Chapter 4
Ordinary Filler Chapter
Disclaimer: Jojo's Bizarre Adventure belongs to Hirohiko Araki, and Touhou Project belongs to ZUN. Credits to Ligoya for inspiration.
{Morning - The Next Day}
"Lali ho~"
I'm walking through the streets at 9 A.M. in the morning. The sun's shinin', birds' singin', and bitches are talking shit.
When I woke up, I realized that my Stand doesn't materialize when I'm asleep, and the beehive had only managed to gather a few coins before dematerializing. Its level of Independent Action could only go so far it seems. And that the pill knocked me out for like less than half a day. So I resummoned 「We Are One」 and experimented with it for a while.
Why experiment? I still want to get grips on my Stand more, you know?
"Fuh... It sure is happy today."
"Yes, it would be if it weren't for the rumors that an Outsider in black and gold are threatening the people just yesterday." Someone said. I craned my head to see who it was.
[Lv. 44 History-Eating Half Beast, Kamishirasawa Keine]
...oh. It's Keine.
*Sigh*
In hindsight, I should've known it'll come to this. She is one of the guardians of the Village, after all.
Hm. Let's compare levels for a minute.
[Lv. 44 History-Eating Half Beast, Kamishirasawa Keine]
[Lv. 18 Outsider Troublemaker, Joseph Bernstein]
I see. Wait, did my title just change...? It did. It formerly said "Pioneer Newbie". Now it says "Outsider Troublemaker." Oh well...
"Oh, and whoever you may be, miss...?" I said.
"Kamishirasawa Keine, young man. And don't you try to weasel yourself out of this. It is obvious you are the Outsider everyone talked about." Mhm.
"Bernstein Joseph. And I harbor no such thoughts, Keine-san."
She quirked an eyebrow. "Why not?"
"Because I only did that to shoo them off."
Her eyes narrowed. "By threatening them?"
"Well I could scream at them, but then I would be labeled as a dumb person." I won't say that I didn't want to tell them to fuck off, that I wanted to show off my power for a bit.
She's confused. "You know, everyone would stop ogling you if you tell them to."
"Ah, Earth- I mean the Outside World says otherwise. You have to show you are not to be trifled with to make everyone stop." Well, not really.
Keine winced. "How barbaric."
Hm. This talk is going well enough, all things considered. "Tch. Tell me about it. Society's going to the dumps." I paused to think for a bit. "Everything is going on a downward spiral. Compared to the situation out there, this place is relatively happier." Wow, I'm so glum. "I guess this settles the problem, Keine-san? Trust me, this is simply a case of culture shock in action. I truly mean no harm to the good people of this village, I didn't even vocally threaten them."
She sighed. "I guess so." I sensed a but in there. "But, if you try to-"
"Sorry for interrupting you Keine-san, but I have already understood what you meant."
...did her eye just twitch? I think it did. "Fine then."
Let's get out of here quick. "Now if you don't mind, I would continue on my path, Keine-sensei."
"What?" Shit. Fuck me and my mouth. How the hell did san become sensei? "I never told you that I was a schoolteacher. How did you know?"
Bullshit time. "I had heard about that from some gossipers."
"..." Her next thought is 'Seems legit.'
"Anyway, if you want to ask, I was just strolling about. Getting to know the place. So, good bye, Keine-sensei." I jogged away before she could respond.
~o0o~
{Kamishirasawa Keine - Third Person}
Keine is not pleased.
Just yesterday, a male Outsider (and a teenager at that) wearing a black long coat decorated with gold haphazardly had threatened the villagers with a ghost-like entity. When she asked why, everyone said that they had only talked about his strange sense of fashion. Nothing harmful, they said. When she asked where he was, only a few saw him going into an inn yesterday afternoon and hadn't come out after.
From that, Keine deduced that, one: the Outsider hated being the center of attention. Two: the Outsider is sensitive about his fashion sense. Three: it may take hours for him to cool down. Four: the Outsider is a magician, as impossible as it seems.
She was just walking around searching for that same Outsider. And then she found him also strolling around the village.
The brown haired teenager was quite tall and thin. His face wasn't good-looking nor is it revolting, simply plain average. He is dressed in a black long coat like in the rumors, though she was surprised in his choice of headwear, which looked bizarre. And she thought Marisa's pointy hat was strange enough. She found that every piece of clothing he wore was predominantly black like his coat. She also found that those same clothes radiated some sort of energy similar to magic, but for some unfathomable reason, different from it.
