I have so many ideas running round my head now it is almost impossible to find the time to write them all but gosh darn it am I gonna try! Here's an update for you lovelies. You make it a delight to write, thank you.
I don't know how long it took me to start to think again but when I did, trees surrounded me and there was a wrinkled hand on mine, covered in faint age freckles and deep veins. A voice was calling one of my names sharply, over and over.
"Oldman?" I blinked several times then focused on my human who seemed to be letting out a deep sigh of relief. I blinked and looked around, as he turned to murmur something to someone else, and observed my surroundings in more depth than just ' Trees'.
A massive redwood forest surrounded us, much like the one the scouts used to go to but with thicker branches and much less space between the trees. We were on a large branch, high above the ground; I'd have estimated twenty meters if I was in any state of mind to estimate. On the branches around us many humans stood, huddled together for warmth, all eyes focused, all eyes watching. It wasn't every human there though; I could smell a large number further into the forest, probably looking after the horses and setting up camp somewhere.
I then turned to focus on the ring of humans immediately around me, gazing at me with a range of emotions varying from painfully sincere hope to deep, disgusted loathing. I met the eyes of this source of hatred, not finding myself surprised when I recognised the figure that held the most of it.
" You ... You abandoned us! You abandoned your Squad Leader! You killed them! You killed us!" The officer spat, held back by one of his colleagues who seemed to be perspiring heavily and avoiding looking at me directly. My thoughts started to clear as I stared at the once pompous man who had shouted at the Oldman. Memories trickled slowly through my mind and I looked up at him sharply.
"...You mean that piss man that told me abandon my humans, that they were 'lost'?" I asked him in a mild voice, rubbing my head against the ache building there.
A ripple of whispers echoed through the trees as everyone heard what I said. The pompous man seemed to loose capability of speech as he lunged forwards, drawing his blade out with a high pitched scream. Before I could even blink, several different blades were pointed forwards. I turned to observe the Oldman, Fury and Flexer standing behind me with their blades pointing out. Several other humans I had never spoken too did the same beside them, faces fierce and set against him. Far eyes and Barker had stepped in behind the man and also raised their blades to his throat as he stopped, mere seconds from his demise.
"I'm the second in command! Now in charge after this huh-ore killed Squad leader Kirkan. Stand down or this will be considered mutiny you-!"
"What did you just call her?!" Shouted Barker at the same time as Far Eyes growled out:
"So you can kill her? No chance,"
"That thing is a monster! I'm only putting down a rabid dog!"
"...what is going on?" I asked the Oldman confusedly.
"Hah! Like you don't bloody remember! You left us ! I just saw you take down more than fifteen of those things and you didn't even try to help us! We've lost the wagons because of you!" Spat the man, struggling against the people holding him but shying back as Barker's blade nipped at his skin.
A flurry of gasps and hissed whispers whistled through the forest, like a heart freezing wind. The wagons were what carried what little food they had left, the weapons and the gas. Without them it was likely every- no- everyone would die. The humans looked at me with open mouths and wide eyes, some crying, some full of rage and some torn down the middle of anger and fear.
"Everyone calm down," shouted out Oldman, sending me a quick 'we will talk later' look. "Night is nearly here and we need everyone to help make camp. I'll need volunteers to keep a watch on the horses. Everyone else- join the rest of the squad and anchor yourselves to a thick branch. Try to get some rest and-"
"What good will that do us now?!" Cried out a voice.
"Why should we listen to you old man!?" Someone else fearfully screamed out.
I slowly turned my head to face where that voice came from- expression blank and eyes unblinking- and a hush came over the humans. Then another voice sounded out, loud and panic filled.
"Commander, did you really loose the wagons?"
"It wasn't Green! She came back to help the rest of us! It was the others who lost them!" Shouted another human from somewhere to my right.
"But you've seen her! She's amazing. She could have taken down all of them and gone back! Why didn't she?!"
Voices sprang up left, right and centre; all demanding answers to countless questions. I could see that obnoxious angry soldier smirking bitterly at me from the corner of my eye.
"Hey! All of you," I said, my voice irritable but carrying in the sudden silence as everyone watched me stand tall to stare them down. "I will go get the equipment once the sun sets. Everyone happy?"
The sudden silence was good enough of an answer for me as I turned away from them and sat back down, back against the trunk of the tree. I could feel the obnoxious soldier staring at me with surprise, quickly devolving into anger. He obviously hadn't expected me to do that.
