Do not know Red VS Blue it's own by Rooster Teeth. {Other language's}
"Aw. What the-. My freakin' head. Jesus." Said Grif as he woke up and saw Simmons checking over Donut. "He's hurt, Grif" said Simmons as he look over at Donut. "He'll make it, but we need to get him some help fast."
"Yeah, yeah. Hold on a second. What happened here?" asked Grif "First Donut's head exploded, and then you fainted, and then some black thing showed up and started-"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa wait" said Simmons as he does not want to look like a wimp. "I did not say faint, something knocked me out." "Ok, fine, keep lying to yourself." said Grif "Whatever helps you sleep at night." "Man, just go find Sarge or Rex." said Simmons "We need to get Donut outta here."
"Yeah, sure" said Grif said as he went out to find Sarge. "Oh, and- uh, I'm fine by the way. Thanks for asking."
"What ever, no one likes you, anyway." said Simmons
(At the Blue base)
Caboose was zooming in on the Red base to find Grif running.
"Yep, he's definitely captured. Or dead" said Caboose "Captured or dead. Ah! or captured and dead!"
"Oh, well, that's just perfect!" said a sarcastic Church. "What? What is your problem! Why do you even care if he's captured?" asked a confused Tucker "I thought you hated that guy anyway for stealing your girlfriend."
"I never said I hated Tex." said Church "I just said that she was the reason why we never got married." "HER?" said a confused Caboose.
(Back to Red base)
Lopez was aiming a gun at Tex. While Rex, Grif, Simmons and Sarge.
"What are we going to do about her." asked Rex pointing at Tex. Grif, Simmons, and Sarge just looked at Rex "Dude, it's a guy" said Grif "Yeah" said Simmons "It's a women" said Rex. "No- Tex is not a man" said Grif "Dude- Tex is a man." said Simmons.
"Dude's- Tex is a Women" said Rex he was irritated that no one was believed Tex was a women "How about a deal" said Rex "If Tex is a man I will give you guys 2 hundred dollars each." said Rex pointing at Simmons and Grif. "But if Tex is a women you guys will owe me 2 hundred dollars." said Rex he knew it was a voice filter on Tex. "deal." said Grif and Simmons said at the same time.
"Any way" said Simmons "Sarge, we need to get Donut air-lifted out of here." said Simmons as he was talking to Sarge now. As Lopez was aiming his gun at Tex. Rex and Grif were talking about other stuff.
"Could you put that in a memo and title it "Shit I already know!" "Get on the horn with command! Well, look who's up." said Sarge as he looked at Tex who was waking up. "Rise 'n shine, buttercup."
Tex was about to talk but her suit was sparking and a distorted voice came out. "Oh, great!" said Tex in a female voice. "You broke my voice filter! You assholes!"
No one beside Rex could believe Tex was a girl "Ah I knew it. You guys owe me 400 dollars." said Rex as he pointed his gun at Simmons and Grif. "Shit" said Simmons and Grif.
"You guys know, I believe that only a chick could give me a headache this big!" said Grif.
(Blue team base)
"Let me get this straight" said Tucker "You're telling me that the guy that showed up here, scared the living shit out of us, shot at Caboose, and beat the hell out of the Reds wasn't a guy at all? That he was a chick? And on top of that, she was your ex-girlfriend?"
"In a nutshell, yes." said Church "That's an excellent summary." 'I should have known." said Caboose "She didn't like me. Girls never like me." "Caboose, I don't think anybody likes you." said Tucker "I like me." said Caboose.
"I don't think Iv'e seen a girl be mean before." said Tucker "Are you sure she's a chick and not a guy, or like part guy, part shark?" "I'm pretty sure I would know if Tex was a guy, and I'm definitely sure I would know if she was part shark." said Church
"Wait, wait, wait" said Caboose "If she's a girl, then why is she named Tex?" "Uh, because she's from Texas." said Church
Caboose just stared at Church at a few second's. "Trust me, it makes sense." said Church "And you can't blame her for being so aggressive. It's not entirely her fault to begin with." "Right. You should blame God. First he makes hangovers, and now half women, half sharks that won't even sleep with me. Thanks for nothing God." said Tucker as he look up on the sky.
"Will you shut up with that!" said Church "She got recruited into some kind of weird experimental program back during basic where they infused her armor with this really aggressive AI. I'm not really sure how it all works, but all I know is it made her meaner and tougher than hell."
"AI. What's the A stand for? asked Caboose "Artificial" said Church "What's the I-" said Caboose "Intelligence!" said Church Interrubt Caboose. "Ohh what was the A again?" said Caboose.
"Let's move on." said an irritated Church "So the military put this program in her head, and that program made her a killer, but underneath it all she's really just a sweet, down home girl?" "Oh, hell no." said Church "She's always been a rotten brat. It's just that now she's a rotten brat with cybernetic enhancements."
"Wow!" said Tucker "Sounds like you really won the lottery with that one. Good catch there, buddy. She's a keeper."
