*I don't own Twilight, it all belongs to Stephenie.*

Edward had just settled in his hotel room, which was right in front of Jasper's, and felt his whole body tingle… The urge to knock on the other man's door and drag him to his bed was too intense to be borne.

He shook his head, repeatedly thinking the word insane. He unbuttoned his shirt and poured himself a shot of whiskey, then throwing himself into an armchair next to the phone and analyzing whether or not to make up some tattered excuse and call Jasper's room to ask him to come to his.

His hand wavered between the arm of the chair and the device in an obvious gesture of indecision, until two firm knocks startled him.

He got up, placed his glass on the sideboard and ran to open the door. His breath quickened as he realized who was standing on the other side.

Jasper looked at him suspiciously. He feared that Edward would misunderstand his going there. All he wanted was to return the folder containing L'AUBE's contract, which he had taken with his briefcase by mistake. But there was no denying that the excuse had come at the best of times.

He had spent the last few minutes struggling against the urge to be around Edward again… And now that he had him before his eyes, he was not, at all, lamenting the strong volition to check out the body he could only imagine what it currently looked like…

He had known every inch of it once, all its weaknesses, all its sensitive spots, but when he'd mapped it all out Edward was no more than a teenager becoming a man. Obviously, at that time, his body was shapely, lean with firm, defined muscles. But there was not yet that air of masculinity, that posture of experience, the bearing of a mature man Jasper had now noticed.

He tried not to but… Even restraining himself, Jasper could not help noticing that Edward was bigger, wider, his shoulders and chest more robust, exposed by the unobtrusive opening of his shirt.

The sight of him made Jasper's mouth water, and suddenly he felt like a teenager again.

"I took it by mistake..." He murmured, bewildered by his desire, which bordered on the uncontrollable, and by the piercing stare of the man in front of him.

Edward was already imagining a way to catch him off guard. He held the tip of the folder Jasper offered him slowly, holding his gaze.

Dazzled, Jasper did not let go of the contracts, just followed Edward's movement.

And of course Edward seized the opportunity…

He smiled lightly, led Jasper into the room, and then closed and locked the door shortly.

Jasper winced at the turn of the key on the latch, his heart racing audibly. He tried to remain calm, and above all, sure of his convictions. He could crave this man, as he had never wanted anyone else in the eleven long years they had spent apart... But he would not give in to the pleas of his body. He was engaged and happy, and Edward was his boss.

Edward was totally oblivious to Jasper's thoughts, and even to his own. All he knew at that moment was he had the man of his life in his hotel room, and they were abroad, far away from anyone that could impede them. He turned to the blond and assessed his stance… Jasper was standing still and looking at him with a clearly anxious gaze.

He had no doubts. He strode toward him, narrowing the distance in a few seconds, gazing into his shiny blue eyes with sweetness and letting his heart finally speak up.

"I don't know how I managed to live all these years without seeing your face..." He whispered, tracing Jasper's chin with his fingertips. "I can still smell you on me..." He spoke even more softly.

Jasper shuddered, and all his certainties went out the window.

Internally he rebuked himself for not being able to stop it from happening... But there was not much he could do, he couldn't help it… The blaze in Edward's emerald gaze made him suddenly vulnerable.

Edward leaned over and slowly moved closer, watching Jasper's reactions. And as his eyes flickered closed, subtly displaying his surrender, Edward rejoiced at the certainty that Jasper still wanted him after all.

Their lips brushed against each other, sending electric shocks through their bodies.

Then Edward's cell phone vibrated in a loud buzz on the sideboard.

They abruptly pulled away with the shock, and stared at each other in sheer affliction.

The cell phone continued its insistent buzzing until Edward, stunned, reached and answered it, while Jasper blushed embarrassed for almost having consented to the kiss.

"Uh… Hello?" He spoke suddenly dismayed. "No, I've just settled into the room."

Jasper did not know whether to stay and wait till Edward finished the call or leave. He was paralyzed by his reckless attitude.

"I know... Can I call you in 20 minutes? I'm dealing with something."

Abruptly determined to leave the room, Jasper tried to take a step toward the door but Edward, sensing his intention, held his wrist gently, begging him to wait with pleading eyes.

"Yes... As soon as it's over..." He paused uncomfortably. "Er... Me too."

The last sentence fell like a knife into Jasper's chest. He knew, the moment Edward said it, that he was talking to a lover.

The air got caught up in his throat, and he fought bravely against the tears that threatened to well up his eyes.

What the fuck am I doing here?! He screamed in his mind. What was I gonna do?!

He wrenched his wrist from Edward's hand and walked securely toward the door, his distress quickly turning to anger when he realized the key was not there.

"I need to talk to you." Edward said in a low voice as Jasper turned to stare at him. "And if I have to keep you locked in here for this, I will."

Jasper sighed, controlling his vexation.

"Mr. Cullen, please open the door." He spoke, his tone stern.

"Oh, come on, Jasper! Stop it!" Edward burst out, throwing his arms up impatiently. "Don't pretend we don't know each other or that we don't have a past! You better than anybody know how much we meant to each other." He raced through the words with eagerness and a hint of anger.

