Incredibly sorry that it took nearly five months to post this next chapter up. I can pull out every excuse in the book, but the truth is I didn't really want to continue this story after seeing 3x05. I practically abandoned the story but I didn't feel it was right to abandon a story so early in the plot.

I can't promise you that the updates will be regular until I finish my other stories, but I promise I won't start any multi-chaptered stories until I have Mercy all done.

This chapter was originally going to be one chapter but I had to break it up into two. I feel that this first half needed to be a chapter all on its own.

Just a word of warning, this chapter is confusing. It's supposed to be.

After five months, I present to you, chapter four.

Chapter Four

Falling, falling, falling.

Tom Branson woke up in his bed in Dublin.

Today was the day.

He looked at the pressed suit hanging from the door. It wasn't the nicest suit in Dublin, but it was his best.

He ran a hand though his unkempt hair and sighed. Was this it? Was this all life had to offer him? He craved for more, but he had to settle for what everyone told him was all he needed.

He thought of her and sighed again. He had love for her, but he wasn't sure it was the kind of love he would give his entire life to. There was no fire in their relationship. It was easy, too easy. They hadn't argued once since meeting each other. People would tell him that was a good sign, but Tom didn't see it that way.

He wanted passion. Someone to talk to, to debate with, to argue with. She was a lovely girl, but the spark between them was gone.

But he loved her and she loved him.

They would be married today.

Tom heard his mother's booming voice from the bottom landing of the stairs.

"Tommy! There's a fry up for you on the table! Get down here before it gets cold!"

Tom groaned. He rolled out of bed, eyes still heavy from sleep. He went to the door, eyes still closed, opened it and stepped though the frame.

The sound of crunching gravel hit his ears. His eyes flew open and a lush green lawn came into his view. He turned around, expecting to see his bedroom door behind him. There was a set of two very large and very heavy unfamiliar looking set of dark mahogany doors behind him. Tom panicked. He banged on the door to see if anyone was home. No answer. He ran to a window to see if there was anyone home when he spotted a man in a dark green uniform peering into the window. Maybe he could help.

"Sir? Sir?"

As Tom walked closer to the uniformed man, he could feel himself shrinking with every step that he took. As he walked closer he recognized the man staring and smiling into the window.

It was him.

Tom looked up at himself. Why was the green uniformed Tom he so much taller him? They looked to be the same age, 23, but he was a foot shorter.

The uniformed Tom didn't acknowledge the smaller Tom's presence. He kept his gaze on whatever was inside. The smaller Tom peered in and saw the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in his entire life. Her ebony tresses were in a mass at the base of her neck. Her pale skin contrasted the dark of her hair. She was wearing blue harem pants.

Daring.

She had a proud smirk on her face and Tom couldn't help but smile at her.

Tom didn't believe in love at first sight, but he was a believer now.

He turned back to his twin but he disappeared. He turned back to the window to look at the woman again, but the room was now empty. She was gone.

Tom sighed in disappointment.

"What are you looking at?"

A small voice came from beside him. He looked beside him once again, where his twin previously stood, and there was a girl with wild curly hair and expressive bright blue eyes staring up at him. She wasn't wearing any shoes and her face, hands, and expensive looking dress were smeared in dirt. She stared at him intently, waiting for an answer.

"There was a pretty lass in there."

Tom furrowed his eyebrows. There was something odd about the sound of his voice and the way he spoke, but he couldn't put a finger on it.

She laughed.

"That was probably Mary. All the boys think she's pretty. She doesn't like to go outside and play though. She says it's not lady like. Want to play with me? I'm going to the gardens to pick some flowers. Pick flowers with me!"

The girl grinned and tugged on his hand.

"It'll be fun!"

Tom sighed at the little girl's request. He didn't have time to play. He needed to get back to Dublin.

"I'm sorry little girl. I can't. I have to get married today."

A look of confusion swept though the girl's small features.

"Married? But you only look like you're Mary's age…OH! Do you mean play married? Okay then! Let's get married!"

The girl grabbed his hand in hers and held it. She swung it back and forth as she continued.

"I think we're a little to young to get married, but Mary says that she's going to be married to Patrick soon, so I don't think we're too young. Do you think we're too young darling? Can I call you darling? I hear Mama say that to Papa all the time. I think that's what married people do. Mary tells me they do other things too, like have babies, but I think we're too young to have babies. Don't you think so darling?"

Tom was about to respond the girl when he looked down at his hands. They were smaller than usual. He looked in the window and saw his reflection.

He was 12.

He reached for his head and felt the cap on top. He looked down at his small feet and saw his best Sunday shoes on. He felt the itchiness of the his wool trousers and the ill-fitting jacket that hung too loosely on his shoulders.

Tommy couldn't believe it. He was 12 again.

She tugged on he hand to follow, but Tommy couldn't move from the shock of finding out he was 12 again. She let go of his hand and hopped away.

