A/N: This is where we go from T to M. There is a sex scene in this, and my beta reader thought I should warn you guys up front. Bella is twelve weeks along, and I tried not to be too graphic, but if you guys think it's too graphic then let me know and I'll tone it down. I don't want to get myself kicked off this site. Thanks in advance for reading this and again thanks for all the fantastic reviews. Next update won't be until Next Sunday or that weekend.
Chapter 4: Married Life
Edward's POV
Leaving Bella to go hunt was still something I struggled with, even though my family was now here in the other house. I was glad I didn't need to hunt everyday, but the times when I was gone were the most difficult. Jasper and Emmett always accompanied me, and did their best to try and lighten my mood, but it wasn't easy for them either. Nothing new was happening with the pregnancy. The baby still kicked, but it wasn't harming my wife and for that I was grateful. Bella was sleeping more during the day, but Carlisle said it was due to the nature of the pregnancy and most likely the best thing she could do.
"Emmett, don't you think the bear has had enough?" I called out as my brother ducked when the bear he was tormenting took a swing at him. I had already finished off the bear I had killed, and was hoping my brother would hurry things along.
When Emmett turned to me to say something, the angry bear lunged at him and the two fell, rolling around on the ground until Emmett finally went for the kill. I suddenly wondered about my child, and what it would be like when it was time for my little one to learn this skill. It would most likely be something the baby would have to learn, but it was difficult to picture, much like it was with Bella once she was turned.
Moments later Emmett finished with his bear and stood triumphant as he always did. "It makes this more entertaining," he said as he grabbed the bear by the foot and pulled him over to my kill. At that same moment Jasper came over to the clearing with his kill, and I was glad that it was time to go.
"They would call," Jasper said, sensing my mood.
"I realize that, but it doesn't make it any easier to be here." Once we had disposed of the carcasses, we began to run back toward the main family house where my wife was resting.
When we arrived, I found Bella in one of the offices working on her latest assignment. She was taking classes from home, and seemed focused. I walked behind her and gently laid my hand on her shoulder. Bella leaned her cheek against it, "How is your studying coming along?"
"Not too bad. It's more of a challenge than anything in high school, but I'm not complaining. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with all of this. Once you change me I won't be able to really study, and I've been thinking," she said as she spun around to face me.
"About?" I asked when she didn't answer.
"When you change me how is that going to affect the baby? I'll be out of control, and if it's for a long time I won't be able to go near her or him," my wife pointed out, her voice full of sudden sorrow.
I knelt down and pulled her into my arms. "I'm not sure you will want to hurt our child. I've been thinking about that for the rest of us, and I would think that a baby who was part vampire wouldn't be appealing to us in that way," I said.
"If I stayed human would the baby want me in that way?"
"In the same way I don't think our baby would want to harm you."
Bella pressed her lips against my neck, "I just want this all to work out, and I don't know what will happen."
"What ever happens we will be in this together."
Once we were both a little more calm, I moved slightly away from her, "How long has it been since you had anything to eat or drink?"
"Long enough, I think I'm ready for a break."
Carefully, I pulled her to her feet and held Bella's hand as we walked together down to the first level. Esme was already in the kitchen fixing some soup and a sandwich for my wife. As I sat at the table with Bella, I thought about how much I enjoyed referring to her as my wife, and smiled.
"What are you smiling about?" Bella asked.
"Nothing," I told her, kissing her before she could press for more information. By the time we were done kissing, her food was in front of her, and Bella began to eat while giving me a disapproving look.
~*~*~
Bella's POV
Having Edward happy made my life so much easier and less stressful. I was working on keeping relaxed because I found that when I worried that made me get sick. He had been smiling about something and continued to do so as I ate my soup. "You know it's not nice to keep secrets," I pointed out.
"It's not so much a secret," he began. "I like thinking about the fact that you are my wife."
