The waitress brought out four plates, two had pancakes on them and the other two had the eggs, grits, and biscuits.

"Do you want me to get you some more coffee or orange juice?" asked the waitress.

"No thank you I'm fine, how about you Allen?"

"Yes more orange juice please!"

"Alright I'll be right back!"

The food looked wonderful. The pancakes were huge and a wonderful golden brown. The butter melted on them and the sweet smell began filling their nostrils. The eggs where perfectly scrambled, a nice pastel yellow color with a tint of brown on the edges. The grits where light and looked like clouds on a plate. And unlike a lot of other places, the biscuits weren't burnt. They were fluffy soft and golden brown.

"Albright here's your orange juice and some syrup! Do you need anything else?"

"No thank you we're alright." Mana said politely. Mana is always telling Allen to be polite and respectful no matter whom he is talking to, be them older, younger, tall, short, thin, not-so-thin, male, female, etc.

"Is your food good Allen?" Mana asked.

"Yes sir!" Allen said while chewing on a bite of pancake. The light fluffy cake was like heaven in his mouth. He slowly chewed savoring the sticky sweet taste. Allen was so hungry that he didn't care about his appearance. He had a trail of syrup running down from the corner of his mouth to his chin. Mana reached across the table with his napkin and wiped off the syrup.

"Thank you!"

"You're welcome." Mana said pouring honey on his biscuit.

"How is everything?" asked Mie.

"Just fine." Mana replied.

"Yummy!" Allen smiled.

"What do you want to do after this Allen?"


It was now the fifth day that Allen had closed himself away from the world and the fifth day since the rape. It was time for change. He couldn't keep going on like this! If he did, he really would die. It was hard to admit but he really did want to get better, and continue to live. This is it. Today was the day. The day for change. Allen was going to turn his life around today, even if it killed him. His fever was gone and it had finally stopped raining, although it was late in the afternoon and still cloudy and dark outside, he didn't care. He still had the rest of the day to do SOMEthing.

Moving was becoming slightly easier for Allen. The pain in his lower back was now a dull throb. He had done nothing but mope around like a lifeless doll the entire week. He needed to take a shower, and decided he would try to eat something to quell the beast that roared just below his diaphragm. Allen rolled over, his body becoming twisted in his sheets. Tim licked his face. Allen had neither drank nor eaten in almost a week. His throat was dry and soar. His lips were cracked and a bit bloody. His eyes were bloodshot and had dark circles around them from his recent lack of sleep. His nightmares were too much. All he could see was the scene replaying, over and over again. Allen freed himself from the cocoon he had created and grabbed some boxers. He was feeling much better now and suddenly had a burst of energy. Into the bathroom he went. He started the water. Meanwhile down stairs the answering machine picked up a message.


-Beep-

"Idiot boy...I'll be home in two days around 10:00 p.m."

-Beep-


Allen surveyed his body in the full length mirror after his shower. His scabs were going away but there were still many long cuts running over most of his chest, arms, and legs. Probably more on his back that he couldn't see. Just out of curiosity Allen stepped on his scale in the bathroom. 100lbs. He was almost skin and bones he was too skinny! He really should eat. Stress from the accident coupled with starving himself the last few days really took the weight off of him. However, he felt much better now that he was clean. All of the sudden Allen's world became dizzy for a moment and he stumbled grabbing the sink for support. He was becoming extremely dehydrated. He needed to drink some water. After getting dressed, using much of his remaining strength, Allen descended the stairs. He walked over to the cabinet and grabbed a glass. He then walked over to the sink and filled it, being mindful of the still broken cup from a few days ago. Gulping down the water with haste, Allen could have sworn he tasted a little bit of blood. His throat was so soar from yelling and screaming (due to the nightmares), plus his lack of fluid. That must be why he tasted blood. He walked over to Tim's food bowl and noticed it was empty.

Where is Tim...?

