Author's Note
Here it is, a little later than I would have liked, but on Friday just the same! I'll be honest: Chapter 5 was a tad...difficult to write, particularly the final third, and I nearly decided to put off finishing it until Saturday. As some of you may have already guessed, that is because I basically had to re-invent the tiebreaker that was used, as there's nobody in the cast to ruin it like Owen did in canon. There's a bit more too what I had to do then that, though, but that will have to wait for next week.
Until then, here's the replies to the almost twenty reviews this story has gotten since last time!
80jj: Hey, don't worry about it, I'm not expecting people to review every time. I'm glad you've liked the story so far, am I'm definitely interested in that plan of yours!
Solarr-Eclipse: Didn't watch Action, eh? You might wanna try giving it a go, if only for the sake of completeness. And yeah, I figured that people would be bummed about Shawn getting the boot so early - I really like him too, but he just had to go. And I'm happy you look forward to this series so much!
Star Saber21: Yup, that's the main reason I split them up - gotta have obstacles and drama for your couples to deal with!
TheCashewChef Hatchet: Yeah, these snowstorms have really been hitting America hard. I'm in Michigan myself, and while it hasn't been too bad here it's still knocked our power out a few times. Interesting predictions, and I'm glad you like the story!
Cole D. soul: Yeah, I think you predicted that in one of your reviews. Oh, and don't worry, I'll be doing the World Tour Aftermaths - there's not exactly any reason why I wouldn't, after all. They had some great moments in canon.
spader13: Interesting theories about the next few eliminations, and yeah, a bunch of people predicted who the Aftermath hosts and 'returning' contestant would be. Thanks for the review!
acosta perez jose ramiro: Yeah, pretty much - that's one of the reasons why I specifically had Scarlett ask if she was the official team leader while the teams were being picked. Thanks as always!
Madison Wooten: Yup, that's one of the reasons I decided to get rid of them early! And yeah, you're a pretty good, but not good enough to have been the only one to call it.
ashDanLand: Hello! Please don't worry about not reviewing before now, it is more important to me that you have enjoyed my story. And since you have, thanks for telling me!
Knifez: Well, sorry to hear that. Although, to be honest I'd prefer being unoriginal by booting a previous winner early than allow them to get far in the game again at the expense of the other characters. Still, I'll keep your complaints in mind for the future, and I'm glad you still found the chapter to be fun to read.
Identification: Hey, I'm glad you liked Sierra's acting! I had to come up with a lot of her lines myself, since in canon the role was taken by Izzy, who clearly didn't follow the script.
I. M. Poik: I see, I see. And yeah, you're really not alone in your surprise, most of the other reviewers weren't expecting Shawn's elimination either. Interesting predictions as well!
JinxQueen: Yup, unless I come up with something I like better than my current plan, which is fairly unlikely. And thanks for the praise of Scarlett's leadership ability!
Ddynamo and Proxxy the First: The was basically my first plan for Shawn, but like I said I needed to swap somebody back a few episodes and Shawn was the best choice I saw. And you're not alone in disliking this, since Knifez was pretty disappointed as well. And yeah, the very idea of Izzy in the bowels of Pahkitew Island is...yeah.
FOWLKON: Yeah, that was what I was thinking - I didn't really have many ideas for him, and between his finalist status and the other characters having more important plot threads, he got an unlucky early boot.
bruno14: Thanks as always! Not much else to say though without giving things away.
ultrablud2: I honestly don't think it ever crossed my mind to have Chef approach someone else who wasn't DJ, given why the alliance formed in canon. In retrospect it probably could have worked with one of the others, but I'm honestly really happy with direction I'm taking the illegal alliance subplot. Good to see some curiosity about Amy, and I'm also glad you pointed out which episode titles I'll have to change - I've already gotten around to most of them, of course, and there's a few others I changed that aren't on that list, but thanks for posting it for others to see regardless.
Zak Saturday: Yeah, I thought so too - with Dakota being who she is, it seems like an obvious choice to have the producers approach her (and Sam) for the hosting gig before considering Geoff and Bridgette.
And that concludes that segment! Now it's just the reminder of who remains in the game:
Screaming Gaffers - Scarlett, Lightning, Beth, Alejandro, Sammy, Beardo
Killer Grips - Jo, DJ, Dawn, B, Sierra, Topher
And now, on with the show!
- Fangren
Episode 4 – Beach Blanket Bogus
A grandiose tune played as a large red 'TDA' flew in from the foreground as the narration began, coming to a rest in front of a backdrop of a starry sky; a meteor shot across behind the 'D'. "Last time, on Total Drama Action!" The typical recap song began as the scene cut to Chris McLean standing by the numbered studios. "He was a boy," he motioned to his right as a picture of Shawn looking uncertain slid on to the left side of the screen, "she was a girl," a similar gesture was followed by a picture of Scarlett smiling confidently sliding in on the right before they both disappeared and the host continued, "and last week on Total Drama Action, these long-time enemies were pitted against each other once again by a shocking team redistribution."
The clips from the previous episode began with the beginning of the team picking, and a reaction shot from each castmate as they were picked in turn. "While Shawn trusted his instincts to choose his new teammates, Scarlett put more thought into it and eventually came out ahead, breaking up a certain trio," Sammy DJ, and Dawn were shown gasping, "and sticking her opponent with a pair who hate each other," Sierra and Topher were showing glaring at each other.
"Meanwhile, Chef tried to make an illegal alliance," the hulking man was shown pulling DJ away from his team, "and Alejandro's mad thespian skills managed to just beat out Sierra." A brief clip of the Gaffers' scene was shown, as well as Sierra angrily wielded her cane like a gun. "It was all too much for Chef's tender heart," the hulking man was shown breaking out into tears, "and thanks to Jo, it was Shawn who took the Walk of Shame." A clip of Jo and Sierra's conversation was followed by Shawn smiling sadly as he was waved off down the red carpet.
