A/N: And now for some Hanna/{...} pr0nz-ier stuff. I wanted to make it so dirty that the mature content filter blushed, but maybe I'll save that for another chapter.
OH. And I only proofed this like maybe 3 times {which is 3-5 times less than usual} so please let me know if you catch any bad grammar problems or something~!
pqpq
Hanna Falk Cross never would have believed it, but he was actually good at the whole "dating" thing.
The hardest part of the entire process had been getting someone interested and then asking that question that initiated a meeting based on the mutual attraction of the parties involved. Afterward, it was a simple and not-so-scary-but-still-thrilling ride, where Hanna knew that Alex didn't mind holding hands when they could or brushing knees beneath the tables at the café or at the bar where Veser and his band played almost every weekend. And neither of them ever said no to the nightly kisses in the parking lot after work along with the same affection in the morning if they had a stolen moment or ten before opening. But, really, the whole dating things was awesome, because they were able to go out together on the weekends—hell, even the weekdays—and enjoy things that Hanna had always liked before, only now feeling an increase in his love for these activities because Alex was with him. It was strange how such simple things like going to the movies or the park or out for coffee or doing those stupid little five minute picture booth things could seem so different than they used to, now that he was ridiculously and very happily in love.
He used to hate people like them when he was miserably single, but because he no longer held that status in life, Hanna was living it up and…
It. Felt. Awesome.
During this time—past the dates and kisses and the wanting touches between them that were beginning to become more and more frequent—he learned more about Alexander Harper, who he had viewed simply as a gorgeous enigma who {for-some-reason-or-another that Hanna couldn't quite figure out} liked him. The more time they spent together, the more Hanna began to understand the complexities and paradoxes that animated the feelings of another individual. With this knowledge came the ability to be able to identify the usually unobtrusive emotional responses of his dark-haired partner, who did not wear his heart on his sleeve like Hanna had been accused of doing one too many times in his life. Alex was quiet and, not really secretive, but exclusive when it came to what he wanted to show and what he didn't. But Hanna could be observant when he wanted to—and in this instance, he really wanted to—and so he began picking up on these little subtleties. In the span of only a few weeks, Hanna began to understand some of his mannerisms and habits and came to the conclusion that his previous assumptions of perfection were incorrect. Alex was still deity-like in his attractiveness and unbelievably nice, but he was human, just like Hanna, which meant that he was not exempt from emotions like nervousness, insecurity, and discontent.
The redhead watched and became associated with Alex Harper, the person, not the sex God, and began to realize that there was so much more behind those uniquely pigmented eyes than what he had initially presumed.
He knew that Alex was not happy with his job—but then again, who was, especially when they worked where they did?—despite the fact that he always smiled to everyone, no matter how bad of a day he might be having. He could tell even more so as Hanna slowly began to put the pieces together: the stash of cookbooks and culinary magazines beneath the counter in the café and the recollection of the unfinished application to the Culinary Institute that was tucked under the passenger seat in Alex's car. When Hanna tried to bring it up—with just a simple question as to when he was considering applying to the school—he saw the way Alex's jaw tensed slightly as he made up some excuse or another as to why he was putting it off. The anxiety did not go unnoticed—the way his eyes would shift slightly to the side, the manner at which he suddenly started to nervously chew at the inside of his cheek or pick at his nails—but Hanna did not call him out on it, despite his want to do so. But since he hadn't mentioned anything about Hanna's own awkward actions, such as the stuttering and random bouts of flailing for no apparent reason, the redhead respected him enough and did not push anything.
And Alex was pretty good at distracting him from wanting to do so, too. There was no doubt about that.
"So…you wanted to show me the stockroom?" Hanna asked—naïve and curious—one Wednesday afternoon as he stepped into the small area that smelled heavily of fresh coffee and spices. Behind him, the door closed with a soft swish of air and left behind only the slightest bit of light from the bare, humming bulb which hung from the ceiling. Hanna then realized that they were very much alone and it was semi-dark and, oh so that's what it was about: that Alex certainly did not want to just give him a tour of the backroom for no reason except the privacy it offered from prying eyes and managers. The redhead felt his heart speed up incredibly fast at the concept of seduction and the thumping in his ears almost drowned out the sound of quiet footsteps coming closer to him. His entire body trembled as Alex's arms enveloped him from behind and—ohsweetJesus—those lips started lightly pressing the most gentle of kisses against his jaw and neck. It was amazing how something so soft could feel so hot and reduce Hanna to nothing but a pair of wobbly knees and a hardening cock.
"In a way, I guess I did," Alex said, and his voice was low with a slight bit of hoarseness that Hanna liked as much as the attention given to his ear, where the following words were whispered with a sensual honesty: "I've been thinking about getting you back here all day." Just the way he said it and the manner in which those lips toyed with Hanna's ear melded together in combination with the thought of possibly giving it up in such a naughty place, and it was enough to him whimper.
"A-Ale—" he gasped out, but could not even finish the name. This was because Hanna's lips found themselves suddenly preoccupied in a very nice manner as his body pressed flush against Alex's with his want quite obviously nudging against the taller man's thigh. They hadn't really ever made out before—like for seriously going at it like high schoolers by their lockers "making-out" making-out—so the experience was new and exciting and nerve-racking all at once and Hanna was already aroused despite the fact that they hadn't even done anything yet.
"Nn…" was the only sound Hanna could make to show that he liked it, standing on tiptoe to receive the affection. Although kissing Alex had become easier after their first few times and Hanna had lost the majority of his insecurities, doing something a little different was bringing him back to where he had been previously: unsure of what to do with his hands and his mouth—was he supposed to close his eyes and which way was he supposed to turn his head again?—and holycrap Alex was trying to French him and Hanna had no clue how to respond. He could only let him in and feel his mind lose all coherent thought at the hot rush of a sweet-tasting tongue against his.
