This next one shot happens in the middle of Third Time's the Charm. If you read the trigger warning on that one shot and chose not to read it, then I'll summarize it quickly here so you can follow along:
Garrus and Jane want a baby. They chose to go the route of artificial insemination. James is their donor. The first attempt doesn't work-but that's normal even when you're using sex instead of medical intervention. Attempt number two takes. YAY! Jane is pregnant. Sadly, she loses the baby around the 10 week mark. Attempt number three is successful and that is the baby she is carrying throughout my other fiction-Interspecies Awkwardness.
For those who did read Third Time's the Charm, this would happen between when she says "Third time's the charm..." and the next paragraph.
Garrus was sitting at the table in the mess, picking at his "dinner", when Ashley sat down across from him.
"Didn't your mother ever tell you not to play with your food?" she teased.
"Does that still apply if the slop in question isn't edible?" Garrus lifted his fork, and they both watched as the bluish-grey "food" slid off the tines before landing back on his tray with a squishy sounding slap.
"Oh nasty!" Ashley's nose wrinkled up as she stared at his tray. "You'd think being married to the ship's Captain would get you better rations."
"It does. Except we've been away from port longer than planned and I ran out," Garrus explained as he shoved the chunk of dextro based paste around some more. "So it's back to dextro-whatever-this-is."
"I'd go hungry," Ashley declared as she cut into her own dinner.
"I tried." Garrus shoved the tray away. "I can't stomach another bite."
Hey, Ash, you busy? Joker's voice came over the intercom as Garrus pushed away from the table and headed over to the trash bins to scrape his tray.
"I'm eating dinner," she said as she cut another bite free.
Put it in the fridge Joker responded. Vega just radioed in. He wants you suited up and ready to leave when Cortez gets back with the shuttle. Looks like you're taking the Commander's place on this mission.
"Why?" Garrus asked concerned as to why Jane was coming back. She didn't believe in sending others to do her job. He headed toward the main battery while Joker was speaking.
Don't know. Didn't ask. Vega had that "don't mess with me" tone going. I'm just relaying the message.
"EDI," Garrus turned his head toward the AI's console as he spoke. "Can you patch me through to Vega?"
"Of course, Garrus," EDI answered. "You're connected."
"…You are not fine." Garrus heard Vega growl.
"I am too," snapped Jane, followed by a gasping gagging noise.
"What's going on?" Garrus asked. The gagging noise started to sound harsher, closer to retching.
"Dios!" Vega shouted.
"What's going on?" Garrus asked again, his patience thinning with every second he heard Jane gag and retch in the background.
"Lola's on her way back to the ship to be checked out by Chakwas," Vega explained, speaking louder as Jane protested in the background.
"You don't get to order me around," Jane growled. Her voice was thin, breathy, and weak.
"Lola," Vega sighed. "You just puked on my boots."
"It's just a little nausea," Jane explained. "It'll pass in a minute."
"How do you know?" Vega's tone said he didn't buy what she was trying to sell. Not for a second.
"Because it always does," Jane shot back.
"Always does?" Garrus and Vega said at the same time, though Jane could only hear James.
"Yeah"
Garrus wished he could see Jane, but EDI had only connected him to James' radio, not to the camera on the man's hard suit. Was she pale? Sweating? Putting on a brave face for her crew? Damn it, he was starting to worry. Jane didn't like doctors but she rarely put off going to see Chakwas if something was really wrong.
"When did she start vomiting?" Garrus asked.
"She started looking green around the gills when we hit atmo," James explained.
"Who are you talking to?" Jane asked, suddenly realizing that James was talking to someone other than herself.
"Get in the shuttle, Lola," James growled.
"It's Garrus isn't it? You're tattling on me to my husband? You traitor!"
"It's all because we care," Vega's tone held no room for argument as he barked out orders. "Rodriguez, get her in the shuttle."
"You're going to be cleaning the bathrooms for the next month!" Jane threatened. Her voice was getting further and further away as she ranted. "With your tooth brush!"
"Get her back to the ship, Estaban," James shouted over Jane. "Ashley should be ready to leave when you get there."