"How will the Grips fare without their leader?" The footage flashed through each of the six remaining members of that team, all looking annoyed, uncertain, or scared. "What will happen to Samey and DJ's barely-there relationship?" The gentle giant smiled at the cheerleader, who blushed and nodded back. "Will my non-fat vanilla so latte ever get here?" Chris asked as the shot switched back to him. "All the answers, uh, answer, right now! In another tear-jerking episode of, Total! Drama! Action!"
xxx
(Fade to Opening Theme)
Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;
You guys are on my mind!
Ya asked me what I wanted to be,
And now I think the answer is plain to see!
I wanna be...famous!
I wanna live close to the sun!
Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!
Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;
I'll get there one day.
'Cause I wanna be...famous!
(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)
(Fade to Episode)
xxx
The episode proper opened on a shot of Chef stirring a pot with a scowl on his face, then serving up a scoop of whatever brown mush he'd made to Sammy. "Well, I guess this'll help if I decide to go on a diet while I'm here," she mumbled to herself.
"Not like you'd ever need to go on one," Alejandro said over her shoulder, flashing a gold-tinged smile when she looked back at him.
"Umm, okaaaay...," Sammy said slowly before hurrying over to one of the tables. She smiled when she saw DJ and Dawn walking together with breakfast of their own, but when the pair smiled back and turned towards her, someone just off-camera pulled them away and Sammy frowned.
"Not today, kiddos," Jo told them as she dragged the mystic and gentle giant over to the other table with her. "She's the competition now, so you'll just have to put your little friendship on hold."
"Why?" DJ asked. "It's just breakfast. What harm could we possibly do?"
"It's not like we'll be telling them team secrets or anything," Dawn added.
"Only because we don't have any," Jo said. "But if we do come up with something we need to keep from the other team, I need to know you two won't go blabbing about it to Blondie over there." She tilted her head over to Sammy, and the camera briefly cut to her looking uncomfortable as Alejandro sat next to her. "And right now, that means keeping the two teams separated. Besides, we need to work on building our own teamwork."
Dawn and DJ frowned, then exchanged a mildly confused look.
xxx
"I wonder when Jo started to care about working together so much?" Dawn asked in the confessional. "Her aura still shows that she considers herself to be better than those around her, so perhaps she's just realized that she isn't quite as better as she thought?"
xxx
"I don't know if you're aware," Alejandro said to Sammy, "but I have an older sibling of my own. We're not twins, but he's tormented me for longer than I can remember – I understand your relationship with your sister all too well."
Sammy perked up upon hearing that. "Really?" she asked with a small smile.
"Oh yes," the charmer said, "his name is José, and-"
The sound of a record scratching interrupted him, and he cast a glare at Beardo as he and Beth sat down on the other side of the table. "Girl, you better watch yourself around this guy," the beatboxer said. "He's just gonna butter you up for an alliance, then stab you in the back the moment he doesn't need you anymore."
Alejandro looked affronted by his teammate's remarks, but before he could say anything Sammy spoke up. "Oh, yeah, I kinda figured that...," she said meekly. "I mean, he's never talked to me before now, so... Oh!" she quickly turned to look at the scowling charmer, "I still wanna hear about your brother, though."
"Hmmph," Alejandro scoffed. "Honestly, if this is how everyone is going to treat me, then why even bother? You're all blowing my actions last season way out of proportion! I am not the villain you all make me out to be."
"Maybe," Beth said while fiddling with a bracelet made out of yellow beads, "but that doesn't mean we can trust you either."
Alejandro rolled his eyes, but soon widened them when a piercing whistle was blown nearby.
A surf pop tune began in the background as Chris entered the craft services tent wearing a pair of sunglasses and holding a whistle. "Hang on to your coconuts, players," he told them, the camera cutting back to show him carrying a red-and-gold surfboard under his right arm, "we're goin' back to the beach!"
"Eeeee, yay!" Sierra squealed, clapping her hands from the table closest to the door the Grips had claimed.
"Ever seen one of those 1950s surfer movies where the kids get up to neato fun before the bonfire twist-a-thon, and the bully kicks the sand castle in the nerdy guy's face?" he asked with accompanying hand gestures. The surf pop tune finished up with a few strums as Chris was answered by a shrug from DJ, a raised eyebrow from Scarlett, an enthusiastic nod from Sierra that turned into a quick shake of the head after she paused to think, an unimpressed look from Jo, and more raised eyebrows from Beth and Beardo.
"Uhh, I think you might be showing your age, Chris," Topher said with a slightly nervous chuckle. Sierra swiftly punched him in the arm, earning an "Ow!" as he rubbed where he'd been hit.
Chris pursed his lips for a brief moment before resuming his previous smile. "Well then, get ready to recreate one! Two challenges," he said as he held up the same number of fingers, "followed by a tiebreaker, if necessary. So, grab your swimsuits!" He turned and left, with B, Sierra, and Scarlett.
The camera cut over to DJ, who had been standing near the serving counter with an empty tray when Chris had entered the room, as he was pulled back by Chef. "Listen up, boy," the hulking man said in a low voice, "unless you want your team to lose again." DJ nodded fearfully. "If the sand castle thing goes down, make sure you're the kicker, not the kickee." The gentle giant nodded again, and added a nervous smile. A pan over to the entrance of the tent showed Alejandro lingering just outside, an intrigued look on his face.
/
The footage flashed forward, and a frigid wind blew across a few icy stage lights. The camera panned down to the B, Alejandro, Scarlett, Sammy, Dawn, and DJ standing in their swimsuits and shivering in the cold. "What kind of beach is this meant to be?" Alejandro asked, his teeth chattering together.
"As some of you can see," Chris said, dressed in thick white parka and snow goggles, "we're actually in the shooting studio." The camera pulled out to show an icicle-rimmed pool dominating the area behind the cast; it was flanked by film equipment on most sides and a pair of giant fans on the right. A surfboard had been attached to a stand on the back rim, and was positioned to be in front of a green screen. To the right in the foreground, Chef stood by what looked like a control panel, a green scarf wrapped around his neck.
