Chapter 4

A/N: Due to popular demand and help from my best friend, sayianprincess1992, I'm continuing this story with a fourth chapter! Hope you enjoy!

Damon: *starts singing* Jesus loves me this I know. For the bible tells me so. Little ones to him belong. They are weak but he is strong.

Stefan: 0_o

Damon: *starts singing* I'll fly away oh glory I'll fly away. When I die hallelujah by and by. I'll fly away!

Damon: Yo Mamma is so old she had sex with a dinosaur.

Elena: *twitch* excuse me?

Damon: Hey Stefan, do you want to go frolic in the flowery fields and chew on little bunnies?

Stefan: Damon, I'm calling the funny farm.

Damon: *eyes widen* funny farm? Ooooh I wanna go to the funny farm! *hops around like a little kid hyped up on candy*

Stefan: *faceplam*

Damon: Mary had a little lamb, little lamb little lamb!

Doctor: What's wrong with him?

Stefan: He got dropped too many times as a baby and he was in love with a psycho girl.

Damon: There was a vampire on a farm and Katherine was her name-o. She was a B-I-T-C-H, B-I-T-C-H, B-I-T-C-H, and B-I-T-C-H was her name-o!

Stefan: For once I agree with your messed up logic.

Damon: I'm hungry momma!

Damon: In my world, everyone is a pony and we all eat rainbows and poop butterflies!

Stefan: *manga sweat drop*

Damon: *singing* I can't remember how much I have had. I drank a 12 pack, with my dad.

Damon: *sings* This land is your land, this land is mine land. From California to the New York Islands...

Damon: *walks up to Stefan wearing baggy pants, a ripped up t-shirt, and smoking a cigar.* Yo whatssup my brother?

Stefan: *takes a step back* what are you- why are you dressed like that?

Damon: Because it's my new lifestyle yo. I'm a gangster hoe.

Stefan: Could you go somewhere else please? You're driving me insane.

Damon: *claps Stefan on the shoulder* not without my homie! You mean everything to me man! Yo ma brother. Yeah! *drags Stefan*

Stefan: Someone just stake me already.

Damon: Stefan, I have a confession to make.

Stefan: *rolls eyes* It'll be surprising if it's something we already don't know about you.

Damon: I'm gay.

*awkward silence fills the room*

Stefan: Oh, so you have gotten over Katherine?

Damon: Yes, and I have finally found someone better then her.

Stefan: Oh really? Who?

Damon: You.

Stefan: I'm sorry Damon but I'm with Elena and plus we're brothers. I'm also not gay.

Damon: What if I kill her? Then will you turn gay?

Stefan: Damon, I am not gay. Period. The end. Now go away.

Damon: Fine! Some brother you are!

Damon: *crying softly*

Stefan: What is it now Damon?

Damon: *sniffles* I got a booboo! *Shows Stefan the tiny cut on his arm that is already fading away*

Stefan: Why do I suddenly feel like the older, much mature brother?

Damon: Yay candy mountain!

Elena: *whispers to Stefan* Why is he acting all weird?

Stefan: I don't know but I am this close to calling a physicatrist.

Damon: Oh look a fairy!

Edward: *twitch* I'm not a fairy I am a vampire!

Damon: Then why do you sparkle?

Stefan: Oh my god, Damon you can't just ask people why they sparkle! That's rude!

Damon: I was just curious! We don't sparkle!

Stefan: *leans close to Damon and whispers in his ear* That's because we are not vampire fairies.

Damon: Vampire fairies?

Stefan: Yes, vampire fairies. They look like him. *points to Edward*

Damon: *gasp* That means you are one too because you look just like him!

Stefan: Damon, I am not a vampire fairy. I do not sparkle.

Damon: Then why do you look like Edward?

Stefan: *throws hands up* I have no idea! Maybe the person who wrote Twilight was on crack and copied L.J's books! I'm pretty sure she was on crack when she wrote Twilight. Who else would be stupid enough to make vampires sparkle?

Damon: *looks confused* what do you mean?

Stefan: Never mind Damon.

Damon: *Singing* you've got a friend in me; you've got a friend in me!

Stefan: *gets a stake and stakes Damon*

Damon: *still singing* when there's trouble and you've got no one to turn to, you can always find a friend in me."

Stefan: *rams stake further in Damon's chest* why isn't he dying?

Damon: *singing* she was a girl, he was a boy. He wanted her, she couldn't tell, secretly she wanted him as well!

Stefan: *eyes widen* Damon is too far gone that not even wood will kill him! He's too stupid!

Damon: My momma said that I'm special.

Stefan: Damon, you didn't even know Mother!

Damon: But she said that I'm special!

Stefan: *shakes head*

Damon: *points to Elena* look! It's Katherine!

Stefan: That is not Katherine. That's Elena.

Damon: *tears running down his face* Katherine! I've missed you so much! *tackles Elena*

Elena: Damon! Get off of me now!

Damon: I wuv you so much my Katherine!

Stefan: He'll get off of you soon Elena.

Elena: *knees Damon in the groin, causing him to scream in pain*

Damon: *sings* Jesus loves the little children. All the children of the world!

Stefan: Ugh. He's not even religious!

A/N: I hoped you enjoyed that chapter! I might update it again but I'm not too sure. I need IDEAS people! Lol Please review!