Garrus heard the shuttle door shut with a clank followed by the roar of the thrusters as it took off and then everything was quiet. For a moment he was afraid he'd lost the connection to Vega but then the man spoke.
"She's on her way back to you," Vega sighed. "Don't know if I should apologize for that or not."
"Don't apologize to me, you're the one she's going to skin alive," Garrus was shocked that he could joke when he was so worried about Jane. "Tell me what happened?"
"I don't know. It was almost as though she got air sick, but she's never done that before. She started to look pale and was panting a little as we came through atmo," Vega explained. "Then when we landed she scrambled out of the shuttle, doubled over, and started dry heaving."
"She's never had trouble before," Garrus repeated Vega's earlier observation, puzzled by Jane's predicament. "Was the landing rough?"
"Smooth as glass," Vega said, the shrug obvious in his voice. "But don't tell Estaban I said that. He'll get a big head."
"Garrus?" EDI's orb popped up at her console next to the door to the main battery. "The Commander is asking to be connected to you."
"Hey, Vega, I'll.."
"Yeah, I heard. Take care of your girl."
"Garrus?" It was Jane's voice in Garrus' ear now.
"Hey," he drawled. "heard you lost your lunch on Vega's boots. Great aim."
"Yeah, yeah," Jane sighed. "Listen, I need you to go get something from the loft then meet me in the med bay."
"You promise you're going to go to the med bay? You're not sending me on some errand so you can slip back into the shuttle and go back down to the planet are you?"
"Garrus!" Jane gasped. "When have I ever done that?"
The lack of response from Garrus gave her all the answer she needed. He still hadn't forgiven her for sending him to check in with Victus in London, even if it had been for his own good. If he'd been with her, he would've been hurt when Harbinger hit the pile of makos and then he wouldn't have been able to save her. But, of course, none of that mattered to her husband. He believed that he could've stopped everything that happened to her had he been with her. He didn't understand she did what she did for his sake. She knew him too well; if he'd been there he would've done something rash, something stupidly heroic. He would've gotten his fool self killed and the mere thought of that made her sick. Whether she lived or died hadn't mattered to her, only knowing that he was alive mattered. And to some small degree, it had been insurance; a reason to come back and a face to fight for that she knew was waiting for her after everything was over.
"Okay, fine!" she sighed. "I promise I will be in the med bay when you get there. If you don't trust me you can send Traynor to the cargo hold to escort me up."
"What do you need me to get?" he asked. He couldn't think of a thing she needed from their room so urgently that it couldn't wait until after she was checked out, but he'd play along if that was what it took to get her into the med bay.
"A pair of my yoga pants, a t-shirt, and the black box in my bedside table," Jane listed the items she needed. "Oh! And a fresh pair of socks, please."
"Clothing and the black box," Garrus reiterated.
"Yes, please," Jane's voice got breathy again and she started to cough. "I'm going to disconnect now so you don't have to listen to me heave in your ear."
"Clothing. Black box. Clothing. Black box," Garrus chanted quietly to himself as he rode the elevator from the crew deck up to the loft.
He kept muttering to himself as he made his way through their room. The clothing was easy to find. He knew what she preferred and where she kept everything in her drawers, but the black box was proving to be a challenge. He'd never seen a black box in her bedside table in all the times she'd had him get something out for her. What was in this box that she had to have with her?
He pulled the drawer in question all the way out and stared down at its contents: lotion, nail clippers, file, two bottles of nail polish—one black and one red—lip gloss, half a dozen hair ties and more bobby pins than he could count but no black box. Confused, he shoved the drawer back in, hearing it thunk against the back of the table.
Maybe she meant the other bedside table. They had both been hers at one point. Maybe the box was in the table he was using. He walked around the bed and pulled that drawer out, but there was no black box in that one either. It was then, as he was staring down at this drawer, that it dawned on him and he raced back over to the other drawer. Using his hand, he measured the depth of the table then pulled the drawer out and measured the depth of the drawer. Sure enough, as he'd expected, the drawer wasn't as deep as the table.
"What are you hiding, my dear mate?" he muttered to himself as he felt along the back wall of the drawer for a way to release the false back.