{At least now he knew that there were fireworks after all, like the huge ones they used after baseball games or at Disney World or some shit like that, because they were amazing and bright and spectacular and even loud all at once in his head.}
Trying not to over-think things and thereby freak himself out, Hanna focused instead on what he could feel—the hot tongue in his mouth and the palms holding his cheeks and the closeness of their bodies like in all those dreams that Hanna woke from, aching and sticky—as he pulled Alex closer to him in a desperately needy fashion. Sure, he'd never done any of this before, but Hanna realized that it took spontaneous tactics of his own and a bit of mimicking to get the job done. His enthusiastic response was apparently the correct one, because it prompted Alex to pin him against the nearest stainless steel rack, which would have been uncomfortable if Hanna hadn't been so immersed in the moment and the lips against his and the hands that strayed from his cheeks down his back and then under his shirt and—
"Ah…" Hanna panted when they came up for air. His glasses were slightly foggy, so Hanna could only see the bit of light over Alex's shoulder and the red glow of the EXIT sign above the door and, Gods, Alex had started mouthing his way down Hanna's throat hungrily. It dragged a small moan from Hanna, who clutched at Alex's shoulders like his life depended on it—because really, he felt like he might fall off the face of the planet and be thrust out into space if he let go—which only seemed to urge him on. He was swiftly moved up along the shelf and his body then found itself supported by Alex's knee, putting Hanna in a better position for the both of them. Curling his leg slightly around Alex and enjoying the sensation of being almost as tall as the other man, Hanna then felt his shirt entirely removed from where it had been tucked into his belt. The quick motion let the one-size-too-big uniform out with enough room for Alex's hands to continue roaming along the redhead's back. And, Lord have mercy, his palms were so warm and calloused and amazing. Together with the small biting, sucking kisses to his neck and the electrifying feel of Alex's rough stubble against his skin, these affections were enough to make Hanna embarrassingly hard and he blushed redder than he ever had in his life.
It was difficult not to notice, Hanna presumed, because he was horny to the point where he was shamelessly rubbing against Alex's hip in search of relief.
But thankfully Alex didn't seem to care and when Hanna got his breath back, they were kissing again and it was getting easier—because even Hanna didn't seem like a fast learner, he actually was—and, ohmanohmanohman, Alex's fingers were toying the Hanna's belt like yes, fuck, YES! He hesitated only momentarily, but after Hanna encouraged him with another small moan and the movement of his hips closer to his hand, Alex began working at the buckle at his previous pace. When it came undone, those nimble fingers unbuttoned Hanna's jeans before pulling the zipper down at an unfairly slow pace.
Alex gave him his tongue back for a moment and said his name in a husky whisper: "Hanna?"
"Hnm," was Hanna's reply, because his lips and tongue were heavy, feeling deliciously swollen with the lingering taste of Alex and in his pleasure-addled mind, Hanna could only wonder why he stopped. If he had paused to ask permission, that was sweet and everything, but that meant that Alex wasn't touching his cock and Hanna just wanted him to effing do it already. Before he could ask, Hanna forced his heavy lids to open so that he could look up at the other man. It was too dark to see if he was as flushed as Hanna, but the redhead knew that he was been enjoying it just by looking into his eyes. They had gone a darker, more syrupy shade of golden brown that was the fucking epitome of lusty and it made Hanna long for his touch even more. "Pl-Please..." he whispered in a yearning, craving tone that Hanna had read about and maybe used once or twice—or all the time—in dreams, but never knew he could produce in reality before that moment.
And it was either Hanna's politeness or the slight shift of his hips that did it, because the redhead then realized that he wasn't the only one enjoying things, if the ridge against the underside of his thigh was anything to go by.
Holy. Shit.
Hanna's mind raced with those two words over and over again when he let the situation sink in: they were in a back room at work, making out like never before, and Alex was hard and Hanna was most definitely the same way, which was made all the better when they started kissing again and the redhead felt himself pushed so hard into the shelf that it hurt, but in a way that was strangely good. Hanna locked his arms around his shoulders, fingers gripping into that soft, dark hair when Alex's hand dipped below the waistband of Hanna's boxers and—
Mother of—
You could touch yourself as much as you wanted and bring release through those means, but until someone else did it to you, you had no idea what you were missing. It was in that moment that Hanna realized his hand would never cut it again because Alex's hand was around him and it was hotter than anything he'd ever felt before. The calloused pads of his fingers and palm were enough to make Hanna pull out of their kiss, unable to use his tongue while trying to breathe and moan at the same time. He was reduced to just making needy, incoherent sounds that did not classify as words in the slightest as his fingers clenched in Alex's hair. He stroked at the perfect pace and applied pressure at all the right times and, yes, Alex's thumb rubbed around the tip of his cock, smearing heat and wetness all over the head and shaft.
Hanna wanted to scream because it felt so fucking good.
And really, he wanted to last, but it was too hot and good and, holy crap, he was getting his first ever handjob by the most gorgeous man on the planet, which just sent Hanna to the edge too soon for his liking. He tried to get out a warning, but Hanna couldn't even make a sound, let alone a word, and silently felt the rapid build-up to completion. It had been that steady, burning feeling in the area just behind his navel, increasing as the moments had worn on, like lava churning beneath the earth before a volcanic eruption. Hanna could feel it rising in him like magma as the ache intensified, wanting release, and that sensation made his back stiffen, as if something had grabbed hold of his spine and would not let him move an inch. Almost like a knee-jerk reaction, his thighs clenched around Alex and his cock felt like it was just going to explode and he wanted it to so bad, while at the same time wishing he could ride it out just a little longer. But Hanna couldn't and his head fell back against the shelf as he tried to breathe and moan and hold on all at once. His last ditch effort was in vain, because when Alex gave him another small squeeze, it sent him cresting and Hanna was cumming like he had never had in his life. Just the force of it made his body tremble and caused his vision to blank to white with pure euphoria, easing into darkness only after the last aftershocks of pleasure had coursed through him.
If that's what it was like to have Alex touch him with just his hand, Hanna had no idea what sex was going to be like. Probably spectacular enough to send him into a coma.
With the thought of a coma, and then Alex, and then sex, Hanna found himself coming back to his senses slowly. It was to warmth and a sated exhaustion and a bit of stickiness, but that wasn't what Hanna concerned himself with, instead focusing on the slightly blurry, yet worried expression hovering a few inches from him.
"Hanna?" Alex said, and touched his cheek.
"Hmm...?" Hanna managed, smiling sleepily and completely pleased up at him.
"Are you okay?" he asked, and there was a smile on his lips too that just made Hanna feel warm and gooey inside. Actually, a bit on the outside as well, but in an awesome way.