Jasper remained seemingly impassive, but on the inside he too was about to explode.

"Please... The key." He requested in a lower tone, holding out his free hand.

Edward got closer and held him by the shoulders.

"Doesn't what we lived mean anything to you?" He asked incredulously. "Or have you already forgotten everything?"

Jasper narrowed his eyes, staring at him with grief.

"Already?!" He asked rhetorically. "No, Edward. I have not forgotten anything at all. I remember every single part of it."

The last words were uttered pointedly, slowly with an intense load of bitterness, and Edward quickly understood the part he had not forgotten. Just the part he wished he did not remember, which was impossible given the severity of what had happened.

Jasper's icy attitude and the accusatory look he directed at him made Edward hesitate, filling his heart and mind with shame and regret. His hands, once firm and domineering, loosened their grip on the blond's shoulders, falling along his sides.

He didn't even know what to say. All he could do was implicitly agree with Jasper and loathe himself for being so impetuous.

Feeling his heart twist in an agony he could not even explain, Edward fished the key in his pocket and handed it to Jasper.

Jasper's eyes, following his hand movement, at last noticed the thick gold band adorning his left ring finger. He understood, with some despondency, that Edward was actually married. He looked into his eyes.

"You're married." He stated in a weak voice.

Edward felt as if his heart had frozen. He swallowed hard.

It was not like it was a secret or not at all obvious since his wedding band was not even a discreet one. He was not trying to hide it… But the way Jasper said it… The realization in his eyes… And the disapproval underlining his tone… Those truly affected Edward.

Jasper, totally shaken, left the folder on the sideboard without a word, walked to the door and turned the key on the latch, leaving without turning back.

After the door was slammed closed, Edward assumed to himself his stupidity.

It was plainly obvious Jasper did not want to discuss the past. Edward reasoned that, if it all was painful to him, who was the one that provoked all the mess that had resulted in their ending, obviously it was even worse for Jasper, who had been unjustly humiliated and hurt.

In a outburst of fury Edward took the glass he had long forgotten over the sideboard, drank the bitter liquid in one swig, and then threw it against the mirror hanging on the wall, shattering them both.

A loud sob erupted mercilessly, making him shake violently as he wept. And as he cried he assumed his exclusive guilt for the ending of the one true love he had ever had in his life.

*ONCE AGAIN*

Jasper got in his room all red and panting. He leaned against the door as soon as he closed it, his hand over his arrhythmic heart.

He had overcome that pain years ago... Hadn't he?

He searched his memories, looking for answers.

He had moved to Phoenix, where his mother lived with her new husband, just a week after the breakup. His moving there had been a surprise to the whole family, and he hid the truth from them saying he just wanted to spend some quality time with his mother before going to New York for college. None of them, not even his beloved brother Dimitri, to whom he used to tell everything, knew about his nearly eight-month disastrous involvement with Edward. His pain had been unbearable, but he promised himself not to suffer any longer for him. Convinced that the Cullen did not deserve him, he forced himself to stop crying and begun to regain the reins of his life. It had not taken that long for things to fall into place again and his routine to be stabilized.

A year later he was graduating from high school and moving to New York. There he lived with his brother as he went to Columbia.

Jasper learned to suppress his feelings for Edward and started to see other boys. But his involvement with them would only last till the third date. He went on with his life without much ado, focused on his studies and on becoming the best version of himself.

After graduation he followed to London as planned and started his specialization. He remained in England for three entire years, briefly returning to New York only once, for his brother's wedding.

On the second year of his grad course he was introduce to Emmett M. McCarthy, his mentor's senior assistant. Emmett would guide Jasper, then the junior assistant, through the drills of being a mentee and a professor's assistant, so he would become the senior the following year, when Emmett would be finalizing his course. But they became much more than simply colleagues… They connected in an unexpected way and, for the first time since his adolescence, Jasper felt he had a real chance at love once again.

Soon they were dating and completely in love. By the end of the year, when Emmett would return to the US, they already knew that, despite the distance that would exist between them, they wanted to remain together.

They did not break up. Instead, they engaged in a long-distance relationship. And for the following two years Jasper would only see his boyfriend during the US summer vacations.

Once he finished his specialization he returned straight to New York, and they decided to live together…

And all this time Jasper had thought he had it all.

He went over the last nine years in his mind, not recognizing, at any point, where he had failed to overcome that devastating infatuation. He thought he had already overpowered it.

Jasper sat on the edge of the bed, disbelieving what he was beginning to realize and accept.

In fact, he had never been true to himself. All this time he had just blocked his feelings, ignoring the desire, the passion, the deep love he felt for the Cullen. He had disciplined his mind so strictly that he had believed the lie he himself created, he had believed that Edward was past and meant nothing more to him.

The pain of admitting his weakness struck him with a violent impact that incited a low, aching crying.

Jasper felt restless as he assimilated the newly realized truth…

What do I do now...? He asked himself.