"So how are you doing Caboose?" said Church "Are you following any of this whatsoever?" "I think so." said Caboose "That guy Tex is really a robot, and You're his boyfriend. So that makes you a gay robot!"
"Yeah, that's right." said Church "I'm a gay robot." He could not believe Caboose was this stupid.
(Back at Red base)
Grif, and Rex and Simmons were watching Tex.
"So" said Grif "You're a girl, huh?" "Just ignore him" said Rex "That's what we do." said Simmons
"Not so tough now that we unloaded your weapon, are you?" said Grif "Dude I'm pretty sure she could kill you." said Rex. He does not want to find out if she could kill him or the other's.
"The kid is right, I don't need a weapon to kill you." said Tex "Yeah, right!" said Grif "What are you gonna do, punch me?"
Tex just walked fast to Grif and Grif ran back "AHH!" said Grif "Not the face!" Rex just laughed at that.
(Blue base)
"Well, don't worry, because I have a great plan for how we're going to rescue Tex." said Church
"A plan?" said Tucker "Oh, man I hate plans. That means we're going to do stuff. Can't we just have a strategy or a mission statement?" "I just need you guys to run a distraction while I spring Tex." "Distraction" said Caboose "Huh that sounds a lot like decoy."
"The way I see it, the Red have absolutely no idea how many freelancers we have out here." said Church "So what I need from the two of you is to run around in the middle of the canyon wearing black armor while I sneak in the back of the base." "Sounds good." said Tucker "But Church, where the hell are we going to get two suits of black armor?"
Church just turned to the teleporter and Tucker followed were Church was looking at. "Oh, crapberries."
(At the end of the teleporter)
Just then a black armor guy walked out of the teleporter
"Are you ok Tucker?" asked Church "Yeah, I'm fine." said Tucker. Tucker and Church ran to the top of the hill
"Come, on, Caboose!" said Tucker "Does it hurt?" yelled Caboose at the Blue base "No, not at all." said Tucker "Ok!" yelled Caboose "Here I come!"
"Does it hurt for real" said Church "Oh yeah, big time" said Tucker. Few second's later Caboose in Black armor came through the teleporter. "Geez! You lied to me." said Caboose in a low voice
(Back on top of Red base)
Sarge was at the top of Red base.
"Ah, damn it!" said Sarge "Lopez, c'mere. " Just then Lopez walked to Sarge. "Do you see something out there?" On the ground of the Red base you can see Simmons, Grif, and Rex talking
"There's no L in it" said Simmons "It's pronounced "Both."" "That's what I'm saying." said Grif "Bolth." "Both." said Simmons "You sound like such an ass the way you say it." said Grif "You guys can argue about anything." said Rex to Simmons and Grif.
"Grif!" yelled Sarge on top of Red base. "Quit yer yammerin' and get yer keester up here! Need some help! Got more of them special ops fellas headed toward the base." "As in more than one?" asked Grif "Uh, maybe bolth should go, sir."
"Both!" said Simmons yelled and Rex, Rex was seriously getting annoyed. "Seriously like an ass." said Grif "Well, well!. Another brilliant idea from the thick tank." said Sarge
"Why don't you three come up? Leave the prisoner alone. We could put her on the honor system, have her guard herself." "Good point, sir" said Grif "You're God damn right it is!" yelled Sarge 'Now git yer ass up here. We got just enough time for me and Rex to spray paint the bullseye on your back. And by bullseye, I of course mean camouflage. Now move it, cupcake."
"Yeah I'll be right up"said Grif
(Back were Church was at the cliff)
"Hey, Tucker, come in, man." said Church "You there." said Church on his communicator "This is Church. The orange one is coming out of the base. I repeat" said Church
(Back were Tucker and Caboose are at)
"Repeat the orange one is coming out of the base." said Church in a static voice "Roger that." said Tucker "Oh, oh, oh! Tucker, Tucker, Tucker! Is that- Is that Church? asked Caboose and Church was talking at the same time.
"Ok, just keep moving outside the base." said Church through the communicator "and draw their attention." Tell him that I- that I said from me, to say hi." Tucker turned away from Caboose "Wait, wait, wait Hey what?" asked Tucker "I missed that Caboose was talking to me." Tucker turn back to Caboose "Shut up, man, I'm on the radio!"
(Back on the cliff)
"I said keep moving out-" said Church "I'm not yelling!" said Tucker on the radio. "I'm just telling you to let me finish talking to Church! No, I'll tell you he said hi later. No, you can't talk to him! How could you possibly talk to him on my headset?"
"Oh my God." said Church as he turn off his headset "I can't believe I actually died for this war."
(top of Red base)
Grif had a sniper rifle and was looking for the mercenaries while Lopez and Rex were standing beside him.