"Good," Hanna said, through somewhat panting breaths. He closed his eyes and leaned back against the shelf again. "Amazing." It was after he spoke this word that Hanna realized they were sitting on the stockroom's cool linoleum floor and when Hanna had a bit more of his comprehension come back to him, he asked, confused: "Why're we on the floor?"
Alex looked a bit sheepish and rubbed the back of his neck.
"You kind of...passed out..." he said apologetically, and Hanna flushed with embarrassment. How lame was he to be rendered unconscious from a handjob that lasted maybe all of three minutes? Three minutes of pure heaven, don't get him wrong, but still, how lame was that? Hanna never wanted to show his face again and he kind of wanted to die a little too. That was until Alex kissed him in a gentle, reassuring manner and said: "Hey, don't look like that. It's a compliment."
"Howizzit a compliment?" Hanna asked, and Alex chuckled in that way that just made the redhead warm all over.
"It means I'm not as rusty as I thought," he replied and Hanna was red, especially when he felt a cool draft of air caress his flaccid cock and, oh crap, he'd almost forgotten that he wasn't the only one who had been enjoying everything. So, maybe Hanna was okay at the dating thing, but he was certainly bad at the whole being-a-good-boyfriend thing when it came to sex and that just planted a seed of paranoia inside of him so that Hanna's thoughts raced with the possibilities of Alex leaving him because it wasn't cutting it enough for him physically. Hanna did not want that to happen, just as much as he didn't want some giant meteor to hit the Earth, because without Bruce Willis and an amazing track by Aerosmith, it would just be fucking tragic. With the knowledge that he had to do something and fast, Hanna mustered up his courage and decided to use the information he'd consumed from all those stupid movies and books that he never would admit to utilizing in real life. His mission? To convince Alex the Sex Muffin Harper that he wasn't a complete failure in bed.
"I'm sorry, though..." Hanna said, and locked his gaze with Alex's as he moved his—slightly shaking with anxiety and other fits of nervous everything at what he was about to do—arms around those broad shoulders.
"Don't apologize," Alex replied, and Hanna knew that his plan was working just by still-syrupy colored eyes that became half-lidded by the light, flirtatious touches to his short hair.
"T-Then can I..." Hanna began, and even let his arm fall from Alex's shoulder with more balls than he thought he possessed, going so far to smooth his palm down the front of his orange shirt, fingers catching only slightly on the belt before landing upon his thigh and... bingo. Whoa, now that was impressive.
Toni had been right about the whole shoe size thing after all.
Hanna pressed his hand a bit more firmly against it as he moved closer, taking in the way Alex's eyelashes fluttered slightly at the touch and the near-silent intake of breath that said without saying how much Alex did not mind the sly caress. And man, it was so erotic watching as his eyes got darker the closer Hanna's fingers crept under the green apron and towards the zipper of his jeans, because the redhead was determined to return the favor and it was just like touching himself, right, so it wasn't like he wouldn't know what to do with an identical piece of equipment right?
Right?
He was seriously just centimeters away from Alex's cock and Hanna's heart started racing again, pumping heat and arousal through his veins so that he felt the stirrings of life in his spent member, and just brought their lips together for some more delicious making out when—
The door opened, casting harsh florescent light into their previously dimly lit lovenest.
"What the—ohmygodI'msosorry—" was the jumbled apology from the door, where Tiffany stood with her eyes wide and her hands over her mouth and shit Hanna had been so close and then—
Wait. Wait. Wait.
Hanna realized that looked even worse than he thought, because his pants were undone and all his junk was just out there and it was obvious exactly where the redhead's hand was beneath Alex's apron, which—to make things even worse—was covered in fresh, damp blotches where Hanna had cum. Only three words entered into Hanna's mind:
Fuck.
Shit.
Damn.
pqpq
Tiffany quit.
She just outright, in a quiet flurry of blond hair and too-big-to-be-natural breasts, turned around and threw her apron onto the ground and quit. Hanna found out after the fact—because they rushed to clean up and escape before she set the alarm or something and Hanna guiltily crept back to the stacks while Alex was left with the aftermath of her resignation and the erection that had not been taken care of—and was told by Toni later that afternoon, who was informed by Veser during her break, that Tiffany had apparently been lusting after Alex since he started.
"She was jealous and couldn't take it," Toni told him, and she was wickedly grinning as they reorganized the historical reference section. "She was jealous of you."
"That's...just weird..." Hanna mumbled, though his cheeks were warm with a feeling of pleasant victory. No one had ever been jealous of him ever, because no one had ever wanted to be him before. The feeling of superior awesomeness was probably bad for his ego.
"So speaking of the reason for her jealousy, I have a feeling that it was something Tiffany saw," Toni said in a prompting sort of manner. She shifted the arm holding the stack of Roman military tomes as she looked slyly over at Hanna, who was trying to ignore her stare. "You know. Something that she could not unsee?"
"I don't know...whatyou'retalkingabout," Hanna mumbled, and he was feeling hot.
"Something happened~!" Toni said.
"Nothing happened," Hanna replied, and pulled at the collar of his shirt nervously.
"No, you were definitely being naughty," Toni said in a knowing manner, stepping closer to him. "Oh, man, did she walk in on you guys doing the dirty?"
"We weren't doingthedirty," Hanna coughed out, and his blush was so intense he felt like he had a horrible sunburn.
"Aha! So you were doing something and she just happened to walk in on you!" Toni said, jabbing him in the arm with her finger.
"We weren't doing anything, I swear," Hanna replied.
"You're a horrible liar."
"N-No, I'm serious. We didn't do anything."
"Hickies don't appear by themselves, Hanna."
Immediately, his hand went to his neck. Where his fingers pressed against certain parts of the flesh, it almost felt as if he had small bruises.
"H-Holy f—is it really noticeable?" Hanna whispered.
"No...not at all..." Toni said unconvincingly.
"Dammit, Toni, tell me for real," Hanna said.
"It's not nice when your friends tell lies, is it?" Toni asked, cocking her head to the side to make her point clear.
"Toni..." Hanna began in apology, but was silenced when Toni leaned closer to him to ask in a conspiratorial-sounding whisper:
"Did he go down on you?"
"N-No…" Hanna said, and began to feel a little uncomfortable. After all, it was the mark of a gentleman to never kiss, get jerked off, and then tell about it.
"Mmhmm," was her unbelieving response, followed by a wide eyed inquiry: "Oh my god, did you at least give that man a handjob?"
