"Ugh, I wish I had a transporter device." Q said in boredom.

"You're a transporter device." Mumbled Dylan.

"Your face is a transporter device."

"Your face is a transporter device."

"Your mom is a transporter device."

"Sorry, did I go too far?"

"Guys!" Allen walked in. "You know how the 2009 movie changed the reality of Star Trek?"

"Yeah…"

"Well, Data doesn't exist!"

"What?" Dylan gasped. "Data has to exist!"

"How did that happen?" Q was inclined to ask.

"Well," Allen started, "You know that transporter accident Scotty made?"

"Yeah."

"So?"

"It didn't actually kill the dog, but the dog was trapped in the transporter ray for almost 80 years. Dr. Noonien Soong found him, and decided to give up on robot building to take care of puppies!"

"No! DATA!"

"I don't care." Q said.

"We need to travel into the future and stop Nero."

"Yeah!" a random trekkie said. "Data is the best on the show!"

"And he's sooo sexeh lolololol" said a girl trekkie.

"Omigosh a girl!"

"… They started liking Star Trek because of Spock."

They all get into a time machine.

Meanwhile, in the future…

"It is I, Lieutenant Commander Lore."

"Why did we hire a psycho sociopathic android again?" Crusher asked Riker.

"Because, we thought an android would be cool."

"I wish that there was a better android…"

Dylan, Allen, Q, and the two trekkies show up on the ship.

"Aw, we traveled in too early!" Allen said.

"Way too early." Dylan said. "It feels like Season 1!" He then installed brighter lights and shot Tasha. "That's better!"

"I like that guy." Lore said.

Councilor Troi walked in. "I am feeling overwhelming emotions of… things I'd rather not say." Troi stated as she stared at all but one of the transported.

"Out of the way, Troi!" Dylan said. "I can't see anything important."

"Those computers are so cool!" Allen gushed.

"Well, at least one of the feelings isn't directed at me. Alright, cut!"

Marina Sitris started to complain. "Look, we're professionals traveling space. These outfits you're making me wear are ridiculous."

"Shut up and look pretty." Gene said.

The trekkie stared on at this.

Nero appeared on the ship. "I must destroy the one known as Q!"

"Um… No." Q said.

"Nero, you are so cool," Dylan told him, "but you need therapy."

"I'll give him therapy!" Troi volunteered.

"Best. Therapy. Ever." The trekkie said.

"Are we going anywhere with this?" Lore asked.

Data walked in. "Sir, the trekkies have found my way back into existence.

"Yes!" Allen said, then hugged Data.

"Why don't I ever get hugged?" Lore moped.

"You're mean," Allen explained, "And you kill people."

"I'll hug you!" Nero screamed.

"Computer," Allen said, "Code 14."

Nero and Lore then beamed somewhere, and the code made them explode.

"Not Nero!" Dylan explained.

The alternate timeline ceased to exist, and the 2009 movie became uncanon.

Wesley Crusher ran in. "Guys, I think –"

"Shuttup, Wesley!"

Wil Wheaton shows up. "Hey, everyone! I'd like to tell you about –"

"Shuttup, Wesley!"

"I'm not Wesley! I'm Wil Wheaton!"

"Oh."

"Okay."

"That's cool."