Keine could see that people are talking about him, and that it took him some effort to not lash out.
"Fuh... It sure is happy today." He sarcastically said.
She decided to confront him. "Yes, it would be if it weren't for the rumors that an Outsider in black and gold are threatening the people just yesterday." He turned his head and saw her. Keine could swear that, for a moment, his eyes gained a flash of recognition which was gone as immediately as it had appeared. He sighed.
"Oh, and whoever you may be, miss...?" He questioned. She suspected that the teen had already known the answer to that, but was nonetheless asking if only for the sake of courtesy.
"Keine Kamishirasawa, young man. And don't you try to weasel yourself out of this." She added that part because she could see that the boy wanted to be anywhere but here. "It is obvious you are the Outsider everyone talked about." He nodded.
"Joseph Bernstein." So that is his name. "And I harbor no such thoughts, Keine-san." That was a lie.
"Why not?" She asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Because I only did that to shoo them off."
'He is brutally honest even to a complete stranger. I wonder why.' She thought, her eyes narrowing. "By threatening them?" She said with a more hostile tone.
"Well I could scream at them, but then I would be labeled as a dumb person." 'What- how- I don't even understand, what could he mean by that?'
"You know, everyone would just stop ogling you if you tell them to."
"Ah, Earth- I mean the Outside World says otherwise." What? "You have to tell them that you are not to be trifled with to make them stop." Has the cultured and civilized in the Outside World degraded so much?
"How barbaric."
"Tch. Tell me about it. Society's going down the dumps." That vulgar tone and way of speech reminded her of Mokou, somehow. "Everything is going down a downward spiral. Compared to the situation out there, this place is relatively happier." 'Even with the supernatural gone, humanity still suffered badly? And worser than the times back then? Things must be really horrible out there.'
"I guess this settles the problem, Keine-san? Trust me, this is simply a case of culture shock in action. I truly mean no harm to the good people of this village, I didn't even vocally threaten them." That... made sense.
Keine simply sighed in resignation. "I guess so. But, if you try to-"
"Sorry for interrupting you, Keine-san, but I have already understood what you meant."
'Could you not? That would be far better.' "Fine then."
"Now if you don't mind, I would continue on my path, Keine-sensei." Wait.
"What?" How did he know? She never said that. He flinched at that. "I never told you I was a schoolteacher. How did you know?"
"I had heard about that from some gossipers."
'Seems legitimate enough. Though I think he is hiding something.'
"Anyway, if you want to ask, I was just strolling about. Getting to know the place. So, good bye, Keine-sensei." And he fled before she could form a response.
Keine sighed. "I haven't even asked him about how he learned magic..." The Outside World is devoid of magic, that she know of. That was one of the reasons Gensokyo was made, after all. It was the last place where magic could exist.
Nary five seconds later she heard a voice. "Yo! Keine-daze!" She sighed. 'Marisa.' True enough, the blond witch rode down on her broomstick. She is accompanying the current generation of Hakurei Miko, Reimu Hakurei.
"What do you want?"
Reimu, being blunt and straightforward as always, said "Where is the troublemaker?"
"Which one? Because there is one right in front of me."
"Hey!" The witch yelled in indignation.
"The Outsider." Reimu deadpanned.
"He went that way." Keine pointed towards the street where she last saw him.
"Good. Let's go, Marisa." The miko hurried up, the witch following behind. Keine sighed, and suddenly remembered something.
"...I forgot to tell them the reason why he did that..." She hesitated... and went back to her school. "Eh. He can take care of himself."
{Joseph Bernstein - First Person}
I'm hungry~
So I decided to go to a restaurant equivalent. Oh yeah. The meeting with Keine yielded some things.
[0* Meet Kamishirasawa Keine - Complete]
[Rewards: 1,000 Points.]
So, get this. I got myself a list of Daily Quests.
[0* Meet Kamishirasawa Keine - Complete]
[0* Meet Hakurei Reimu]
[0* Meet Hieda no Akyuu]
[0* Meet Kirisame Marisa]
[0* Travel for a 100 meters.]
[0* Summon your Stand once - Complete]
The rewards for each of these Quests were 1,000 AP and 1,000 IP.
There was also three Weekly Quests, one Monthly Quest, and a Yearly Quest for me right now. All those points pending for my acceptance to their challenges, though the yearly one is still locked for some reason. Probably because I'm still under-leveled.