"Er...not exactly..." Hanna replied, and his voice was low with shame and embarrassment as he recalled the needy, wanting expression Alex had made in the dark when Hanna touched him. God, he'd made Alex horny—which was awesome, because Hanna doubted that anyone had ever become so aroused because of him—and then just left him there, unsatisfied.
Hanna was such an asshole.
"You're bad at this whole being-a-boyfriend thing, aren't you?" Toni asked, making Hanna's self-esteem plummet further. "I mean, jeez, you just peaced out? Poor guy's probably got to rub one out by himself now."
"You're not helping, Toni…" Hanna said miserably.
"Holy shit," Toni murmured, as if she'd realized something. "You mean Tiffany really did see you guys and you weren't finished yet?"
"Let's not talk about this anymore…" Hanna replied, and focused very hard on making sure the alphabetization was done correctly with their new orders. It was the only way he could get Alex's flushed cheeks and darkened eyes out of his mind without wanting to rip his hair out in frustration. But even as Toni quieted and they returned to work in silence, Hanna could still taste Alex and feel those hot palms against his skin, recalling the way he'd been touched and kissed and then brought to release. Just the recollection made the redhead think about everything he didn't want to: the exhilarating way their tongues meshed together and the electrifying feel of the semi-rough stubble on Alex's chin, but most of all, that desperate little half-breath Alex had taken in when Hanna touched him and didn't finish…
"Fuck…" Hanna mumbled to himself, and the guilt felt like a weight in his chest.
"Why don't you make it up to him in the parking lot tonight?" Toni suggested, and Hanna had the sneaking suspicion she might be a mind-reader. "Or better yet, just go home with him."
"N-No, I can't…" Hanna replied, shoving a book about Julius Caesar onto the shelf with more force than necessary. There was no way he could do such a thing, even though he kind-of-no-actually-really-wanted-to have Alex take him back to his place—which he still had not seen, but certainly imagined when he was alone at night—so that they could have a bit more privacy than just the stolen moments outside by their cars, or at the cafés and restaurants and bars and parks and everywhere else they seemed to go besides the mattress. Hanna didn't want to seem fast—because he liked Alex too much to ruin it just because he was sex-starved and needing to get laid before he turned 25, thank you very much—but he just couldn't help but want Alex on every possible level.
"Why not?" Toni asked, and Hanna didn't think he could describe it, so he shrugged and replied with a simple:
"I just can't, okay?"
"You're scared, aren't you?"
Hanna nearly dropped the book entitled Alexander the Great onto his foot. Upon seeing the title, Hanna frowned and turned it over so that he didn't have to look at the name that already haunted his dreams—but in a very nice way, don't get him wrong—and every waking thought. And speaking of Alexander the Great, Alexander Harper was pretty great, all the time with his words and his smiles at just the right time and the way he made Hanna coffee with all his favorite shapes and then there were those kisses and his hands and, shit, it just made him think about what they did and how awesome it was, but at the same time, how much Hanna sucked for not reciprocating.
"I-I'm not scared," Hanna said, trying not to get too distracted from the tasks at hand.
"You're lying," Toni replied and flipped some of her hair over her shoulder as she kneeled onto the ground to squeeze a large volume about gladiators into an impossibly small space. "Everyone's scared their first time."
"Can we…not talk about my virginity?" Hanna asked, and his voice was a little too high to be natural.
"Look, Hanna, just don't freak out about it," Toni said, and looked up at him. There was just sincere honesty and no trace of the slightest bit of teasing in her eyes, making Hanna's tensed shoulders relax slightly. "It's okay to be scared, but don't be so afraid that you're not yourself. You won't enjoy anything that way and neither will he."
"Dammit, I just don't know what to do," Hanna admitted, and crouched down next to her to help her with the large volume.
"About what?"
"About any of it."
"Watch porn."
"Toni, I'm serious."
"No, seriously. Watch porn."
Hanna felt like his ears were on fire.
"Either that or read Cosmo," Toni suggested, jamming the book into its proper place.
"Cosmo?" Hanna asked, incredulously.
"Hey, it'll give you some good tips," she said. Hanna looked skeptical as he stood up.
"Cosmo?"
"Cosmo."
pqpq
In Hanna's opinion, Cosmo had to be the dirtiest magazine on the planet.
It had been embarrassing enough walking into that part of the aisle, but even more so when he picked up one of the pink, glossy rags to read it, especially because one of the main headlines read: 50 Experimental Tips to Spice up Your Sex Life. Hanna flipped through the magazine quickly and saw that there was everything from discussions about condoms—holy crap, Hanna forgot there were different sizes which made him wonder just how big Alex really was because, shit, he'd touched it but not really and, shitfuckdamn it was too embarrassing to think about—to a breakdown of what guys liked and didn't like in bed. He actually became immersed in an article with the title: 5 Simple Steps to Mind-Blowing Oral Sex and could not believe how much it sounded like rocket science to him. There were too many factors to consider—length, thickness, circumcised, uncircumcised, etc—and too many risks and warnings that advised not to involve teeth or pull or suck too hard and, shit, there were so many ways that it could go wrong…
"Hey," came a voice from behind him, and Hanna let out an eeep! of surprise when he realized who it was.
Talk about things going wrong.
"What're you reading?" was Alex's curious question. When Hanna turned around, he realized he was doomed, because he was standing in front of the Cosmo shelf with a very-obviously feminine magazine in his hand while Alex was putting back a stolen copy of one culinary journal or another and Hanna wanted to fucking run away. How embarrassing was it that he had to read a girl's magazine to get some idea as to what to do with the man right in front of him in bed?
"N-Nothing!" Hanna said quickly, but in doing so, raised his hands and flashed the cover of the magazine at him. The word SEX was probably the part that was seen, because it was Hanna's bad luck and the universe conspiring against him to just be full of fail. He hurried to think of an excuse and got out a hasty: "T-Toni asked me to pick this up so I did and wasn't reading it or anything like that because that's just weird and, haha, never mind, I'm gonna go…" He was just three steps away from his initial spot when Hanna felt his hand grasped in a gentle hold.
"Hanna," he said, and when Hanna looked at him, he saw the concern in those golden-brown eyes shining through more than ever.