"Everyone just go get some bloody sleep!" Shouted out Far Eyes, breaking the silence in a grumpy voice. "We still need twenty volunteers for the horses so those who aren't dropping off as we speak stay back!"
"John will you be okay here for a moment? I need to talk to E- Eury."
Far Eyes nodded, not taking his flashing eyes off the man beneath his blade.
"Make sure no one kills each other while I'm gone," The Oldman belatedly added.
"No promises," muttered Barker, fist tightening over his blade. He deflated slightly at the stern look the Oldman gave him though. "Okay, fine, Ipromise."
"Come on Eury," the Oldman muttered to me, offering a hand to pull me up that I pointedly ignored. "We're going to visit someone and have a little talk."
To my unpleasant surprise the 'someone' included an unexpectedly bloodied, familiar face.
"Pokerface! What happened to him?!" I asked as I saw the ginger haired man, propped up against the tree trunk, on the branch below us, head and right eye heavily bandaged and face slack.
"I was hoping you could tell me. He came back with these two women tied to his horse, riding yours with you sitting in front of him. He has a crushed foot and is missing an eye, two fingers and a lot of blood,"
I looked blankly at the Oldman then back to Pokerface. On another branch below us, the two women were being attended to, both unconscious but clearly alive.
...I couldn't remember. Why couldn't I remember?
"...I know that you are trying to help but you're starting to worry m- us."
"...you're scared of me..." I found myself saying, still staring at the unconscious figure below.
" I- I am scared but... You... You saved us. You're my friend."
"I'm not scared of you."
"I'm scared for you," the Oldman whispered."You seem to be slipping Eren."
What does that mean? Slipping? How could I, a god, be slip- wait...
"... Eren ?" I asked, turning to stare at the Oldman with startled eyes. The Oldman met my eyes with a faint nod.
"I knew it. You have the exact same eyes- don't deny it Eren. You're angry at almost everyone and everything just like he- you were."
I just continued to stare at the man, mouth clamped up like a vice.
"Is Armin alone then?" the Oldman asked in a too calm a tone. I finally found my voice, licking my lips as I spoke.
"M-Mikasa is with him. I left them both something to protect them- How long have you known?"
"I'm not sure. I first started to think about it the night before we left, when you ducked away from my hand just like he did. You swing your legs the same, you even have the same forced smile. Your eyes though. They were the biggest clue... For a bit I thought I was being old or senile, then I thought about relatives but you were too similar. Then perhaps I thought you were wearing some really realistic disguise...but that's not it," He told me in an almost tired voice, looking at me strangely. "You're not human are you?"
I shook my head silently, my eyes still fixed on his.
"Of course you haven't exactly been hiding it. We all saw you lift a man three times you weight like he was a feather; you have taken down more Titans we can count, with no help and no gear..." The man stopped, hesitating before he indulged his curiosity. "Are you a spirit or a demon or-"
"What the-? Of course not!" I shouted out angrily, throwing my hands in the air as I snapped my head away from him and sat down in a huff. A demon?! Me? How dare he?
There was a long silence as the Oldman watched me warily and I glared into a distance, pulling my legs into my chest and wrapping my arms around them.
"So from what I have seen you can run very fast, fast as a horse, don't need to sleep or eat, are amazingly strong and agile and can change your appearance. Anything else you can do?" He asked with a faint confused chuckle.
"I can grant requests, control the earth and make life from it... among other things," I muttered, smoke winding down my body as my body shrank down, black hair lightening into brown and curling away into wisps of smoke. The old man froze, gazing at me in my male form with a glazed look in his eyes.
"...The miracle field..those rioters who left us alone, Mikasa's kidnappers... Was it all you?"
I shrugged, contemplating the people down below me. Bloodied bandages bright and glaring to my eyes. My eyes flickered to the bandage on Pokerface's head and felt a strange golden warmth curl in on my chest. A slow horrible truth dawned on me.
"I didn't... did I?"
"You didn't what? Eren?"
I can feel a sacrifice on him. What did he sacrifice? When did he- What the hell is happening? I didn't give him anything though, did I? I can't remember. WHY CAN'T I? Am I turning mad like the gods of the red fields? But why? I'm not one of them! Those gods who forget themselves in their torment of humans in the blood and the -bloodandthefleshandthepoweroftheirlaststrugglingbreathsastheyaretuggedintotheblack!WhosuccumbtotheirbloodyangerandI' -
"Eren! Calm down!" shouted Oldman's voice, snapping me out of the blinding fog.
