Author's Note: Hello again! Not much to say here but that I hope you enjoy the chapter. Also, Blaine's friend Joey is very much intended to be played be Joey Richter. I didn't try to make them the same person exactly, just a character that I thought Joey would be perfect for. :) Please review!
Chapter Four: Wednesday
"Wakey-wakey, Pancakey!"
The smell of pancakes, maple syrup and bubbling coffee wafted under Blaine Anderson's nose. He opened his eyes to see the intruder, only to be met by a thunderous throbbing in his head.
"Okay, ow," he said, slowly sitting up. Joey laughed.
"Dude, next time I tell you not to open the bottle of scotch at one in the morning, you should listen to me. I mean really, it was a Tuesday night."
"Mhm," Blaine mumbled, rubbing his eyes with his left hand while keeping his right pressed to his temple.
"Anyways," Joey said, flicking on the light in the room, "since I am the impervious hangover God, and do not suffer like a weak mortal such as yourself, I decided to take pity on you, and have conjured up your favourite hangover cure."
Blaine looked up at his friend, who was standing above him, hair already jelled in a perfect mess and his mouth open in an impish grin. "Huh?" he managed to get out.
"Flapjacks! And black-as-a-dementor coffee. So up!" Joey shouted, purposely loud enough to cause Blaine's head to throb harder. He then pulled back Blaine's blankets in an attempt to get him up.
Blaine smiled weakly, only mildly annoyed. Joey had developed this method of dealing with hungover Blaine during their first year at NYU, when they were roommates. Blaine had previously enjoyed sleeping off hangovers, but Joey firmly believed that nothing cured a hangover like getting up and acting as if it wasn't there.
This was one of his many energetic and enthusiastic life views- if Blaine was a bubbly person, Joey was an entire bottle of soda. There was the off day where he would simply crash, and hide in his room eating chocolate and Red Vines, but hey, everyone had those days. A film student from San Francisco, Joey was something of a ladies man and had a poor reputation amongst girls, but was also a loyal friend and always reliable. He had essentially been Blaine's best friend before he left for his semester abroad, and had not only saved his ass in the fall by giving the heart-broken boy his spare room, but had promised to save it for him when he returned in April. Blaine generally considered himself lucky to have him. After all, who else was going to make him pancakes?
"I'm coming, I'm coming..." the boy said groggily, giving himself a shake. That turned out to be a bad idea, as the room didn't stop spinning for a good five minutes afterwards.
Joey rolled his eyes and left the room, singing 'Oh What A Beautiful Morning' at the top of his lungs. Blaine groaned and got out of bed, throwing on a robe and following his friend to the kitchen.
The pancakes were particularly good, with chocolate chips inside. Joey was not the greatest of cooks, but what he could make he made very well, and pancakes were his specialty.
"So Tumbleweed, what dost thou remember of last night?" he asked, putting a plate in front of Blaine and a mug of coffee in his hand. Tumbleweed was what Joey had taken to referring to the boy as when his hair was particularly unkempt.
"Um..." Blaine scrunched his face in concentration. Then he sighed as it came back to him. "Kurt." There was a note of longing in his voice.
"Uggh, tell Jenna and Jamie I'm sorry, will you?" he said, hiding his head in his hands.
Jamie was a close friend of Joey's, and Jenna was the girl Joey had been seeing on and off recently. They'd given the boys tickets to see Memphis the previous evening, and the group had gone out for dinner near times square afterward. But Blaine was now remembering that after running into Kurt at the theatre, his mood had been particularly sour for the rest of the evening.
"They understand, Blaine," Joey said, rolling his eyes. "I, on the other hand, could use an apology."
As his friend said it, memories of coming back to the apartment after dinner flooded Blaine's mind. It had been nearly eleven thirty when they'd gotten in but Blaine had insisted they have a nightcap. A few beers- followed by that bottle of scotch Joey had previously referenced. Joey's older sister, Corey, shared the apartment with her brother, and being something of a party girl, she kept it well stocked.
Blaine groaned again as he remembered the conversation that had occurred as they drank: purely Kurt. The countertenor had been the only thing Blaine would talk about. Sometimes wistfully, sometimes angrily, sometimes he had just said his name and started giggling.
