Who else thinks that there is something seriously wrong with Sasuke's logic in the Manga?

I own nothing, especially not Naruto, bleach, tomatoes, or clouds

Warning for this chapter: (you probably thought I forgot about this…well I did) distractedness, notes, and oddly slow moving Naruto


At my room (Linda and I)

"So, Candice who do you like of the Espada?"

"Probably U-man and Grimmjow."

"Why them?"

"Well U-man has pretty eyes, and Grimmjow has pretty blue hair and he let me poke him. What about you?"

"I don't like any."

"Oh."

"When are we getting Shika?"

"Umm the question is when are you getting Shika, because I don't see Aizen letting me leave any time soon."

"When am I getting Shika?" Linda asks as Itachi and the rest of them wonder in.

"Now-ish?"

"Where's the portal?"

"In your bag?"

"Oh."

"Let's send Tsunade a warning letter about her death."

"Somebody dies?"

"Well that's a given."


The Letter…

Dear Tsunade

You will most likely die soon (seven days…) according to a pattern we have discovered. Jiraya will die soon and Orochimaru is already dead so you are next. Dun dun dun. If you want to live kill Sakura so she can't replace you as Sanin.

Linda and Candice

PS. I have come to kidnapeted Shikamaru.


With Ichigo, Ishida, and Chad…

"Oh look Rukia!"

"I'm here too." Renji said.

"You are unimportant." Ichigo said.

"Who's that?"

"Oh that's Nel, and her brothers."

"Oh ok."


Back to more interesting people? Aka the Espada

"So there are intruders, and we should ignore them?" Grimmjow said.

"Yes." Aizen said.

"Are we done?"

"Yes."

"What was the point of this meeting?"

"It has no more point."

"What was the point then."

"The point that this meeting was about."

"Which is?"

"I wanted tea."

"TEA?" Linda's voice said.

"How does she hear us?"

"In the words of Candice We do not question these things." Gin replied.


Back In the room

"So you are going to leave me here, maybe we should inform Aizen before you leave." I suggest.

"Bye-bye." Linda says as she enters a portal.

"LINDA!"

"ADRIAN." Linda's voice said.

"TOMATOES!" Sasuke said.

"I still don't like tomatoes." I say.

"And I still hate you."

"Well as long as that's cleared up."


In Konoha

Tsunade has just woken up after passing out drunk at her desk from Sake and noticed a letter…

"Who would want to kidnap Shikamaru?"

Watching the Clouds

"Troublesome."

"You're troublesome." Linda said as she exited the portal.

"Why are you here?" He asked not getting up.

"Why is anyone here?"

"Hmmm, troublesome."

"And you're supposed to be a genius."

"That's what they say."

"I am here to kidnapeted you."

"It's kidnap."

"Oh, so you're not too lazy to correct my grammar?"

"Troublesome."

"Yeah, yeah, troublesome, troublesome. There's a bed in the bag."

"I'm not falling for that."

"I guess I have to so this the hard way."

"Which is?"

"Look a cloud." Linda says pointing towards a cloud and then putting the bag over his head capturing him.

"Troublesome." The bag said.


Back in the room with Candice and them

"Where the heck is Linda it's been forever and there's a creepy person staring at me." I say as I point at Itachi.

"By forever do you mean five minutes." Hitsu asked.

"You've been oddly talkative recently."

"Shut up."

"That's the Hitsu I know."

"I mean Linda shouldn't take that long, it's Shikamaru the laziest person ever…hmm maybe he and Stark should become friends. That would be the most boring conversation ever…"

"What are we doing here anyway?" Baldy asked.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"Why did you bring us all here, to Hueco Mundo?"

"Because I can."

"Is that the only reason?"

"No."

"Then…"

"I don't feel like telling."

"Why not."

"Because it's more fun this way."


Ten minutes later

"Hello." Linda said as she walked into the room with a bag that was snoring.

"Hi, I hear that you got Shika."

"It was unexpectedly harder than I thought."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean the going up to him and the putting the bag over him…"

"Ok."

"I know I am so tired."

"Well are you going to let him out?"

"He seems pretty comfy."

"Ok, well I'm bored."

"What is there to do in Hell?"

"Annoy the Espada."

"Sounds like a plan."


With Orihime

"You're friends are here, the idiots." U-man said to her then she slapped him.

"Don't make fun of my friends." Orihime said.

"Eat your food, or I'll have to shove it down you're throat." U-man said then left at the same time that we left our room.

"Look it's U-man, let's annoy him." I say.

"Let's call him trash."

"Yes, let's." I say then we run after him and cause him to stop in his tracks.

"Trash!" Linda said pointing at him.

"Trashy trash." I say.

"Trash Trashy trashy trash trash trash."

"Trash."

"I am not trash,"

"Well you called us trash." Linda said, "then we call you trash."

"When have I called you trash?"

"Ummm, We assumed you did?"

"Well I didn't."

"Oh well trash." Linda says.

"Terribly sorry to bother you then." I say as we leave U-man to find more interesting targets.

Meanwhile in Naruto

"Look a note!" Naruto exclaims.

"Why is Karin tied up?" Sakura noticed.

"She is?" Naruto asked just now noticing that the note was attached to Karin, "Oh well."

"Well she is an enemy," Kakashi starts, "I say let's leave her and go." then notices that everyone has already gone through the portal.


Meanwhile With Ichigo and company

"Why am I company?" Renji asked no one for no apparent reason.

"It's in the script." Rukia said holding my stolen script.