Allen walked to his pantry and got out another can of tuna and opened it. He spooned out the raw meat into the cats dish and threw the empty can away careful not to cut himself this time. It was too quiet in the house. He had been in solitude now for a week and he needed to hear something. Even though he had the T.V. on a few times he heard nothing. He walked by the answering machine and noticed there were three new messages on it.


You have three new messages...

Tuesday October 5, 4:00 p.m.

"Hey Allen...its Lenalee. You weren't at school yesterday or today...I hope everything is ok...I'll call back later and check on you."

-Beep-

Wednesday October 6, 8:00 p.m.

"Hey Allen...It's Lenalee again. I said I would call back again...so I did. I really do hope you're ok. I would come to see you but you know my brother, he calls the cops if I'm even a minute late coming home from school. I hope I'm worrying for nothing. Allen please call me back. I'm worried about you."

-Beep-

Friday October 8, 5:30 p.m.

"Idiot boy...I'll be home in two days around 10:00 p.m."

-Beep-

No more new messages...

-Click-


The machine turned off. Dis-regarding the messages still, Allen walked over to the couch and tried to turn on the T.V. Nothing. A dark screen stared Allen in the face. All he could see was his ugly reflection.

His dirty self.

No!

Allen couldn't continue to let himself feel that way he hit his fist lightly on his head as if to wake himself up. He had to try to be positive. What happened, happened. He would have to learn to let it go. But it wasn't going to be that easy. Being raped leaves huge scars on a person, not necessarily physical, but mental and emotional. Now he would not only have trust issues, but he could also be nervous being alone or left alone in a room with another male. There were many things that Allen could suffer from. Of what he would? He did not know. He supposed he would find out soon enough. He was only dreading the time when the fears decided to make themselves known. A loud crash of thunder struck again rattling the house once more. Allen shivered. He now hated the rain. The once beautiful rain that made everything shine, now made everything look dull and scary. Allen sat shivering on his couch hugging his thin starved frame. He got up and walked up the stairs to his room and tried turning on the fan so he could get under his sheets and take a nap but it wouldn't turn on. He looked at his alarm clock and realized that is was off. Great the power was out.