"I don't see any- uh oh." said Grif as he zoomed to were Tucker and Caboose were at. "Yup there's one." Caboose was just standing next to the rock. "Why is he just standing there?" "Well two thing's- one he's stupid or two he's the guy who's going to draw your fire. I just think he's just stupid". said Rex
(Where Tucker and Caboose are at)
"Caboose." said Tucker as he ducked behind a hill "Get behind the rock. They can still see you."
"They can't see me!" whispered Caboose "I can't see them!" "That's because you're facing the rock." said Tucker "oh, right." said Caboose as he hid behind the rock. "Real smooth, dipshit." said Tucker
(Red base)
"They're definitely Special ops." said Sarge "I ain't seen troop movements this coordinated since my days on sidewi-wa-kika-herger!" Church then snuck behind Sarge and took control of him. Rex, Lopez and Grif turn around to see what Sarge was doing.
"Sir. Are you ok?" asked Grif "Uh, who you talking to, Red" said Church "Me?" "No, I'm talking to Lopez because, you know, that's real rewarding." Lopez tried to hit Grif "Hey, what did I tell you about that?" said Grif to Lopez.
"Uh, I'm fine. That's- I'm just so mad about- Theses, uh, God damn Blues out here." said Sarge "I'm so God damn mad, I could spit." Church spits in side of Sarge helmet.
"Uh, sir?" said Rex "Did you just spit inside your own helmet?" Rex wanted to know if Sarge was ok. "Uh, yeah. I guess I did." said Church "Permission to speak freely, sir?" said Grif "Go ahead." said Church "That's really freakin' gross."
(Where Tucker and Caboose are at)
"Hey, Tucker?" said Caboose "What" said Tucker "I'm having a really good time with you- "
"That's great, Caboose" said Tucker as he interrupted Caboose "Yeah, it's like we're real soldiers!" "Would you please go hide behind another rock?" said Tucker
(Where Tex is at)
Simmons was guarding Tex. When Sarge/Church came in.
"Hey man." said Sarge "What's up, yo?" "Uh, hey?" said Simmons "What's going out there, sir?" "What's, uh- why, nothin'. Why would you ask if something's wrong?" "I think that's a perfectly normal question in a time of war." "Yeah, well, I don't know. You're startin' to act kind of suspicious there, other red guy. So i'm keepin' my eye on you" said Church
"Sarge, I'm starting to think that- ow! Geez, back of my head!" said Simmons as Simmons turn toward Tex. Church charged at Simmons and hit him on the head with a gun.
"What the hell are you doing?" said Tex. She could not believe she saw the Sargent hit his own man. "Tex, it's me, Church. I've come to rescue you." "You're kind of short to be Church." said Tex "What? Oh yeah right the armor. Hurk!" said Church as he exits Sarge's body armor. "What in Sam Hill?" said Sarge after Church had exited his body. "Where the- Who spit in my visor?"
"Tex, there's not much time to explain, so i'm going to give you the summary here, ok? I'm a spirt now, I'm trapped in the physical world. I possessed this Red guy so that I could sneak into the base and rescue you while the rest of our guys run around out in the middle of the canyon dressed in black armor that they got from going through the teleporter." said Church
"Ok" said Tex "What?" asked Church "That's it? Ok? You're not surprised by any of this?" "No, it pretty much all makes sense." Not even the whole' Church is a ghost' thing? That didn't do anything for you?" said Church. "I can see right through you. It's pretty obvious." said Tex. "Ok, well, let me hop back in this guy and we'll get out of here" said Church
Church jumped back in Sarge's body "Hurk!" said Sarge
(Back where Caboose and Tucker are at)
Caboose was standing on a rock with a sniper rifle.
"What are you doing?" asked Tucker "One of the reds has Tex." said Caboose as he zoomed on where Tex and Sarge/Church was at. "I'm going to shoot him and kill him and free Tex. Then Church will forgive me for killing him, and we will be friends." "Oh, come on!" said Tucker "You don't actually believe any of that, do you?" "Oh, we're gonna be best friends." said Caboose as he zoomed and aimed at Church's head.
(Where Church and Tex are at)
"All right, I'll make one more distraction, then you run up to the teleporter and escape." said Church "Ready?" One. Two. thr- before he could finished he got shoot again by Caboose. "What the- where did my body go! Oh, you've got to be kidding me!" You could here Caboose said "Tucker did it!"
(Ghost world [or something like that])
It was white and it looked like blood Gultch.
"Hello!" asked Sarge in a echo voice as he walked on top of the hill. "Hello! I said Hello! hello! Is anybody out here?" "Holy cow, would you stop yelling? said Church as he went near Sarge on the hill. "I'm here."
"What is this place?" asked Sarge "Well, that's kind of hard to explain. Um, you were shot in the head, buddy." "So here you are." "Am I dead." asked Sarge
"Are you dead? Well, yeah." said Church "That's how I ended up here." "Are some kind angel?" asked Sarge
Church just laughed at that. "Am I an angel!" Church said "Uh, yeah, actually I am. I'm a angel. uh, do you want to go to heaven? 'Cause it's like $10 to get in.'