"Why can't it be Renji and company?"

"Because we don't like you…" A voice said from nowhere.

"Who?" Renji asked.

"I am Gai…I mean um God…youthfulness."

"What?"

"The power of youth compels you."

"Gai-sensei!"

"Lee!"

"Shut up and give us the sunset background." A voice sounding oddly like Linda's and mine said.

"Anyway, which way should we go?" Ichigo asks.

"I think splitting up is the most logical brilliant plan ever! There is no other way possible for us to go. We definitely can't go as a group and thus attack people as a group. We also must worry about one another's safety the entire time we are there. We should definitely leave our new hollow friends here so that they can go the wrong way and split up themselves." Rukia answered.

"That's oddly specific." Ishida commented.

"Sounds good, let's go." Ichigo said.

"Aren't you going to disagree because you want to make sure that I am safe?" Rukia asked.

"Nope." Ichigo responded simply.

"Don't you know I might die?" Rukia asked.

"No one dies in Bleach unless they are already dead."

"I am already dead."

"Then what's you're problem."


All of the sudden a random portal appeared in front of them. Then Candice and Linda stepped out of it.

"Hi." I said.

"Hidey-ho." Linda said waving her hand.

"Oh look!" I say pointing to Ishida.

"It's Ishigo!" Linda says also pointing to Ishida. Ichigo had magical floating dot-dot-dots in front of him.

"Huh?" Ichigo said, "I don't get it."

"You both know that's not my name." Ishida stated.

"Do we?" I ask.

"Yes."

"How would you know?" Linda asks.

"Because we've met and you knew me then." Ishida told us.

"It's been a while, we can't be expected to remember such unimportant details." I commented.

"How's it unimportant this is my pride we're talking about." Ishida said.

"Again with the Uchiha pride, oops thought you were Sasuke." Linda remarked.

"We'll we should get going now, byes." I say as Linda and I enter the portal and close it behind us.

"Wait didn't they have a portal?" Chad remarked.

"Weren't they wearing arrancar uniforms?" Rukia noticed.

"They left us here on purpose." Renji remarked.


Back with us

"Shouldn't we have left the portal for them to use?" I remark.

"Nah let them find their own way." Linda answers.

"True then there wouldn't be cool fights."

"You mean the long ones."

"Yup."

"How are we going to watch them?" Linda asks.

"The room with the screens and Tousen." I explain.

"You mean that random room?" Linda asks.

"Is that Naruto?" I ask looking out a conveniently placed window that is next to me.

"I think it is." Linda remarked looking out her own window.

"Where is Sasuke?" a loud voice said from outside.

"Yup definitely Naruto." Linda commented.

"Maybe we should tell Aizen not to kill them." I wonder.

"We should since it would be the end of Naruto and I don't even know what happens to those other people."

"Like what Karin and Juugo are doing during Sasuke's and Itachi's fight."

"Will they ever find out what happened to Jiraya?"

"Will we ever know what happened to that one toad?"

"Will Naruto ever find Sasuke?"

"Will Sasuke ever admit he's gay?"

"I'm not gay!" Sasuke interrupted.

"Where'd you come from?"

"The room."

"Ok."

"Will we ever find out Sakura's background?"

"Will Naruto ever figure out the fourth Hokage is his father?"

"Will other people ever notice that the fourth and Naruto look the same?"

"Will anyone ever notice those portals?"

"Will we ever find out what happened to Naruto's mother?"

"When will the Bleach authors ever finish with the stupid flashbacks?"

"Will Ishida ever notice that he sounds just like Sasuke?"

"Weren't we going to do something about people not dying?" I ask.

"Oh yeah. I was on a role. It was all the questions we wanted answered."

"Lots of questions. Are you coming with us Sasuke?"

"To tell Aizen not to kill Naruto?" Sasuke asks.

"How do you know that?" Linda asks.

"Were you spying on us?" I ask.

"Isn't it obvious?"

"So that's a yes."

"He said more than one word!"

"And it wasn't Hn!"

"Shut-up."

"We should probably go and tell them before he does get killed and then no more Naruto."

"And then no more fighting for Sasuke." I mock.

"That means we save Itachi." Linda remarked.

"Poor Itachi." I said.

"Bad Sasuke, you have to sleep in between me and Hitsu tonight." Linda scolded.

"Yes!" said a voice that sounded oddly like Hitsu.

"Did you hear something?"

"Nope."

"I think we need to go now, they're approaching the entrance already." Sasuke remarked looking out of my window.

"Worried about your boyfriend?"

"Seriously the both of you need to stop getting distracted and go save the dobe."

"Aww he used his pet name for him."

"How cute."

"Let's just go." Sasuke said.

"He's not denying it anymore."

"Fine, I guess we should go rescue Naruto and them."


To those readers of the Manga, yes most of those questions have been answered. We wrote this a long time ago. It's a work in progress. Currently we are working on the newer chapters but it will be a while until we get to that point in this story. It's hard since Linda and I don't live in the same place anymore. Stupid college.

Preview from next chapter:

"I have a feeling Itachi's coming." I say stopping randomly while we were walking to Aizen's throne room.

"Why do you say that?" Linda asks.

"The giant hand pointing down the hallway that says Itachi's coming." I stated.

"What do you want to do?"

"Runaway!" I say as I'm already running towards the safety of Aizen's throne room. (It has a door.)

"I'm coming and I've got me a gay." Linda said pulling Sasuke along with her.

"Not gay."