The rewards for completing Weekly Quests are 20,000 points, while the monthly rewards are 50,000 Ability Points and Item Points. The Yearly Quest yielded a whopping 100,000 Ability Points and Item Points!
I mean, talk about a mobile game. You can come back everyday to ensure you hog all the rewards, even if you went to another world.
I also asked the System for a Weekly Quest.
[3* Search the Forest of Magic for 4 hours minimum]
[Rewards: 20,000 AP and 20,000 IP]
How bad can it possibly be? 'Accept.'
Anyway, back to the present. "What's available, sir?" I asked.
"There is a list right beside you, boy." The owner deadpanned. And indeed, there was the menu... however, I can't read shit.
"Good grief. Just get me a bowl of ramen then." I don't know this place well enough. And I never ate any other Japanese food outside of ramen and sushi. And something called chakoyaki, if memory serves. So yeah, excuse me for my lack of understanding. And my inability to read Japanese, but I will never say that. Dammit, Yukari.
The owner just stared at me blankly. "Just do it, don't ask questions, and I'll pay you extra, damn it." He shook his head and cooked a bowl of ramen.
In the meantime... 'System, can you somehow give me the ability to understand every language I know the name of?'
[Multilingual Understanding = 2,000 AP. Confirm?]
Confirm. A flood of understanding washed over my mind. Now I can read the menu and the prices. Finally.
And then the ramen was done. "Thank you very much." And I dug in. Luckily I've eaten with chopsticks before, so I didn't make an awkward scene in public.
*Ring* *Ring*
Oh? Who could that be?
"You there." A young female voice called out to me... I think. I was halfway done with this bowl. Don't distract me please. "Hey, you! The one with the strange clothes!" Yep, it was definitely me. I felt some odd sense of deja vu from that.
"Go away, please. I'm busy."
"No, you do what I say right now. I'm a busy person, and I need to complete all these other tasks of mine."
"Good grief. Just wait for a minute, can't you?" I decided to speedblitz the ramen in case that girl has any ideas. I know I could choke on it, but this is the only solution I could think of at the moment. "I'm done. What do you want?"
[Lv. 23 Ordinary Magician, Kirisame Marisa]
[Lv. 89 Hakurei Miko, Hakurei Reimu]
[0* Meet Hakurei Reimu - Complete]
[Rewards: 1,000 Points.]
[0* Meet Kirisame Marisa - Complete]
[Rewards: 1,000 Points.]
...shit. Red White and Black White is here.
"What were you thinking, threatening the villagers?" The miko straight up yelled at me.
"Wait, you are that Outsider everyone's talking about?!" The owner of this shop exclaimed.
"Shut up you!" I yelled at the shop owner. He clamped down immediately. I gazed to Reimu. She didn't flinch even if she registered my stare. "So? I wanted to be left alone."
"By threatening them?" Reimu asked, "Ridiculous."
I decided to repeat what I said to Keine. "Culture shock. And besides, I just showed off my spirit familiar. Nothing more, nothing less." I pointed at Marisa. "Just ask her." Reimu looked at Marisa as if to confirm my words, and Marisa simply nodded. After she nodded, Reimu was about to open her mouth, but realized that she couldn't fault me for being new to here.
"I'm new to this 'Gensokyo' place. I don't know it's customs. So please do excuse me if I don't follow the rules."
"Couldn't you do it without threatening people?"
"Back where I came from, you point your weapon to tell people to screw off. Not yell at them." This is a lost argument, Reimu. You knew jack about the Outside World if I remember.
"How 'bout a Spell Card Battle-ze?" Fucking hell Marisa, I won't do that.
"Spell-what Battle?" I bluffed, pretending I didn't hear it.
"Marisa, it would take time for him to acquaint himself with danmaku and the Spell Card System. I can't just duel him. It would be far too unfair. I also can't duel him here, otherwise Keine would try to punish me for it. And that'd be annoying as hell." Well that sounds about right.
"He knows magic, y'know." Hahaha, no.
"To elaborate, it's a bloodline related power of mine, I actually don't know any magic spells or anything."
"Oh... wait, so ya lied-ze!?" The witch exclaimed. Shut up, please. My ears are bleeding.
"Anyway, if you would allow me." I fished the required money to pay for the ramen. I threw away the pouch some time ago. "And some extra, exactly as I said." I gave him the extra.
