The next day, on my way to see Captain Ross, I ran into Emil Skoda.
"Lucy." Emil's deep voice stopped me short. Emil knocked me a bit off balance. For the past few years, we had been in an on-again-off-again relationship. Currently we were off.
"Emil." I turned, smiling.
"Lucy, what're doing here?" He looked around, then back at me.
"I have an appointment, in Major Case." I offered, thinking that he may well have already known what I was doing there. He was pretty tight with the DAs office, and with NYPD.
"You look, well you look beautiful." He smiled at me, stepping closer to me. I held my ground, even though my breath shortened a bit. The attraction between us was undeniable.
I was the one who had asked for some distance. I realized, as he stood there, that perhaps he was more attracted to me because I had pulled away. Up until this time, he was usually the one to make the break.
"Thank you." I continued to stand, looking at him.
"I should go." I gestured toward the elevator; I did not like to be late.
"Right." He said, but he didn't move.
"I should go." I repeated, realizing I would have to be the one to turn and break the closeness. So, I did, and I walked toward the elevator, and I did not look back. I could feel him watching me walk away.
When the elevator doors closed, and I was alone, I took a deep breath. He told me I looked beautiful. I looked down across my body. I was wearing a navy pant suit, full legged, tailored jacket, white camisole. My hair was twisted away from my face, but I could feel that one of my molasses colored curls had escaped near my ear. I wasn't going for beautiful, I was going for professional. I thought that in as much as Emil was an excellent, trained psychiatrist, he was also a man. And, I knew that part of why I looked beautiful to him, was that currently I was trying to make myself unattainable to him.
I was frustrated that Emil could put me off balance. I found him to be handsome and smart. But he could also be arrogant. At times, he could be dismissive of me, of my opinions. The more established my practice became, the more sensitive to his arrogance I seemed to be. So lately, I realized that I needed something new, something a bit different.
The elevator came to a halt. Someone smart, but perhaps a bit humble in terms of his intelligence, like Bobby Goren. The thought popped into my head, and I almost missed stepping off the elevator before the doors closed again.
I played with the image of Bobby Goren in my mind as I walked toward the Captain's office. I was prepared to make my recommendation to the Captain. I had a good amount of experience evaluating the fitness of officers. And, I had good success with my evaluations. So, I knew that my opinion was respected. But what was my subconscious doing to me… comparing Bobby Goren to Emil Skoda. I was personally, deeply involved with Emil; whereas I had only met with Bobby Goren in a professional capacity a very limited number of times. So what was I doing comparing Bobby Goren to a man I was sleeping with?
I reached forward to knock lightly on the Captain's door. I had my hand up in the air when the door was yanked open from the inside and a petite brunette stepped out and crashed into me. I knew immediately, instinctively that it was Detective Alexandra Eames. She looked at me for a moment, murmured an "excuse me" and stalked across the squad. I watched her for a moment, as I heard the Captain calling me inside. I wondered about Bobby's description of her, about his feelings for her. And, again I caught myself thinking about Bobby Goren in an unprofessional way.
A/N: So, I have this thing for J.K. Simmons and his sexy deep voice. So, if Lucy Jones is a shrink, maybe she would know Skoda...