"I make deals," I turned to face the man kneeling by my side with a fearful expression on his face, "I take something that a mortal finds valuable then give them something equal to it. Like Armin gave me tribute of food that he needed to keep you safe. But I don't remember taking sacrifice from Pokerface. I can feel it though! I don't know what's happening to me!" I sought an answer to my terrified questions from the surprised face of the mortal in front of me as he ...just...stared back...
Oh... mortal...how would he know when I don't? I thought to myself. Damn how can I expect him to-
A hand came out in front of me, holding something out for me.
"You make deals right?" The Oldman asked. In his hand there was a lock of blond hair, it's scent almost faded but still distinct.
"Armin..." I whispered, staring at the lock of hair with wide eyes. "You would sacrifice this?"
"What- what would I get for this?" The man asked in a hesitant voice.
"Many things," I returned, looking up from the hair to his face "I am already sworn to protect you and those humans that I can from the Titans."
"Okay... I want for you to listen to me. Listen to those who care for you. No matter how lost you think you are, even if you cannot talk or hear or think, you must come back to them, listen and think again."
My breath came out long and heavy from my chest and I faintly smiled at the man before me.
"Humans... You just keep surprising me," I muttered.
"Deal?" The man asked, hesitantly placing the lock of his Grandson's hair on my open hand, frail fingers trailing over it. I leaned forward quickly, kissing his cheek and taking the sacrifice.
"Your request is granted," I smiled largely, hugging him to my chest, much to his surprise, as the warm glow of the promise filled us both. After a moment he returned the hug.
"You scared me there little one," he told me, ruffling my hair before quickly freezing, probably remembering he wasn't noogying a human.
"It's fine, I'm fine," I told him with a smile as I pulled back from his hug. The smile faded quickly as I looked down again at the bloodied form of Pokerface, swinging my legs over the edge as I peered down at him. "...I owe him too,"
"I don't think you should tell him, or the others yet. They aren't likely to react well," he warned me, sitting down next to me, his legs dangling over the branch edge next to mine. I could feel his eye travelling over my youthful face. "It's so strange to see such old eyes staring out of a child's face."
"Not a child," I muttered "I was fifteen, a man."
The Oldman jolted as I spoke and began to say something but I forestalled them with my hand, black smoke swirling up around me as my face broadened and stretched, hair stretched out and settled into long black locks and my arms swirled with black ink.
"That better?" I asked with a roll of my eyes as my older female form settled back around me.
"...Eren, what was that you sa-"
"The large woman is waking up," I interrupted him, pointing at the other branch as I stood up and shot off my cables. As I landed I heard the old man hurriedly whispering a warning.
"Whatever you do don't give her the name 'large woman'."
I rolled my eyes, ignoring him as I approached the woman and a human who was helping prop her up. The woman was struggling against the man, letting out panicked yelps, still half in her dreams.
"Let me," I told the man who quickly scuttled back as I knelt down in front of the woman.
Her eyes were unfocused as she continued to twist in my unmoving arms. Her pale amber skin was scarred with red and white burns, twisting and crossing over her long thin face where her burning tears streamed down.
"Hey there little one," I crooned, bringing my forehead to hers, puffing a hot breathe across her face.
The woman instantly stilled and melted into my arms as I hummed out sweet sounds into her mind.
It took several minutes before she could speak again.
"W-where am I?" She finally spoke, "I was... oh god! I was eaten! I fell down its throat! I saw my- Oh- how- how am I alive?" She exclaimed in shock and confusion, agitation building up again only to fade away as I cradled her face in my palms.
"I cut open the Titan and pulled you and the white haired woman out," I said, nodding down at other woman beside her. "There was a man too but he lost too much blood."
There was a gasp from the man who attending the injured but I ignored him, focusing on the shocked woman instead. Slowly I breathed in and frowned.
"You better get some rest," I told her quietly before pulling back, allowing her to see me properly, her eyes focused then widened as she seemed to recognise me. "Green Eyes?"
"Why does everyone know that nickname?" I asked the Oldman bemusedly.
"What else do people have to talk about? You're too modest Er- uh Eury," The Oldman chuckled and shook his head.