"Well, I- I didn't really bring any-I mean my wallet's back in the car" said Sarge "Hey, you don't have it there, huh?" said Church "Well, uh, that's too bad. Pretty crappy reason to be damned to hell for an eternity." I don't remember dyin'." said Sarge "yeah, that's my fault, too. I was sort of possessing your body at the time that you were shot. Sorry about that."
"Hold on a second." said Sarge he was confused. "That ain't fair." "Not fair?" said Church "Yeah, join the frickin' club. I got shot by my own tank."
Behind them was Sheila who said "Target locked." "Oh ha ha Sheila very funny. Shut up! You know, I still haven't forgiven you. I didn't say you could talk to me yet. Go over there- get- go over by the base. Shoo!" said Church "Shoo!" Sheila's main gun looked down and dove toward the base.
(Back at Blood Gulch)
Rex, Grif and Simmons were near Sarge's body Grif was squatting next to Sarge body.
"Sarge! Don't you give up on me, soldier!" said Grif as he was crunching down near Sarge. "Do you hear me? I'm ordering you!"
(Back to ghost world [or some thing like that])
"Who is that?" said Sarge as he heard Grif's words. "Who's there?" "Looks like your guys are trying to save you." said Church
(Back at Blood Gulch)
"You gotta breathe, man!" said Grif as he punched Sarge. "Grif, stop I think you're making it worse. That's not what they teach us when somebody is dying." said Rex. He could not believe Grif was punching Sarge. "You gotta pull through!" said Church as he ignored Rex "Come on, Sarge!"
(Back to ghost world)
"That is not the way you were trained to do that, private!" said Sarge he could not believe Grif was punching his body. "He can't hear you." said Church.
(Back at Blood Gulch)
"Grif, this isn't working." said Simmons "We have to try something else." "I think he should try mouth to mouth." said Rex. He chuckled at the thought of Grif kissing Sarge.
(Back Ghost World)
"If he is giving you mouth to mouth, I'm leaving" said Church.
(Back at Blood Gulch)
"I agree with Rex I think you should give him mouth to mouth?" said Simmons
(Back Ghost World)
"I'm leaving." said Church "I can't believe how hard they're trying to save me." "Why wouldn't they?" said Church he was confused why wouldn't they save they Sargent. "I mean, my team didn't, but why wouldn't yours?" "I thought they didn't like me." said Sarge.
"Oh, don't sell yourself short. I don't even know you, and here I am about to guide you to heaven for only $5." said Church "Hold on." said Sarge "If you're an angel, how come you ain't got no wings?" "Because nobody rang a bell." said Church as he laughed. "Seriously, do you have the money or don't you?"
"Oh, I feel the worst about Grif." said Sarge "I always made fun of him. I never even told him he was my son." "The orange guy's your son?" said Church "Nah. I just wanted to screw with him one last time." said Sarge "But now I'll never git that chance."
(Back at Blood Gulch)
"He's breathing!" said Grif he could not believe he saved Sarge. "I saved Sarge." "How is that possible" asked Rex to no one.
(Back at Ghost world)
"I'm what!" said Sarge "He's what!" said Church "Well, I'll be a monkey's- They saved me." said Sarge "What?" said Church "No. Come back! We need to even the sides! "Thanks for your help wingless angel fella." said Sarge as he disappeared "Will I remember any of this?" "Yes." said Church "But only if you give me 2$."
(Back at Blood Gulch)
"Dude what will happen if Sarge doesn't wake up" said Grif to Simmons and Rex "Don't worry I know a trick to wake up the Sarge. Hey Sarge, If you don't wake up know Grif will be the new Sargent!" yelled Rex. Simmons and Grif just looked at Rex and Grif said "Dude thats not going to work."
Just then Sarge woke up coughing. "Hah!" said Sarge. He heard Rex say "I knew it would work." to Grif and Simmons "What- what happened here?" said Sarge as he look around and saw Rex, Grif and Simmons "You got shot in the head, so we gave you CPR. And saved you, sir" said Simmons. " I always believed in you two, Simmons and Rex." Rex and Simmons look at each other. "Uh, actually it's Grif you should thank, sir." said Rex
"He did all the work." said Simmons. Sarge turned behind him where Grif was standing. "Grif?" said Sarge. "Yes sir." said Simmons "Grif, why the hell would you give CPR for a bullet wound in the head?" said Sarge "That doesn't make a lick of sense!"
Grif just sighed. "You're welcome, sir." said Grif "I mean it's all so damn inconsistent. What would you do if they stabbed me in the toe, rub my neck with aloe vera?"
(A while later at the Red base Roof )
Simmons and Grif was looking at Donut in pink new armor.
"Dude this is sweet." said Donut "Command was so happy that I got the Blue flag, they gave me my own color armor!" Simmons and Grif look at each other.