"I think it's safe to say I know way, way, too much about that boy now," Joey said, and then he cleared his throat. "For instance, Mr. Hummel once had a crush on Finn, a boy who would later become his brother, not to mention the ex of my ex. He also once pretended to be a truck-loving honky tonk to please his father. He also smells like 'pink'. Thanks for that, bro."
Blaine smiled a little at each tidbit of Kurt that Joey recounted. He did feel sort of bad for having shared a lot of Kurt's most intimate details with Joey, but oh well. Joey would forget them soon enough- the film student only had so much space in his brain to store knowledge before he had to start deleting things.
"I'm sorry Jo. I promise, that was the last Kurt bender you'll ever have to put up with from me."
Joey raised his eyebrows. "I wouldn't go making promises you can't keep, Anderson. I mean, some of the things you said last night...Yeah, you're totally not over him," he summed up, grinning.
Blaine sighed, sipping his coffee and poking at the pancake that remained on his plate. "I have to be, Joey. Look, I messed Kurt up really bad. And he messed me up too. There's no way we could ever go back to trusting each other like we did before, even now that I'm back here. It's just...what's done is done." Blaine said firmly, taking a bite of pancake with whipped cream on top.
Joey made to get up. "Blaine, do me a favor. Give him a call. Ask him for dinner. It'll at least give you some closure. If you can't make it happen, you can't. But please try, otherwise I feel like we'll be ending up back in this situation, and I only have so much scotch and pancake mix. Alright?" he said, sincerely hoping his friend would give it a shot.
He hated seeing him so messed up over one boy, but truth be told, Blaine hadn't been the same since the couple had broken up at the beginning of December. Blaine sighed again.
"I'll think about it."
"'Atta boy," Joey said, clearing their plates, and hoping he wasn't wrong.
Blaine went for a walk to clear his head. Was Joey right? Was he really not over Kurt? It had been almost five months since they'd broken up- that was a long time. Blaine had even dated a little bit while he'd been in studying abroad in France, nothing serious though. And truth be told, he hadn't stopped thinking about Kurt since Saturday night.
It had upset him that Kurt had never contacted him afterwards. It had been Blaine who'd bought the drink, didn't that mean it was Kurt's job to call? He had no idea. This is so damn complicated, Blaine mused; he missed just being in a relationship. Of course, that hadn't ended so well, either. Blaine sighed as his thoughts took him back, to a cold December 5th, the previous year...
"Later!" one of the boys called out as Blaine stepped into the elevator in his apartment building, laughing to himself. It had been a fun night in with the guys- they'd gone to Jason's after school and watched ESPN classics, reveling in the re-runs. He felt sort of bad for missing dinner, but was sure Kurt would understand- it wasn't like he'd never bailed on Blaine for Rachel and Andy. Though, he hadn't actually done that since the two had moved in together in September.
Blaine still found it sort of surreal that they were living together. It had happened so fast...
Kurt didn't have the money to live in Res anymore, Rachel had left him on his ass, and Blaine had wanted to try being 'a real New Yorker' anyway...he'd just wanted to help Kurt out, plus he'd figured it would be fun, nice...so he'd asked Kurt to move in together in August, when the boy was scrambling to find a place to stay. It had made sense. But Blaine hadn't realized at the time how big a step he'd been taking...Or how seriously Kurt would take it...
He swung open the door, to find his boyfriend sitting on their two-person love seat, a somber look on his face. Blaine sobered up immediately.
"Kurt? What's up?"
The taller boy sighed.
"Blaine...we need to talk."
Blaine's heart started racing. Break up. That was the break up line. Kurt was breaking up with him? Why would he do that? But something nagged at the back of his head, telling him he knew exactly why Kurt would do that. Blaine took a deep breath. He wasn't necessarily breaking up. Calm down, Anderson, he told himself.
He sat down on the chair opposite from Kurt in their makeshift living room. The apartment was fairly bare; they'd only been living there two months, although Kurt had done his best to give it his personal flair.
"Everything okay?" Blaine asked.
"Well, no. Not really." There was a pause. "Blaine...I don't understand what's happening with us."
Blaine sighed.
"I don't really either, Kurt."
Another pause.