It took some prying, but eventually he got the back to move enough that he could get a talon in between it and the side of the drawer. From there, it was easy to get the false back pulled free. Sure enough, behind that piece of wood was a small, matte black box. He pulled the box out and stared down at it in his hands; debating whether or not to open it.
Giving in to his curiosity, and figuring that their 'no secrets' rule applied to this as well, Garrus decided to open the box. Just for a quick peek, he told himself. He wouldn't move anything in the box; he just wanted to see what was so precious that she hid it from everyone, even him. He turned the box over in his hands, looking for a latch to release or button to press that would open the box, but found none. The box was completely sealed; it didn't even show a seam where it came together.
"What in the…?" Garrus muttered, staring at the box, perplexed.
"Garrus?" Dr. Chakwas' voice came over the intercom. "Jane is in the infirmary, we're just waiting for you."
"On my way," he called. He scooped up her clothing and the box and headed back toward the elevator.
He paced in the elevator as he waited for it to arrive at the crew deck, his curiosity, and frustration, growing with every second that ticked by. What was so damn important that she hid it from everyone including him? And how the hell had she gotten it into a container with no obvious seal? As the elevator slowed to a stop on the third level, he resigned himself to the fact that he wouldn't have an answer to this mystery until Jane opened the box herself.
"You tried opening it, didn't you?" Jane was smirking at him as he walked into the med-bay.
"How'd you know? EDI?" Garrus was a little embarrassed by how easily he was found out.
"I did not tell the Commander of your attempts to open the box," EDI spoke over the intercom. "Joker said you would want that kept a secret."
"Thanks, EDI," Garrus deadpanned before turning his attention to Jane.
"What's in there?" he asked as he handed the clothing and box over to Jane.
"Something I never expected I would need," Jane answered.
"Well that's not vague at all."
"Sorry, sweetie," Jane sighed, sounding exhausted. "Just let me get changed and then I'll explain."
Garrus paced in the open area near Dr. Chakwas' desk while Jane changed. She had stripped out of her under suit and was pulling her pants on when a timer dinged on one of the counters. Dr. Chakwas got up from her spot at her desk and walked over to the timer, turning it off and studying something before she turned toward Jane with a smile on her face.
"Well that explains a lot," Dr. Chakwas chuckled.
"What explains a lot?" Garrus asked.
"I think I know why Jane has been throwing up," the doctor explained. "But I'd like to verify the results first."
"Do you have any idea what she's talking about?" he asked as he turned toward Jane.
"Maybe," Jane hedged as she hopped onto one of the beds. She looked down at the black box in her hands. "That's why I had you bring this."
She waved her omni-tool over the box and the field shielding it glittered momentarily before the lid opened with a slight hiss. Garrus came over to her side to get a better look at what was inside.
"It's an amp?" he asked confused. What was so important about this amp? Were her biotics making her sick? Was her body having an adverse reaction to the new implants Cerberus gave her?
"Not really," Jane explained, removing the object then setting the box aside. "It's a repression amp."
Jane watched Garrus' face as he tried to process the small amount of information she'd given him. Did he understand human physiology enough to piece together why she'd need this particular amp? When his head cocked to the side, the brow plate over his right eye quirking up, she knew she'd have to explain.
"I got my very first amp when I was eleven," Jane began. "It wasn't top of the line. It was pretty basic, it did just enough so I could control my biotics and would stop flinging things across our quarters. Mom and I were living on star ships at the time and she was afraid I'd tear open a bulk head and space all of us, so she got me fitted for the most basic amp they could make because I was technically still too young for one."
Jane paused for a moment as she gathered her thoughts. The next part of her story wasn't always easy for a non-biotic to understand.
"When I was thirteen I started biotic training. It wasn't much, just an extra course I took twice a week. It was pretty simple. We meditated; learned ways to release stress and modulate our emotions since stress, strong emotions, and spiking hormones can cause biotic outbursts and headaches. You know there are biotics that aren't in the military, right?"
"Of course," Garrus answered. He'd taken a seat next to her on the bed, listening to her story.