"Uh, hey Donut?" said Grif "What." said Donut. "Um, about your armor." said Simmons "What about it?" said Donut "How do I put this?" said Simmons "Your armor is, um-it's a little, um-Grif, you want to help me out here?" said Simmons "It's pink." said Grif "Your armor is frickin pink." "Yeah. that's it." said Simmons "Pink."
"My armor's not pink!" said Donut. Just then Rex showed up. "Um, who's the Pink armor girl?" asked Rex. He thought Donut would return today. "It's not pink." Donut snapped at Rex "And I'm not a girl." "What? Donut is that you?" said Rex "Yes" said Donut "Oookkk Why do you have pink armor?" "It's not pink!" said Donut
"Dude, It's pink" said Rex "See Rex agrees" said Grif "Yeah, definitely pink." said Simmons "You guys are colorblind." said Donut "Why would they give me pink armor?" "Hey, don't ask, don't tell." said Grif. Simmons and Rex chucked "That's not funny." said Simmons "It's a little funny" said a laughing Grif
"Look at it!" said Donut "It's like, uh, a lightish red." "Guess what." said Grif "They already have a color for lightish red. You know what it's called? Pink." "I hate you guys." said Donut
Sarge came from the ramp with lopez following him. "Well, hello, dirtbags. And a fine hello to you, Madame." said Sarge "It's light red!" said Donut "Don't get your panties in a wad there, Barbie." said Sarge "Do you have a package for me?"
"Yes" sir." said Donut "Excellent" said Sarge "They said this speech unit should work with Lopez." said Donut "Speech unit?" asked Grif "Here you go." said Donut as he handed the speech unit to Sarge. "Affirmative" said Sarge "Command was fresh out of speech modules when I started building lopez, but once I get this baby installed, I'll finally have someone intelligent to talk to. No offense Simmons and Rex." Oh, don't worry." said Simmons "I know who you mean, sir.
"Wait a second." said Grif "Lopez is a robot?" Of course he is" said Rex. "You didn't notice that he never talks?" "I just thought he was a really quiet guy." said Grif "And the fact that he sleeps standing up and drinks motor oil didn't get your attention?" said Sarge.
"Well, I-I did think the motor oil thing was a bit odd. I just thought he was trying to impress me." said Grif "Hey, sir, you really should ground yourself before handing that card." said Simmons
"How come?" asked Sarge "Because static could damage the card," "Come on, that's an urban legend they use to sell those stupid bracelets." said Sarge. Rex, Grif and Simmons look at each other. "I suppose Pop Rocks and Soda are gonna make my stomach blow up." said Sarge as he put in the chip. "Yow" said Sarge as Lopez was glitching "Sir, I won't say I told you so, sir" said Simmons. "Good" said Sarge "I'd hate to make strawberry shortcake out of my favorite private."
"It's not pink!" said Donut
(Blue base)
You could here Donut yell "It's Lightish red!" Tucker and Caboose were talking on the ground while Tex was on the base top."Man!" said Caboose panting as he got the black stuff out of Tuckers armor "You know, this stuff does not come off easy." "Yeah, this was a lot easier when we were cleaning just my armor."
"Yeah, I know" said Caboose "That's, I think, because, you know, uh, you didn't do anything!" yelled Caboose "I'm sorry, what? It's kind of hard to hear you over the sound of your constant team killing." said Tucker "Ah- ah-" said Caboose sarcasticly laughing " Ah, ah yeah, Ahhh! Don't make me mad."
(Back at Red base)
"So what happened to me anyway?" said Donut "I recalled something about a spider on my head?" "Right." said Grif "That was a grenade." "And the last thing I remember is a loud bang, and then Simmons fainting." said Donut. "Ha! Told you so!" said Grif. Rex is laughing about Simmons fainting. "I did not faint." said Simmons "Yeah right." said Rex.
"Done and Done." said Sarge as he was done implanting the chip. "Lopez, activate speech unit." said Sarge in an ordering voice. A click was heard. Lopez was speaking Spanish words for 10 seconds. (I Do not know Spanish) "Am I the only one not understanding any of this?" said Donut "Me llamo es Lopez" said Lopez "Lopez!" said Grif "He just said Lopez! I think I understood that. I can speak Spanish!"
"Lopez, speak English." said Sarge. Lopez just spoke Spanish again. "Huh." said Simmons "I think you shorted out his speech unit with that static, sir." "Maybe princess peach here picked up the wrong model." "Seriously sir, For the last time, not pink." said Donut. Sarge just ignored Donut. "Lopez, I order you to speak a language we understand." "{Negativo}." said Lopez "I think he said No." said Rex.