"Where were you tonight?"
"I went over to Jason's. He invited us over after school."
"Us?"
"You know...the gang."
Kurt sighed. This was part of the problem. Ever since Blaine had become friends with these other guys, Kurt didn't quite know how to relate to him. It didn't help that they were all older than Blaine, and didn't care much for their studies. Some of them were all right, like Joey. But Joey had been around since they'd started at NYU. It was just in the past few months that the other boys had become big parts of Blaine's life, and Kurt just didn't fit with them.
"Oh. You missed dinner."
"I'm sorry. Did you cook?"
"Spaghetti Alfredo."
"It must have been lovely." Blaine said, sincerely.
"Blaine...I don't like this."
"What?"
"I don't like waiting up for you to come home every night, cooking you food that goes cold, with no idea where you are. I feel somewhat pathetic."
"Kurt, I'm sorry I have other friends, but that doesn't mean you should feel left out."
"Well, I do."
There was a third pause.
"Well, what do you expect me to do? Stop seeing them?" Blaine said, his voice beginning to rise.
"No! I just...It's not just that Blaine. I feel like you're...pushing me away." Kurt said, looking down. Blaine looked away too. "But I keep telling myself you're not. Because why would you do that? What could I have done to make you do that?"
"Nothing!" Blaine said hurriedly. "I don't know. I'm not trying to push you away Kurt, not consciously anyway."
"Oh, but some part of you is?" Kurt's voice was now starting to rise too.
Blaine sighed again. It was all going to come out now, he supposed.
"Just lately...I feel like we're becoming different people. We're interested in different things. We have different friends. And that's okay! But some part of me feels like maybe we're also growing apart..."
"Uh-huh. Blaine, last time I checked, I'm still the same person. So I don't know what's gotten into you. Are you sure this has nothing to do with Kieran?" Kurt said, ice now working it's way into his voice. He stood up. Blaine stood up.
"Ugh, I knew you were gonna do this Kurt! Kieran and I are just friends!"
"Of course, friends who like to practice plays together until eleven at night on a school night."
"It's for our acting class!"
"And what about the Starbucks dates? Every Saturday? The ones you've been neglecting to tell me about?"
Shit, Blaine thought, he found out about the Starbucks meet ups.
"I only didn't tell you because I knew you'd be upset! I really like Kieran, but as nothing more than a friend!"
"I don't get why you're keeping secrets from me then, if he's only a friend. Blaine, I can't do this! I can't live in the same damn apartment as you and have you lie straight to my face! You've hardly spoken to me this whole week! Every night you come home and go straight to bed, and I sit here feeling like an idiot wondering what I could possibly have done in those five seconds to piss you off."
"I'm tired, alright! I'm tired all the time."
"Yeah, because you spend all your damn time with those stupid boys!"
"Those stupid boys are my friends. Kurt, you have all these expectations of me and I don't know if I can live up to them! I'm not perfect!"
"I know you're not perfect, Blaine. You never had to be. You just had to be there."
"Well I'm sorry if you felt like me asking you to move in meant that I wasn't there! News flash Kurt, people don't spend all their time in their homes!"
"Well maybe you shouldn't have asked me then!"
Blaine took a pained, slow breath.
"That's what this is about, isn't it? You don't want to live here?"
"It's just...I don't know. It's not what I expected. I'm having trouble adjusting," Kurt said, slowly.
"You're right. I shouldn't have asked you. It was stupid of me," Blaine said, a dark look coming over his face.
"So...now what?"
"I don't know, Kurt! You're the one who wanted to have this stupid conversation! You're the one 'not adjusting!'"
"Maybe...maybe I'll just go crash on Rachel's couch for a bit."
"Sounds like a good idea."
"Fine."
Kurt was crying now, and Blaine was the closest he'd ever been to it. They stared at each other for a brief moment, no doubt wondering how in the world they had ended up so unhappy; every moment together used to feel like a blessing. Now they were both pushing each other away. Kurt bit his lip, the first of the two to look away. He grabbed his tote from near the door and his jacket and left.
