Chapter four- Fife "unforgettable" days
Day 1
The next morning. Little Conan was allowed to go home and professor Agasa had offered to bring them. A lock was unlocked, the door opened and Ran entered the house, together with Conan and professor Agasa.
"And here we are, Conan- kun! This is our home. Does it ring any bells?"
He looked around uncertain and then up at Ran with sad eyes and shook his head.
"Oh sweetheart, that's ok! You'll remember soon enough!"
He looked around uncertain and unconsciously moved closer to Ran.
She showed him the house, one by one and ended the little tour in his room.
"And this is your room. You are sleeping in here with my father but he is not here this week, so you have the room for yourself." He looked around the room thoroughly.
"Look around as long as you want. I'll go and cook something nice for us, okay?"
"Yeah!" he smiled at Ran.
"Ran- san… do you think it is ok if I had a word with the kid?"
"Sure! You know where you can find me!"
"Yeah, no problem!"
Ran went to the kitchen and closed the door behind herself. Professor Agasa turned to the boy and looked at him thoroughly. Conan seemed to be a little afraid of the tall man.
"My boy, do you remember me?"
He shook his little head. Agasa looked compassionate at the boy.
"Conan- kun… how old are you?"
"I am seven years old!"he answered proudly.
Professor Agasa gulped.
"Have you ever heard the name Kudo Shinichi?"
"N-no… I dont think so but why are you asking such strange questions?"
"Oh, no, nevermind me!" he smiled at the little boy although he was crying from the insides. Conan looked strangely and puzzled at him.
"My boy, I am afraid I must leave. But I have a favour to ask you. You are now the man in the house. You try and take good care of Ran- san, ok? I mean, you like her, dont you?"
"Yes, I do! Very much!"
"Good! Can I count on you?"
"Of course!"
"Very well! See you then tomorrow, ok?"
"Yep!"
Professor Agasa soon after left the agency after having again verified himself that Ran needed nothing else at the moment. Even though the sitution was serious, he could not help a little smirk. He had to smirk as he remembered Conan's answer on his question whether he liked Ran or not and was glad that even through this whole mess, some things never change, spoken out or not.
'Shinichi- kun should try being this honest as his younger self for once with his feelings.'
---
After he had left, Conan sat on the couch and looked uncertain around, although he was not sitting still as he used to. He seemed to be almost constantly fiddling nervously. He looked really lost at Ran, unsure what to do and how to behave. She finally came out of the kitchen.
"Conan- kun?"
He stirred and turned around to look at her unsure. She sat down next to him. She knew that he was maybe feeling out of place here, unsure what to do, how to act as himself and towards the others. She was, after all, not really a relative of his.
"How are you feeling?"
She asked, looking at him with soft gaze that was supposed to melt his hesitant one.
"O- okay. I guess…" he looked around, not able to meet his gaze.
"And a little alone, too?" she interrogated him further.
He nodded, meeting her gaze very briefly. Immediately her mother- instincts were alarmed and she pulled the little boy on her lap, hugging him tightly and without really thinking about it.
"Oh sweetheart, I know how you must feel. It is really hard to get used to a new surrounding, especially when you are so young. I am sorry that all had to happen to you. I will do my best to help you, I promise!"
Slowly, he raised his arms and held her, at first hesitantely, then tightly. He clung to her and was simply glad to have such a nice person who seemed to care so much for him. He felt that he had not to be afraid or feel alone because she was here for him. In her arms he felt save. And that all although he could not remember her anymore. He could not describe it, but as long as she was with him he felt not so alone and lost. He felt rather happy and relieved and somehow just knew that she really really cared for him and that he loved her a lot, too.
Ran was rocking him slightly and stroking his little back tenderly, just like a mother would have done in her place. And he did something that she was not at all used to. He not only held her back, but also snuggled deeper in her embrace. They remained like that for a long while until she remembered the food and pulled away so that she could look at him. He looked back with big eyes and she could not help herself as she brushed a few bangs of his hair.
"I have to look after the food. You can play something if you want until I am done. Or read. You really like to read a lot."
He looked at her, his eyebrows up and tried hard to think about his time before the accident and eventually looked up again at her with lost eyes.
She smiled softly and brushed his hair again.
"Don't worry, you will remember soon, I promise!"
And even if he wanted to, he could not do anything but believe her. So he smiled and she smiled back and soon left to look what was going on in the kitchen.
Ran was stirring the food as she felt a tug on her skirt. She looked down and into two big, blue orbs that looked so innocently at her.
"What is it Conan- kun?" she asked friendly and bend down to him.
"Can I help you, Ran- neechan?"
"Oh , no thank you! But the rice will be ready in one minute!"
He looked disappointed at the boiling pot. Ran couldnt stand it. She took a spoon out of the drawer.
"You could tell me if it has got enough salt and if it tastes good, ok?"
"Yayy!" he said happily and opened his mouth, letting her feed him.
"Wow, it is really great!"
"Really?"
"Yeaaahh!"
