Nothing about him had really changed. The ten years had aged his rugged features; he was even more handsome than I had remembered. He looked as if though he had gained 30 lbs of pure muscle. His hair blonde hair had darkened, and it was still a little below his chin, facial hair across his jaw line and outlining his mouth. The look in his eyes was pure exhaustion, not sure if it was from lack of sleep or the lifestyle he had been following since I had left.

He wore a blue hoodie, and a pair of baggy pants. Rings covering his fingers, chain from his wallet, knife hanging from his side. His kutte was hanging off his shoulders, the leather worn from years of use. The life had been hard on him, I could tell.

He studied my face, especially my eyes, looking for something. Forgiveness, relief, any sign that I was happy to see him.

I didn't know how I really felt about him standing there in front of me. In that moment though, the only thing I was really for sure about, was that I wanted his strong arms around me. I wanted to feel safe the way I did back then.

Tears started rolling down my face, and in that second he knew. He pulled me into him, wrapping his arms around me. I had always fit perfectly in his tall frame, like I was built just for him. All the anger, frustration, and disappointment I had felt when I left, melted away, and I was content right there, in his arms where I always thought I should have been.


Jax broke away from the kiss. A smile crossed his lips, he looked away, and a blush showed in his cheeks.

"I've wanted to do that all day, darlin'." A blush now filled my cheeks; it was my turn to look away. I bit my bottom lip, and before I could look away, he kissed me again, this time shorter but just as sweet.

"You think you might want to hang out with me and of my crew this weekend?" He said looking hopeful.

"I'd like that." I said, not hesitating to answer.

He smiled and wrapped his arm around me so I could lean into him. We sat in the silence, just enjoying each other's company.

The next few days wouldn't go fast enough. I couldn't wait to see what the weekend had planned. I was a little unsure about meeting his friends. Jax and I weren't really part of the same world. He kept reassuring me that they would love me; I had nothing to worry about.

Trying to get ready for that night seemed to take forever. Wanting my make-up and outfit just right. I finally settled on subtle eyeliner and mascara, nothing too over whelming. I pulled on a pair of tight fitting jeans that hung low on my hips, they were worn, with holes down the legs. I kept looking at my purchase from the day before that I had laid out on my bed. It wasn't really something you'd see me wearing but I loved the idea of it, not to mention it had looked amazing on me. It was tight fitting, sitting about 2 inches from the top of my jeans, showing off my stomach. On the back, there were cut outs like angel wings, exposing my bare back.

"Screw it!" I said out loud to myself, pulling the shirt on over my head. I finished the look with a pair of tan wedges that made me about 4 inches taller.

I let my hair fall out of the pony tail I had it in. I had beautiful flowing, red hair, but there was so much of it I hardly ever wore it down. Today I was going to. I curled the ends just to give it a bit of a wave.

I was ready and anxiously awaiting Jax's arrival. I rushed to the door when I heard the knock. I was a little nervous about his reaction, but when I opened the door he seemed pleased with what he saw.

"Holy shit Lex. I love the look. And your hair, wow." Jax said, trying to find words. I smiled at this. I didn't know what it was about him, or maybe it was even the outfit, but I felt edgy. I grabbed him by his shirt and pulled him into me, putting my lips against his. This time he slid his tongue across my lips, asking for permission to enter. Of course I let him. My hands found their way up his chest and around his neck, while his hands wondered down my sides and rested on my hips. The shirt was a good choice apparently.

I closed the door behind me. Jax had my hand as he lead me to his bike. He handed me a helmet and he got on. I lifted one leg to straddle his bike, and lowered myself on. He watched me as I did, with a grin on his face.

"What? Something wrong?" I asked.

"Babe, you don't want to know what I'm thinking about right now." He said with a wink. I wrapped my hands tightly around his waist, as we took off.

We pulled into a lot that looked to belong to a mechanic shop. The gathering was already in full swing. I was expecting for it just to be a group of kids our age, but everyone that surrounded us had to be late 20's early 30's. Everyone seemed to have a beer in hand and a cigarette hanging out of their mouth. I already felt over my head.

Sensing that I was uneasy, Jax grabbed my hand and kissed it. Keeping hold of my hand, he lead me to a group that was standing around a fire barrel. "I want to introduce you to some of my family." He said.

"This here is Opie, Donna, Chibs, Bobby, Opie's dad Piney, Tig, and that guy over there," He said pointing to an older man, wearing bandana around his head. "Is my step dad Clay, and the women he's got his arm around, is my mom Gemma."

I waved to everyone in the group. Donna and Opie both looked about our age. So I stayed close to them and Jax most of the time. Jax wandered off to the bathroom.

"I know it seems a little intimidating, they are great people. They look a little tough on the outside, but they are nothing to worry about. They're all family here." Donna said.

"Is it that apparent how terrified I am?" I said with a laugh.

"A little, but I was the same way the first time I came around. They'll warm up eventually."

Jax came back with a couple beers in his hand. He gave one to Opie and offered one to me. I had never had beer before, but I accepted it and took a drink. The longer we sat, the more I drank. A couple hours in and I was feeling really good. I was bullshitting with everyone around me.

"I think it might be time to cut you off." Jax said taking the beer from my hand. "I should probably get you home."

"Are you kiddin? My mom would kill me, besides she thinks I'm staying the night at a friend's place. I've got all night." I said winking at Jax.

"Oh is that so? Well let's get you to bed then, lightweight."

Jax led me into the building, which looked like a clubhouse. There was a bar, stocked full of alcohol, tables scattered around the room. Everyone looked to be in about the same state as I fell, ready to pass out. I wanted nothing more than to lay down and just fall asleep.

Jax took me into a room, and closed the door behind us.

"I've wanted to be alone with you all night." I said pulling Jax to me, pulling at his shirt.

"Woah babe, you don't know what you're doing. You've had way too much to drink." He said pushing my hands away.

"I know exactly what I'm doing, I want this." I kissed his lips, and down his chin, till I got to his neck. I pulled my shirt off over my head and started working on his. As much as he objected, he was having a hard time saying no to me.

I pushed him back onto the bed and started sliding my pants down my legs. He watched as I did so, stumbling to pull my legs out of my jeans. I straddled Jax as he lay back on the bed, his hands roaming my body and his mouth finding its way to my neck. Jax rolled me over, positioning himself on top of me. As soon as my head hit the pillow, I felt heavy, more tired than I ever thought I could be. Then I was out.


As Jax held me in his arms, the tears continued. I pulled away, not caring about anything else going on around me. I could hear my mom in the background. I pulled Jax to me and kissed him.

"I've missed you so fuckin bad. I'm so glad you're here" I said as I pulled away.