I felt my cheeks getting warm, and when he brushed the back of his fingers over my left cheek, I shut my eyes. "I need to eat, but you aren't making that very easy for me."
The chair being pulled back got my attention, "Wait, what are you doing?"
My husband smiled at me, "Leaving so I won't be a distraction."
Before he could do that, I reached out and grabbed him, "You need to stay here," I growled, and he laughed making my cheeks blush again.
"Edward, you let her eat," Esme admonished, and my husband grinned as he sat back down.
"Yes, Ma'am."
Once my husband was behaving, I continued to eat my lunch needing seconds again, and wondering why I wasn't any bigger. I was twelve weeks now and barely had anything to show for it. Carlisle still couldn't get an ultrasound of the baby, but said that sometimes if a baby sat further back, the weight gain wasn't as noticeable at first.
"What are you thinking about?" Edward asked as he reached out and took my free hand.
"I'm trying not to think," I admitted as I took the last bite of soup before grabbing the other half of my sandwich.
"I wish I could attend just one class, but I'm afraid of that," I was beginning to realize the more pregnant I became the less I was going to be able to do. I really did want to attend class, but my energy level was so low that I doubt I'd stay awake long enough to get anything out of it.
My husband sat quietly, watching me as I finished my sandwich, "When the baby gets here and if you want to stay human, if that is possible, there shouldn't be any reason why you couldn't attend class."
"Only I would feel guilty about being there and not being here for our baby," It was all so confusing that at times I got headaches along with the nausea. I still didn't know what it was going to be like to have a baby, not that I wasn't thrilled by the idea of holding a part of my husband in my arms, but the idea of being a mother was still very new to me.
"Why don't we head back," Edward suggested a little later as I took my plate to the sink and rinsed it out.
Before I had a chance to answer, Alice came in holding out some pieces of cloth, as well as paint samples. I told her that she could decorate the baby's room and now that she had my permission she was planning away.
"What do you think of this color for the walls," she asked, holding out a splotch of pastel yellow, "And this for the curtains?" The fabric was lace and beautiful, but more for a girl than a boy. I'd dreamed about two babies since becoming married, a boy and a girl, and I didn't know which I would have. "Alice if this is a boy, I don't think he'd like the lace curtains."
My sister wasn't deterred at all, "We can always figure something out for that later," she said dancing away as I shook my head, turning to face my husband.
He said he liked thinking of me as his wife and I had to admit that I enjoyed thinking of him in terms of my husband, "Was it right to let her be in charge?"
Instead of answering me, Edward tilted his head forward and in a moment his lips were pressing gently into mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and held on to him until he eased away from me.
"Let's go home," he said, his voice husky with desire.
It had been a while since we had done anything other than kiss, and I hoped this time around my body would behave.
~*~
My body was more than willing to cooperate this time and as Edward pulled my shirt over my head, I felt my heart beating just a little faster. My husband reached behind me easily unfastening my bra while at the same time pressing his cool lips at the base of my throat.
Tilting my head back, I tried to remember how to breathe as his lips moved from the base of my throat down to the area between my breasts. Edward's hands moved down my back sending a chill through me, but not because I was cold. He was still mostly dressed, but I wasn't going to have any of that and moved my hand from my sides to against his chest. My fingers worked quickly to unbutton his shirt, and I gasped as his lips brushed over the nipple on my right breast. In the back of my mind I wondered about doing this, but as his mouth covered my breast, I forgot about anything other than what my husband was doing, and what my hands were now feeling.
I rubbed them against his chest, lower until my fingers found the edge of the slacks he was wearing. I unfastened the button feeling heat gathering at the center of my stomach and spreading down. Finally I got his pants undone and slid my hands into them. Edward pulled away from my breast and I heard his growl of desire, feeling the heat centering between my legs.