He came back a few days later to pick up his stuff with Rachel and Andy, averting Blaine's eyes the whole time. In their days apart, Kurt had become embarrassed for the way he acted, but also angry. Blaine had made him feel like a kid. He wasn't one, and he didn't need a boyfriend who treated him that way. He was so mad that Blaine had kept his dates with Kieran from him, even though he knew it was probably for a good reason. He couldn't think rationally. He loved Blaine, but he couldn't bear to have another fight like the one they had. So he gave up.
Blaine, on the other hand, saw things the other way around. In their time apart he realized how stupid he'd been for assuming things would stay the same when they moved in together; he should've known it was a big commitment, and he shouldn't have tried to push Kurt away upon realizing that. He loved Kurt, and he wanted to talk things through and work it out. They shouldn't live together, but that didn't mean they had to break up. But when the Divo came to pick up his stuff, he ignored all of Blaine's attempts to help, and when the shorter boy asked if they could talk, he simply shook his head and left, his arms full of boxes. That was when Blaine realized that maybe they wouldn't be able to work things through- maybe it was done.
He only cried once, that night, and then proceeded to get very drunk with Joey and the guys for the two or three weeks. He moved in with Joey, no longer able to afford his apartment. Joey lived with his sister but she was almost never around, and they had a spare room. His mid-terms were terrible, considering it was Blaine, and his parents started getting worried. When he came home at Christmas and said only two words to them, they decided something needed to be done. They suggested he study abroad for a semester in France. Blaine had always loved France, knowing a decent amount of French himself, and figured that if he went he could make a fresh start, broaden his horizons, and maybe even have a life-changing experience that would pull him out of his rut. So Blaine agreed, and that was that. He left, and didn't look back, sure that Kurt wasn't going to either.
Blaine's phone buzzed, abruptly pulling him out of his memories. How ironic, he thought upon reading the message. It was from Kieran, the boy Kurt had been jealous of, asking him to grab a coffee. Blaine sighed. Before he'd left, during his down period, he'd had a brief fling with Kieran to try and get over Kurt. It hadn't worked, of course- it had only made him more unhappy, so he'd broken it off when he left. Now, Blaine hadn't even been back a month and the drama major had already made it clear that he was still interested.
Blaine ignored the text and kept walking, without a destination in mind. Should he call Kurt? He couldn't make up his mind. They'd obviously had a good time together Saturday, and been able to put the past behind them. Of course, they'd both been very intoxicated at the time. And Kurt hadn't even said two words to him when they ran into each other at the theatre. That had pissed Blaine off. He'd tried to be friendly, and Kurt couldn't even say anything? The boy could at least try and have some manners. Blaine was, however, aware that Kurt was probably still upset with him. Which made asking him out an even worse idea! Then again, when they'd broken up in senior year, it had made getting back together that much better, and they'd both been dying to reunite.
That break up was only for a month though, and it was something petty that had caused it- a fight about solos and money and stupid things. This time they'd been apart nearly five months, and it had been because they hadn't been able to live together. This was very different. Five months was a long time. A lot had happened. And yet, Blaine still wasn't over Kurt, even after everything...
If he was being completely honest with himself, he probably would have been blissfully happy to just kiss Kurt one more time. One dinner...it wasn't a huge deal. And Joey was right: if the two weren't meant to be, it would at least give Blaine some closure. Blaine needed closure; he needed to know what had gone wrong with something that had once been so perfect- because maybe, just maybe, there was a chance he could make it right again.
Blaine nodded to himself, coming to a decision and stopping in the middle of the sidewalk. He pulled out his phone and clicked on Kurt's contact- he hadn't had the guts to delete it from his phone, another sign he wasn't over him- and hit call.
"Hello?" Kurt picked up on the second ring. It was clear by the way he answered that he didn't know Blaine was on the other end of the line, meaning he had removed his number from his phone. Blaine's heart sank a little.
"Um. Hi," he said stupidly.
"Blaine? Is that you?" Kurt said, sounding nervous and unsure. Blaine took a deep breath. Just go for it.
"Yeah, hi Kurt. Listen, I'm back in town now, as you may have figured out, and well...We'll probably be seeing each other around campus and stuff and just figured...It just doesn't make sense for us to treat each other like strangers." Blaine paused, letting Kurt answer.
"I agree," he said slowly.