"Okay, well, these classes that we took, they were led by both military and civilian biotics. The military biotics were tasked with finding those they thought would be good in the military. It wasn't that they would turn down someone they didn't think had potential with combat biotics—any biotic is good in combat—and they weren't going to force anyone to join up, but they were watching. Apparently, I had potential. I went to a summer camp where we learned how to focus our energy and use it in the field. It was all fun and games, hitting targets and throwing things with shockwave. Charging into big foam cushions—that was fun," Jane stopped to chuckle. "Bet you didn't know I could charge."
"You don't," Garrus responded.
"Because charging into people hurts," Jane explained. "I never could control the barrier portion correctly so when I crash into something I really crash into it." She rubbed her finger over the top ridge of her nose. "My nose used to be crooked because of that. I broke it trying to charge someone. I missed the person and hit the wall next to them."
"Sorry, this is a lot of rambling, but I'm trying to explain this. I think you need to understand what a biotic goes through to understand this," Jane said, holding up the amp for emphasis. "Through camp, through the classes and especially through biotic basic training, they stressed how excessive hormones can upset our biotics. Along with this, they explained the side effects of biotic use during pregnancy," Jane sighed again, fiddling with the amp in her hands. "When the military fits a female biotic with her amp, they also have a repression amp made. We're forced to wear it for a week. We're required to go through boot camp for a whole week without our biotic abilities."
"What good is that?" Garrus asked; reaching for the amp she was worrying between her fingers.
"Fear is a great motivator," Jane handed the amp over to him then wiped her palms on her pants. "After having had a top of the line amp and being able to beat anyone who didn't have biotics at almost everything, it was painful to not have them. It would be like losing an arm. Every time I got into a close quarters situation, I went to throw my attackers off and couldn't. Even worse, my implants would sting and burn from the amp shutting them down when I tried to use my biotics."
"It causes actual pain?" Garrus gawked at the small piece of equipment in his hands.
It looked identical to the amp that Jane wore currently, one he'd run his fingers over so many times when combing his hands through her hair. It was clear and flat on one side with a slight nipple on the other. The male to her port's female if you put it in engineering terms.
"No," Jane shook her head, "not really, at least nothing debilitating. What's more painful is the lack of biotics. You'll understand that part when it happens, though."
"What was the point of making you give them up?" Garrus asked, still confused. She'd said it was to cause fear, but he didn't understand.
"Fear. When you have that much power and then it's yanked away from you, you become scared. You feel weak; helpless. I cried myself to sleep every night that week because of how much pain I was in not being able to defend myself. My body felt drained, my brain felt fuzzy. I swore I would never get pregnant so that I wouldn't have to wear that thing again."
"Oh," Garrus swallowed. She'd said she wanted to try. She'd told him she was ready for the changes to their lives. Was she trying to tell him she had changed her mind?
"Oh," Jane gasped as she watched his face as his mandibles pull tight against his jaw; realizing he'd taken what she said to mean she didn't want to have children. "No, no, no, Garrus! I'm not saying what I think you think I'm saying."
"Huh?" Garrus' head snapped up, his eyes meeting hers. "You're not…what?"
"I'm not saying I don't want to try with you, I'm just trying to explain everything to you. When we decided to try for a baby I knew I would have to wear that amp eventually, and I'm okay with that now. For you, for us, I'm okay with it. I know you'll keep me safe."
"Always," he said, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her closer to his side.
"Though, I may be a raging, emotional beast for a time while I adjust to not having my biotics."
"I'm sure you'll be fine," Garrus chuckled. "But we'll cross that bridge when we come to it."
"That's the thing," Jane said, pulling away from him slightly so she could look up into his face. "We're there."
"What?" Garrus' mandibles went slack, his eyes opening wider as he stared down at Jane. "We're where?"
"What Jane is trying to tell you, Garrus," Dr. Chakwas said calmly, "is that she's pregnant and by the hormone levels, it's time to change her amp."
"You're pregnant?" he gasped, pulling away to stare down at her stomach. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"I was afraid," she admitted softly, avoiding his gaze; choosing to stare at her lap instead where her hands were clenched tightly together. "I didn't want to get both our hopes up again, not after last time."