"Yeah…?" Hanna asked, and it was in that same weak sort of way he'd spoken on the first night they'd ever spoken for more than twenty seconds. And just after Hanna had thought he'd gotten over his awkwardness, he had been transformed into his previous nervously apprehensive self.
"Are you okay?"
"'mfine."
"Are we okay?"
And the way he asked it nearly made Hanna want to cry, because the look on his face told him that Alex believed he was the one who had done something wrong. Shaking slightly, Hanna moved his fingers through Alex's, trying to keep his mind from recalling the excellent way he had been touched by those same digits. Despite those wonderful sensations, Hanna still felt awful and gave him a similar, guilty look.
"Are we okay?" Hanna asked, and glanced over his shoulder to make sure they were alone before stepping closer. "I mean, I-I, after everything, you know, and I didn't, for you, like—"
"It's okay," he said, and he actually looked a bit relieved at Hanna's response. He smiled in a way that Hanna found comforting; the redhead breathed out a sigh, thankful that somehow, Alex knew exactly what he wanted to say, even when he couldn't say it properly. "And yeah, I mean, I would have liked you to, but it wasn't like you could. The whole thing was kind of my fault to begin with. I shouldn't have brought you back there…"
"B-but it was awesome," Hanna retorted, and then instantly felt guilty, so said in a rush: "I-I m-mean, it would have been better if you, you know, did too, but I mean—" He stopped when Alex looked like he was trying not to grin at his stutter.
"I got it," he said and it was amazing how he could go from looking so generally nice to completely lusty in the span of mere seconds. Hanna suddenly very much wanted to just do him right there in the aisle. "So I'll just take a rain-check, then."
"Y-Yeah, sounds good," Hanna replied, feeling slightly saddened when Alex's hand dropped from his.
"Later," he said.
"Bye…"
Hanna stood there, grinning like an idiot as he clutched the November issue of Cosmo in his hand, relieved in knowing that the hot ass walking away was still his.
Because Tiffany quit, the responsibilities of the café fell mostly on Alex and Veser.
Their other co-worker, Vicky the Semi-Hot Lesbian, was taking finals at her university in Portland, so she only showed up for random shifts closer to the weekends, leaving Alex and Veser to be the two full-time lapdogs of the place. It made that rain check a little harder to come by, because Alex was so busy during the day and stayed even later than he ever had at night. Hanna loitered a bit during the time between when he got off his shift and when Alex was released from his punishment so that they could walk to their cars together. When they would leave the store, Hanna would hold Alex's hand as the two of them navigated across the slippery asphalt in silence. At the car, Hanna would stand on tiptoe to kiss him and Alex would hold him and kiss him back, but it felt exhausted and lacked its usual mind-numbing heat. It wasn't his fault, so Hanna was not angry and did not express his disappointment, but that did not stop him from going home to release some of his frustrations alone.
But after Alex had touched him, nothing felt quite like it and the redhead went to bed dissatisfied quite a few times.
All of it was because of Tiffany, whom, upon quitting, had spurred the manager to come in himself to oversee the place and who decided that he was going to be a cruel and unusual son of a bitch. Veser had a better name for him, but it involved too many swears about one's mother and other sexually abusive language for Hanna to remember, so he was just going to roll with the original sonofabitch option. Hanna hadn't had the pleasure of meeting this asshole, but closer to Thanksgiving—when things were more strained than usual—the redhead finally had that unpleasant opportunity. His name was Ples Tibenoch and he spoke with an accent that was rather annoying in Hanna's opinion—probably because everything was annoying about the person who was standing between him and Alex's usually epic, planetary axis-shifting kisses—and this feigned sort of politeness made his insults more complicated than they needed to be with such an advanced form of syntax.
"He's fuckin' crazy," Veser confided to Hanna, that day he met Mr. Tibenoch, when he stumbled across the green-eyed teen hiding in Multimedia with Toni on his way to the café. "Don't go over there. I'm telling you that you'll regret it."
But Hanna wanted to see Alex and the fear of meeting his bat-shit crazy manager was not a deterrent, especially when he had his own Velociraptor bitch of a supervisor breathing down his neck in a very similar manner to the vicious dinosaur in question. When he arrived at the café, Alex was cleaning and looking a bit dejected behind the counter, but upon seeing Hanna, brightened considerably. Even though Hanna could see the tiredness around his eyes, it still made his day to see Alex smile.
"Hey," Hanna said, and approached the counter.
"Hey," he replied, and without Hanna even having to ask, began to prepare his usual order.
"Is everything okay?" Hanna asked, glancing towards the back, expecting the monster of a boss to come rampaging through the wall, like the rhinos and shit in Jumanji.
"Yeah, just kind of…" Alex began, but stopped and didn't continue. Hanna understood without him having to say anything at all, and was about to reply when he paused as well. There was a strange sound coming from the back room, which reminded Hanna of a clock somehow with its tick tick tick tok tick tok ticking and such. Hanna's mind immediately went from clock to bomb—before dashing to the show 24 with Kiefer Sutherland, but that was only for like half a second because Jack Bauer was the most amazing thing ever—too quickly. And maybe Mr. Tibenoch was a ticking time bomb, because he certainly seemed that way when he appeared, ushering a pale, dark-haired man with him as he walked with a self-possessed importance that was quite revolting. When he saw Hanna at the counter, the redhead watched as his eyes peeked down over his abnormally long nose before moving disdainfully over the spotlessly clean counter top to where Alex was making his drink. He sniffed and then pulled out a gold pocket watch from his pinstripe—but not sexy, not like Alex's, just so that was a million percent clear—vest.
"Mr. Harper, did you complete the list that I left for you?" he asked.
"Almost everything," Alex replied vaguely; Hanna could tell that he was very much irked by the man's presence, and probably his ticking too, because that would just get fucking ridiculous. Mr. Tibenoch snapped his watch shut with an annoyed sniff. The sound continued and Hanna wondered why. Maybe his Timex was broken or something.
"Please make sure that you attend to your duties and apply yourself to them completely. If you do not, then I will most certainly know about it and that is something that I will not tolerate, understood?" Mr. Tibenoch asked. Hanna wondered how Alex managed to not beat him repeatedly with the end of a broomstick.
"Yes, sir," Alex said.
