Several minutes had passed when Rose pulled up in front of the restaurant Kanaya instructed her to meet her at. It was a rather small place with an open air patio. She had gotten out of her car to discover Kanaya had already been seated, and she quickly walked over to join her.
"Sorry about earlier." Rose instantly apologized as she took her seat.
"It's-" before Kanaya could even reply, the waitress came by to ask Rose and Kanaya for their drinks.
"Water will be fine." Rose spoke.
"Same for me, thank you." Kanaya replied then watched as the waitress wandered off to fetch their beverages. When she was gone, she turned back to Rose, "Please, don't worry, it is entirely fine that such a thing happened. You need to help your patients, correct?"
Rose nodded and opened her menu, "Thank you go understanding."
The other woman was silent for a moment as she watched Rose. She appeared to be a little unsettled, her body language was odd, different from the Rose that she had grown accustomed to. Something clearly was probing at her mind.
Kanaya released a small sigh, "She was the girl you have been racking you brain over, isn't she?" the woman questioned, staring at Rose from across the table.
Before Rose could answer, the waitress had returned with their drinks, "Do you need any more time to look over the menus?"
They both shook their head and took their orders. They had been to the place before and were both aware as to what they did and did not care for from the restaurant. They waitress smiled and took down their orders before taking their menus away, running off in another direction.
Once again they were alone, and Rose looked over at Kanaya, "Yes, that was her."
Kanaya closed her eyes and nodded, resting her chin on top of her hands. "So that's what's troubling you, isn't it?"
Rose was quiet and took a sip of her water, "I never mentioned that it was troubling me."
The other woman opened her eyes once more and smiled. Her eyes looked so soft and kind, "I know you refrained from telling me, but it doesn't mean that I didn't care to take notice." She leaned back a bit and crossed her legs, "What did she come to talk to you about? It seemed like it might have troubled you."
A smirk played across Rose's lips, "Are you suddenly going to start analyzing everything about me? Isn't that supposed to be my job?"
Kanaya shrugged, a smile still upon her face, "What can I say? Perhaps I have picked up a bit on your habits, your mannerisms. Now, what seems to be the problem?"
Rose couldn't help but smile as she laid one hand atop the other, setting them on top of the table. "I think you are the only one capable of seeing through me like this." She let out a small sigh then looked up at Kanaya, "It's just strange, I feel as though I almost can see myself in the girl."
Kanaya turned her head to the side, out of both curiosity and interest. "Oh?" she asked, "What makes you say that."
She frowned in response, "The things she tells me, they are so strikingly similar." The memory form before flashed through Rose's mind and her eyes grew grim, "Sometimes I want to tell her how it feels, how I can understand her pain, and tell her what to do, how what she is going to try is such a mistake, how she will regret it all-"
She stopped suddenly when she felt Kanaya's hand upon hers. Rose looked into Kanaya's eyes and didn't say another word. Kanaya was frowning, her expression looked as though she almost pitied both Rose and the girl for having to feel this way about it all.
"I don't know the feeling." She whispered to Rose, "I never dealt with the ridicule when I was that age, I only dealt with the heartbreak and I remember how it was terrible. But, I never went through the issues of my life choices that people here seem to be subjected to, so it's hard for me to understand how this girl must feel, how you must feel..."
Kanaya leaned a bit across the table, brushing Rose's cheek with her hand softly. Kanaya could see the pain that she was keeping locked up behind her lavender eyes and it hurt her as well. "However, I know that you are strong, I know you will tell her the right thing to do."
Rose smiled at Kanaya in response and thanked her in a hushed tone. Kanaya retreated back to her chair afterwards, but still kept her hand on top of Rose's. Kanaya did not say anything else, she just smiled at her partner, hoping that her words had made some influence. And it appeared they did, she could notice Rose seemed to have eased up a bit.
"Here you are." The waitress interrupted again. Rose was quick to retreat her hand from under Kanaya's and place it on her lap before the waitress could look back again and set their plates in front of the two women.
"Thank you." Rose spoke as the waitress smiled and walked off.