"Jane," Garrus stooped in front of her, ducking down and pressing his forehead against hers so she had no choice but to look at him.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, "I should've said something sooner. It's just…" she stammered taking a deep breath and continued, "I know how much you suffered last time. How much it hurt you. You tried to be strong for me, and I appreciate that, but you went through just as much as I did and I didn't want that to happen again."
Jane had closed her eyes the moment he put his face in front of hers, refusing to look at him through her whole explanation for keeping this secret. But that was okay, he was patient. He stayed where he was, his forehead pressed to hers, waiting for her to open her eyes. Seconds ticked by, it was almost a full minute before she gave in and opened her eyes slowly.
"Surprise?" she whispered, her bright green eyes filled with both tears of happiness and Garrus couldn't find it in himself to stay upset. He let out a chuckle, his shoulders shaking as he stood up and wrapped his arms around her.
"Surprise," he agreed. "But we are going to talk about this keeping secrets issue. I thought we had no secrets and in the span of an afternoon I've found out you kept two very big ones from me."
"Are you two okay?" the doctor spoke up from her spot next to the counter. "Can we continue?"
"Yeah," Jane sighed. "Let's get this over with."
"I need the amp," Chakwas held her hand out and Garrus walked the amp over to the doctor. "It's been in that box for years," the doctor explained as she dropped it into a vial full of solution. "It needs to be sterilized before it can be put in. While it's doing that, we can verify the results of my earlier test."
The doctor pulled the dreaded ultrasound machine out of her closet of tools and wheeled it over to the bed that Jane was already sitting on.
"Oh God," Jane whispered as she lay back on the bed. Her hands were trembling as she adjusted her clothing so the doctor could work.
"Hey," Garrus whispered, taking up his spot on her other side, holding her hand. "Everything will be fine."
She squeezed her eyes closed as the doctor applied the medical gel to her abdomen. She felt the tear that leaked out of her eye roll down her face and land in the cup of her ear.
"Shh," Garrus was suddenly much closer to her, his free hand stroking her hair as he gently kissed the corner of her eye. She opened her eyes just in time to see him look away toward the screen. "Look," he whispered, nudging her head to turn toward the machine.
She gasped when she focused on the screen. In the center of the grainy image something was fluttering. The doctor pressed a few keys and suddenly the room was filled with the sound of a quickly beating heart. Jane's head snapped back to Garrus when his hand left her hair. He quickly wiped at his eyes, brushing away tears.
"Congrats, you two," the doctor was beaming as she pushed away from the machine, leaving the ultrasound wand with Jane who held it against her stomach so they could keep watching the baby. She crossed the room and retrieved the amp she'd left soaking in sterile solution and was wiping it dry as she returned.
"Looks like it's time to change your jewelry, Commander," the doctor chuckled as Jane reluctantly removed the wand from her stomach and accepted the towel to clean herself with.
"Guess so," she smiled as she sat up. She turned on the bed so her back was to Garrus and pulled her hair up so it was gathered on top of her head instead of over her neck. "Would you do the honors?"
"You want me to remove your amp?" he asked.
"Just twist clockwise then pull," Jane explained. "It's easier to have someone else do it."
Garrus reached out; gently grasping the amp, turned it to the right and pulled it free. Jane let out a hiss, her shoulders tensing just as the amp cleared the port.
"I'm sorry," he apologized, fighting the urge to press his mouth against her neck. He knew that right now, with her port wide open, she was vulnerable. He stepped aside so the doctor could clean the area before inserting the repression amp.
"Ugh!" Jane shuddered as the amp snapped into place.
"Are you okay?" Garrus asked. He walked around her so he could pull her close. "It doesn't hurt does it?"
"It's hard to explain. I just feel odd," Jane laid her head on his chest and wrapped her arms around his waist and that's when he felt it, or more specifically, didn't feel it.
She always had this hum about her, little charges of energy always jolting against him when they touched. Suddenly they were gone. He pulled back, staring down at her for a second before tugging the gloves off that he wore around the ship and pressing a digit against her nose. Normally, he'd feel the charge before his finger made contact, but today there was nothing.
"Completely repressed," Jane explained. "No static electricity. No randomly zapping you when you try to kiss me. I'm just dull, old me."
"Never dull," he said as he leaned down and kissed her, "Never."