So much for today being a new day for change! It's still going to rain... Allen thought.


````````````~The next day~````````````

Lenalee Lee had school. Not just any typical day of school! Saturday school. Her and a group of friends were caught skipping class and got Saturday school to make up for it. Lenalee finished eating lunch with her friends and headed to her next class it was one o'clock in the afternoon and she only had two more hours to wait till she could call and check on Allen again.

"Hello class." The teacher greeted as he walked into the room. A few students were respectful and uttered 'Hello...' or 'Hi...' to let the teacher know that he had been heard. Lenalee began tuning out the teacher more in favor of looking out the window. Allen drifted on her mind. She wondered how the teen was doing. Was he eating? Was he sleeping? She remembered a time where Allen went a few days without food because Cross had gone on a binge and spent all their money.

"Miss Li. My class is not that boring. Pay attention." The teacher said taping her on the shoulder.

"Yes sir. Sorry, but I'm not feeling well. May I go to the nurse?"

"Can't it wait? There are only a few minutes left in class." The teacher said.

"Yes sir." Lenalee said. She turned her head back towards the window. The rain showed no sign of letting up. Lenalee loved the rain. It smelled nice and when it was done raining everything shimmered and the sky's light up with rainbows. Everything felt fresh and renewed. But enough was enough. It had been raining hard for a week straight. She wished that the rain would just stop already. The students around her started getting up signaling that the class was over. One more class and she was done for the day. She could make it. She sat in her final class for the day contemplating on a way to go see Allen without Komui calling the cops. Komui was very over protective of his younger sister. After their parents died when Lenalee was taken away and lived in a house where she was forced to do some rather, slave-like, work Komui wanted to make sure that Lenalee never had to go through that again so he tried to watch over her as much as he could.


Lenalee arrived home and was greeted by her brother.

"LENALEE!~~~" Komui shouted as he ran up to his younger sister. Lenalee promptly gave him a swift kick to his head sending him flying across the room.

"Why do you have to be so mean to me?"

"Stop glomping me!"

"But Lenalee!~~" Komui whined.

"Listen brother, I have to stop by the library for a few minutes tomorrow before I come home!"

"Ok but hurry home after! Also, dinner will be ready in a few minutes!"

"Ok I'm going to go to my room and do some homework while I wait."

"Ok my dear sister~"

She walked up to her room and sat at her desk. She opened her backpack and pulled out a few sheets of paper with words on it and a few blank pieces. She began filing them out. She got about half way done when Komui called her down for dinner. She returned about 40 minutes later and continued writing the notes. Before she could finish though, she fell asleep at her desk pencil still in hand.

She still had not checked up on Allen.


It was now Saturday night. Allen had spent another entire day alone doing nothing. He was trying to get over this. He really was! But saying something and doing it was another thing. Allen sat on his bed sweat dripping from his forehead. He was looking down at the freshly sliced skin on the inside of both his wrists. Blood dripped on the carpet below his feet. He felt relieved. The life was rushing back to his eyes and he felt like he now had more energy. Seeing the color, so red, so vibrant, allowed him to feel and be remained of the life flowing through his veins. He was still clutching the razor in his left hand. Seeing the red gave him hope. He was finally able to see something other than the dull gray that had consumed his vision for the past two days (due to the cold). He then made a few more slashes across his arm watching the blood, after all the first two felt wonderful. Blood that was oh-so-red, dripped onto his pants leg this time. This was his best idea yet! Why hadn't he done this sooner? He felt so much more at peace now. He did not want to sleep but he knew he had to, besides he was feeling better now so maybe he could make it through the night, hopefully without a nightmare. He dropped the razor and walked across the hall to his bathroom.

Why did I just do that? He asked himself, I can't do this I'm changing! I have to get over this!

He turned on the tap and let the water run over his arms. The cool liquid took away the burning sensation he felt on his flesh. The water, a tinted pink color, rushed down the drain. Allen took a towel and dried his arms. It was 10 o'clock at night and finally the relentless rain had stopped. Allen could hear crickets for the first time in two days. The deafening silence was now lifted. Allen felt at peace.


"Tim...Stop it...I'm not going to school..." Allen said after waking up. He shivered and decided to put on some sort of clothes. He got back out of bed and walked over to his closet. He examined the clothes in it and found an extremely large T-shirt and put it on. He walked across the hall again and wrapped his arms, after the episode he had last night they needed to be. Even though he was home alone he still felt self-conscious about it, after all he hadn't gone to school in a while and he hadn't covered his 'monster' arm up since -that night-. He shuddered recalling the memories. He then went back into his room and lay in his bed. Realizing he was still only in an over sized T-shirt and boxers he got up and threw on a pair of gym shorts. He hadn't felt like doing anything at all still. Allen had finally become content enough to talk and communicate with other people, so he got up and sat in his computer chair. Wheeling it over to his computer he turned on his monitor. Almost immediately a message popped up saying FunnyBunnie0173 would like to chat with you.