"And...Well I had fun with you on Saturday. And I'm sorry I didn't say anything after or..." Blaine shook his head. He was babbling. "Look, would you like to get dinner sometime? Catch up?"
"Oh. Uh," Kurt stammered.
"Nevermind!" Blaine said quickly. "If you can't, I totally understand!"
He was about to say goodbye when Kurt's voice cut him off.
"No." Kurt said carefully. "I...That would be nice, I suppose."
Blaine smiled in spite of himself.
"How's tonight?" he said, hoping he wasn't pushing it.
"Tonight? I mean...I have company...Finn's in town and I'm sort of responsible for him...I don't know, it's sort of...You've caught me off guard," Kurt finally managed to get out.
"Right. Sorry. Really last minute. This was stupid of me. I'll let you be. Bye, Kurt," Blaine said, hanging up quickly. He sat down on the bench near by him, stomping his foot.
"Ugh!" he said to himself.
That had gone badly. That was a bad idea. Why did he do that? He should never listen to Joey. Joey knew nothing about relationships. The only real one he'd been in in the past three years had been with Rachel Berry- and that had not gone smoothly. Blaine felt embarrassed. He was normally really good at dealing with boys. Even when him and Kurt had first started going out, he was always confident, self-assured, the first one to make the move. But now, he really had no idea what to do.
Blaine sat on the bench for several minutes, reveling in his own stupidity, until his phone rang. It was Kurt.
"Hello?" Blaine said, surprised.
"Hi Blaine. I realized...Well, I don't have to take care of Finn tonight. So...I guess I'm free. Is your offer still on the table?"
Kurt sounded cautious and unsure, but at least he had called.
"Yes! Of course!" Blaine said, a little too enthusiastically. Kurt laughed at him down the phone.
"Great."
"Um, how does Fran's at seven sound?" Blaine asked. Fran's was a diner a few blocks away from his SoHo apartment. Him and Kurt had eaten there once or twice with Rachel and Andy; it made great burgers and was relatively casual. Blaine didn't want to freak Kurt out any further by making him go somewhere dressy- not that Kurt wouldn't have relished dressing up.
"See you there." Kurt said, and hung up.
Blaine laughed. Wow. What had he just gotten himself in to? He felt a little bit insane for doing it, but he also felt good. Very good.
Kurt scrolled down the computer screen, browsing fabrics he would order if he had the money to distract himself. It was no use. Instead of looking at the gorgeous materials, he would glance at the bottom right hand of the screen every five seconds to check the time. 6:18. In forty nine minutes he would be meeting Blaine at Fran's. Just forty nine more minutes.
He was already dressed, gelled and sprayed, and ready to go. He'd gotten ready prematurely to try and put off his nerves, but it had only make his stomach squirm even more. Why was he doing this? Why had he said yes? Blaine had broken his heart in the fall. Sure, ultimately it had been Kurt who'd moved out, but it was Blaine who had pushed him away, and it was Blaine who had fled the damn country. Maybe Kurt hadn't wanted to talk to him at first, but he'd come back from Christmas break thinking they would be able to discuss everything, ready to sort it out, maybe even get back together, only to find out that Blaine had no intentions of that what so ever- instead, his first love had moved to Paris, halfway across the world.
Kurt had been angry when he'd found out, there was no doubt about it. But he'd been more hurt. Wasn't Blaine going to miss him at all? He told himself that that was Blaine's final way of showing Kurt that he didn't want him around, and had spent the past semester trying to get over him, to move his life forward.
Kurt liked to pretend that it had worked. He hadn't dated anyone seriously, but had been on a few dates, looked around. Nothing made him happy though. No one had made him feel whole, like Blaine had. So he threw himself into school instead, focusing entirely on his fashion, creative writing and music theatre courses. He'd become quite the scholar. Kurt had expanded his social group as well in the past few months, becoming close with a few of the girls and guys on campus and strengthening his relationship with Rachel further. But honestly, nothing had been able to fill the gap Blaine had left behind. And he knew that. And that was why he'd agreed to go to dinner with him. But he was so damn nervous too...after all, he couldn't just forget everything that had happened. There was still a lot of pain left in Kurt.
