"Bella, I have to leave."

All I could think, over and over again, was that this was a dream, and that he couldn't leave me. I stared at him, and I must've looked startled, because Jacob was being cautious.

"Bella? I can't stay here. If I go anywhere near Sam, I'm going to naturally want to fight him, and I'm not sure I could control myself. I've never had to deal with this kind of feeling before, and I'm afraid I'll get out of hand and hurt him. Bella..." He knew I wasn't going to respond, that I was shell shocked, so he just took me into his arms and held me. Finally I got over the shock and took a deep breath.

"Where will you go?" I whispered, and I was surprised at how fragile my voice sounded. So small and helpless.

"I'm not sure, Bella. I won't be far, though. I'll always be here for you, you know that, right?" I shook my head. This was ironic. I just kept losing the ones I loved, and I was starting to realize there was nothing I could do to stop it. Bad luck magnet, that was me.

"I sure do know how to clear a town, don't I?" I asked, with a sarcastic edge to my voice. He pulled away from me, and I saw the hurt on his face as he looked me in the eyes.

"No, Bella. This is not your fault-" I cut him off with a shake of my head.

"If I hadn't pulled you along so much, and just told you to leave, that I didn't love you, even if it wasn't true, then you wouldn't have gotten in a fight with Sam, and you wouldn't have to leave. Then you would still be happy. But now…" I shook my head, and buried my face in Jacob's chest.

"No, Bella. You've got it all wrong. You couldn't have gotten me to leave. I wasn't going to leave, because I was in love with you, and I still am. This is not your fault," he said, and it almost sounded like he was growling. Now I had made him mad. Maybe he would want to leave, and the separation wouldn't be as painful for him. Unless…

"Jacob. What if I told you that I can't live without you," I said, not looking him in the eyes, for fear of the pain that I knew would be etched on his face. "What if I told you that you leaving would probably kill me?" I stopped, and Jacob made a pained sound, almost like a whine. He pulled me to his chest and held me tightly.

"No, no, no, Bella. You can live without me. It's not supposed to be like this. I'm going to be the one with problems, not you. You can find someone else," he said, stopping suddenly. I tried to push him away, and I ended up ducking out of his arms. I stared at him, horrified, as he held out his arms in confusion.

"What? Bella, what's wrong?"
"Find someone else?" I asked, horrified. "Jacob, there's no one else alive that could even come close to you. You make me feel whole, almost new, like I was never broken in the first place. Even when I lay in bed at night without you, still, after all these months, it's painful. You take the pain away. Jacob, you don't understand what I'm telling you. I really, really, cannot live without you. If you leave, well, that's it. That's the end, and I'll go be with Edward." That was a lot more emotional than I usually got, and I could feel tears clouding my vision. Jacob gasped, and he looked like I had struck him across the face.

"You, you can't," he said in a strangled whisper. "Please, Bella. You can't let me be that important to you. I can't deal with thinking about you… about you not being here. How? How can I make this right, so that you'll stay here?" He looked frantic, even desperate, as he stared into my eyes, and I could see the pain I was causing him. Suddenly, I got an idea.

"Let me go with you," I said in a small voice, looking away from his piercing gaze. He started, and I could tell I surprised him.

"You would leave Forks, leave Charlie, just to be with me?" he asked, clearly surprised now. I nodded, leaning back against the tree behind me. I was suddenly very tired. I felt… old. Like all the energy had been drained out of me. He stepped toward me again, grabbing my waist and pulling me to him. I sagged into him, laying my head against his chest and wrapping my arms around his waist. He was thinking, looking off into the distance, and I let him think, staying quiet as I listened to his heart beat against my ear. He took a deep breath, holding me tighter. "Do you want to think about what you said? I mean, I'm not even sure where I'll be going, and what would you tell Charlie? I don't think he would appreciate you running off with me, even if he likes me. And don't you want to finish out high school?" As he spoke, I was shaking my head.

"Jacob, I know what I want. And I want to stay with you. I'll tell Charlie as much of the truth as I can, and I'm sure he'll understand. He knows how much you have helped me these last few months. I don't really care about high school… I mean, yeah it's important, but not as important as you. I want to go with you," I said, putting as much strength into my voice as I could. I was afraid he wouldn't want me to go, because I would slow him down. What if he thought it would be too dangerous?

"Bella, I'm warning you now. Where ever we end up, there will be danger. I will be there to protect you, but there's always going to be danger. Vampires can smell me a long ways off, and they are going to smell you too. So we'll be moving a lot. And-" I put my hand over his mouth to cut him off.

"I don't care. I want to be with you, no matter what. I can keep up, and I promise not to be a burden. I won't complain about anything, and I'll eat whatever you eat," I said. He was going to let me go, I could see it in his eyes. Suddenly, he laughed.

"Bella, you won't be a burden of any kind. And trust me, you don't want to eat what I eat," he said with a chuckle. "I'll probably just eat as a wolf. I'm sure you can keep up with me, no problem," he said with a wink.

"So you really don't mind if I come with you?" He smiled, and leaned down towards me, giving me a light kiss on the lips. I got up on my tip toes to make the kiss last longer, and I could feel him smile.

"No, Bella, I definitely don't mind. I would be honored."