I snorted. I wasn't modest at all. Hello, God? There wasn't anything to be modest about. I turned and looked out at the darkening forest. It was probably time for me to head out soon. I made to leave but was stopped as a pair of hands found mine.
"Thank you. Oh god, thank you, thank you," the woman was crying, pulling my hand to her cheek.
"Uhh... Right..." I turned to look at the Oldman who shrugged, eyes dancing with amusement at my discomfort. "You're- uh- you are welcome mother," I told the woman who blinked rapidly at her name.
"Mother?" She asked in surprise.
"Oldman, make sure she rests. The infant seems to be fine but she should still take some time off her duties."
"Don't say things like that," the Oldman chided me with a red face. "She's not that- uh I mean to say-"
"No, she's with child," I corrected "she smells like she's uh- what's the word- a mother to be. She needs to eat more and it will become clear." With that I smiled at the look of shock on their faces, shot off my gear and waved goodbye to them.
While Oldman sorted all that out I'd go get a head start on finding those carriages everyone was so stressed about. It was probably dark enough by now, I doubted many of the Titans would still be up.
It was early morning, just before dawn by the time I came back to the eaves of the forest, pulling the one undamaged waggon I could find behind me by hand, irritably battling my hair as the wind yet again threw it in front of my face. I never seemed to notice its length when fighting or leaping through the air. I only noticed when there was less to distract me and the wind thought it was a fucking good idea to blow it into my mouth. This was one of the reasons I preferred my form with short hair. It got a bit better though as I made my way through the trees, weaving around jutting roots and tall bushes.
"Green's back!" Called out a voice above me as I passed under a particularly tall tree. In no time there was the sound of many zips and clangs as a group of them surrounded me. Several of them I only recognised vaguely but Barker, Oldman and Flexer were easy to spot as they quickly made their way to the front of the crowd.
"Hunter! You're okay!" Exclaimed Flexer with a relieved grin.
"E-Eury, where have you-?" Started the Oldman only to be interrupted by a furious looking Barker.
"Why did you go like that?! You couldn't have told us you were going out there?"
I froze, wagon straps still tight across my shoulders, as I looked at them with surprise.
"...I forgot," I blurted out only to get several reproving looks. Yeah it was weak and I knew it. The others didn't seem to notice this though, more interested in the contents of the waggon.
"She got all the weapons and gas!" Called out one in a joy filled voice.
"And the food! We've got the food reserves back!" Shouted out another.
"Where are the others, Commander?" a shy looking man asked, not quite meeting my eyes as he hesitantly spoke to me.
"The other caravans were smashed to pieces. I picked up everything that wasn't too broken and put it on this one."
"There's a lot of food here," said the Oldman giving me a knowing look.
Many of the humans didn't realise this but we were running low even before the attack.
Most of the humans were given dried food for their own use to carry, with the wagons holding a back up supply. However the expeditions weren't expected to survive beyond more than a few months at most and the humans supplied food with that in mind. I had realised this after I had joined the higher soldiers but had only told the Oldman. So it was only the Oldman and a few of the higher ranking soldiers who would be able to call me on the fact that there was enough rice and dried beans to last another two months packed tight into the huge wagon. Oldman would see to it that those 'higher ranking soldiers' didn't see this though. I watched with a smirk as he quickly ordered the dry food to be taken out and distributed out for everyone to carry.
"Commander why did you go by yourself, really?" Asked Barker, coming up to stand by my side as we watched everyone scramble to take the food and supplies. I opened my mouth to answer but was quickly cut off as he began to speak again. " Please tell me the truth."
"...I did just forget. But I would have done the same anyway. I'm here to save every person I can from those Titans. I don't want anyone else to die Bar-"
" We don't want you to die though!" He blurted out, staring at me with his huge, round eyes. Taken aback I didn't have a response to this, simply looking at him with raised eyebrows.
"Barker! Go take these sharpening stones up to the main camp," Flexer called out, pulling the suddenly sullen looking boy away from me.
"He's too young..." I found myself saying to Flexer as she came to stand beside me.
"He's sixteen -least that's what he keeps saying..." Flexer murmured, as we watched the boy reluctantly leave. Flexer shook her head and let out a huge sigh. "I hate all this shit, I really do Green Eyes, but I have to agree with him. Just please keep us in the loop next time you want to go off on your lonesome," she said, giving me a strangely serious look. "We can't loose you too."
I nodded ever so faintly and she left, going to help the others.