"Well, time is wasting," he said, and looked at Hanna. He felt as if he were being scrutinized by some sort of robot, and as Hanna was reconsidering his previous assumptions about the improbability of Skynet and the take over the Machines like in the Terminator series, the man sniffed at him to get his attention. Hanna realized he was blatantly staring at his uniform and name tag—which was better than the hickies, which Hanna had managed to cover up with some sort of magical girl cream that Toni's friend had brought with her to conceal her acne—but the redhead prided himself in doing an awesome job of not fidgeting under his gaze. "And you should get back to work, young man. We must all be working together in flawless harmony to make a place such as this tick perfectly and precisely on time, which means on schedule."
"I'm on break," Hanna said, and did not miss the way that Alex almost dropped his cinnamon canister at the response. It looked like he was trying desperately hard not to look entertained, because Mr. Tibenoch didn't and just kind of made an annoyed sound before turning to the other man behind the counter.
"I presume that since you've transferred and have experience that you can start today," he said and before the pale, bespectacled man could say a word otherwise, Mr. Tibenoch left from behind the counter and strolled into the store. Hanna could hear his watch ticking and tocking loudly even as he disappeared.
Everyone was very quiet until they could no longer hear him.
"Man, does anyone else want to push that guy down a fucking flight of stairs?" said the new guy.
Hanna snorted in an attempt not to laugh, but couldn't help it and Alex was trying to hide his entertainment, but a grin fixed itself upon his lips anyway. And that was how Conrad Achenleck became their ally and friend.
Begrudged, but still definitely a friend.
pqpq
Hanna thought that Veser played at the gayest-sounding club in Portland, and that was saying something coming from him.
It was called The Squeeze and was located in a sketchy part of town that was probably built on booze and cocaine, but then again, what wasn't in the 60s anyway? It was old and shoddy and a little freaky to be driving around in such a bad area, but Hanna was still pretty stoked despite all of this, because he and Alex drove up together that night after the store closed. It was the first time since Mr. Lameass Tibenoch had appeared that they'd been together for more than a few minutes, and Hanna was very keen on using their time wisely by having Alex cash in that rain check, because he'd finally done his homework.
As in, he watched porn.
It was awkward, but actually quite educational, Hanna discovered. And though he felt guilty jerking off to two other dudes getting it on, the redhead knew that the ends would satisfy the means so long as it helped him make Alex's night awesome. Because, really, he wanted to see his expression when he came. Something told him it would be fucking fantastic.
So.
They had just returned from the bar—where Hanna had some trouble convincing the barkeep that he was indeed 24 and, no, it wasn't fake ID, and yes, he was telling the truth, so help him—and it was loud, but Veser's band was actually not half-bad, so that was okay. Maybe a little scream-o, but still pretty good and the bass pounded in Hanna's ears, effectively blocking out any thumping of his heart he might experience when he trailed his fingers lightly over Alex's thigh beneath the table. Toni was watching the band and Conrad—who hadn't wanted to come, but was dragged along by an over-enthusiastic Toni, who probably wanted a designated driver so that when she drank herself into a coma, she would at least not die in fiery wreck too—didn't seem to give a shit what they were doing because he was trying to avoid the affection of a pretty girl who had dropped into the booth next to him. With these distractions, Hanna pretended to be watching the musicians from their seat and the gyrating mess of bodies in the pit before the stage, but really, he had been observing the way Alex's fingers clenched around his drink at the touch, the knuckles turning whiter the further Hanna moved up his leg.
"Hanna," Alex said, leaning closer to the redhead's ear so that he could actually hear him over the blasting music. He sounded a bit excited, though was obviously trying to control it. That just made Hanna want to do him even more, especially when he asked: "What're you doing?"
"You," was Hanna's reply, because he just couldn't help it. Sure, he was nervous about making such a bold move, but had already had half his drink and was so crazy about Alex that even that didn't matter. And, damn, did Alex give him an expression that made Hanna feel hot and bothered, sending the stirrings of heat inside himself growing like a forest fire that would make Smoky the Bear run away screaming like a little bitch. But anyway. The sensation was all because of him because there was just something about Alex looking pleased, but slightly nervous, and overall horny that was just unf.
And Hanna found it absolutely amazing that he could make someone feel that way.
It was more intoxicating than the alcohol, watching Alex's expression, and more addicting than any drug—though maybe that wasn't true, because the only drug Hanna had ever done was pot and that was two hits at some friend's birthday party in college, but it hadn't really done anything except make lights brighter and make him paranoid as fuck—when he felt tremble of muscle beneath his palm which let him know he was definitely doing it right. What followed was so subtle that someone who did not know Alex would never have guessed what his feelings were at that moment, but Hanna could tell and it became a bit harder to breathe; something so simple as the manner in which his eyes darkened and the heaviness to his lids and the way he parted his lips in a way that was just so fuckable that Hanna felt his own cock rise to the occasion.
Oh, what price he would pay just to have that mouth on him.
The thought was almost unbearable.
"Guess this means you want me to use my rain check, hm?" he said, and it was kind of unfair when he placed his palm against Hanna's hip and moved it over the fabric of his jeans. It was wonderfully distracting, but Hanna had resolved that he was going to return the favor and could not forget himself before that happened. And he tried to give Alex a sexy smile, although it probably came out more coy and hesitant than anything.
"I do," Hanna replied and, Christ, they were in public, but he could not stop rubbing his hand against the front of Alex's pants. Beside him, Toni was screaming out lyrics with the song being played and Conrad was being openly molested by the girl with dark hair at the end of their booth while Hanna was undoing the buckle of Alex's jeans, one-handed like a pro, beneath the table. It might have been a combination of the flashing lights and pounding music mixed in with too much rum and coke that made Hanna so brazen, but dammit, he was enjoying things and—if the bulge beneath his palm was anything to go by—Alex was certainly enjoying things and it was dark enough, right?
"Oh my God! Where are you putting your hand?"
When that exclamation reached Hanna's ears, he immediately retracted his hand—which was almost beneath the waistband of Alex's underwear {briefs, by the way, niiiiice}–as if he'd been burned, feeling instantly guilty that they'd been caught again. Alex definitely looked disappointed and Hanna felt the same way when he realized that the question had been Conrad's, barked at the vixen that was all up on him in an attempt to have very quick and casual sex with him.
"Don't be such a pussy," the woman chided, and left a purple kiss on Conrad's cheek. "And call me by my name, darling."
"I don't want to know your name!" Conrad hissed at her, and his eyes were pleading silently at Hanna and Alex to save him.