He smiled at himself in the mirror beside his computer. Don't over think it, Kurt. Don't be melodramatic. It's just dinner. You're two adult males. You're capable of having a civilized dinner together...His smile faltered. But what were Blaine's intentions in asking him out on this dinner? Was it just to become friends again? Was it a pity dinner? Was it some sort of dare? Or did he- good God- want to get back together? Kurt tried to ignore the last possibility. He didn't want to have to think about what he would do if it were true.
6:20. Kurt got up and left his room, looking for something else to do. Rachel and Finn were sitting at the kitchen table, doing a crossword puzzle. Kurt rolled his eyes absent-mindedly. The two had been acting cutesy all day as they ventured about New York as a trio for Finn's tour. Rachel had even offered to make dinner for Finn that night, which was what had allowed Kurt to be able to see Blaine. Frankly, however, Kurt thought that they were both getting themselves into something neither of them had the time to deal with, and he almost didn't want to leave them alone together. Then again, the same could be said about him and Blaine, so there was no good in judging.
"You heading out, Kurt?" Finn asked. Kurt shook his head.
"Don't wanna be too early, I'm not due to meet him for another forty minutes."
Rachel sighed and looked up at her best friend.
"Are you sure you're okay to do this? I mean, is it the smartest thing for you?"
Kurt rolled his eyes again.
"Don't patronize me Rachel, I'll be fine. It's not like I've never been to dinner with him before," Kurt said, a lot more confidently than he felt.
"Okay, okay," she said, holding up her hands in defense. "I am simply looking out for you. I understand how crazy this all must be."
"I guess. I don't know. It is what is is." Kurt said. "You know what, I think I am gonna take off. The subway will probably be slow anyway," he said, heading for the door.
Rachel got up to give him a quick squeeze of support. She lowered her voice so Finn couldn't hear. "Have fun, but not too much fun. And whatever you do, don't let the bastard get under your skin." Kurt smiled.
"Thanks Rache," he said, and then he left, walking briskly towards the elevator.
"I'm worried about Kurt." Rachel said, sitting down at the kitchen table. She started to serve herself, taking a chicken breast and some salad. She'd cooked one of Finn's favourite meals that she remembered from when they'd dated, and had set the table with their nicest plates (which, admittedly weren't that nice).
"Mmm." Finn said, his mouth full of potato. He swallowed quickly. "I know you are. I am too, a little. But Kurt's not a kid anymore, and Blaine's a good guy. They'll...they'll be fine."
Rachel nodded.
"I just feel as though he doesn't know what to do. He's so confused that Blaine's back in his life all of the sudden...I feel like he doesn't really know what he wants." Rachel said, though now she wasn't entirely sure she was just talking about Kurt anymore. She'd spent all day with Finn and Kurt, sight seeing and completing the items on Kurt's list. It had been so comforting having Finn around...
She'd ignored Jesse's text saying Can we talk?- Kurt had forbid her from replying, even though she'd wanted to. He pointed out that after the way he'd treated her, he should do a lot more than just text her three words. But Rachel had always felt sort of weak around Jesse- like she was never as good as him, and therefore had to do everything he wanted her to do. He was the only person who ever made her doubt herself so strongly. But even she could admit that he'd been in the wrong this time. And with Finn nearby, Jesse suddenly seemed very unimportant. He was like...a trophy boyfriend. Finn had always been very much real to her.
"I think he probably does, he just isn't admitting it to himself." Finn said, shrugging and taking a bite of chicken. "Rachel, this is amazing."
The girl blushed.
"You're too kind."
The two sat in silence for a moment. Finn looked up at her.
"You know, I heard you singing in the shower this morning," he said. Rachel looked taken aback. "No...I mean...Not in a creepy way. I mean, it was really nice, hearing your voice again. I miss singing with you, I guess. I forgot how amazing you are."
She blushed more. "At singing," he added quickly.
'I suppose I'm just really fortunate that I actually get to do it at school now, too," Rachel said. "But hey, you can sing with the old group whenever you want!"
Finn shook his head slowly.
"Not really. None of us ever sing together anymore. When we graduated...I guess it sort of ended. We all moved on with our lives. I play drums for Puck's band sometimes, and I think Artie still does some acoustic stuff. Obviously Mercedes does her own thing too. But we never sing as a group. And well...without it, I kind of just stopped singing," he said, wistfully. Rachel looked aghast.