The distribution of supplies and equipment had to soon be put on hold however as the sun rose and it was no longer safe for people on the ground. I shot my cables into the next tree and sat down on a branch, unconcernedly watching a small Titan as it mournfully scratched at the bark of the thick tree base.
"It seems that the trees are too close together for the bigger ones to get through," came a voice from above. I looked up to see Lady Maniac smiling down from her perch above me as she idly swung her legs back and forth.
"Aren't you supposed to be on guard duty?" I asked her, turning back to stare at the gormless monster below.
"Oh I am. I'm guarding you, sugar. Seems like not everyone's too happy about you, the Oldman and the Mountain taking charge."
"I don't need guarding," I said with a incredulous frown.
"Hell that's what I said. You'd just rip the bollocks off anyone who tried to mess with you," she commented with an approving grin. "Still, beats watching over the 'captain'."
I nodded vaguely before standing up to make my way towards that man's stale, fury stained scent. I needed to find out what was happening about that.
It seemed like many of the others felt the same, as when we got to the main tree there was a large crowd of quietly whispering people in the trees encircling the self appointed captain. Lady Manic and I watched silently from a high branch as the Oldman turned from the man to address everyone.
"Alright! We have several options from this point on! Eury has brought back the food supplies and weapons so we can leave this forest and continue with our effort to reclaim wall Maria as this... man is insistent that we do!" Oldman called out, throwing the man by his side a carefully blank look, "or we can spend a few more days here, regrouping and allowing the injured to recov-"
"We have wasted too much time already!" Shouted out the pompous man giving the Oldman an ominous glare. I was rather surprised to see that he wasn't bound anymore.
"Why isn't he tied up?" I whispered to Lady Manic.
"Your Oldman, seems to think he could convince the bah-stead to share his role of captain so there wouldn't be a "mutiny" and fighting. Too bad it looks like he's trying to backstab him now they've got a big enough crowd," she replied with a smile. Her smirk didn't quite reach her eyes though as she intently watched the scene before us. The Oldman was indeed quickly whispering something to the captain with a deep frown creasing his face.
"Do you all want this self appointed senile old man to lead you?! Or would you rather have the person who was chosen and trusted by the previous squad leader, help you all?!" The man shouted out, ignoring the Oldman's whispers and striding forward with strong, confident movements.
There was a ripple of whispers spreading through the crowd, just louder than the sound of the wind rustling through the trees. No one had decided yet though, simply watching to see how this played out.
"I can lead you correctly like I was trained to-" the man started again, smug smile on his lips as he sensed everyone's unease, only to be interrupted as Barker walked up to him, radiating righteous fury.
"Lead? You can't even lead sheep! I heard you planning with your men earlier. When we leave you want to send out a group of us off first as Titan bait so YOU can get a head start on them!" The young boy spat.
"Uh-oh," Lady Manic murmured in a sing-song voice, eyes focused on the vein popping out of the man's forehead.
"I never- how- how dare you spread such insolent lies!? Insubordination!"
Then Barker did something stupid. He kept on going.
"You're not the commander! You wanted to kill our Green Eyes! You can't lead us! You can't save us! You couldn't even save the last leader!" He all but screamed.
I was moving even before the vile man drew his blade out, his anger overwhelming all common sense. I didn't notice Lady Manic shooting after me, all I noticed was the arch of the blade and that no one had moved to pull the boy out of the way. Gasps rippled out from around me as I held the boy tight into my body, my left forearm inches from his face with the metal blade deeply embedded, a trickle of black blood weeping down my arm.
I stared at my arm with wide eyes. It cut me. How did it cut me?
"COMMANDER!"
"You tried to kill a boy?!"
"You attacked Green?!"
"How dare you!?"
"Is Green Eyes alright?!"
The sound of shouts and insults and anger filled the forest as I looked up from the blade to meet the man's eyes, staring at my black blood then at me with pure terror. Then our gaze was shattered as a blade lodged itself through the man's throat, splattering me with blood.
Lady Manic drew back her blade and started cleaning it with a mild mannered look as the man collapsed in a soft fountain of his own body fluids. You could have heard a dropped pin in the silence.
"C'mon, who else didn't want to do that?" She asked the crowd in a no nonsense tone.
"Lady..." Murmured Oldman with a strange mix of a disappointed sigh and soft warning.
"Ooh you give me shivers when you call me Lady," she winked at him.