"It's Adelaide," she purred and Conrad's desperation to be saved increased by over nine thousand.
"What kind of name is that? Are you a fucking hooker or what?" Conrad asked and she laughed, gripping his hair in a way that made Hanna feel awkward and embarrassed all at once, because he'd done the same thing to Alex back in the storeroom and made a mental note to ask if it hurt as much as it looked like it did.
"If my boyfriend comes around, you have to tell him that one," she said.
"B-boyfriend?" was Conrad's response, as he tried to scoot away, bumping right into Alex in the process. His pale fingers clutched at the table as he leaned in to whisper to them: "Oh my god, you guysbetterfuckingsaveme."
"Come on, you," Adelaide said, and grinned maniacally as she added: "I'm gonna make you my bitch."
"W-What the fuck—!" Conrad got out, before he was yanked right out of the booth by the leather-clad sassy vixen. The last thing Hanna heard over the music and Adelaide's laughter was his scream: "I didn't even want to COME HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE!"
Hanna just stared after him, a bit confused and put out that Conrad had made such a scene and distracted them in the first place. But still, Conrad—whom had been dubbed Connie by Hanna and Confags by Veser—was a part of their group and hopefully did not lose his virginity with the hot dominatrix with the possibly irate boyfriend. And speaking of virginity, Hanna was never going to lose his if people kept interrupting them all the fucking time.
"Er...maybe we should go after him..." Hanna said, though the disappointment bled into his voice at the thought of abandoning the table and Alex's half-opened pants to go search for Connie in the dark of the club.
"Yeah, we probably should," Alex replied, but didn't move from his spot. He was looking hot and sly and, yes, that was his hand traveling up from Hanna's knee in the most enticing of manners again, saying plainly that he felt the same way about not wanting to leave, and heck yes this was like the green light to everything awesome. But when he was caught in that gaze, the redhead swallowed because his eyes were just so hungry and the first two buttons of Alex's jeans were still undone, damn, he remembered how badly he wanted to just go all out tonight. Then, when Alex kissed him—tasting minty and sweet, like his Mojito—it was that heated, mind-numbing contact that Hanna had been craving for what felt like a million years.
"We're bad friends..." Hanna murmured against his lips.
"We are bad friends," Alex conceded, but neither of them did anything to remedy that status. Because, yeah, Hanna had vertigo like he had been on a rollercoaster for three days and the beat of the music was awesome for making out. It was that same sort of kiss from the storeroom that was just hot and needy and this was all while Alex touched him, rubbing gently against the front of Hanna's pants with the heel of his palm, matching in time with the music and everything. And, finally, Hanna was so close, where his fingers were just about to slip further beyond the waistband—just a tad, and he felt nothing but heat and the coarse bit of hair that was so amazing it equated to nothing but gibberish in Hanna's mind—when—
"Get a room or something, JEEZUS."
It was Veser.
And Toni.
And the rest of the band.
And the band's groupies.
And probably the band's groupies' moms too, for all Hanna knew, because fuck, where had all these people come from? And why was it that every time the two of them were close to getting something done, it was completely interrupted? And so embarrassingly too, because really, there's no discreet way to pull one's hand out of another person's pants. Try it sometime.
Yeah. Exactly.
"Uh...s-s-so, Veser, good show. Y-yeah, good show guys..." Hanna tried, but all the band members looked freaked and somewhat embarrassed while Veser just appeared as annoyed as usual. Toni was the only one who looked happy for him, despite the awkward situation, where Hanna tried to act normal as a very red Alex quickly buckled his belt back up beneath the table.
"Get lost, fags, we need the table," Veser said, jabbing his thumb over his shoulder in a gesture to get lost. Alex actually gave him the finger before tugging Hanna along by the hand to get out of the booth.
"Where's Conrad?" Toni asked over the music, as a beer was shoved into her hand by one of the older members of the group. Hanna shrugged at her as he was led through the dancing crowd, intent on drinking himself into a coma at the rate his bad luck was just doing its best to keep him and Alex from achieving much of anything. He ordered a rum and coke the minute they were at the bar, and downed it so quickly that it burned his throat.
"Hanna?"
It was Alex and he was close, smelling like mint and freshness and, huh, the rum was pretty good after a third drink because it tasted like cinnamon. It was almost as good as the arm that moved around him and the lips that brushed against his ear when Alex asked him what was wrong.
"'snothing," Hanna replied, shaking his head only once, because more than that made his vision blurry and the lights from above the bar blur together in lines of glowsticks from the dance floor, streaming into beams of purple, magenta, and gold tinted a slight shade of emerald. Hanna ordered a forth drink, because he felt like he was just sucking more than he should, but before he could drink it, Alex's hand stopped him.
"Don't blame yourself," he said, and when Hanna looked at Alex, he realized how stupid he was being and relinquished his hold on his drink. It earned a smile that warmed Hanna more than any alcohol ever could. It was amazing how they could exchange so much dialog with no words, because Alex had pretty much admitted that, yes, they were both horny idiots, but hey, that was okay, because he still liked Hanna and would be willing to do more. Actually, that last part was said aloud, and Hanna was glad because he might have misconstrued it in his drunken state, if it hadn't been for the promising: "I could always cash in that rain check later."
"Tonight?" Hanna asked, because even though he was drunk, he still knew that he wanted Alex to just do him.
"Hanna..." he said, and it sounded a bit hesitant. Hanna leaned closer to him and stared into the light brown eyes before him, which, upon closer inspection, reflected the lines of color from the pit so that they were hard to read beyond the fuchsia and violet and the smallest flickers of green. It was an intense, visual experience that Hanna thought too much about, because the Captain was doing Coke inside of him and making him very dizzily giddy.
"Please?" he asked, and kissed Alex lightly.
"I dunno..." Alex said.
"Please?" Hanna asked again, pressing another kiss against his lips, then his chin before moving down along his jaw. He tasted good.
"Maybe... if you're sober when we get home..." Alex said a bit weakly.
"Alex," Hanna said, and looked at him in a meaningful manner.
"You're drunk, it's not a good idea unless—" Alex's response was cut short when Hanna pressed a finger to his lips.
"You're too damned nice..." Hanna replied, drawing out the vowels slightly as he leaned forward and kissed Alex with tongue and everything, right there at the bar without giving a flying shit who saw or who cared. All Hanna knew was that he wanted Alex and Alex wanted him, so it was simple mathematics, right?