"Thank you." The shopkeeper said with a partly disbelieving tone.
"Look, whoever you are, I'll clarify this; I don't want to cause trouble."
"Really?" The miko doesn't believe me.
"You could just blast my ass off to high heaven if I lie, don't you?"
"That's true-ze." Get out Marisa, you third wheel.
"Hmph. If you cause any more trouble and make me work more, I'll beat you into a pulp." A-ha, the typical fandom Reimu laziness.
'Wasn't the canon Reimu lazy AF as well?' "Yes, I understand, miss...?"
"Hakurei Reimu."
"Bernstein Joseph. And I understood what you meant, Reimu-san."
"Good. I'll take my leave, then." All three of us left the shop with Reimu being the first and me the last, though I am sure she immediately went back to her shrine.
"And I thought I could learn how to do that... they would've been useful for Spell Card battles and my experiments-ze." Poor Marisa... wait.
"You know, my father said there was an arrow that could grant these things." I lie as I showed off 「Silver Chariot」.
Her eyes conveyed her interest. "Really-ze?"
"Eh, he never told me where to find it, only that if I ever found it I should talk to him."
Marisa nodded. "Mhm."
"Well now that I can't meet him anymore, I think I'll keep that arrow to myself in case I do find it."
"Can I borrow it-ze?"
Of course... NOT. "Sorry, but I say no. He said it was 'too dangerous to be in the hands of the irresponsible' or something like that. And I don't know you enough to trust you."
Marisa slumped slightly. "Come on! Don't I look trustworthy enough to ya-ze?"
"Nope." With a hard p.
"Fine." She walked away in disappointment.
Your next line of thought is, "Why would you do this?" Well, I plan to introduce Gensokyo to the Stand Arrow sometime in the future, and I thought it wouldn't harm anybody if I told someone ahead of time. Well, two people really, Marisa and Yukari. Why Yukari? She's a freaking stalker, that's why.
I fished another bottle of coffee from 「We Are One」's trench coat, and drank it. "「Harvest」." I summoned 「Harvest」, and psychically commanded them to gather more money and rendezvous at a location of my choosing.
After that is time to go to the Forest of Magic for the weekly quest (and exploration). But first...
I just met Akyuu out here by pure chance.
Welp. That quest and the fifth one is now complete. I would like to get out of here, but she genuinely seems to want to know more about me.
"You're that troublemaking Outsider, aren't you?" Called out for being a delinquent right off the bat, go figure.
"What would you do if I say yes?" Her four guards pointed their spears at me.
"There is no need to, you four." She sighed and kneaded her forehead in exasperation. Incompetent guards much?
"But, Hieda-sama, what if this Outsider decided to attack you?"
"Those four are right. What would you do if I decided it is fit to attack you?"
"You wouldn't." I raised an eyebrow at that.
"Care to explain, Hieda-san?"
"If you did, you would get kicked out of this Village immediately. And almost everyone knows Outsiders are free game for youkai."
I chuckled, "I thought you would say something idealistically dumb, like, 'it would stain your honor' or else given your appearance. You are more mature than you look." This is true, she looked like, what, a 10-year old?
Akyuu flashed a smug smile. "I know."
"Let's just get straight to the point, you want to know more about me, don't you?" She blinked, the smile wiped off her face. "Your next line is, 'How did you know that?' To you."
Please work. Please work. Please work.
"How did you know that? ...what!?" Fuck yeah bitch! I flashed her a smugger grin than hers before.
"Now you'll say, 'Did you read my mind?'"
"Did you read my mi- Okay! How did you do that?" Her expression conveys that she is both surprised and curious.
"Facial analysis."
"...I thought it would be something more impressive." She's disappointed.
"I'm sorry, but you're just that readable." Akyuu winced at that. "Only the densest of people can't understand the curiosity written all over your face."
"Was I?"
"Indeed, Hieda-san." I paused for a bit, planning out what to say next. I applaud my skill at getting conversations off topic. I really don't want too many people to know my ability.
...I got none. So I decided to say what comes to mind right now. "Anyway, good bye, Hieda-san." Nigerundayo~
I think I could hear her saying "Outsiders are weird." Yes they are, Akyuu, yes they are.
Now, onto the rendezvous point.
~o0o~
Time to collect my rewards. I dispelled the bee hive Stand.