"Then why's the dang AC sha-cranked?" Lightning asked.
"All the cameras and lights get so hot," Chris explained, "they could melt Chef's heart." He pointed at his assistant with his thumb, and the hulking man gave the single most disturbing 'cheerful' grin and wave that had ever been shown. "And the network told my agent sweaty wasn't a good luck for me," the host added, briefly fanning himself.
"Your first challenge," he said, motioning up to the surfboard, "hang ten this deck into the big blue without swallowing tail in the soup."
"Hey!" Jo barked in outrage. "You wanna repeat that?"
"Umm," Dawn interrupted, putting her hand on her teammate's arm, "I believe he just meant that whoever stays on the board longest wins."
"Exactamundo, groovy cats!" Chris told them. "So? Who's goin' first?" DJ and Dawn looked at each other, Scarlett tried to adjust her glasses while she shivered, B looked everywhere but at the host, and finally a cricket chirped from on top a light. A gust of frigid wind froze it solid, and its hind legs snapped off. "The team that wins will get a half-hour head start on the next challenge," the host explained, "aaand given tonight's reward, you should be fighting harder than Alejandro's abs over who gets first shot."
"I'm pretty sure my boyfriend's abs are better," Beth whispered to Beardo. "I haven't seen them yet, but I just know it has to be true."
The camera panned to Alejandro behind the pair who scowled at what he'd overheard. He gave the short girl a light shove with his foot and she stumbled forward a couple steps. Beardo quickly glared at him, and he shrugged. "Oops," he said in an unapologetic tone, "I must've slipped."
"We have a volunteer!" Chris said now that Beth had inadvertently stepped forward. The wannabe quickly looked back over her shoulder, then groaned and hung her head.
/
The surf rock tune briefly played again as Beth was shown hesitantly stepping onto the surfboard. "Well, here goes nothin'!" she said as she assumed an approximately proper surfing position, the Gaffers' logo appearing in the corner of the screen and a sunset appearing on the green screen.
"And, please welcome the return of some season one fan-favorites," Chris announced from behind the pool, "the sharks!"
Immediately, one of the giant freshwater man-eating sharks jumped out and snapped its teeth at Beth. She squeaked and flinched away, and Chris was shown cringing.
xxx
"Getting up there with those sharks was pretty scary let me tell you," Beth told the confessional camera as she fiddled with a few colored bead bracelets on her right wrist. "I mean, what if I had been eaten? I can't let that happen when I have so much of my life ahead of me! Especially since I've only spent less than two days with my boyfriend!" She pulled out her picture of Brady and kissed it with a giggle and a snort.
xxx
The footage cut back to show Beth now clinging from one of the supports for the lights hanging above the pool. The shark leaped up again and snapped its jaws in another attempt to grab her, but fell back down with a splash, unsuccessful. "Can someone get me down now?" she asked, still trembling. "I'm pretty sure I'm done!"
"I'm...honestly surprised you managed to jump that high," Alejandro commented, eyes wide with disbelief.
"Hey!" Beth said in minor offense. "I can't just let myself get swallowed by a shark, I have a boyfriend to think of!"
"No you don't!" Topher called up to her, cupping his hands around his mouth.
Beardo frowned at him. "Dude, can you just give her a break on that? It ain't that unbelievable that she's datin' a model."
"Hah, no," Topher replied in a serious tone. "I know an attention seeker when I see one, and I can't stand people who lie about dating attractive people."
"Since when?" Sierra asked in disbelief.
"S-since...none of your business!" the wannabe host stammered, cheeks red with embarrassment.
"Whatever," Beardo rolled his eyes before looking back up at his friend still clinging to the fixture above the pool. He cleared his throat, then announced in a slow and overly dramatic voice "Oh no! A big fat pig has gotten loose! Better hope it doesn't get close to that shark tank, it looks way too delicious for them!" He followed with a loud pig's squeal interspersed with a few crashes and vague shouts.
Two sharks immediately emerged from the water to look around, tongues lolling out of their mouths like hungry dogs. The camera cut back to Beth, who finally lost her grip and fell straight onto Chris, who was distracted watching the sharks.
"Sorry!" Beth groaned, now hidden behind the pool.
"Hey!" the host exclaimed angrily. "Watch where you're landing, okay?!"
Beardo rubbed his knuckles on his chest then blew them off with a smirk as the cast members around him laughed.
The camera panned over to Dawn and DJ, the latter of which was frowning. The petite young woman finished her soft giggle at the host's expense and turned a concerned look to her friend. "Still worried?" she asked plainly.
"About the alliance Chef wants to form with me?" the gentle giant answered in a whisper. Dawn nodded once, and he continued. "Totally! How am I supposed to say no to that?!" He motioned to his left and the camera quick-panned to follow, showing Chef as he stormed up to the still-searching sharks. He growled viciously, and the two man-eaters yelped and dived back into the pool.
"Don't worry," Dawn told him, "I'm sure it'll work out somehow! You're stronger than you think." She placed a hand on his arm and smiled, and he smiled back. The camera pulled back to show Alejandro tilting his head slightly to listen in on their conversation; he looked back forward, and rubbed his chin in thought.
/
The surf tune began again as DJ stepped onto the board, the Grips' symbol appearing in the corner of the screen. He wobbled a bit as he tried to find his balance until a shark jumped out of the water and bit off his swim shorts; he quickly covered his pixellated groin with his hands and jumped down, an expression of fear and embarrassment on his face.
Sammy and Dawn were shown watching nearby, eyes wide and blushing furiously. Sammy cracked a small smile, as did Dawn a second later, as they followed their friend with their eyes.
"The body's a beautiful thing," Chef called out as DJ ran past him, "you don't need a suit!"