ACCEPT

DECLINE

Of-course he accepted it.


FunnyBunnie0173 writes: You finally got on! I've been up half the night waiting on you and hoping you would get on today! You didn't get on for like three days what's up?

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Nothing much is up how are you?

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: I'm fine :)

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Well that's good!

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: How are you?

W#ite_CL0wN writes: I'm alright... Its been a bit rough the last few days... but I'd rather not go into specifics if that's ok with you.

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: No problem lil buddy :] So to change the subject...Where do you live?

W#ite_CL0wN writes: I live in America.

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Wow! That's amazing!

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Thanks! :)

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: No problem! Your parents must have pretty cool jobs there... where do they work?

W#ite_CL0wN writes: I...Don't have parents...

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: I'm sorry...

W#ite_CL0wN writes: its fine...

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Are you alone right now?

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Yes...

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: That's so sad!

W#ite_CL0wN writes: I have a legal guardian but he is not home at the moment.

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Oh well I feel better now...At least you have someone to look after you. :)

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Hey I'll be back in a few minutes. Someone's knocking on my door.

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Ok. Take your time :)

"Hold on I'm coming!" Allen yelled.


*knock, knock*

"Who is it?" Allen asked flinging open the door with difficulty.

"Allen!" A girl squealed. "Why weren't you in school for like the past WEEK!" she asked.

"Um... Lenalee nice to see you!" Allen said.

Lenalee took a moment to taken in Allen's appearance. He looked like he had lost some weight and that he was very tired. The bandages around both his wrists didn't go unnoticed. "Did you get into a fight?" You haven't been to school in a week!" Wait. Did she just say a week? Had it really been that long? Of-coarse he had said it to himself before but when Lenalee said it...It just seemed... a lot... longer.

"No! I didn't get into a fight!"

"Why haven't you been in school?"

"Well... It's nothing Lenalee!...really I'm ok." He said to his sister-like best friend.

"Allen are you sure?" asked Lenalee.

"Yes I am please don't worry about me" Allen said giving her his most convincing smile." I...I'm just lonely."

"Awwwe...Allen! I would offer for you to come and stay with me...but you know my brother..." she laughed lightly.

"Heh. Yeah." Allen said.

"Well I would love to stay longer and talk to you but Komui will probably call the cops to come out and search for me if I'm not home soon. Oh! I almost forgot! Here are some notes I made for you last night!" She said handing Allen some papers.

"Thank you so much!" Allen said smiling.

"You're Welcome Allen! Bye now!"

"Alright Lenalee be safe!" Allen said smiling.

"I'm sorry I couldn't stay longer!" she said turning and walking down the steps.

"It's really ok!" He said waiving. Once Lenalee was gone Allen walked back in and closed the door. Heading back up the stairs to his room, he realized that he was hungry.

Oh well...There is still no food in the house...

Walking back over to his computer desk and sitting down, he looked at his chat which had a new message.

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: You back yet buddy?

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Yeah I'm back now.

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Everything ok...That took a long time?

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Yeah! No problem! Just a friend stopping by to check on me.

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: That's good... is everything ok?

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Yes. I'm fine! Nothing's wrong!

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Alrighty then :P

W#ite_CL0wN writes: So... Where do you live?

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: I live in Germany. It's like an 8 hour time difference right?

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Yeah I guess it is! Well I'm sorry but I need to go plus you need to get your sleep. I don't want to keep you up all night! Oh and one more question?

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: No you don't have to worry about that! I'm fine! What's your question?

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Why aren't you speaking in German?

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: I just had a feeling you were American and I know English so I just started talking to you in English. :)

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Huh... Ok? Lucky guess huh?

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Yeah I guess so?

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Well I'm hungry so I'll let you go.

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Awwwe. Alright! Hey! Will you be on tomorrow?