Edward pulled me into his arms crushing his lips against mine. I parted my mouth and he dipped his tongue into mine while lifting me up and settling me on our bed, leaning me back until he was hovered over me. Most of the time he looked to be sure I was ready for him, but our need was too great. He pushed my legs apart still managing to be careful and in one quick move his full length was inside of me.
My body had gotten used to the feel of him and quickly responded as he began to slide out of me. I wrapped my legs around his waist trying to hold him where he was, but my husband kept moving slowly out of me.
Just when I thought he was going to slip all the way out, Edward slid back into me and I shut my eyes gasping out at the way my body tightened around him.
His lips were gentler against mine and when he moved his head away from me, while remaining inside of me, I looked up at him.
"Are you…alright?" he managed.
All I could do was nod reaching for him, needing his lips back against mine. Edward pulled away only a little before moving back into me, and kept up that rhythm while at the same time sliding his arms under my shoulders, cradling his hands at the back of my head as he moved his kisses from my lips to my right cheek and to my ear. He nibbled on my ear lobe and I felt my body contract around his length.
He licked around the shell of my ear blowing into it as I felt another contraction, and moved my legs further up his back. Edward pushed deeper inside of me, lengthening his thrusts until he pulled almost all the way out before sinking back inside of me.
My walls were contracting around him and the tension began to build as my breath became more labored. Edward knew exactly when I was about to orgasm and began to move into me more forcefully. We completed at the same time and he sank on top of me resting there only a second before his hands moved down cupping my bottom. In a moment I was resting fully atop of him, and we were still together. I felt the throb of his erection, but was too spent to react. My body should have been cold by now, but it wasn't, though when he pulled the blankets over us I became more relaxed and barely notice when he slipped from within me.
~*~*~
Edward's POV
There wasn't any guilt or worry over the time I'd spend making love to my wife. We had both needed the release, and as she slept beside me I felt at peace for the first time in a long while. There were still many unknowns ahead of us, but our love seemed to be the only sure thing. Her questions earlier today began to cloud my mind and I wasn't sure what would happen once the baby got here.
When Bella agreed to let Alice decorate the room I'd been unsure, but once my sister began that project and I saw how happy my wife was, that choice seemed better for both of us. I'd talked to Carlisle about the Cambion being born without a heart beat, and he recalled the legends, adding on that it wasn't until their seventh year when they gained full ability.
My thoughts took me to the immortal children, something I was loath to tell Bella about. Would our child be that way, thirsting for blood enough so that we would fear the Volturi? I'd be damned if I'd ever let them know.
"Edward?"
"Yes, love."
Bella lifted her head from my chest. "Do you think getting books on how to take care of a baby would help me deal with my fears? Would that kind of thing even work for our child?"
Sometimes it amazed me how in tune we were to one another's thoughts. I reached out and brushed the hair from the right side of her face. "I think we both might get something out of reading them," I said, willing to do what ever she needed to feel comfortable.
"I wish we could just go at this like a normal couple without having to worry about what will come next."
"Why can't we? Bella, we can spend the next six months worrying, or we can prepare ourselves as best we can for when our baby gets here," I felt strongly about that. Worry was only going to make it worse and we just needed to step back and take each day with each new experience as it came.
~*~
The next morning it was raining. Bella and I spent time in bed kissing and cuddling, and we marveled at the feel of our baby moving around. My wife said the kicks weren't much different than when she first began to feel them, and I was hopeful that somehow those dreams she had were nothing more than something made up of the anxiety she was dealing with.
As she sat at the table eating, my cell went off, "Good morning, Alice," I said as Bella smiled up at me.
"She's eating," I answered, but already my wife was reaching for the phone.
"Here she is."
Once she had the phone, I headed for the sink to finish cleaning up already knowing what my sister had planned; hoping Bella might go along with it.
"Shopping has never been my favorite thing," I heard her saying as I put the dirty dishes in the washer.