/
Sammy was the next to take her turn as the sunset flickered back on to the green screen behind her. Like DJ she struggled to find her balance on the rocking board, which was helped when Chris pushed a button on the control panel and changed the background into a tornado-struck farm. Chef grinned and plugged in the giant fans, which immediately got up to top speed. Soon, a powerful wind was sweeping past Sammy from behind, and not long after the bikini-clad cheerleader was blown off the surfboard, hitting the backdrop with a splat.
/
Next was B, who hesitantly stepped onto the middle of the surfboard from the small platform at the edge of the pool. However, he briefly lost his balance with only one foot on the board, causing it to crack. It snapped entirely when he put his other foot down, collapsing beneath him and dropping the boy into the pool.
His eyes widened when he spotted the pair of sharks leering at him, but he managed to quickly grab the pieces of the surfboard that had fallen in with him and hold them out in front. The camera zoomed in as he braced for impact, and when his body was pushed backward to the wall of the pool the shot zoomed back out to show the sharks' mouths now wedged open by the pieces of the broken board. B quickly scrambled over the lip of the pool and dropped to the ground on his back, panting heavily.
Chris stepped in front of the camera and blew a whistle. "Break time!" he announced. "Union rules!"
"Finally," Alejandro muttered in the background.
"I don't mean you, sharkbait!" Chris told him.
/
A classical British tune began as the footage skipped forward. The camera was focused on one of the sharks, now sitting in a chair with a pink towel on its head, sipping a cup of tea. The shot zoomed out to show the other shark sitting nearby, accepting a piece of food from a platter that Chef was holding out. The camera panned up to the fixed surfboard, where Lightning was already in position.
"No sharks?" he said confidently. "Talk about sha-easy!" The surf music began again as the uber-jock started his turn on the swaying board, but it quickly ended as Lightning noticed something nearby.
A deeper, more ominous tune played as the camera panned up a minigun turret. When it reached the top, a cartridge of rather bewildered-looking seagulls was fitted into the top of the gun; Chris' gloved hand cocked it, and started the barrel spinning. "I love this game!" he exclaimed before opening fire.
Lightning dodged most of the seagull barrage, but when he smiled smugly and opened his mouth to say something, one of the birds was lodged right in. He gagged and spat the bird out, but two more shots – one to the stomach and the other to the shin – caused the overachiever to lose his balance and tumble into the water.
/
"Oh, those poor defenseless gulls!" Dawn said in horror as Jo stepped forward. "You must promise me you won't hurt them."
"Hey, I can't guarantee anything!" Jo told her, ignoring the mystic's frown while she circled around the pool. She paused for a moment, noting the pair of dorsal fins sticking out of the water as the sharks swam around, then shrugged and climbed the ladder on the side of the pool. "You better not expect me to go down as easily as Lightweight did!" she shouted once she'd gotten on to the surfboard.
"Oh, we'll see about that," Chris chuckled to himself as he loaded another seagull cartridge onto the gun. He opened fire, and to her credit the jock-ette managed to dodge everything that was shot at her.
xxx
"I must confess," Dawn told the make-up trailer camera, "I'm proud of Jo for overcoming her instinct to attack anything that flies at her like that!"
xxx
Chris frowned in panic. He quickly looked from his gun, which was low on ammunition, to the equipment sitting behind him, and the camera cut back to a smug-faced Jo just before a director's chair was thrown at her.
"Oof!" she said as she caught it. "Hey, you'd better watch it, McLean!" she shouted angrily before promptly getting shot in the face with another seagull, losing her balance, and falling into the pool.
One of the sharks immediately lunged at her, but she just scowled and broke the chair she'd caught over its nose, then swam away while it rubbed the injured area.
xxx
"That, however," Dawn said dryly in the confessional, "probably could have been avoided."
xxx
"Finally, we have Alejandro!" Chris announced as the charmer calmly stepped onto the surfboard, adding "Try not to lose that tooth of yours again," as he took aim with the fully-loaded gull gun. Alejandro rolled his eyes and Chris began to fire, but the handsome young man dodged the birds easily, even jumping up and somersaulting in the air.
His gun now completely out of ammunition, the host looked behind him for something else once again. The camera briefly cut back to Alejandro as he dodged a light that was thrown at him, then showed Chris as he frantically looked for something else. The camera panned to the left, showing the other members of the Screaming Gaffers watching their teammate, with Sammy standing closest to the host. He grinned darkly, and she noticed and frowned in confusion.
The camera cut back to Alejandro as his eyes went wide. "Seriously?!" he exclaimed as a screaming Sammy was hurled at him; rather than duck or dodge, he merely caught her in his arms. "No need to worry while I'm around, señorita," he told her in a suave voice, and a Latin riff played in the background when he smiled at her and his gold tooth gleamed.
"And with that," Chris announced as a triumphant tune began to play, "Alejandro secures victory for the Screaming Gaffers."
"Excellent!" the charmer said, jumping down from the surfboard with Sammy still in his arms. He walked back over to their team like that, and Lightning, Beth, and Beardo had already begun cheering for the win.
"Umm, thanks," Sammy finally told him, "but could you put me down now?"
"But of course!" Alejandro said with a smile as he set her down with the rest of their team. She immediately looked away uncomfortably and stepped closer to Beth and Beardo.
The focus cut over to DJ, who was watching the scene with a glare on his face. "Man, that guy better not be tryin' to mess with Sammy."
"Oh, I'd say he's doing more than just trying," Topher spoke up, walking up beside his teammate. "Judging by the look on her face, I'd say he's already gotten under her skin. It's only a matter of time before she falls for him hook, line, and sinker!"
DJ turned his glare to the pretty boy. "Dude, you did not just say that! Sammy ain't gonna fall for Al."
"Think what you want," Topher said with a shrug as he turned his back on the gentle giant, "but man-candy like that is hard to resist."
"Not if the 'man candy' is a slimy dude like Alejandro," DJ countered. "Now quit tryin' to mess with me."
"If you at home like messes," Chris suddenly leaned into the shot to announce, "you'll love what's up next!"
"Not really the right 'mess', Chris," Topher told the host.