"You don't sing anymore?" Finn shook his head, sheepishly. "Oh my God, Finn! But you're so talented! What a waste!" she said, clearly horrified. "Well this just won't do."
"Rachel, what-"
"Shhh," Rachel cut him off, holding one finger over her lips. She was silent for a moment, then stood up abruptly and went into her room.
"Um, Rachel? What's going on?"
"Finn Hudson, you and I are going to do a duet. I can't believe you haven't sung in three years, this is ridiculous. We need to get you back into practice!" the brunette said as she returned from her room, speakers and iPod in hand. She sat her make shift karaoke set on the kitchen table, scrolled through her iPod and hit play.
"Rache…I don't know…" Finn said, still sitting down as the song began. Rachel walked over to him, and took his hands in hers.
"Just trust me, okay?" she said, and began to sing the male part.
"Everyone's around, no words are coming now.
And I can't find my breath, can we just say the rest with no sound.
And I know this isn't enough, I still don't measure up.
And I'm not prepared, sorry is never there when you need it."
Finn stood up, still holding her hands, and joined in for the chorus of the Marianas Trench- a Canadian band he listened to in high school- song.
"And now I do want you know I'll hold you up above everyone.
And I do want you know I think you'd be good to me,
And I'd be so good to you.
I would."
Rachel stepped back from Finn to watch as he sang the second verse, admiring her work. His voice was rusty, that was for sure, but it still had its old natural strength. The fact that it clearly hadn't been used in so long made it all the more charming.
"Thought I saw a sign, somewhere between the lines.
Maybe it's me, maybe I only see, what I want.
Or I still have your letter, just got caught between
Someone I just invented, and who I really am
and who I've become."
They took hands again and sang the rest of the song together. As the old feeling of singing with Rachel returned to Finn, he felt another old feeling creep back, one that he hadn't felt for three years.
"So." Kurt said.
"So." Blaine said. It was five after seven, and the two had just sat down inside Fran's. When Blaine had arrived, they'd hugged awkwardly and proceeded inside silently.
A waitress took their drink orders and handed them menus. Blaine looked good. He was freshly shaved and his hair was natural and curlier than Kurt had ever seen it. It suited him. Kurt's legs shook under the table from nervousness.
"What are you gonna order?" Blaine asked.
"The Chef's salad. It's reliable."
"A salad? Come on, Kurt. Let loose a little." Kurt rolled his eyes.
"Just because I'm having a salad doesn't mean there's a stick up my ass. I like to eat healthy."
"Yeah, but this place makes the best burgers I've ever had. Treat yourself." Blaine said, flashing a smile.
"Fine." Said Kurt, smiling in return. "But I'm getting a salad instead of fries. And no cheese on the burger."
"Fine." Replied Blaine. "But if you feel like being a little wild, you can steal some of my fries." Kurt laughed.
"You're incorrigible."
"I know." Blaine said lightly. He swallowed. "Well...how have you been?"
"I've been good. School is great, I'm really happy with all my theater courses. TISH just keeps getting better and better. Of course, I do wonder where I would be had I decided to pursue fashion as well…"
Blaine listened, sipping on water as Kurt described his courses in detail and how they'd progressed in the time he'd been away. They then moved on to a slightly more delicate topic- Blaine's trip to Paris. He described studying French literature and European history there.
"I'm thinking of becoming a teacher. I could teach English, French, and history at least." Blaine said. "I'd love to work with kids...And I'm thinking of taking a more active role in the LGBTQ community, as well," he said.
"How so?" Kurt asked.
"I'm not sure...Maybe I'll take a couple of courses in human rights, educate myself, join some groups. I'd like to voice my story. Let others know that they have support nearby."
Kurt smiled.
"That sounds great Blaine. I always knew you'd make a difference."
"Yeah? Well, I haven't actually done anything yet." Kurt scoffed.
"Yes you have. You helped both Dave and I feel comfortable with who we are. You were amazing for both of us. I know I wouldn't be following my dream if you hadn't showed me that I could, and Karofsky, well, he definitely wouldn't have come out at grad like that, let alone be playing for Ohio State right now." Kurt said, and was quickly embarrassed by how much he had complemented Blaine, but the boy just smiled.