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Sure!

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Ok get on when you get home from school!

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Ok I'll be home around 3:30, so that's around 11:30 at night for you right?

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Yes but it's no problem!

W#ite_CL0wNwrites: Are you sure?

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Yes its fine!

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Alright. Well I will talk to you tomorrow!

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Yeah! Talk to you later! Bye!

W#ite_CL0wN writes: Bye!

W#ite_CL0wN has signed off.

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Wait!

FunnyBunnie0173 writes: Oh well...

FunnyBunnie0173 has signed off.

Allen shut his computer down and walked over to his bed. His master would be home in one day and 5 hours from now, and he didn't want to be home when he got here. After all it finally stopped raining! The sun was shining outside.

Dispite his fear of being alone in public now, Allen decided he would go out and walk around for a little bit. He hadn't been out of his house in a week and he needed some fresh air. Deeming that there was nothing else to do he went job hunting. Going back inside to change into something more suitable to be seen in, Allen searched through his closet. After a few minutes he pulled out a white long-sleeved silk button up dress shirt, and a pair of black skinny jeans. After putting on his clothes he searched for a tie and slipped on some socks and shoes. He paused and grabbed his 'just in-case' stash of money and then proceeded out of his room and down the stairs. While walking he thought about his job options and what he liked to do. The most obvious one, first and foremost in his mind, food. Allen Walker loved to eat. He could eat more than any heavy-set man on the planet and not gain a pound. Since he liked food, he could look for a job at a restaurant. He could not only gain money, but possibly get a free meal, tips and a paycheck as well! Killing two birds with one stone. That was a good Idea.

"I think that's what I'll do." Allen said opening his front door. He stood there for a minute debating with himself as to weather this really was a good idea or not.

Allen began racking his brain for the names of the restaurants in town. There were many, high class restaurants, regular affordable restaurants, cafe's, diners, fast food restaurants, and more. Now the question was where did he want to work? A fancy restaurant? or a fast-food place?

Well. Let's see who's hiring first.

Allen took a step outside his door way.

Come on you can do this...He said reassuring himself as he took slow steps toward his front gate.

Just a few more steps Allen said encouraging himself. After a few minutes Allen made it outside the safety of his homes gate.

Now just keep going...head into town... you got this. Allen said slowly making his way.

Walking down the sidewalk just as he was getting into town Allen noticed a line of people waiting outside of a building. The Black Room Cafe.

What is this place? Looks nice I wonder if they are hiring?

Allen walked in and the first thing he noticed was the attire of the waiters and waitresses. All black. They were all wearing black. Even the walls, tables, chairs, floors, and booths were black. Just as the name implied, the room was all black. The floor tiles had small white glittery specks on them and the ceilings where high, giving the lights the appearance of being dim. The tables all had a glowing trim around them. Each a different color. How had Allen not noticed this restaurant before? Was it new? Who owned it? There were cushions, black of-coarse, lining the walls to his right and left as he walked in. Straight in front of him was a counter with a computer and a seating chart. Allen noticed the girl behind the counter. She had medium length light brown hair, and a very sweet face. Her name tag read Sachiko.

"Yes how may I help you?" She asked cheerfully.

"Um Hi! How are you?" Allen asked attempting conversation.

"Fine and you?"

"Fine." Allen said with a smile.

"What is it you need? A table?" She asked looking at her chart. "How many are in your party?"

"Oh no I don't need a table!"

"Well what is it then?"

"I was wondering, do you by chance happen to be hiring? And where can I receive an application?"

"Here I can give you an application! As for hiring?" she thought for a second. "I'm not sure? Just bring the application back and if we are then you will receive a call!" Sachiko said pushing a piece of paper Allen's way.

"Thank you! Would you happen to have a menu I could take home and a pen? I would like to sit over there and fill out the application." Allen asked and gestured to one of the benches.

"Of-coarse! Here you are!" She said handing Allen a menu and a pen.

"Thank you again!" Allen said and headed over to the bench. He sat down and began filling out the application. About 10 minutes later, Allen handed in the application to Sachiko and bid her farewell, again thanking her. Allen felt fairly confident in his ability to take an order and do manual labor. Cross, after all, had him working and lifting heavy things regularly. Allen knew that it would be beneficial to him to apply to more than one place at a time; therefore, he walked back outside of the restaurant and began searching for somewhere else to apply. Allen wondered around for another hour applying to a smaller cafe, and as a last resort, a fast food restaurant. It was now six o'clock and Allen was more than hungry. It felt like his own stomach was digesting itself.

What am I going to do tonight...This is the first time I've been out of the house in a week...