"Thanks for the input, Toph," the host replied in a deadpan tone.
(Fade to Commercial and Back)
"Welcome back to Total Drama Action!" The episode faded back in with a shot of the front gate, the camera panning out and down to show the castmates and host back in their regular attire. "Where against all advice to the contrary, the players have changed out of their bathing suits. Hope you like swimmin' in your jeans," Chris told them, folding his arms.
"Do you honestly expect us to believe that we'll really be going to the beach this time?" Alejandro asked. "I suppose next you'll tell us that the bus is just late?"
As if on cue, a horn was honked and a decrepit-looking school bus drove up.
"You were saying?" Chris asked.
xxx
Sierra began her confessional by giggling. "It was pretty obvious that was gonna happen," she explained. "Everybody thinks Chris just likes making things harder for us, but it's more that he loves to do whatever it is we don't expect."
xxx
The scene cut back with Beth standing by the door to the bus in front of her lined-up teammates. "A teal friendship bracelet for Sammy to match her eyes," she said, handing over one of the wrist-full of trinkets she had to the cheerleader, who accepted it with a smile as she boarded the bus. "A multicolored one for Beardo to represent his wide range of sounds," Beth said as her long-time friend stepped forward. The hairy boy accepted the present with a finger pistol and a quick slide whistle into a peacock call, then stepped on to the bus as well.
"And I don't suppose you have one for me, do you?" Alejandro asked, stepping forward with a confident smile on his face.
"Nope," Beth said bluntly. "Sorry, but these are for friends first, and you're just a teammate!"
"I see," Alejandro said, his face falling into annoyance as he walked past the short girl.
/
The camera focused on Chris' feet as he stepped out onto sand, the dramatic tune typically reserved for the beginning of an episode starting up as the shot panned up. "Yes campers, we're actually back at your old stomping grounds," he announced as birds called in the background, "Total! Drama! Island!" The shot zoomed out as it usually did when the series' name was said, and the twelve teens were shown standing in their teams by two sectioned-off areas of beach.
"If you need to take a moment and reminisce about the great times you had here," Chris told them, Chef Hatchet standing at his side.
They just laughed.
"Fine," the host said, "we'll skip the good memories montage. Screaming Gaffers," he pointed to his left, "you've got a thirty-minute head start on," a few dramatic beats were played over close-ups of the colorful plastic tools that were in the two makeshift sandboxes, "the Sand Castle Building Contest! To be judged by our resident King o' the Dunes!" A deep drumroll played as Chef placed a tall sand-colored, castle-shaped crown on his head. "Make like prop masters, guys, and give me something awesome. I really don't want the tiebreaker to have to go down."
He motioned over his right shoulder with his thumb, and the shot cut over to a trio of logs tied together in a pyramid shape. "I don't think legal's quite approved it yet." The camera panned down the rope, showing a large boulder suspended above a crash test dummy. The rope snapped and the dummy was crushed, then the structure itself collapsed, then a reddish-orange car – its horn the Confederate national anthem and a '01' painted onto the roof – came flying off from the high ground behind the beach and crashed into the pile.
/
"Alright," Scarlett said as she began to address the other five members of her team, "it's important that we take the time to achieve the proper mixture of fine- and coarse-grained sands as well as water. We need a strong building material for this challenge, so grab a bucket and get to work."
The footage flashed forward again, showing Scarlett on her knees smoothing the edge of what looked to be a tower of some sort. She looked back over her shoulder and saw Lightning standing there with a bucket of sand in each hand, and she stood up. "Let's see...," she said as she took one of the buckets and inspected it with her finger, "this seems adequate. Good work," she added as she took the other bucket from him and turned back to her own job.
"What're you buildin' anyway?" Lightning asked, casting an inquisitive glance past the brainiac. The camera panned over to the Gaffers' work area, revealing Beth working on a mound at the base of a tall central tower.
"Right now," Scarlett answered, "we're just working on the main structure. There'll be other buildings and a proper defensive wall once the center is complete."
Lightning looked at it, shrugged, and left just as Beardo walked up with a sand bucket of his own.
"This the right mix you wanted?" he asked as Scarlett set the buckets she'd gotten from Lightning down. He offered his bucket to her, and she gave it a prod with her finger and nodded. "Cool," Beardo said. "Oh, and by the way, Sammy said she was gonna go get some more buckets and stuff."
"Understood," the brainiac said plainly. "I don't know if we'll need them, but more tools won't hurt."
/
The scene flashed over to Sammy, who was holding a stack of three metal buckets as she walked through the woods towards the beach. She spotted the Grips idling around by their designated construction area and lingered half -hidden behind a tree as she watched DJ and Dawn.
xxx
Sammy sighed. "I really thought I would have had more chances to do things with DJ as a couple by now," she told the confessional camera. "But ever since we were put on different teams, I've barely even had time to talk to him! Maybe I should try harder? I don't want to just drift apart from him now that we're finally trying to be together."
xxx
/
"Three, two," Chris counted down, his free hand in the air and his eyes on his watch. Instead of calling out 'one', Chef blew a few notes on a trumpet. "Thank you Chef!" Chris said as the two watched over the Gaffers, all but Sammy now working on a ring of five towers surrounding the central one. "Screaming Gaffers, your thirty-minute lead is over, so," he walked to the other team, "Grips, dudes, get castlin'."
Jo immediately blew on her whistle. "Alright, let's get moving! You three," she tossed buckets to Sierra, DJ, and Topher, "get started on the sand and water! You," she looked at Dawn, "find something we can use for flags and other decorations, and you," she turned to B, but he was already walking away from her with his hands in his coat pockets. "Hey," Jo exclaimed, "where do you think you're going?! Get back here!"
She tried to take a step forward but was held back by Dawn. "Don't worry,' she said, "I sense that B has a plan. It's probably best that we leave him be, he is a genius after all."