"Thank you, Kurt. It's nice to know I can help."
"Of course." Kurt said, looking down.
The two talked throughout the dinner, about Rachel and her Jesse problems, about everyone back home, about Broadway, and even reminiscing a little about their Warblers and New Directions days. It was nice, for both of them. Yet neither could escape the feeling that there was a giant elephant in the room, and neither of them wanted to acknowledge it, either. After all, even though the dinner was nice, Kurt still couldn't even tell why Blaine had proposed it.
"I still can't believe you've never seen it."
Finn shrugged, smiling innocently. Rachel shook her head in disapproval, sitting down on the couch beside him, a bowl of popcorn in her hands. The two had finished dinner, their song, and dessert- frozen yogurt (it was all Kurt would allow in the freezer)- and were now planning to watch Rent, to finish off the night. The couch was small. When Finn slept on it, nearly all of his lower body was off the end, but he'd done his best not to complain too much about it. But because it was so small, him and Rachel were pressed much closer together than they regularly would have sat.
They watched the movie, Rachel singing along to every song, and Finn finishing off two whole bags of popcorn. During the course of Rent, they'd both gotten a bit sleepy, resulting in Rachel's head lying on Finn's shoulder, with his arm around her. When it ended, Finn turned his head to her.
"That was really good, thanks for showing it to me."
"I'm glad you liked it," said Rachel, smiling. "Sorry if you couldn't really hear the actors over me."
"It's cool...I love hearing you sing, anyway." Finn said, staring directly into Rachel's eyes.
He was really grateful that she'd been so good to him this week. He still felt bad about their breakup, but even worse about the fact that they hadn't talked in the almost two years that had passed since. It didn't seem right. They were Rachel and Finn- one of them was always supposed to be chasing after the other. Finn had spent the whole week trying to remind himself that they weren't in high school anymore, and that Rachel had a boyfriend. That they were different people, with different lives, and not everything could be solved by a duet together anymore. But despite everything, it had felt so good being with her again. It was easy. She knew him better than almost anyone else did, and once upon a time, she had certainly cared more than anyone else, too. The last time they'd been in New York together, it had been magical. Now, as the girl with the big brown eyes stared up at him, a smile playing on her lips, Finn didn't doubt that it could be magical again.
He leaned in, pressing his lips to hers, and he could swear he heard fireworks in the background.
Blaine took the last bite of his ice cream as Kurt laughed at a story he'd been telling about Joey and one of his failed womanizing attempts. He hadn't been able to convince Kurt to get ice cream for himself, but the countertenor had relented briefly and taken a bite of his, which was something. They'd had a lovely evening, and Blaine was sorry that it was coming to a close. He knew he couldn't ask Kurt back to his place though- that would've been fast, even for him. The waitress brought them their bills and Kurt paid his half, then stood up to put his coat on.
"Well," he said. "This has been great. Thank you, Blaine," Kurt said.
"Thank you for coming. Kurt...I want to apologize." Blaine saw fear flash in Kurt's eyes- he'd obviously been hoping to avoid this conversation. "I'm sorry for leaving. And I'm sorry for being such a shitty roommate. It was unfair of me, and you deserved better."
Kurt nodded formally. "Thank you. I'm sorry too," he said, without elaborating. He clearly didn't want to get into the details any further, which honestly disappointed Blaine a bit. He'd been hoping to clear the air. But they'd had a nice night together, and that conversation could wait for another day. Blaine got up, putting his coat on as well, and the two left the diner.
"I guess...I'll call you?" Blaine said when they got outside, unsure. How was this supposed to go? Kurt looked away.
"Um, Andy's roommate, Chelsea, is having a party tomorrow night at The Lion, that Karaoke bar we she used to drag us to. Maybe I'll see you there?" he said. Blaine smiled.
"Yeah. See you there, Kurt. Goodnight." he said, and hugged the boy one last time before they headed in opposite directions.
Author's Note: The song in this chapter is Good to You by Marianas Trench. Yes, I am Canadian...Next chapter should be up within a week, stay tuned to see what happens at Chelsea's party!