There were several moments of silence before Bella agreed to go with Alice, Rosalie and Esme to shop for baby things. My sisters had discussed this with me while Bella was upstairs at the other house studying. They wanted to make her feel better about all of this, but I hadn't been sure shopping was the way.
She hung up as I brought her another glass of water, "They want me to baby shop."
"Do you want to go?"
"A part of me does. I need to face the fact that we are in this for life, not that I look at it as a bad thing, but I'm still trying to get used to this."
I knew exactly how she felt and kissed her cheek before taking her plate.
An hour later everyone left and after I finished with the kitchen, I headed over to the other house to speak with Carlisle. My main concern was that the baby would be uncontrollable like the immortal children, and my father was the only one who really knew of that time with any great detail. I'd told Bella not to worry, that we needed to take each day as it came, but I wanted to be prepared for anything.
~*~*~
Bella's POV
When we arrived in Boston, I was surprised. I'd thought we would be shopping in Hanover, but Alice explained that there were boutiques specializing in baby things.
"How are you feeling?" Esme asked me as she turned around. She was in the front passenger seat, and had been keeping tabs on me, which was nice. Since the wedding, and even before, my relationship with Renee hadn't been as close and I found that we were drifting apart. Having Esme fuss over me wasn't such a bad thing.
"I'm feeling fine," I admitted as Alice parked the car in a parking garage. When we got out of the car I pulled on my jacket as a gust of wind blew past me. Alice already seemed to know where we were going and she and Rose lead the way while I hung behind them with Esme at my left side.
"Esme, do you mind me asking you something?"
"Not at all," she answered.
I was aware that she had lost a child and was reluctant to ask, but took a breath and began, "Were you worried when you knew you were going to have a baby?"
My mother-in-law didn't hesitated on answering, "I think all expectant mothers go through some form of worry, and I may have too, but for the most part I was very excited to be having a baby. It's still difficult to remember that time with my son because it was so brief, but I remember how right my life was the first time I heard him cry." Her voice had grown soft and I felt my heart ache for her.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have made you think about that," I began, but she took my hand.
"I don't mind remembering, Bella, even if it is still painful. All of us are very excited about this baby, but you have to make sure to let us know when you need some privacy. It's going to be difficult not to be there at every moment," she said, smiling at me as I looked her way.
"I think having all of you around will make things easier, but I don't know how this will all work out. If the baby is more like Edward, or if I am too weak to go on and we have to take care of my needs," I sighed shutting my eyes.
"No one will let you go through this alone, and I don't think you need to worry about what happens if Edward has to turn you."
We arrived at the first small boutique and for now that discussion was at an end. Alice took my hand and led me over to the area where they sold the baby furniture, and I remembered some of my dream. Our daughter had slept in a crib made of rot iron. She was strong enough to need that, and I wondered if buying furniture before we knew what the baby was going to be like was wise.
"What to you think of this one Bella?" Alice was saying, bringing me back to the present. My sister was standing in front of a crib that was circular, and I'd never seen one like it. As I began to really examine it, another one caught my eye and I walked to it placing my hand on the safety bar. The crib was wooden, but the design was similar to the crib in my dream. It was a Venetian crib, and I didn't even want to know what the cost would be.
"I like this, Bella," Rosalie said as she came over to my side.
"I had a dream about what it would be like to have this baby, and the crib in my dream was similar to this one. It had the rounded headboards, and the fancy joint work like this one," I whispered, wondering if this were real.
Alice stood at my other side, "Do you want me to add this to our list?"
"It's got to be expensive," I said. I knew my family had unlimited resources but the thought of buying such a fancy crib when we didn't know what to expect with this baby was hard to stomach.
"Don't worry about that," Esme assured me.
I turned around looking at her for a moment, "What ever we spend in here I really don't want to know."
They all agreed and we went on looking at rocking chairs and other things. All of it still felt so surreal, and I tried to imagine my baby sleeping in that crib, or me rocking my baby in one of the many chairs I sat in. My worries also began to grow because of the vivid memories of my dream. The baby there whose name I'd never really known hadn't stayed little for very long.