"Fine," the jock-ette said, "so long as he's quick about it. For now, the rest of us need to get started so Mr. Genius has something to work with!"
xxx
"I'll admit, I was counting on B's creative skills to score us the win," Jo told the confessional camera. "As much as I hate to say it, I can't do everything. And besides, letting the others do things like this is supposed to be good for teamwork or something."
xxx
As Jo grabbed a bucket and left to gather sand too, the camera moved to follow Dawn as she began to comb the beach with a bucket of her own.
"Hmm...," she said, squatting down in front of a few sea shells. "Oh! This one should be quite lovely!" She smiled, and picked up a large conical shell and placed it in her bucket.
/
"Well then," Scarlett said with a proud smile as she finished sculpting part of the sand with a shovel and wiped the sweat from her brow, "this should be sufficient to win us the challenge."
The camera pulled back to reveal a three-tiered castle – the central tower, the ring of five more around it, and a thick and high wall around that. It was highly detailed, possessing windows and balconies, crenelations and arches. There was even a drawbridge lowered over a currently-empty moat. An awestruck tune played as the camera paned across the other Gaffers' faces, all five looking highly impressed with the work of sand-based architecture they had produced.
/
"Darn it, where is he?" Jo grumbled as she and the rest of her team worked on a very crude-looking structure that only vaguely resembled a castle. On her hands and knees, she patted what appeared to be an attempt at a domed roof only for it to collapse and cause her to growl in frustration.
"Aww man!" DJ said. "That was actually lookin' pretty good! Now we have to start that wing all over!"
"Don't remind me," the jock-ette muttered.
"Pause that action, campers," Topher said suddenly with an excited look on his face, "looks like our ace has returned!"
The camera quick-panned to the right to show B walking towards them with a smirk on his face and a large cardboard box in his hands. He dropped it just outside the Grips' work space and opened it up for the others to see.
"...Newspapers?!" Jo said in disbelief as the silent genius started tearing the papers into strips and putting them into a bucket. "This is a sand castle building contest, how's this supposed to help?"
Sierra was shown looking thoughtful for a second before smiling and snapping her fingers. "I get it! It's a prop sand castle building contest, it doesn't have to be real! With these papers and some hairspray or something, we can just use paper mache!" B looked up from his papers and gave her a thumbs up.
A smile slowly formed on Jo's face. "Good work, Silent Treatment! I'm sorry for doubting you!" B nodded, and took an aerosol can out of his box, shaking it up before spraying it into the bucket of strips. "Alright, people," the jock-ette barked to the rest of the team, "back to work! We have a prop to build!"
The footage skipped forward to show the six Grips standing around their creation. Rather than basing their castle around a central tower, B had opted for a longer, narrower, and blockier design – it was all one building, with a large front arch leading into a central courtyard surrounded by high walls, with the main bulk of the castle at the far end. Furthermore, he had built it on top of a hill of sand, and had incorporated the shells Dawn had collected into the spire roofs.
"Ooh," Sierra gushed, "it looks just like some of the pictures my Grandparents showed me of some castles in Germany!"
"I gotta agree," Jo added, "it's pretty impressive for a paper mache sand castle! It needs a name though."
"Ooh, how about the 'Palace of the Sea Shells'?" Dawn suggested.
"Or maybe 'Grip Castle'?" DJ said.
"Obviously," Topher said, "we should call it 'Casa dos Paper Mache'!"
"Umm, no," Sierra countered. "it's a German castle, so it needs a German name. Ooh! Like Paper Machestein Castle!"
B smirked and gave her a thumbs up, and Jo rubbed her chin and nodded. "Yeah, I guess that works," the jock-ette said. "Let's go with that." DJ and Dawn nodded in acceptance, but Topher just crossed his arms and frowned.
/
The shot zoomed out to show both teams, the camera panning right and focusing in on the Gaffers as they tried to deal with a number of seagulls that had taken up residence in and around their castle.
"Shoo! Shoo! Get away!" Scarlett hissed as she and the rest of her team tried and failed to scare the birds away by flailing their arms.
"Please," Alejandro pleaded nervously, "surely you must have somewhere else to go?" None of the gulls acknowledged him or the others.
"Hey, you want me to try somethin' a little louder?" Beardo asked.
"No," Scarlett told him. "Anything loud enough to scare them away may also compromise the structure. We need to get them to leave without-" Promptly and without warning, the flock of gulls took off – and in doing so, caused the Gaffers' castle to collapse. "-compromising the build...," Scarlett finished with a groan as a cloud of sand and feathers settled to the ground.
The scene cut back to Chris and Chef, the larger man pointing at the Gaffers and thumbing over his shoulder with a glare.
"We have a winner!" Chris announced as a triumphant tune began to play. "B and the Killer Grips' clever prop, Paper Machestein Castle!"
As the winning team celebrated, the camera quick-panned over to the Gaffers who were hanging their heads in disappointment. "Aww," Beth said, "I knew I should have used my friendship bracelets to hold up the towers!"
"Which means," Chris said forcefully, casting an annoyed look to his left as the camera cut back to him, "we need a new tiebreaker!" His face fell into a scowl. "And I was hoping for the evening off. Instead," he grinned again, "gather ye some wood, campers, for a fire of the bon variety."
/
The scene changed to the woods, where Sammy was gathering sticks up off the ground when DJ walked up to her with a smile on his face.
"Yo, Sammy!" he called as a sweet and light tune began in the background. "How's it hangin'? Feels like it's been ages since we spent time together."
The cheerleader stood up and smiled. "Yeah, I know. How's it going with your team?"
The brickhouse shrugged. "Jo's been bossin' us around as usual, and Topher an' Sierra spend half the time arguin'. If it weren't for Dawn and B, I don't know what I'd do."
Sammy giggled. "Yeah, same here. It's a good thing Beth and Beardo are so nice, since Lightning keeps giving me cold looks and Scarlett is kind of...I don't know, weird I guess? Like, she's good at keeping us organized and stuff, but it's hard to tell what she's thinking sometimes."