"Well, this is just dandy" said Sarge then he spoke slowly "Lopez, how do we fix your speech unit?" "Why are you talking so slow?" asked Grif "He understands us just fine. Maybe you should try listening slower." "Lopez. would you like to shoot Grif?" asked Sarge "Si, senor." said Lopez. He aimed his gun at Grif. Rex just backed away from Grif slowly. "Gracias"
(Near Blue Base)
"As far as I'm concerned, I'm square with you." said Tex. Tucker and Caboose looked at Church. "I saved you from a life of imprisonment. How the hell are you square with me?" asked Church. Tucker and Caboose turned back at Tex. "Because I didn't kill you back at Sidewinder." they looked back at Church. "You know, I don't really see how not killing somebody is the same thing as doing a them a favor." They looked back at Tex "Well, if you don't appreciate it, I could just kill you right now." No you can't" said Church "I'm already dead, bitch! I guess the joke's on you."
"Stop it!" yelled Caboose "Stop fighting! Can't you see that you're tearing us apart? What about us!" "What about you?" said Tex. "We helped you, too." said Caboose sounding like he was almost about to cry "And what do we get? Nothing!" "Well, yeah, but-" said Tex "Yeah, but nothin." said Church "He's got a point." "I did help them get the flag back." said Tex "Yeah, but you were paid to do that." said Tucker "We rescued you as a favor. We could have just let you rot in the Red army prison. It wouldn't have made any difference to us."
"Fine." said Tex "I'll stay here as long as it takes to help you guys win this thing. As soon I have I'm out of here. What do you need me to do?" "I have no idea." said Tucker "If you know how to fix a tank I would have you do that." "Ok" said Tex "Wait. You- you know how you fix Sheila?" few second's later. "I love you." said Caboose
(Back at Red base)
Simmons, Grif, and Rex, and Donut were staring at Lopez
Lopez was speaking Spanish for a long time. "Man." said Grif "First he doesn't talk at all, and now we can't get him to shut up. What's he saying.?" "What are you asking me for?" said Simmons "Well, you know because you're of, uh, the Latino persuasion."
"Simmons isn't a Spanish name, you dumbass. I'm Dutch Irish." said Simmons "But I thought-" said Grif "What?" "Oh, never mind ." I'm from Iowa." said Donut "Nobody cares!" yelled both Grif and Simmons
(Where the tank was at.)
Caboose, Tex, Tucker and Church were near the tank.
"Ok, take it easy, guys. When I was over at the Red Base, I saw that they've already got their jeep fixed and a Motorcycle." said Church Tucker was about to say something but Church cut's him off. "Tucker if you say anything about no fare they got a motorcycle to pick up chicks I will get Tex to shoot you." Tucker just look's down and said "Fine" "So whatever you do ,don't let them see us before we Sheila back online." Tex and Tucker went over to the tank.
"Ok, ok." said Caboose "Even if we get Sheila fixed, how are we going to turn her over? I mean, it's not like as if we could just lift-." before he could finish Tex flipped the tank back over. "Oh." said Caboose "She is a very strong lady."
"I'm the one that's the least visible, so I'm going to head up here to higher ground. I'll keep an eye on the Red Base. If I see anything I'll let you know." said Church. "Wait!" said Caboose "I'll come with you!" "That kind of defeats the purpose, Caboose." "Ok." What if I'm really, really quiet"" said Caboose in a whispering voice.
"Do you even understand what the term 'visibility' means?" said Church. Caboose laughed at that "ah, good one, jerk." "Seriously, you don't know what it means, do you?" asked Church "Ah, no." said Caboose "Caboose, just stay here, man, and try not to swallow your tongue or anything like that." said Church as he sprinted to the cliff's. "Just watch the Red Base and tell us if you see any movement." Tucker went near where Tex was as she is fixing the tank.
"So I suppose if you're helping us, you're not as mean as I thought." said Tucker "I wouldn't say I mean. I just get hired to do mean things." "Yeah, but you like it." said Tucker "Well, I think it's important to enjoy what you do." "So let's say I paid you to kill Caboose." said Tucker as he look at wear Caboose was at far away. "You would still do it, right? Even though you're supposed to be helping us?" Tex was just looking were Caboose was at. "Is this a hypothetical discussion, or should we start talking number?" said Tex turning back to Tucker "Yeah, I don't want to talk about this anymore."
"Hey Tucker! yelled Church from the top of the Cliff "What!" said Tucker "What the hell is my body still doing up here?" "That's part of being dead, Church." said Tucker "Your body doesn't really move around much anymore. Maybe you haven't fully grasped the concept yet." said Tucker "All right, well, let me rephrase that, then. Why in the hell haven't you buried my body yet?"
"Buried?" said Tucker "With what? All we have are pistols and rifles. What do you want me to do shoot you a grave?" said Tucker "Well then, how about shipping me back home?" said Church "You know, let the loved ones pay a little respect." "Well, Church, here's your girlfriend." said Tucker as he turned to Tex. "Tex, as one of Church's loved ones, would you like to pay your respect?" Tex just turned around back to the Tank "That was a stirring eulogy. Rest in peace, good buddy!"
