Journey 2 D : post : "By The Book"
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SIDEWALK PATIO OF A SMALL BAR: THE FOLLOWING AFTERNOON
Peter approached the small table with atypical energy, curiosity quickening his pulse. As he sat down across from his young charge, Neal grinned, reacting to the nearly tangible sparks in his handler's eyes.
"So? Where is it?" Peter demanded "C'mon, you said you'd have it. Show me, already."
"Relax. I just got here and I need a glass of wine."
Peter studied Neal closely.
"Uh-uh, you wanna play a game."
"What? No I don't, Peter."
"I see through you like looking out a window, remember? What's the scam? What do I have to do to get my sketch?"
Neal flushed and his gaze dropped as he mumbled a reply. Now Peter was grinning as well. "Didn't quite get that. One more time?"
"I said... the Perfect Exchange."
Peter's smile slowly became a little more calculating and his eyes narrowed a bit.
"Depends who we're running it on."
"Nobody. It's just you and I."
Now the lightness began to wane in Peter's expression. In spite of El's enthusiastic approval, he was still having doubts about pursuing this tease he'd started with Neal and he could see the other man was even more uncertain. Of late, his heart, mind and libido tended to gang up on the lanky FBI agent in Neal's presence, as they were doing at that moment, but he fiercely tuned out all three. If anything was going to happen, the choice absolutely had to be mutual and Neal had to be fully aware that it was.
"Mmmm. Okay... so what are you asking for in return?"
"I, uh... I don't know yet."
"Can you look at me?"
"Not until my face goes back to its normal color."
"Looks fine from here."
"Peter..."
"Not a single snide remark, I swear. Look at me?"
Eventually, Neal raised his head. "Better. Now... tell me what you want for the sketch."
Instead of responding verbally, Neal cleared his throat, reached under his chair and brought up a small art portfolio then rose to his feet and moved off, heading around the side of the building. At first, Peter merely watched him walk away, wondering what the young man was thinking, but swiftly realized he'd never get his answer if he didn't follow. He found Neal waiting for him a few feet down the alley between the bar and the neighboring business. "Neal?"
"I'm just playing by the rules."
Peter paused, going over what the other man had told him about how this particular exercise ran.
"Right. Neutral locale, business hours... wait, you said the exchange should be public.
Are you sure..."
"Public doesn't mean people within five feet of us at all times. Anyone walking by could see... so we're good."
"As long as you feel safe. Security is key, right?"
"I'm fine."
Though he'd never reveal it and knew Peter would deny it until Armageddon had come and gone, Neal could easily see past his handler's masks as well. The uncertainty and worry he found in him now prompted Neal to be the one to extend a hand this time, lightly wrapping his fingers around Peter's wrist as he repeated his last statement with a bit more emphasis. "I'm fine."
"Yeah... but you still don't know what to ask for, do you?"
"No."
"Then... can I make an offer? Is that in the rules?"
Neal nodded slowly. Peter filled his lungs, held onto the air for a few seconds then released it by degrees, hoping to keep internal tremors from gravitating to the outside, where Neal would see. "My proposal... is a kiss for the sketch. Do you accept?"
Fighting his own private earthquake, Neal gazed at Peter and prayed the eagerness and hope that were consuming him didn't show on his face.
"Comes down to trust."
"I won't try to out-play you. I won't just do enough to get what I want and then walk away. My solemn vow."
Neal's grip tightened and he nodded once more, minutely, but enough for Peter to understand that he was being given consent. Moving out of profile, Peter placed his left side against the brick outer wall of the bar. Neal turned to face him, still fiercely clutching the other man's arm.
"If we think about it too much..." he chuckled brokenly
"I hear that. Let's just..."
Gently, but with a speed neither one anticipated, their lips met. Peter couldn't bear to close his eyes, finding himself oddly compelled to note every shift of emotion on Neal's face. Only half aware, he eased the hand Neal was attached to around the younger man's shoulder and onto his upper back and the former con-man finally loosened his hold, allowing his hand to slide inch by inch up to Peter's shoulder, where his fingers clutched once again. Neal's tongue darted out briefly, but some tiny, rational part of Peter, not yet overwhelmed by want and need, understood that they weren't ready for that. He licked Neal's bottom lip in reply, just for a moment, but didn't open up enough to let the exploration continue.
A moment later, they broke apart, panting faintly into each other's warm, rose-tinted faces.
"Well? Payment in full?" Peter asked, smiling lightly.
"I... I think I owe you a refund."
"Nah. Keep the change." Peter assured him as the handle of the portfolio was pressed into his hand. He pulled back a little more, opened the case and stared at the sketch inside.
"Oh. Oh, wow. Neal... I mean I knew you could, but... this is amazing. *You're* amazing. Thank you."
"No problem."
"Yeah, like I'm letting you get away with that. C'mon, let's go get that glass of wine, huh? I think we both deserve it."
"Shiraz?"
Peter laughed and moved back out to the tables by the sidewalk. Neal trailed behind, pondering, for the first time in a very long time, what happiness and peace were supposed to feel like and how he was supposed to tell if that was what he was experiencing. He thought it was, but he just couldn't be sure and it still wasn't in him to ask anyone else and simply believe what they told him.
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FORWARD -