DJ nodded. "Right, right. And what about Alejandro? I noticed him hangin' around you earlier."
Sammy hung her head and sighed. "Yeah, he's been trying to flirt with me or something, it's getting kind of annoying. I mean, I'm not gonna form an alliance with him or anything, and I'm definitely not interested in dating him."
"Yeah, I figured it was somethin' like that," DJ told her. "Honestly, that dude needs to learn how to be straight with people. He ain't gonna make it too far if he keeps doin' the same things as last season, y'know?"
"Yeah, I know, right?" Sammy giggled. "So, wanna keep looking for firewood together? I mean, it's not like this is still part of the challenge or anything," she suggested with a shy smile.
"Jo probably won't like it," he began hesitantly, "but I'd love to!" DJ have her a smile of his own before reaching out to take her hand, and they walked off together.
The background music took a slightly ominous tone as the camera panned over to show Alejandro watching with raised brow from behind a nearby tree.
/
The footage skipped ahead to night, a full moon high in the sky as the castmates and Chris stood on the beach. The host clapped his hands, and the firepit and assorted torches burst into flame.
"What the heck?" Jo barked in a disgruntled tone. "Why did you make us go collect firewood?!"
"I needed some alone time," Chris answered bluntly. "You think these hands manicure themselves?" He held out a hand towards the jock-ette, who just snorted. "Which brings us to the tiebreaking challenge!" The surf music started again as he held his hand out in front of the camera. "A watusi-twist-mashed potato dorky old school dance contest!" he announced while sampling a variety of those and similar dance styles. "Teams! Choose your best boogier for battle!"
The music ended as Alejandro immediately spun on his heel and slid forward. "I think I should handle this one," he said.
"Anybody gonna step up to the plate?" Jo asked of her team as they looked at each other with varying degrees of uncertainty and hesitation.
"Why not DJ?" Chef suggested from his spot next to Chris. "I think it's about time he showed everyone what kinda man he really is!" He nodded knowingly at the gentle giant.
"Uhh, sure, why not?" DJ said with a shrug, quickly losing his hesitation as he stepped forward.
The footage flashed forward to a close-up of a stereo on a table; Chris pressed a button on it and a surf rock song began to play. DJ and Alejandro approached one another nearby and stood face-to-face.
"I hope you're ready to be humiliated," the charmer taunted with a light chuckle.
"I can take whatever you got, dude," the brickhouse countered with a smirk.
The two young men backed up, and began to dance. Both immediately showed themselves to be talented, Alejandro's slightly exotic styles more than matched by DJ's more contemporary moves and grace. As they swayed and spun, thrusted and swung, the two dancers circled around each other, focused only on their opponent.
The camera quickly panned across the Killer Grips, who seemed to be genuinely impressed by their teammate.
xxx
"Impressive moves from the guy," Topher said in the confessional. "Nothing I couldn't have done myself of course, given my better looks and style, but pretty good all the same!"
xxx
"Watching DJ enjoy himself out there was wonderful," Dawn said in her own confessional. "True, it would have been better if Chef hadn't been the one to suggest it, but either way, I can already tell that DJ's happier for doing it."
xxx
The two stopped circling each other, and the camera focused on them as they danced separately – first DJ, and then Alejandro.
"Rock that groove, dude!" Lightning cheered, and most of the other Gaffers seemed like they were getting into it as well.
"You can do it!" Beth added happily.
Alejandro quickly flashed a smile at his teammates as he continued to dance, then noticed that Sammy's eyes were focused far more on DJ than on him and frowned.
xxx
"I believe there may be a little something more going on between DJ and Samey than mere friendship," he told the confessional camera. "Interesting, and something I should keep in mind while I try to get her on my side, but the interest that Chef has taken in DJ recently worries me more."
xxx
As Alejandro and DJ kept dancing, the camera focused in on Chris and Chef. "Man," the host said, "they're pretty even. Gonna be tough to pick a winner here."
"Hmmph," the hulking man grunted. He scowled and looked down, noticing a decently-sized rock at his feet. "Dang pretty boys...," he mumbled as he lightly kicked the rock over towards Alejandro was showing off his moves.
"You say somethin'?" Chris asked, briefly turning his head to look away from the dancers just as the rock landed right by the charmer's feet. As focused on his dancing as he was, Alejandro noticed too late – he was in mid-spin, and couldn't help but trip.
The music came to a stop as his chin hit the ground hard, and his gold tooth popped out of his mouth. "Dude, get up already!" Lightning told him. "You're gonna lose the challenge!"
"My tooth!" Alejandro said, his new-found panic causing him to ignore the others as he scrambled to pick his false tooth up from the sandy beach. He quickly brushed it off with his fingers and tried to fit it back in, but as he worked on his knees the viewpoint changed to show Chris looming over him with a frown on his face.
"What are you doing?!" he asked the boy with a look of minor disgust.
"I tripped!" Alejandro hectically explained. "Just give me a moment, please!"
"You had your moment, Twinkletooth!" Jo heckled.
"It's not like I can't go on," Alejandro argued as he got to his feet and looked at the rock he'd tripped over. "This rock just, I don't know, came out of nowhere!"
xxx
"I wasn't lying," he told the camera in the make-up trailer. "A dancer must always be aware of his environment, and I'm certain I didn't see that rock there before. Someone must have sabotaged me!"
xxx
"Yeah, it's too late for that," Chris said. "And since DJ didn't mess up, he and the Killer Grips are the winners!" As victorious music began to play, he added "And your reward...," the camera pulled out to show the entire cast, "the greatest beach party ever pitched!"
The Grips began to cheer, and DJ caught Sammy's eye. She motioned for them to meet up a little ways away before walking off and DJ followed, ignoring a brief scowl from Jo.
Chef was shown watching them leave with a smile on his face, which turned dark when he briefly met DJ's gaze and gave the boy a knowing nod. The gentle giant smiled nervously before hurrying off, and the shot zoomed out to show Alejandro watching with a suspicious expression.