Ran smiled at him. She was so happy that Conan did not suffer and that he was obviously happy. As long as he was all right, it was okay with her. She only had to get used to his attitude which was so different from the normal Conan attitude.
Even lunch was completely different. He sat immediately very close to her, somehow needing the contact. 'Poor honey' she thought.
"Wow, this is really sooooooo yummy!" he suddenly ejaculated, startling Ran slightly.
"I am glad you like it!"
"Does yours taste like this too?"
"Uh.. yes, I think so.."
"Let's see!" he reached over and took some of her food, eating it. He thought a few seconds about it. "Yes, this is also great! Want to try mine, too?" and before she could answer him, he had his chopsticks loaded with food and in front of her mouth. He looked with big, expecting eyes at her, so concentrated that his own mouth opened a little and his lips formed a slight 'o'.
She could do nothing else but accept his offer and he immediately smiled at her, again full of expectation of her judgement. And he was not disappointed.
"It's really good!" she smiled at him.
"Told you! Hehe.." he giggled childishly and went back to eating his food with devotion.
Ran observed him for a few long minutes. She had believed that she had a seven year old boy in her house for so long already. But it was only now that she understood, just how mature the old Conan has been. This Conan in front of her was acting way more like one would expect a boy in his age to act. And that confused her and she could not help but wonder what was the reason for this change of personality.
---
Her suspicion that he was more child- like only deepened during the day. After eating, Ayumi, Genta and Mitsuhiko came to visit Conan and to look how he was doing. Ran smiled at the children.
At first Conan was rather scared and hid behind her legs but the trio took the whole thing as some sort of game. They were actually enjoying introducing themselves to him again and then happily told him what they were usually doing at a time like this and even about some of their cases and adventures.
It was hard for Ran to figure out what Conan was thinking as he listened to them. He seemed still to be rather careful and closed up. As if he did not know how to react to the new faces who kept talking on to him happily and with excitement.
"Yeah, and you sure are crazy about soccer! I swear, you are amazing at it! You are the best among us and usually win whenever we play together!"
"Really?"
"Yeah!" Ayumi nearly screamed and then turned to Ran. "Is it okay if we go to the park and play?"
Ran looked at Conan. "I don't know. If Conan wants to, I don't see why not."
"Do you want to?" Genta stood up and looked at Conan intensely. The latter obviously got a little scared and flinched a little backwards. He looked at Ran for help.
"W-will you be there, too?"
"You want me to come, too?" she blinked at him.
He only nodded and was almost begging her with his big eyes. Ran looked at the others. They seemed to be surprised but nodded at her, obviously not minding at all.
---
Twenty minutes later, the game was already going on full speed. Conan soon found out that he really was not that bad with the ball and that he really could play decently. With growing fun he tried how far he could go, becoming slowly bolder and bolder and in the end his team won.
He squeaked and laughed happily with the others, who first looked strangely at the tone they had hardly heard from the little boy before, but soon joined him.
Conan did not know why, but when playing hide and seek, he figured that it was unbelievably easy for him to trace the others and found out where they were hiding themselves. He even got a fit of laughter as he saw Genta's huge behind peeking from behind a bush.
It felt good to him and Ran saw it with relief that he was accepted willingly among the circle of his friends. They played with him and told him a few things about himself, what they had been doing at the park usually and answered willingly all his questions. It was too soon that it was time to say goodbye and they had to go home. As the three left, Conan tugged on Ran's jacket.
"Neechan, can we stay a little longer?"
"Sure."
"Great!" he said cheerily and took her hand, tugging her over to the goal. "You are the keeper now. Just stay here and I try to get the ball through you while you try to stop it!"
She had to laugh as he explained her everything in detail, as if she had never seen a match before. He obviously did not know all the years she had cheered for Shinichi and their school- team and that he had already explained to her everything concerning soccer in detail for about one million times. At the other hand, how could he know?
Ran was glad to see him this cheery and happy as he ran around and after the ball and all in all simply looked like a normal kid. Simply like kids his age were supposed to look like when they were playing.
Again a distant voice in her mind asked her, why she had never seen him like this before the accident and if it was only her imagination that he seemed to fit better in his body like this than he had a week ago.
---
Back at home he decided to go and check out what he had in his room, to see if maybe something looked familiar to him.
Ran took the moments of silence to sit down on her desk. It had been quite exhausting, running so much with the kids and then the extra soccer- session. She was laying with her upper body on her broad desk and her gaze fell upon the picture in a frame that was always decorating it. She spend quite some time looking at it before reaching a hand out and touch the surface, trailing a finger over the contours of a well- known face. A face she almost knew better than her own.
Her thoughts drifted away to exactly that boy, young man, the face belonged to. She had to think about their dance, about the phone- call only a few days ago, his voice that had teased her but had never been mean. And the letter. Her cheeks colored.
For a moment she forgot everything around her, sinking in her own memories as a quiet voice suddenly tore her out of them.
"Who is that?"
She sat upright and turned to look at the little boy who was standing beside her. He looked at the picture, then at her and then to her surprise raised both his arms in demand. She hesitated for a moment, wondering about his behaviour before she remembered what he had gone through and that he needed her now more than ever. That was probably why he was acting like this.