"Ah!" Allen said bumping into someone. "I'm sorry!" Allen bowed his head and not looking at the person he hurried away.

"No problem..." the person said after Allen was out of site. Allen began walking the streets near the cafe and found his way to the local mall. Once inside he applied to a few more stores before finding himself stopped at a cell phone store. He browsed the selection figuring that everyone else had one it was about time he got with the program. After getting help from a sales person he walked out of the store new phone in hand. Allen knew that one of the cafe's he applied to had a piano in it. He was a fairly good player, so he decided to go there and kill some time. Once at the Cafe Allen headed straight to the back where the piano was. He sat down and began playing a melody. There were a few people in the cafe and they turned to look where the melody was coming from. As Allen was playing he lost track of everything around him and focused on his music.

By the time he finished his melody he heard clapping. He turned around on the bench to find people standing and sitting around him.

"Thank you!" He said standing up and bowing. He turned around to close the piano and noticed some money on the top.

"Uhm...Did someone leave some money up here by accident?"

"No that's for you!" A girl said smiling.

"Really? I can't accept this!" He picked up the money and tried to give it back.

"No please do! You played really well! Bye!" She waived and walked off.

"Thank you so much!" He called after her. She flashed him a smile and the peace sign before she walked out the door.

Now I can buy some food!

Allen now had a whole $10. Since he spent all his money on the cell phone earlier.

What should I spend my money on? As much as I hate to say this...McDonalds it is...

Allen sighed. McDonalds was about the only place he could get a lot of food for a relatively small price. Allen walked out of the cafe and across the street. McDonalds was a block or so down and he was on his way. Allen mostly enjoyed walking around town and looking at the buildings and landscape. Meany of the buildings were tall and had windows lining every inch of their structure. It was getting later, currently it was around seven o'clock and the sky was light blue, pink, and orange. The windows on the tallest building were reflecting the sky.

I wish I had a camera...

Allen flinched as a person bumped into his shoulder.

"Ah.. Sorry." Allen said to the person who didn't even bother turning to apologize.

Right now the season was fall. It was the beginning of October. The leaves on the trees were beginning to turn yellow, orange and red. The wind blew rustling the leaves and sending a slight chill down Allen's spine. The nights were now starting to get chilly and his thin long sleeve shirt wasn't offering him much protection from the wind. After walking to his destination, McDonalds, Allen bought all that he could afford and sat down with his tray at a table. Having a huge apatite didn't help much when he was short on cash. Especially now since he hadn't really eaten a week. He thought that if he played his cards right, he would soon have a job, and not have to worry much about food for himself. After shoveling down a few cheeseburgers some fires and a drink, Allen was now satisfied, his hunger quenched and everything was staying down, for the moment that is. The sun had now completely fallen beyond the horizon and outside was a blanket of darkness. Allen glanced outside the window watching the many cars that zoomed by. He sipped on the remainder of his soda. A hint of fear flashed through his eyes. He wasn't exactly thrilled to have to be walking home in the dark. Alone.

First of all, Allen had no more money. Second it was dark outside. Allen sucked the last of his soda dry and threw away his cup. Still with no idea what to do Allen wondered outside. Now he was wishing he had his hoodie... Flashes of what the man had done to him flooded his mind. Allen gripped his arms as if to hug himself protectively trying to assure that he was alright. Now he was depressed AND bored. Trying to cheer himself up he began thinking of the person he was talking to online. The next thing he knew he had wondered to the park. He sat down on the bench and continued to think to himself. As if it was like a deja vu, Allen opened his eyes and looked at his watch. 11:05 p.m. This was just like what happened that day. All he could think about now was getting home, and the fact that he was freezing. He was running fast. As if trying to run away from his memories. Everything he did reminded him of that day. He wanted them to go away. Lock the memories away behind a door never to be opened again. Allen arrived at his doorstep at 11:22 and pulled out his keys. He walked in and re-locked the door. He was still tired and padded up the stairs to his room.

I think I'll try going to school tomorrow...

Allen set his alarm clock and changed into his night clothes. He walked over to his light switch and reached down to pet Tim who had wondered into his room. He flipped off the switch and walked back over to his bed. He got under his covers and Tim crawled in with him. In a matter of moments sleep consumed him and he drifted off into his lonely world of nightmares.


Alright! So I hope I didn't try to rush into Allen going out and doing things but here it is! I feel like I got that he was struggling to turn his feelings around still and he was depressed for a week, so I hope he doesn't seem all TOO happy all of the sudden, I just felt like he needed to get out of the house so maybe he would feel better. Well hope you enjoyed! Worked really hard on it for you guys :D