The people around us were starting to wake up from the shock now and quickly the Oldman started addressing them again. By this point I had stopped listening though, eyes glued to the deep cut on my arm as I numbly released my grip on Barker. Barker seemed numb as well, simply stating into the space where my arm had been moments ago, before suddenly snapping out of it, spinning around and ripping off his coat to stem the bleeding. He didn't even seem to notice the colour of my blood in his frenzy. Either that or he didn't care as he stared at me with wide terrified eyes, repeatedly asking if I was okay then calling for help.
I wasn't listening. It cut me. Metal can cut me? I had never let a blade touch me before. I always thought I would be invulnerable to it like I was with everything else.
"Eren come back to me."
I blinked twice and looked up at the worried face of Oldman as his blue eyes repeatedly flickered from my arm to my face.
"You need to let them know you're okay," he whispered again, "I'm sorry but we need you. Help us."
I nodded numbly and stood up with his help, just noticing Barker stand up with me, his hands glued to my arm as he put pressure on my injury...
My... injury...
I shook my head sharply, think about that later. For now I had to stop these idiot Humans from panicking. I almost felt like laughing at the absurdity of it all- me trying to stop humans from panicking?- but the sharp sting in my arm cut that feeling to the quick. I stood tall, looking around the fearful angry crowds. Among these humans were a few who had been in the riots, I had recognised their fearful angry stench a long time ago, and I could smell it once more. Right... I had to be smart about this.
"All you lot! Shut the hell up!" I called out.
Brilliant Eren. .. I could feel Far Eyes and Oldman slam their heads into their hands behind me as Flexer and Fury incredulously goggled at me from the side. Surprisingly they did quiet down though, watching me with palatable surprise as I tried to think of what the hell to say to these humans to stop them from going nuts and go on a lynching spree.
"What is your shouting and arguing going to do? Look here! This... This is the first time I've been hurt since we got out here. Not one time before have I been caught by Titan teeth or by another person's blade. Do you all know why that is?" No one answered me but I could see the hopeful trepidation splayed openly on many of their faces, hearts on their sleeves as I belted out my words. "It's not because I am strong. It's not because I am fast. And it is NOT because I am without fear! It is because of those I have around me! I am alive because I have help when I fight the enemy. That is why all of you are alive after almost four months! FOUR months! ...It's about fucking time for some introductions!"
I waved my uninjured arm for those around me to step forwards, and without hesitation they did.
"This here is Barker patching up my arm, bloody fantastic at distracting Titans so others can kill them without getting hurt. This is Lady Manic- I have seen her pull a person right out of a Titan's mouth and has more kills than I can count." I shouted out, clapping my hand on Lady Manic's shoulder as she gave me a feral grin.
"This mountain of a man here, you named him Far Eyes because he can see for miles and let's us know when Titans are coming, he's deadly with a blade and can go on using it as long as a horse can run! Fury and Flexer here are as deadly as my blades and will fuck up any Titan that so much as looks at them. And finally this here is Oldman. You wanna know why I call him Oldman?"
The silence was tantalising as I stopped and looked around, every single eye was on me. I couldn't stop yet, I had to keep going.
"Because he knows more than any young man ever could! He is the center! He tells us where to go and when to attack. He has saved lives with his judgement, time and time again!" I shouted out, voice echoing through the white, snow dusted forest.
"There are more though. More people who have helped try to keep those who ride beside them alive. There are too fucking many to name and isn't that amazing?! Now I don't know every one of you yet but I do know I don't want to loose any more of you. I made a promise to save as many people as I can! And I will do it again HERE AND NOW! But I need your help! Will you help me? Help those beside you?"
"...yes," came several voices.
"Will you help?!" I repeated again, louder this time.
"Yes!" Shouted more and more of them.
I grinned, eyes wide as I looked around at them as many of them, almost all, started to shout out yes one after another.
"Alright! Oldman and Far Eyes here have some ideas of what we're gonna do next! Anyone got anything they wanna say or ideas you wanna add put up their hand and Far Eyes will see you!"
I nodded to Oldman and Far Eyes as they stepped forward to address the masses, Old Man nodding at me with a grateful smile. I stepped back and let Fury and Barker pull me down to sit, listening as Oldman told everyone his plan of recuperating and looking for food and water supplies then scouting the forest eves to determine what to do next.
"Good speech there, knew you had it in you," said Fury, trying to look at my arm.