/
The scene changed to the woods as the two reunited, Sammy smiling happily but DJ looking distracted. "You're a really good dancer," the nice twin opened as they drew close to one another. "I bet you're pretty happy you beat Alejandro."
"Uhh, yeah," DJ said, quickly looking back over his shoulder before smiling nervously. "Although if he hadn't tripped just then, who knows what woulda gone down."
Sammy frowned. "Well, I guess...although why would it matter, it's not like it's your fault he messed up."
"R-right," DJ told her, "totally. It was just an accident."
"...you don't think someone cheated, do you?" the cheerleader asked, her brow furrowed.
"I...," he began before pausing to take a deep, calming breath. "I honestly don't know. But I'm gonna try to find out. If I win, I want it to be because I deserve to."
Sammy smiled and nodded. "Yeah. Umm, I guess we should probably get back to the others, we've been gone for a little while..."
"Yeah, Jo ain't gonna be happy that I'm talkin' to you," DJ said, "but that ain't gonna stop me." He smiled, she giggled, and they leaned in for a quick kiss.
/
The footage skipped ahead, a hip-hop tune playing on the stereo as the camera panned down to the now-partying Grips, DJ included. A pan left took the focus to the Gaffers, disappointment and envy on their faces, as they waited in a group near Chris.
"If the losing team could just follow me to the bus," he said, motioning with one hand before walking off down the beach. The six Gaffers followed unhappily – first Lightning, then Scarlett, then Beth and Beardo, then Alejandro who looked back at Sammy, who in turn gave one last look back at the Grips before following after her team.
/
As most of the Grips were enjoying the buffet that had been provided for them, DJ and Dawn danced together nearby. They were soon approached by Topher, who had a cocky smirk on his face.
"Let me show you how it's done," he said before launching into a dance routine of his own. His style wasn't quite like either of the two who had battled earlier, and he easily managed to gain the attention of their teammates.
"Hah!" Jo laughed. "What, were you in some kind of boy band or something?"
"Hey!" Topher replied in offense as he continued to dance. "I'll have you know this is a very cool dance style."
"Pfft," Sierra scoffed, "only for boy bands. And you're not as good as Chris."
"Oh really," Topher said, stopping his dance to walk towards his rival.
"Yeah," Sierra replied, "really!"
As the two began to argue off-screen, the other Grips watched awkwardly and Jo sighed and palmed her face.
/
The scene switched to the area in front of the cast trailers back at the film lot as the decrepit old bus drove up and dropped off the Gaffers – Lightning, Scarlett, Sammy, Beardo, and Beth all exited without a word and seemed to head straight for their beds, but Alejandro lingered just on the final step before the bus door.
"Get movin', kid," Chef growled from the driver's seat, "I don't wanna miss that party."
"Actually," Alejandro said, "I believe it's time you and I had a little chat." He crossed his arms and gave the hulking man a serious look.
Chef rolled his eyes. "Fine, but make it quick."
"I know you interfered with today's challenge," Alejandro said with a bluntness that caused Chef's eyes to widen. "Not only that, but I know you have some kind of deal with DJ."
"I-I got no idea what you're talkin' bout, kid," Chef said as his eyes darted around nervously.
"Clearly," the arch-villain countered, "you do. And I don't like it, Chef. Do I need to remind you of the trouble you're already in?" He smiled grimly, his gold tooth visible in the dim light of the bus.
Chef's face fell into a sneer. "Fine. I get it, so just tell me what you want already."
"I'm glad you understand," Alejandro replied. "And my proposal is simple: you stop helping DJ and start helping me, and I'll drop my lawsuit against you. Deal?" He extended his hand and looked at the older man expectantly.
"Fine," Chef growled again as he gruffly shook the arch-villain's hand.
"Excellent," Alejandro told him as he broke the shake and turned to exit the bus at last. "Oh, but don't expect to get a cut of the money when I win," he added just before Chef closed the doors behind him. The cook growled furiously but drove off, leaving Alejandro to laugh to himself.
An ominous tune played as he walked away and the camera slowly panned to left, revealing Scarlett hiding behind a bush with a suspicious look on her face.
xxx
"With things as they are now," Alejandro said in the confessional, "it's only natural that I make use of whatever – and whoever – I can in order to win. Scarlett might think she's already beaten me, but she'll learn never to underestimate Alejandro Burromuerto."
The footage seemed to pause, and the viewpoint cut back to show Chris watching the confessional feed from his control room as the music turned ominous again. "Wow," the host said, "not really sure what he meant by that, but the dude seems just as crafty and good-looking as ever. Maybe we're related?" He paused to laugh. "Hah! He wishes!"
"Ah, no I do not," Alejandro replied on the make-up trailer feed, which had been unpaused at some point while Chris had been speaking.
The host cringed and pressed a button on his keyboard, cutting the confessional feed off entirely. "Poor delusional guy could never even swim in my gene pool," he told the camera. "More importantly, tune in next time to watch more me!" He laughed again. "Aaand a few minutes of Alejandro...," he stood up so that his head was no longer in the shot, "on Total! Drama! Action!" He immediately walked off, saying "Which one of you geniuses left the two-way mic on?"
(Fade to Black)
Author's Note - Post Script
Admittedly not the most original of chapters, particularly the first two challenges and how they were won. Still, I hope that the dance-off and ending make up for it. I really don't know anything about dancing, so I decided not to directly describe the tiebreaker; likewise, I really have no idea how good of a dancer DJ is in canon, so hopefully him going toe-to-toe against Alejandro and eventually winning isn't too unrealistic.
Also, B's castle design is based off of Neuschwanstein Castle in Germany. Just, you know, in case you want a better idea of what it looks like. Scarlett's design is just something I came up with on my own.
I can't think of anything else I want to note right now, so until next week!
- Fangren
Appendix: TSA Eliminated Contestants
Geoff - (Tied for 14th Place)
Bridgette - (Tied for 14th Place)
Shawn - (13th Place)