(Where Church's dead body was at)
Tucker, Church, and Caboose was staring at Church's dead body. "I am not happy about this." said Church "I have an idea." A few second's later Caboose yelled "I have an idea!" "Yeah, heard you the first time, Caboose, we were just ignore you." said Tucker "Since you possessed that Red guy and took control of him, why don't you just possess your own body?" said Caboose. Tucker just started at Caboose.
"Oh, I see" said Church "So that way I would be living inside of my own dead body." "Yes." said Caboose "Unable to move, just laying there rotting in the sun, rotting for all eternity. " "Yes." said Caboose "Ok, Caboose. I'll be sure to get right on that." "I think you are a mean ghost." said Caboose "Dude, you really stink." said Tucker "What?" said Church "Your body It stinks!" said Tucker
"Tucker, the first chance we get, you are going to bury my body." "Quit your nagging. Nothing's going to happen to it." "It's a freakin' indignity!" said Church "My body fought hard for this army, it deserves to be laid to rest."
"Get over it." said Tucker "You're already dead. What's the worst that can happen now?" "Hey, Church!" said Caboose looking at the sky. "Look! Birds! Why are they flying around in circles?" "Oh God" said Church as he looking up.
(Back at Red base)
"Ok, I'll go again." said Grif "I spy something that begins with- "Dirt" said Simmon. "Damn! How did you- " Well, because you did rock last time. That's all that's out here is rock and dirt." said Simmons "Dude's this canyon, it sucks." said Grif
(Back at the Cliff)
"How long do you figure until Tex fixes the Tank?" asked Church "Not much loner." said Tucker "She said It's going pretty well. The gun's almost working, and then she'll get it moving again." "That's just fantastic." said a sarcastic Church. "Why would that upset you?" asked Tucker "Because as soon as she gets the tank online, she's going to use it against the Reds, and they're all going to die." The Reds dying is a good thing. Remember? The guy that shot you.
"No, Tucker, it's not a good thing. As soon we beat the Reds, Tex is outta here, and I still haven't figured out a way to get AI out of her head." "AI-" said Caboose "Shut up Caboose!" said Church. He does not want to do the AI thing again. "And if I don't get it out before she leaves-" "If she leaves, you won't ever find her again." said Tucker interupting Church
"Right." said Church "So what are you going to do?"asked Caboose. I guess I'm going to do the only thing that I can do. I have to warn the Reds before she fixes the tank." "You're switching sides?" said Tucker "Sorry guys." said Church "I don't have much choice." "Church, uh, what- what happens when the Reds come out here to stop Tex, and then they come also with guns and they find us?" asked a nervous Caboose "I'll try to help you as best I can. Good luck, guys." said Church as he disappeared.
"Does this mean I should try to kill Church now?" asked Caboose to Tucker "I'll tell you what. Kill me. I promise not to come back." said Tucker. Caboose looked around and said "Hey Look at this!" he zoomed at where Donut and Lopez were. "No." said Tucker "They have a girl." said Caboose "There, a girl!" "A what?" said Tucker "A girl, a girl! look! Pink armor!"
Tex was looking up where Caboose and Tucker was at. "Oh, man! How come they get a girl?" "Uh, you guys realize that I'm a chick, right? And that I'm standing right here?" "Yeah, Tex, But when we say a girl, we mean girl-girl." said Tucker "And what the hell does that mean?" "Nothing!" said Tucker and Caboose at the same time. Tucker and Caboose were looking down at Tex.
"Wait a second." said Tucker as he realized something. "If Tex heard that, do you think she heard Church's secret plan to warn the Reds about her?" "I don't know, but I think I know how to find out." Caboose looked down at Tex "Hey! Tex!" Tex turned around and looked at Caboose. "Uh, did you hear Church's secret plan to tell the Red's that you were fixing the tank?" said Caboose Tex stared at Caboose for a few seconds and then looked at the Red Base. "I don't think she knows." said Caboose
(Back at top of Red base)
Grif, Rex and Simmons were on top of the roof. Lopez was behind them.
"Hey." said Simmon to Grif and Rex "Yeah" answered Grif "You ever wonder why we're here?" said Simmons "Oh dammit not again." whispered Rex as recall the god thing again. "No." said Grif "I never, ever wonder why we're here." "Thank God." said Rex he does not want to do the God thing again.
"Keegakergerk!" said Lopez as Church came behind them and took control over him. "What's wrong with Lopez?" said Simmons "I don't care." said Grif "Hey, Lopez, uh, you ok, Man?" asked Rex {Guys, I need to give...you a...warning...What? Why am I speaking Spanish? I don't know Spanish!} said Lopez/Church "Uh, sure." said Simmons {No, listen to me! The mean woman is going to kill you! She is fixing the tank!} "I think the Lopez said something about Women and tank." said Rex
(Back at Blue Base)
"Ah, crap!" said Tucker "Caboose, she's almost done fixing Sheila I better radio Church and tell him what's going on." "oh, oh, oh Tucker, please! Please! Tucker! Tucker! Tucker! Please! Please! Tucker!" "Yes, you can be the one who radios Church." said Tucker
"Thanks, man." said Caboose. He turns on his radio "Calling, Church. Come in, Church. This is your close personal friend, private O'Malley." "O'Malley?" said Tucker "You said your name was Caboose. "I never said That." said Caboose "You guys did." "Why didn't you correct us?" "Because I didn't want to be difficult."