And when Alex kissed him back, Hanna knew he'd won.
"Fuck it, let's go home then," he said when they parted, and Hanna could taste the rum from his own drink on Alex's lips. It was nice and spicy with just the slightest aftertaste of sugar and mint that was just delicious and when Hanna was led away from the bar, he stopped Alex several times on their way to the door to taste him again and again. It was during one of these pit stops that they ran into Conrad, who was being held captive by a bunch of people that looked like straight up vampires in Hanna's drunken opinion. The redhead had no idea what they were talking about, but Alex was trying to convince someone of something or another while Hanna entertained himself by putting his arms around his boyfriend—that was okay, right? To assume that they were boyfriends, because they were, kind of, in a way, maybe it was something he had to ask Alex when he was not drunk off his ass—before sliding his hands up beneath his shirt and over his warm back, which was nice and muscular and, yeah, Hanna had a brief moment of clarity to understand what he was doing, but he couldn't dredge up enough self-anything to care.
Then the thumping music was gone and there was just cold air and the sound of someone's voice behind him—bitching hilariously as usual, so it had to be Connie—but Hanna was too busy trying to figure out why it felt like he was floating, and then he realized it was because he was being carried. Shit he thought, and tried to remember if he had eaten anything, but since Hanna couldn't recall, that probably was the reason for his quick intoxication, which—so wait, he was being carried? He did not know, and Conrad's voice fell away to nothing but silence and the warmth of a body against his and, well, it was nice, and Hanna was tired, so he figured that maybe it wouldn't hurt to just close his eyes for a minute.
When he came to with a little more awareness, he had the sense to know that he was in a car that was moving and there was a seat belt digging into his shoulder, but whatever. Beyond the windshield, snow sped towards his vision with the white blurs of streetlights and Def Leppard was on the radio—Two Steps Behind, the Acoustic Version, which was okay, because it was late and the song was slow, but usually Hanna would say no and get some Hysteria on any day—and when he turned his head, he saw Alex with his hands on the wheel. Hanna could see that his lips were moving along with the lyrics.
"Meh, this song..." Hanna grumbled, and Alex started slightly, apparently not having realized he was awake. When Hanna sat up a little straighter, he held his head and looked around. They were on a back street that he had never been on before and before Hanna could ask, Alex pulled into an apartment complex that Hanna had never visited. "Where're we?"
"My place. You're gonna stay here tonight," Alex explained, and pulled into a parking place.
"Shiiiit, did I pass out? Again?" Hanna asked, and upon moving a little more, found that his lightheaded giddiness was returning steadily. Rum was awesome that way, like the gift that just kept on giving.
Until it started taking, which would be tomorrow morning, and then rum was a bitch with a fucking snaggletooth.
"For a while," Alex said, and killed the engine. He yawned and unbuckled his safety belt before ruffling Hanna's hair. "C'mon and let's go in and get some sleep."
"Wait, wait, waaaait!" Hanna insisted, and struggled with his seat belt for a moment before opening the door. There was a lot of snow on the ground that was just pristine, because no one had walked in it yet and it was just fucking so perfect that Hanna had to—
"What're you doing?" Alex asked, and when he came around the side of the hatchback, Hanna was lying on his back with his arms out by his sides.
"Making a snow aaaangel," Hanna replied, stopping when Alex suddenly appeared above him. It was just him and the flakes of snow in his hair and the white that continued to descend from the sky. Alex was smiling, but he looked sleepy and a bit drunk, which was okay with Hanna, because he looked hot no matter what really.
"You're too damned cute," Alex said, and held out his hands to Hanna, "but c'mon and get up. Iz too cold out here." Hanna pouted, reaching for the outstretched palms, and when he had them, he pulled with all his might, hoping gravity might do the rest. And down a tipsy Alex fell with a surprised sound and a thump on the ground that pushed up a cloud of fresh snow. He laid there unmoving for a moment before there was just a half-chuckled: "Hannaaa."
The redhead just laughed because they were ridiculous and having fun, even though the night hadn't ended up like they wanted.
And it might have been the snow, or the way Alex rolled over and rested his head against Hanna's chest, but he kind of wanted to shout I love you at the top of his lungs, because no one had ever made him feel so good when he should have felt anything but.
However, Hanna never did, and after a few long moments, the snow just became too cold to lie in any longer. When they managed to get themselves up from the yard—after Hanna started an impromptu snowball fight, which Alex stopped immediately by picking him up and throwing him over his shoulder—and up the stairs inside the dimly lit complex, Hanna realized that this would be the first time he ever visited Alex's apartment. There wasn't much to see in his position, though and he was so drunk that he couldn't think of the names for colors or patterns anyway, so Hanna just let Alex do what he wanted with him, which consisted of helping him out of his damp clothes and into something warm and dry that smelled like cloves and sandalwood. When he wiggled his toes, he even found that a pair of cozy socks had been placed on his feet.
"Hey," Alex said, and it was only by the light of the bedside lamp that Hanna was able to see his blurry outline. Where the hell were his glasses anyway?
"Hi..." Hanna murmured sleepily, and smiled widely at him.
"Do'you want anything?" he asked, and it was slurred a bit. Hanna wished he could read the red digits on the clock on the nightstand, but then again, it didn't really matter what time it was. Fuck work and obligations and everything else in the world, because Hanna was lying in Alex's bed and he was there and they were there together, so nothing else mattered.
"You," Hanna answered, and it was without inhibitions and only pure honesty and when Alex leaned forward to turn off the light, Hanna could see he wasn't wearing a shirt and man, what a great view. Hanna couldn't stop smiling and Alex smiled too before the light went out with a click. The mattress dipped slightly as Alex crawled into bed with him and then there was just warmth and lips against his that whispered:
"Okay."
pqpq
So you know what's awesome? Writing this at work, on a Sunday, when my boss is like, right next to me. Then finishing up the final touches—at work again—on Monday, with my supervisor trying to read over my shoulder. It's super awkward and awesome and I'm going to hell lolololz.
BUT Alex's rape face = magic, all the more so because Hanna finds it as hot as I do.
Oh, yeah, do you like the place where it left off? -is shot- I'm a terribly mean person, but it's pretty awesome to be me.
Dhampir72
