The Search Is On

Evelyn stared at the car gaped she couldn't believe they had stolen a Police car yet alone where the hell was Sid's car? Stu panicked and so did Alan. Evelyn pulled herself together and looked at the guys.

"All right, everybody act cool. All right, don't say a word." Evelyn whispered to Alan and Stu heading towards the passengers side and Phil to the drivers

"Come on, let's just get in and go. Come on. Stu, you got a five?" Phil asked Stu so he can tip the valet.

"No." Stu said rolling his eyes.

"I'll hit you on the way back." Phil said to the valet.

"Thank you, sir." the guy said walking off. Evelyn opened the back door for Alan, but Alan stood to close to the door making Evelyn nail the the baby right on the head.

"Oh, my God. Oh, my God. You just nailed the baby." Evelyn said as the baby started crying. Evelyn checked the baby to make sure he wasn't bleeding or anything.

"Are my glasses okay?" Alan asked Evelyn.

"Your glasses are fine, dick." Evelyn said frowning and getting in the car. Evelyn fanned herself with her hand from the massive heat and on top of that there was traffic. Evelyn groaned and started gating irritated from Stu's complaining.

"This is so illegal." Stu said from the back seat pulling at his collar.

"Can't you see the fun part in anything?" Phil said drinking his coffee.

"Yeah, we're stuck in traffic in a stolen police car with a missing child in the back seat. Which part of this is fun?" Stu complained. Evelyn groaned louder and pulled the window all the way down sticking one of her leg out the window. Phil looked at her and saw that she was annoyed.

"Stu, just stop it's hot and your making, Ev, mad." Phil said trying to see of the AC worked but it didn't.

"I think the cop-car part's pretty cool." Evelyn said cooling out a little from the breeze that hit her leg.

"Thank you, Eve. It is cool." Phil scoff agreeing with her.

"Doug would love it." Alan chimed in.

"Come on." Phil yelled beeping the horn Phil turned to Evelyn and smiled "Check this out." Phil turned the sirens on and got on the sidewalk.

"Oh, no. No, Phil. No, Phil. Don't do this!" Stu yelled getting desperate and screaming.

"Take it easy." Evelyn said enjoying the whole thing.

"Just try to call more attention to us." Phil said to Evelyn.

"Attention. Attention, please. Move out of the way. I repeat, please disperse." Evelyn said threw the intercom.

"Phil, stop the car, I wanna get out of the car. Stop the car, I wanna get out of the car. Pull over." Stu said. Phil ignored him and took the intercom off Evelyn's hand and looked at the female walking past them car with a leopard dress.

"Ma'am, in the leopard dress, you have an amazing rack." Phil said the women winked at him, and Evelyn punched him hard on the shoulder Phil just made a 'what' face.

"Get off the sidewalk! Get off the sidewalk!" Evelyn yelled grabbing the intercom "I should have been a fucking cop!" Evelyn said turning back to Phil. Phil nodded his head in agreement.

HOSPITAL:

Evelyn held Carlos since she couldn't trust Alan with him. Evelyn jounced the baby up and down and cooed at him. Evelyn stopped cooing at the baby and looked at the doctors who was testing a an old man his reflects.

"Look, I already told you. You both came in with a mild concussion, some bruised ribs, some scratches, and cuts. No big deal. Although none of you could articulate how it happened." the doctor said.

"Do you remember how many of us were here?" Evelyn asked him frowning.

"Ah…I don't know. I think it was just you guys. Definitely no baby." the doctor said nudging over to Carlos with his head "And one other guy."

"That's our guy. Was he okay?" Phil said excitedly.

"Yeah. He was fine. Just whacked out of his mind. You all were." he said then turned back to the old man "All right, come forward. And turn." the doctor said dropping the old mans underwear Evelyn made a disgusted face and turned around along with Phil and Stu. Alan kept watching amazed.

"Thank you, doctor." the old man said.

"Guys, I really gotta go. I'm sorry. I have a surgery up on the fourth floor." the doctor said watching his hands.

"No, I know. But we just need a couple more minutes of your time." Phil said holding out an 100 dollar bill.

"Yeah. Tuck it right in there. I don't want to re-sterilize. Walk with me." the doctor said then they all fallowed him out. Phil leaned over to Evelyn and smirked at her and the baby.

"You look cute holding a baby." Phil whispered to her. Evelyn blushed.

"Don't get any ideas, Phil." Evelyn said walking a little faster.

"Okay, here we go. Patient name, Phil Wenneck and Evelyn Somers 2:45 a.m. arrival. Minor concussion, like I said. Some bruising, scratches, and cuts. Pretty standard." the doctors said matter of factly.

"Do you mind if I look? I'm actually a doctor." Stu said holding out his hand.

"Yeah, you said that several times last night. But really, you're just a dentist." the doctor said Evelyn and Phil looked at each other and smirked "Okay, this is interesting both of your blood work came in this morning. Wow. They found a large amount of Ruphylin in your system." everybody became gazed.

"Ruphylin. Roofies. Commonly known as the date-rape drug." the doctor said.

"What, so, what are you saying, I was raped last night?" Evelyn asked but starring at Phil.

"Actually-" the doctor went into Evelyn's file. Evelyn glared at Phil 'i swear to god, Phil!' Evelyn mouthed to him.

"I don't think so. But someone did slip you both the drug. I'm not surprised you don't remember anything." the doctors said saving Phil from his death wish. Alan laughed.

"Doc, none of us can remember anything from last night. Remember?" Alan asked the the guys Evelyn just turned away from him.