"Fine! I'll go pick flowers by myself. See you at dinner, darling!"

Tommy needed answers and the only person he could trust here was the little girl. He followed her as she rounded the corner of the house. He ran after her so he wouldn't lose sight of her and he saw her sprinting towards a large willow tree. He saw that she plopped herself down on the bench beside it and buried her face in her hands. Tom approached her and he felt himself grow taller. His legs and arms lengthened and he felt a bit awkward.

"Jaysus. I feel like I'm 17 again.'

He finally got to her and she was wearing different clothes. The dress she had was longer and the wild curls he remembered was tamed with a clip that left half her hair tied and the other half down.

She was sobbing

He immediately sat beside her and gathered her up in his arms. She threw her arms around him. She sobbed in his chest while she cried into the lapels of the chauffer uniform he wore for his new job in Dublin.

"Oh my darling, Larry Grey is a horrible boy. Mama and Papa are trying to set me up with him, but he's terrible…He says that the only thing that women are good at doing is sitting at home, looking pretty and producing heirs. I wish women could do anything they wanted. Larry says that women can't do anything because they're beneath men. I hate him. I'll never marry him."

He looked down at her to brush away her tears when she dissolved in his arms.

Tom sat dumbfounded on the bench and took a moment to examine where he was. He looked at the lawns before him, green and lush. He looked behind him and saw the massive castle that stood before him.

It took him a minute to realize what this was and who the girl he had been talking to was.

She was one of them.

But the more he thought about it, she wasn't one of them. A girl barefooted outside on the lawns picking flowers covered in dirt. A girl crying because her views didn't match the views of her parents or her class. She wasn't your typical snooty aristocratic girl. She was different.

She was extraordinary.

Tom got up and felt himself grow a little taller and he could feel his muscles growing larger underneath his clothes. He looked down at himself and found that he was wearing his best suit. He walked around to the front of the house again and he saw her coming out of the front door. She was older now, much older. But he could tell that it was her from her walk. She walked with confidence and more importantly, a purpose. He looked at her again. Her hair was gathered at the base of her neck and she wore a simple blouse and skirt. He could tell that she had blossomed into a beautiful woman, inside and out. She gave a small but curt and polite smile to the butler. It seemed that her family finally tamed her. Once the butler closed the door, she sprinted off.

He was curious. Tom followed her again.

She ran to the garage. What's in the garage that she would want?

He saw his twin emerge out the garage in a set of tan coveralls. The girl approached his twin, handing him a newspaper. He observed as they talked and laughed. They were so comfortable with each other. He turned around to give them privacy when he blinked.

She was suddenly by his side. He was wearing his twin's clothes while she was wearing a flowing white dress with a hat to match. Tom was convinced she was the most beautiful woman in the world. Nothing could ruin this moment for him. He felt the sun's warm rays on his shoulders. They turned to each other and she had the most dreamy look on her face. They glanced down at their hands. They were clasped tightly. He could feel the softness of her hand on his though her glove. She glanced back up to her face.

It's her.

It's the girl from the window.

How could I have been so stupid?

It was her all along.

The bright colored setting started to dissolve into blues and grays. It was growing colder and he could see her standing in front of him, wearing a dark blue coat and skirt to match instead of the white he previously saw her in. She refused to look at him.

Echoes of "terribly flattered…" were coming from every direction.

When she finally did look up to meet his eyes, he felt his heart shatter into a million pieces and a bright white light filled his eyes. She was fading into the light and he began to fall.

He heard her voice…

"Tom…"

He yelled as loud as he could. "Darling! I'm here!"

The sound of her voice was even fainter this time.

"Come back to me…"

Tom tried to grab anything to hold on to, but only empty white surrounded him. "I'm trying my love, I'm trying!"

"Tom…"

Tom begged as he felt the tears coming fast. "Don't leave me, love! Don't leave me!"

He could hear her voice, but it was only a whisper now.

"…Tom…I love you…"

The tears flooded Tom's face, trying to hold on to the memory of her face, the sound of her voice, anything so he wouldn't forget. He screamed at the top of his lungs.

"I LOVE YOU SYBIL!"

He hit the ground.

Black.

All Tom saw was black.

He could feel a weight on his chest and he could hear the sobs of a woman crying nearby. He tired to remember, but she was gone. It was all a cruel illusion. He thought for a minute if he kept his eyes closed, that she would come back to him, but it was useless. He tried to remember the sound of her voice or her face, but nothing came to mind. He remembered screaming out a name but he wasn't sure what he said.

It was all lost.

The love of his life was gone and he would probably never see her again. Hell, he couldn't even remember her.

But he remembered how it felt, how wonderful it felt to be in love.

Then her remembered the pain. He blocked the pain out and futilely held on to the memory of love. It was quickly slipping away…

He felt himself exhale and all the memories of that beautiful woman in the blue pants were gone.

He opened his eyes.