to say what he had to say and leave. He fought the fatigue that slouched his shoulders and dragged his feet, but he knew that if he didn't get this over with quickly, he would lose badly and have to curl up and go to sleep in the middle of the road. Stupid Naruto, playing hard to get. Well, hard to get chakra from, at least. Still, he felt he was above breaching the blond's boundaries. They had a sort of understanding. They pushed each other, got under each other's skin, but they never pushed too far. After all these years, Sasuke knew exactly where the line was, what was too far and what was safe.
Besides, harassment just wasn't the Uchiha's style.
When Sasuke shot a look at his (tor)mentor, he saw nothing but a mask , forehead protector, and one impassive eye. No indication as to what he might want, Kakashi looked for all the world like was just enjoying a turn around the village. A headache bloomed at both temples. This guy was really cutting into his sleeping time, and, lately, he was needing as much of it as he could get.
Finally, Kakashi cleared his throat. Sasuke perked up expectantly. He remained in that state of anticipation for maybe a minute before he realized that the silver-haired man had no intention of voicing his thoughts just yet. The younger fisted his hands; he wanted nothing more than to demand in a Narutoesque way exactly what Kakashi's problem was. That, or take of running towards home, something he was still considering. He couldn't, though. That was probably exactly what his sensei was waiting for. He wanted Sasuke to give up.
Nevaaah! Inner Sasuke cheered wildly. He would wait it out. It was like training, an excercise in endurance. Only this time it was his patience that was being tested. The patience that was feeling maybe even more worn than the rest of him.
Kakashi would speak first. He would win. It would be just one more victory, and it would be happening any time now.
They walked onward (1).
Any time now, Inner Sasuke assured him. Any time.
Five more minutes passed and, though he hadn't seen it, the chunin knew that they'd passed the mansion by quite a bit already. Perfect shinobi posture abandoned him, his back curling over. Five more minutes and it felt like work to even breathe. A ninja worked hard, but once his day was over it was over. Sasuke's day was over, even if he hadn't done much, and he really, really wanted his bed.
Five more minutes and Sasuke's body gave up. He allowed himself to crumple to the ground while trying hard to maintain that Uchiha grace, but rest took priority over both beauty and pride, becoming a heap of black and chunin vest green. "I stop here."
Kakashi stopped too, eyebrow raising. "I think we need to work on your stamina," he said noncomittally.
Sasuke's glaring black eyes were blinking more than they usually did, and he was trying to hold his eyelids up while maintaining a threatening, very unhappy look. "Shut up."
The jounin crouched down beside him. "This is why you've been late. Overtired, can't get out of bed, can't wait to get back into bed, correct?"
Sasuke the Heap nodded slowly.
"Do you know why?"
A shake of the head. "Why, do you?"
Kakshi's eye upturned happily. "Maybe."
Sasuke felt like groaning. He didn't, of course. Inner Sasuke was already upset over his inelegant position on the gravel of the road, and he tried to ignore both this and the pebbles digging into his backside.
"Tell me Sasuke, do you consider yourself a selfish person?"
Immediately his thoughts shot to Naruto. "No," he lied.
"Do you ever place your own interests above the best interests of your team?"
"No."
Kakashi sighed. "Listen, Sasuke, you're going to have to start sorting out your priorities. Your attraction to power is really going to get you into trouble some day."
The boy's eyes narrowed suspiciously. What exactly was that supposed to mean? How much did his teacher see with that one eye? "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Then you're going to have to figure it out on your own. I'm pretty sure there's a lesson to be learned through all of this."
"What? What do you mean you're pretty sure?"
"Walk's over, Sasuke. Do you think you can crawl back home on your own?"
"Screw you."
Kakashi shrugged. "Sorry, not interested. I'm a one-man kinda guy, know what I mean?" He raised a hand. "Ja!"
And then the jounin was gone, leaving an exhausted Sasuke sitting in the middle of the road. He hadn't gotten anything out of their little jaunt, was still a little confused by it, and was a fair ways away from home. He was cold, and his legs didn't feel like working.
Somehow (he would never remember the journey), the Uchiha made it to his own bed in his own room in his own house. Well, mansion. He fell into a heavier sleep than he'd ever experienced before, hating Kakashi with every aching bone in his body. He didn't have any time to remember to hate Naruto, too.
(1) - ONWARD COW! No, I don't own Inuyasha either. I don't even own that movie. It's a sad thing, but I had to say it.