Although she was not used to it and it looked a little strange to her and unused, she smiled warmly and bend to sling her arms around him and lift him up to let the little boy sit on her lap. He squirmed a little happily before coming to a rest. Then he looked at the picture again and then at her with questioning eyes.
"You want to know who that is?" he nodded. "Well, that is Kudo Shinichi. He is my childhood friend. We have known each other ever since we were little kids."
He looked at the young man again. "He looks nice."
"Yes. He actually is a very distant relative of yours and you used to admire him. He is a great detective, very intelligent. He plays soccer as well and is very good at it."
"Wow!" Conan looked at the young man, obviously trying to remember him. "Where is he?"
He looked with big, innocent eyes at her. He could not know how much the question had hurt her. She smiled bravely at him after a few moments which she took to gather herself.
"He… he is.. a- away. Solving some difficult case…" she trailed off. For some reason it felt like those few words had cost her a lot of energy.
"And when is he coming back? I would like to meet him."
Under normal circumstances Ran would probably have been crying by now. But she told herself over and over that she could not do that. She could not scare the little boy who had gone through so much these days. She could cry all she wanted later. He was more important at the moment.
"I don't know… it has been quite some while since he last… came to visit…" she looked away, could not stand looking into his penetrating eyes. Instead her gaze fell upon the picture again and no matter how hard she tried she could not hold back one lonely tear that rolled down her cheek.
She quickly brushed it away and smiled at the little boy who was looking worried at her.
"And that makes you sad, right? And you miss him, too!" he rather stated than asked.
She laughed a sad and quick laugh but nodded at him.
"Then he is not so intelligent after all. Why would he leave such a great girl alone who is missing him so much? I would never do that!"
Conan could not even blink before Ran had her arms around him and was already hugging him tightly to her chest, another tear escaping her closed eyes.
"Oh, Conan- kun!" she sobbed quietly, restraining herself with the tears as much as she could.
He did not struggle as he usually would and even held her back with his little arms as he sat still on her lap. Stroking her arm clumsily, he soon spoke up.
"Did I say something wrong?"
Ran pulled back and looked down at him, holding him now with one arm and with her free hand brushed his hair.
"No, sweetheart. You did not. You are perfectly right!"
He beamed a little proudly at her words and she could help her giggle.
"When I see him, I will tell him, okay?"
"Do that, do that." She giggled, imaging for a second a little Conan, railing Shinichi who was like twice his size and who nobody except her dared telling what to do or not, because he had left his oneechan for too long. Alone the thought was… delicious.
"You really should go to bed. It is so late already."
He looked a little indecipherably at her and it took another moment before she understood.
"Do you want me to tug you in?"
He nodded eagerly, his face brightening immediately. They stood up and Ran made Conan put his night clothes on and wash himself and brush his teeth, always ready to help him if he needed her to. She prepared herself as well in the same time. In the end, she tugged his blanket so that it was covering him properly. He looked so sweetly and innocently at her with an expression that she cannot remember having ever seen on Conan's face before. She bend and kissed his forehead.
"Now, sleep well and sweet dreams, Conan- kun."
"Sweet dreams, Ran- neechan!" he answered her quietly and closed his eyes. She switched the light off and closed the door behind her slowly.
She quickly went to her room, put her night grown on and lay in her bed. Ran could only handle so much as well. She remembered the little Conan, what he had to endure and yet he.. he had said such things about Shinichi with such a certainty… Shinichi… why wasn't he here to help her? To hold her and tell her what to do?
She started crying and buried deeper in her bed, drawing her knees to her chest. Why is he always abandoning her when she needs him most? Why was he never there? Why wasn't he here, for God's sake? Her quiet sobbing got so desperate that she never noticed the slight knock on the door. Only as it opened very slowly so that some light fell inside her room, she looked up. In an instant, she was looking at two huge orbs that were staring penetrately at her from the side of her bed.
She rose on her elbows and looked at Conan in surprise and wonder.
"R- Ran- neechan, can I sleep here with you? I am so scared alone!" he said, near tears. He was obviously very afraid to be alone what she could understand too well. After all, the house was new and foreign to him and he was all alone…
She cleaned her face with one hand and then held one corner of her blanket up. He understood and crawled quickly underneath it. Almost immediately he snuggled against Ran, getting comfortable. She wound her arms around the little boy and held him tight.
"Are you feeling better?" she asked in a quiet voice.
"Yep. Good night, Ran- neechan!" he kissed her cheek and snuggled back against her chest and in her arms.
Almost automatically, Ran bend and kissed the top of his head before she snuggled deeper into her bed, with Conan in her arms and the blanket drawn protectively around their bodies. She did not know why, nor was she in the mood to think about it and nor did it matter, but somehow, she felt better ad not so alone anymore. Felt relieved and lighter than before, as if the little boy was drawing her sorrows out of her and gave her some of his light to heal her wounds.
Like said, she did not know how or why but she was grateful for it. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath and fell in a dreamless slumber.