"Yeah. How could someone have drugged all of us?" Evelyn asked the baby cough so she rubbed his back.

"I wouldn't worry about it. The stuff's out of your system. You're gonna be fine. I have to go." he said turning to walk away.

"Wait, wait, wait. Please, doctor. Is there anything else? Like, something we may have been talking about...or some place we were going?" Stu asked the doctor.

"Actually, there was something. You guys kept talking about some wedding last night." the doctor said thinking for a bit.

"Yeah. No shit. Our buddy Doug's getting married tomorrow." Stu said rolling his eyes.

"You know what? I want the 100 back." Phil said reaching over for the doctors pocket.

"No, no. Easy. You kept talking about some wedding you just came from. At the, uh, Best Little Chapel. You kept saying how sick the wedding was and getting all crazy about it. Okay, I hope this helps. I really have to leave." the doctors said turning to walk away gain.

"Best Little Chapel, do you know where that is?" Phil said getting his pice of paper out and a pen.

"I do. It's at the corner of Get A Map and Fuck Off. I'm a doctor, not a tour guide. Figure it out yourself, okay? You're big boys and girls." he said walking awe for good. The all stared at themselves amazed. How could some that was being very cooperative turn vulgar?

"Asswhole." Evelyn yelled down the hallway he went.

BEST LITTLE CHAPEL:

Phil parked the car outside the the Best Little Chapel parking lot and turned the car off. Everybody opened the door and got out.

"What about the baby?" Alan asked.

"Leave him in the car. We're gonna be five minutes." Phil said closing his door.

"Whoa, we're not leaving a baby in the car." Stu complained.

"He'll be fine. I cracked the window." Phil instead.

"Phil, he a human not an animal. Alan hand me the baby." Evelyn said glaring at Phil. Phil said some swearing words under his breath.

"Here." Alan said handing Evelyn the baby. Evelyn smiled and took the baby cooing at him and went inside the chapel.

"What if they don't remember us?" Stu asked.

"Well, let's just find out." Phil said "Excuse me, sir? Hi."

"Look at these guys. What happened? You miss me? You miss Eddie? You want more from me? How are you, my friend?" Eddie said in a italian accent.

"Look at this guy. You're fucking crazy. What's going on?" Eddie said looking at Alan. Alan smiled and hugged Eddie as if he knew him.

"Listen, I'm gonna tell you something. I know some sick people in my life. This motherfucker is the craziest, wildest bastard I ever met in my life." Eddie said looking at Stu. 'Is he talking about no backbone, Stu?' Evelyn thought.

"This guy?" Phil asked pointing his thumb at Stu.

"This bitch is out of her mind. What's going on, you fucking crazy mother fucker? I thought she was gonna eat my dick." Phil looked at Evelyn surprised "What happened? No love for Eddie? You don't hug me?" Eddie said feeling a bit offended.

"No, no. It's not that, Eddie. Uh, it's just that we're having a hard time remembering...what happened here last night." Evelyn said scratching her head.

"Yeah, was there a wedding here? Do you do weddings here?" Alan asked him.

"You are cracking my balls, man." Eddied said with a soft laugh.

"Obviously we were here. We're looking for our friend Doug. Do you remember?" Phil asked.

"Yeah, the small guy. Like a monkey." Eddied said with a smile.

"Yeah. You saw him?" Evelyn asked.

"Of course." Eddie said.

"Is there anything you can tell us about what may have happened last night?" Evelyn asked him.

"You don't remember nothing?" Eddied asked looking at Stu. Eddie pulled out a weeding album and gave it to the guys. Evelyn opened the album and looked thru it she saw herself dress in a white short strapless dress standing next to a blond with a light yellow dress next to Stu.

"Congratulations, Stu, you got married." Alan said smiling.

"This… This can't be happening." Stu said turning away from the photos.

"Oh, God. Look at that. I'll tell you one thing, you look seriously happy here, man." Evelyn said pouting out to one picture of just the unknown girl and Stu who was grinning.

"That's it. My life is over." Stu said complaining.

"Stu, it's okay. Look, shit happens. Come on. Melissa's not gonna know anything about this. This never happened. I'll take care of it." Phil said as Eddie walked in the room with a female caring two boxes.

"Hey, what's all that?" Alan asked.

"The High Roller package. It's what you ordered. I have coffee mugs." Eddie said pulling out a coffee mug with a picture of Stu and the female. Evelyn picked one up and smile at the picture.

"What?" Stu said turning around.

"I have baseball caps, and fancy calendars, all with pictures of Stu and Jade." Eddie said Alan picked up one of the pink baseball hats and put it on.

"Her name's Jade?" Evelyn asked him smiling.

"Yeah, and she's beautiful, man. Clean, very tight. Tits like that. But that's because she had a baby." Eddie said. Evelyn let out a breathily 'oh' and looked at Carlos.

"That explains the baby." Evelyn said.

"Uh, here's the deal. We made a mistake last night. We need this marriage annulled. You do annulments?" Phil asked Eddie.

"Of course I do. It breaks my heart and gonna make me sad, but it's no problem. Good price for you. I can't do it with just him, though. I need the chick. I need both parties" Eddie said.

"Oh, not a problem. That's great. Isn't that great, Stu? Come on, buddy. She probably knows where Doug is." Evelyn said patting his back.

"Awesome." Stu said in sarcasm.

"All right, all right. Okay. Uh, we need her address. She filled out some paperwork, right?" Evelyn asked Eddie nodded.


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