By the time we arrived at the third shop, I was so overwhelmed by it all, that I was beginning to feel sick. Alice was the one who noticed first and without a word she guided me to a chair. "Its okay, Bella, are you ready to go home? Rosalie, Esme, and I can always do the rest on our own," she was saying, but my head was swimming with images from my dreams and what we had done today. All of the sudden I knew what I needed and fought back the tears. "I need Edward," I whispered, knowing that they could hear me over the noise from the shop.
It was the first time I realized just how much being with him kept me centered and calm. All of the old fears from the time he left crept up, and I was glad Alice had my hand and Rose and Esme were surrounding me as we walked. When we got to the car, Alice held on to me while Rosalie opened the door. She helped me slip inside and moved in next to me wrapping her arms around me as I took in several deep breaths.
~*~*~
Edward's POV
Carlisle and I had just finished discussing the Immortal Children when my phone began to ring. As I pulled it out of my pocket I felt better than I had about this pregnancy than ever before. We had both sat down and looked at everything from a medical and genetic stand point, and agreed that because this child was part human the likelihood of it being out of control and unable to learn was highly improbable.
"Alice?" Before my sister could talk I heard Bella's sobs and the good mood I had been in melted away. "What happened?"
"I think she was overwhelmed. Bella, can you talk to Edward?"
I heard the phone being passed around before I heard Bella's intake of breath. "Shh," I whispered as I walked outside and leaned against the house, wanting to be there instead of here.
"I'm so stupid," she managed. I waited but she was still trying to catch her breath.
"Why would you think that," I asked, concerned by how upset she was.
"It was just shopping, nothing more and I'm a blubbering mess." Her words came frantically before she took another few breaths, "I just kept thinking about those dreams, and how much I missed you, and it all just happened so fast." When she began to cry again I pushed away from the house. The phone transferred hands and it was Esme.
"How far away are you?"
"At least another hour," she answered.
Once I knew which road they were traveling on, I began to run. I couldn't wait an hour while my wife was this upset and I felt guilty for not going with them. As I ran, what Bella said about the dreams concerned me. It wasn't what she saw, but how much she was hanging on to them. Somehow I needed to make her realize that those dreams were not factual, but that wouldn't be easy.
When I arrived on the same road they were traveling on I phoned Alice and told her which mile marker I was closest to. I stayed behind some trees, pulling at my hair until I finally heard the motor from the BMW Rosalie drove. It had a distinctive purr thanks to her tuning, and once the car was pulled over and no one else was around I moved quickly to get in.
Bella wasn't as upset, but came right into my arms the moment the door was shut.
"I'm sorry," she began, but I put my finger over her lips.
"You have nothing in the world to be sorry for," She sighed and her breathing returned to normal after a few minutes.
"We found a crib," she whispered as I rested my cheek atop her head.
"What is it like?"
"It's really fancy, kind of like the one in my dream, but I didn't want it because of that. I just could see the baby there, but I started to think about my dreams…"
Again I put my finger over her lips, "Bella, somehow you have to push those dreams away. There is little truth in them. Carlisle and I talked a great deal about the baby today, and we think the human genes will play a huge role in all of this. Our baby will likely need blood as part of his or her diet, but the fact that it's growing at a normal rate leads us to believe that the blood lust won't be there." It was hard to put it into terms my wife would understand, but I felt her relaxing in my arms as I explained everything.
When we got to our house, and after Bella and I said goodbye to our family I led her inside to the kitchen ready to fix her something to eat but she stopped me, "I think I want to do this," she said smirking at me as she walked to the refrigerator. It was as if her upset had not occurred, and I realized just how much she needed me. Being needed was something new for me, because Bella was so independent, but given the circumstances of this pregnancy, I could understand her feelings, because I felt more centered with her by my side than when she was gone.