"Come in, Private Church. Soldier unit Tex almost has the armored vehicle situation rectified. Ok, we require verification of your, uh, mission-ness" said Caboose as he cleared his throat.
"How is your progression?" "{Caboose! No one here is listening to me! I can only speak Spanish for some reason!}" said Church inside Lopez body on the radio. 10 seconds later "He wants to talk to you" said Caboose to Tucker.
Back where Sheila is at "Thank you for activating the M808v Main Battle Tank," said Sheila "Oh shit! We got trouble." said Tucker as he look down at the tank.
(Red Base)
Church/Lopez was speaking slowly. Rex just stopped listened to the conversation and turned around and found the tank behind them. Rex walked away slowly toward the ramp. "Hey, I think if you're going to live in this country, you should speak the language." said Grif to Lopez/Church
"Um guy's" said Rex as he ducked behind the ramps. "What country?" said Simmon "We're on an alien planet." said Simmons "Guy's!" said Rex "What are you, a communist?" "Guys!" yelled Rex. "What{What}" yelled Grif, Simmons and Church to Rex. Just then the tank fired at the base. THE TANK IS BACK! yelled Rex as. "SON OF A!" said Grif "SON OF A!" said Simmon "{SON OF A.}" said Church
(Where Tucker and Caboose was at)
Caboose had the sniper rifle and zooming in where the tank was at.
"Ok, I'm getting really sick of asking people what's going on through that sniper rifle." said Tucker "Church is getting mad at us." said Caboose "Oh." said Tucker "Well, that's a nice change of pace.
(Near Red base)
"Simmons I'm comin' around in the Warthog!" said Sarge as he went in the driver's seat in the warthog and drove to the base.
Grif, Simmons and Rex was hiding inside the base. You could hear explosion's behind them. "Yes sir" said Simmons "I'll, uh, I'll stay here." said Grif "I'm going to stay here to" said Rex "Yeah, you two stay here and guard this cement ramp. It's vital to our success." said Simmons as he ran near the jeep and jumped on the turret.
"All right, I'm on board." said Simmons "All right, here's the plan-!" Before he could say anything else the tank shot at the jeep. "Junebug!" yelled Sarge as the jeep flipped over. Sarge and Simmons ran toward the ramp. "Wow, back so soon? Did you guys win the war already?" said Grif sarcastically just then an explosion was heard and the base shook.
"Yeah, uh, did you want to finish telling me the plan." said Simmons "If we survive this, I'm going to kill both of you. Slowly. Then get Rex to help me bury the bodies." said Sarge
"Hey!" said Donut "What are you guys doing up here?" "The chick in the black armor's back!" yelled Rex "What chick? The one that stuck the grenade to my head?" "That's the one." said Simmons "The same chick who's fault it is that I'm stuck in this light red armor?"
"Donut, I understand the need to safeguard your masculinity, but really, dude, it's a whole lot faster just to say pink." said Grif "Oh ho, oh, I've been waiting for this." said Donut as he walked to the edge of the Red base "Hey, Remember me? I saved something for ya!" yelled Donut as he threw a sticky grenade.
It flew through the air and Rex, Simmon, and Grif turned their head's to follow were it would hit something along with Lopez/Church and Tucker and Caboose. Tucker then said "Man, that girl's got a really good arm."
The sticky grenade landed on Tex. "Ah, crap!" yelled Tex. "Hell yeah, Three points, you dirty!" yelled Donut as he said that the grenade blew up.
Lopez/Church watch in horror as he sees Tex and the tank blow up."Nooo!" yelled Church. He ran were the tank was.
(Where the Red team was at)
Grif, Simmons, Sarge, and Rex saw Lopez running to the tank. He kept on screaming "Tejas! Tejas!"
"Uh, where's Lopez going?" asked Grif. "To fight the enemy head on in hand-to-hand combat. Mano y mano." said Sarge "What a brave little compadre. Lopez, I never understood a word you said, but I do know one thing. You hated Grif, and that's the most important thing there is. Adios, amigo. Adios"
"Shouldn't we help him?" asked Rex "Nah. That would just ruin the moment."
(Where Tex is at)
Church made it where Tex was. She is on the ground and there's a lot blood.
"Church, is that you?" asked Tex "It-It's gone, Church. The AI, it's gone. Thank you." said Tex as she died.
(Where Tucker and Caboose are at.)
"Crap" said Tucker and Caboose with his back turned around. "Church is going to be mad and now he's got a body to kick our ass. Come on, Caboose, let's get back to base."
"I told you, my name isn't Caboose." said Caboose "My name is O'Malley." said Caboose in a Deep voice .