God there is a lot of money here. I guess you can say that this was a bountiful 「Harvest」. Eh? Eh? Wait, what's this note doing over here? I decided to read it loud enough for only me to hear.
"Congratulations, Joseph Bernstein!
Your 「Harvest」 Stand seems to be very skilled in swiping money and escaping their pursuers. I didn't know you were such a naughty boy. Your grandmother must be quite angry if she knew you did this while away from home.
Oh, and a bit of forewarning, please do not kill any more Youkai, or even other Humans at that. If you ever have to fight them, please do simply pacify them. I would be very angry if you kill again.
Signed with love, Yukari-oneesama."
Well fuck. There goes my one way to level up. And the confirmation that she is indeed peeping into my life.
[There is another way, User.]
Oh? Do tell.
[We can set this up so that you do not need to kill in order to level up.]
Does this relate to the way incidents are solved in Gensokyo?
[That is just one facet, but yes.]
Good. Do it then.
[++Opening END++]
Author's Note: Cue Roundabout by Yes.
The title of this chapter says it all. This is just a shameless filler chapter that I put to fill the gap between the entrance of Joseph into Gensokyo and the events of EoSD. Not many important things got introduced here. I did not enjoy writing this chapter much either. My current plan is to just to time skip onto Embodiment of Scarlet Devil, and underline any events worth notice during that time skip. Like what Ligoya did in Chapter 4.
This chapter also marks the end of the opening arc. The story will be divided into arcs so we can distinguish between different storylines (like SC for Stardust Crusaders, PCB for Perfect Cherry Blossom, and so on). This idea just came to me when I was in trouble finding what chapter belong to which story arc.
To those who wanted a Joseph vs Sakuya time stop fight, I do intend to do so. I'm just wondering how it could go in Joseph's favor. Here's the second thing that is bugging me when I read Sakuya's profile on touhouwiki and rereading Star Platinum's and The World's profiles on jojowikia:
Joseph = 100% Literal Time Stop
Sakuya = Accelerated Time "Time Stop"
I also have something in mind for that fight, which involves Echoes, it's second ACT, the System, and a certain meme.
Yes, I do plan on bringing the Stand Arrow into Gensokyo and turn some people into Stand Users.
The people I will DEFINITELY NOT turn into Stand Users are:
1) Yukari Yakumo: Who is already powerful in ability (Boundary Manipulation), mind (infamous as a dangerous Chessmaster) and body (being a youkai).
2) Flandre Scarlet: Just think about it. Touhou Killer Queen. A danmaku of Sheer Heart Attacks. Maybe it won't have Bites za Dusto or even be KQ, but my point is she's already OP.
3) Yuyuko Saigyouji: Bitch can insta-kill people if she wants to. Besides, my interpretation of her intelligence is that she is simply being dumb because it's easier for her, she's like Yukari in a sense.
4) Reimu Hakurei: Giving her a Stand won't do much to help her. Sure it would be cool, but what could that Stand do with "the power to float" that Reimu can't? And not to mention her laziness. The only Stand I can think of that fits her is a trumped up C-Moon or even MiH.
5) Koishi Komeiji: What's her Stand gimmick? Allow her to manipulate reality through everyone's subconscious? That's obviously bullshit.
Now, on to the reviews!
superpierce: I do plan the next Chapters after this to be them.
Ligoya: \( ゚ヮ゚)/ 2 U as well.
Metastable: The Dev. Potential of We Are One is A. It can't be infinite because (spoiler alert) I plan to have We Are One's Stand Arsenal limit somewhere in the 30s-40s, most likely lower.
EDIT: WAO is now E because it can't develop without the System.
Heaven Stands are complete no-no's. It's hax tier is way higher than King Crimson, and that Stand is the epitome of bullshit. As well any Stand that requires a Requiem in order to be beaten. I only put that there as an example.
Any sub-stands require their "mother" Stands to be summoned. Without KQ, SHA cannot be used at all. Epitaph? It requires K Crimson. And I doubt I should add that Stand.
You and me both.
And... I don't know, it kinda makes sense. I'll think about We Are One's Range stat. Though I made the Stats just for everyone to get a better picture at what it can do. It isn't to be taken completely seriously.
Kamencolin: Indeed. But Joseph would learn Hamon first, being evidently more versatile and all. And thanks for pointing out what Strength could do in your PM.
Whew. That was one long Author's Note. Man, I'm bummed.
And with everything said and done, I bid you adieu!