"Really? I was just talking out my ass for most of it," I joked, pulling the arm in closer to my body so she couldn't see it the black stained material covering it.
"I'll take her to the healer," said Lady Manic, standing over us, meeting Barker's glare steadily until he faintly conceded and nodded.
"You two, keep an eye on everyone and protect the Oldman. There will be some idiots who didn't listen to me," I muttered to them as I softly pried Barker's hands off my arm.
"Th- thanks Green," said Barker quietly. He smiled, small but sweet, before turning to Lady manic and thanking her too.
"Everyone here's becoming the biggest saps I swear," muttered Lady Manic as we shot off our gear and left the tree.
Pokerface and Whitehair were awake when we got there, sat next to each other and talking in low voices.
"Hey Pokerman! You missed the sweetest speech by our little Berserker. She almost made me cry."
Pokerface turned to look at Lady Manic with a faint frown before turning to look at me with an unreadable expression.
"...you okay Pokerface?" I asked, my voice oddly quiet as I stood before them.
"...no. I've lost an eye, a hand and my foot."
The silence stretched out between us. I opened my mouth then closed it.
"Well, this is awkward!" Lady Manic proclaimed, clapping her hands together. "Pokerface get over yourself and don't kill her. Berserker, I repeat the same." And with that she flew off.
"She's a character," said Whitehair giving me a feeble smile, "I'll leave you two to talk but um- can I just say- thanks- that is- Thanks for saving my life," she spoke to me with a nervous but grateful tone as she pushed herself up with her one remaining arm and wobbled faintly down the tree branch towards the pregnant woman.
"... Can I sit?" I asked Pokerface quietly, pointing to the free space beside him.
His shoulders lifted a fraction of a centimetre in a 'if-you-must' shrug.
"You seem to be more in control than when I last saw you," he intoned quietly, looking out at the forest as a small Titan far far below harmlessly weaved through the trees.
"I- yes. I don't know what happened there, I can't really remember much."
"Oh," he simply said.
"I... did I do this to you? Is it my fault?" I suddenly blurted out, my eyes painfully wide as I looked at him. Pokerface slowly turned to look at me but didn't answer, instead his eyes trailed downwards. It was only then that he noticed my hand clamped tightly over my arm, his body sharply twisting to look at it.
"That guy who wanted to be captain," I explained as he gazed at it steadily.
"So you can get hurt..." He muttered to himself.
"It- it will probably heal fine," I said as he looked down at my arm with a strange expression.
Truth be told it was probably already half healed, I just hadn't dared look.
I had been hurt before. It wasn't often but it had happened, mainly when defending what was mine from other gods.
But metal wasn't a god, how could it-
I suddenly snapped out of my daze as I realised Pokerface was saying something.
"-y did he attack you?"
"I- oh why did he attack me? He didn't, he attacked Barker, tried to fucking kill him and I got in the way." I looked up from my injury as I felt Pokerface scrutinizing me.
"...This isn't your fault," he eventually said, waving at his injuries, faint bitter smile turning the corners of his lips ever so slightly.
"...That's the biggest smile I've seen on you Pokerface," I found myself grinning softly at him.
"Don't get used to it," he returned before looking back out at the forest, watching intently as a fat rock dove whistled past us. I continued to stare at him. I could tell he was lying. I could feel the glow of sacrifice bleeding off of him. I wondered why he didn't tell me the truth.
"What one thing do you want the most in the world?" I asked him in what I hoped was a mild tone.
"...are we talking money and fame? You can keep it," he murmured with what was presumably sarcasm (it didn't translate well in his monotone), his eyes glazed as he stared into empty space.
"Not something you don't want. Something you want more than anything," I repeated, trying to keep the insistence out of my voice.
"...my foot and hand back to normal would be nice," he commented, a faint trace of irritation in his tone.
Not enough. It still isn't equal.
"What else?"
He huffed out a breath and turned to look at me again, his remaining eye narrowed and shrewd.
"For you to stop lying so much."
I blinked several times then slowly reached forwards and took his unresisting damaged hand and raising it to my face.
"Granted," I murmured before placing a quick kiss on it. The man frowned at me as he quickly pulled his hand back.
"I'm gonna go out for a bit, tell the others and give the soon Mother this," I told him, pulling an apple out of the shadows of my short cropped coat and passing it to him.
"Where are you going?" He asked me, gazing strangely at the apple.
Stop lying so much.
"I'm going to go save everyone."