Kanaya didn't say anything. She just sat there frozen for a moment, staring at her hand, which sat with abandon on top of the table. It laid there for a moment before she slowly slipped it back into her lap. She didn't comment, she wouldn't ever comment. This wasn't the first time Rose did something like this.
The woman remained silent as she lifted her fork, bringing her food to her mouth and chewing it slowly as thoughts blew through her mind. The thoughts felt dull, lifeless, but they continued to remain, like a heavy sack of bricks that just sat there, not doing anything but couldn't be moved. Rose always did this in public, she always refrained from showing Kanaya any affection. It honestly irritated the alien girl, but more so it just upset her. She refused to comment on it, however, because she was far too considerate of Rose's feelings to ever speak out.
She was well aware as to how Rose couldn't be comfortable with it. Even though she knew Rose loved her, she knew that she just wouldn't be able to show it in public. Unlike Kanaya, Rose had grown up in a society where being with the same gender was uncommon, and could often ruin things like social lives, or even business in Rose's case. The thing hardly mattered to Kanaya, but she knew that Rose was incredibly cautious about every interaction they had that wasn't behind closed doors.
The only time she ever held Kanaya's hand was when it was under the table, or in a theater where no one could see. The only time she graced Kanaya's lips with a kiss was when everyone else was turned away. The thought frustrated Kanaya, because more than anything, she just wanted Rose to be open with her. She wanted to feel like they were a real couple somewhere besides at their home.
But Rose wouldn't do that. She was fully aware.
Kanaya let out a sigh before taking another bite of her food, only to soon after set the fork down. She had completely lost her appetite with all these thoughts weighing heavy on her shoulders.
Rose looked up at her, "Kanaya? Is something troubling you?"
"No," she smiled up at Rose, "I just realized that I am not too terribly hungry after all. I feel rather bad actually to be wasting the meal."
Rose frowned in response, "Well, I would hate for you to grow hungry later. Ask the waitress if you can have it to go and you can just take it with you."
Kanaya nodded, "Yes, that sounds like a good idea."
The rest of the meal just involved rather light conversation. Nothing really relating back to Rose and her situation towards the patient, nor did Kanaya bring up how she felt about their displays of affection towards one another. In fact, the two of them seemed to push their own troubles to the back of their minds, in order to make the meal more pleasant and enjoyable.
Kanaya ended up talking about her clothing line a bit, and how she was rather thrilled to know they enjoyed her designs so much. She mentioned as to how they would be appearing in one of the many high end fashion magazines that seemed to be filling the market lately. They guaranteed to her how they would be talking to stores, possibly getting her design into the retail market.
Rose couldn't help but continue to congratulate her throughout the meal on her good job. She was actually rather proud of her accomplishments.
When their meal finished, Kanaya took her packaged up food and Rose picked up her purse, leaving the money for the bill on the table and walking out with Kanaya.
The two walked to Rose's car first, standing outside of it.
"I'll see you when I get home." Rose spoke, unlocking the car door.
"Alright." she replied with a smile, "Try not to be too late, alright?"
"Don't worry, I won't be." Rose replied as she opened her car door.
Kanaya watched her as she was about to get into the car. "Oh, Rose?"
"Hm?" Rose asked, turning back to her.
Kanaya was still standing there, then with her free hand, she placed it behind Rose's neck to pull her in for a kiss.
However, Rose's reaction was the last thing she had wanted.
The girl had retreated, placing a hand on Kanaya's chest to push her back gently, as if forcing her away in a considerate manner. "Not here, Kanaya." she spoke in a hushed tone.
Kanaya frowned, then let go of Rose and stepped back, watching the blonde get in her car. She saw a small wave from behind the windshield, and she waved back before watching Rose drive off.
She stood there for a moment, letting out a small sigh, feeling a tear trail down her cheek. She wiped it and saw how some of the peach make up came off with it and frowned once more. Kanaya let out another sigh and walked over to a nearby trash can, dumping her packaged food inside of it. Her appetite had completely vanished.