He fell asleep over an hour later, unable to decide which attitude he would take from then on

#ONCE AGAIN#

Edward entered the spacious room, anxiously looking for the place he would be sitting. He strode to the table in the left corner of the buffet, where Jasper was drinking his morning coffee, his beautiful face marred by a sorrowful expression. It was obvious that his night had been as bad as Edward's, his eyes were a little swollen, adorned with subtle dark circles.

Yet Edward felt his heart quicken... Jasper seemed even more handsome than the day before. He could not look away from the blond's bare neck, that was totally exposed by the V-shirt he was wearing.

It was with great effort that Edward was able to lower his gaze to the table when he reached it.

"Good Morning." He said hesitantly, "Can I sit with you?"

Jasper looked at him in surprise and, for just a second, Edward saw a glimmer of joy in his blue eyes. However, as he came to his senses, he assumed his formal stance once again, smiled a blank smile and nodded, indicating the chair in front of him with his left hand.

They ate their meals quietly, glancing at one another sporadically and looking away as soon as their gazes met. Edward drank half of his juice and had just a pinch of his pancake, the lump in his throat preventing him from eating properly. Jasper, on the other hand, ate more and faster than the usual, his anxiety getting the better of him.

Sensing that he had finished, Edward took a deep breath and looked directly into his eyes, wishing he could see the sincerity of his words.

"I'd like to apologize." He said slowly. "Would you allow me?"

Jasper's eyes widened in admiration and anticipation.

"I'm truly sorry for last night." Edward proceeded as Jasper did not seem inclined to interrupt. "I should have never broached that subject..."

"It's all right, Edward." He cut him off in a soft tone, not wanting to prick the wound that had been reopened the previous night. "I understand that you were influenced by the surprise, you were not expecting me to be your new employee. Believe me, I wasn't expecting you to be my boss either, but, well, we are here now, and our roles are what they are. Let's just focus on what's real and important, that's our jobs... And that's all."

He said everything in a hurry, distressed and wishing nothing more than to solve the matter as fast and definitely as possible. He had not even realized that he had let his guard down when he called Edward by his first name, which did not go unnoticed by the dark haired man.

Edward suppressed a smile of contentment, so not to alert the blond, and continued.

"I wish we could start over." He murmured, pretending to be innocent of the sentence's double meaning. "We need to have a cordial relationship, at least. This tension is not very productive. I will need you full time, and you will report to me, so...

"I understand." Jasper replied, deliberately ignoring the subtle hints and taking everything to the professional level. "And I agree. I know I'm a bit uncomfortable, but this is a matter of time, I will get used to… Be around you. After all, it was only yesterday that I started in your company."

Edward narrowed his eyes, trying to identify a glimpse of the desire he had seen the previous night in those fierce blue eyes... But before he insisted on his quest, he rebuked himself mentally, convinced that it would do no good.

I need to get over it... He thought.

But he was well aware of the power Jasper had over him. Working with him by his side, day after day, and having to ignore how much he wanted him would be an arduous task...

I need to do this. He tried to persuade himself. I need to be professional.

"I think we're understood then." He sighed in resignation.

#ONCE AGAIN#

Four hours after an exhausting prolonged meeting with L'AUBE Distributeur's board of directors, Jasper and Edward were escorted by William Cavendish, president of the UK's most respected distributor. He had invited them to lunch, when they could discuss some aspects of the contract.

Accommodated at one of the elegant tables of the Oxo Tower, Mr. Cavendish spoke to Jasper.

"You are very charismatic, Mr. Hale." He spoke with his heavy accent. "And from what I perceived at the meeting, you are also a very qualified and committed professional."

"He is. He's captivating, cunning and bold, exactly what the company needs in an account manager." Edward said, a sweet gaze over a slightly admired and definitely shy Jasper.

"How long have you been working for Masen CS?" Cavendish asked Jasper curiously.

"For two days, sir." Jasper answered in a tentative smile.

Cavendish also smiled, but in admiration, and placed a heavy hand on Edward's shoulder.

"You spoke of him as if you had known him for years. I figured he'd been working for you longer."

Jasper turned to Edward and gave him a reprehensive look, afraid he would talk too much. But Edward was shrewd.

"His competence precedes him, William." He explained in his best nonchalant tone. "Our HR director is always very careful about our hiring, and Mr. Hale was greatly recommended by his former boss. He also has a flawless resume, of course. Otherwise we would not have hired him."

After the subtle tension, that went unnoticed by the client, their focus turned back to the contract and various negotiations they would deal with throughout the week.

William accompanied them in another tiring three-hour meeting, this time with the legal council, and before the end of the day he invited them to an informal gathering at his residence.

#ONCE AGAIN#

At exactly eight o'clock, Jasper stepped out of the elevator toward the hotel lobby. His jaw dropped involuntarily as he found Edward distracted, leaning against the reception counter. He was wearing dark plain jeans pants and a button-down shirt with no tie, the neckline slightly open and the cuffs folded till his elbows. His choice of clothing combined with his hair, that for once since they met again was not slicked back, gave him a stripped-down look, though elegant. And his muscles were softly evident in the light blue fabric. He was gorgeous.

Edward smiled, trying to accommodate the distress he felt when he saw the blond in tight dark washed jeans and a long sleeve v-neck sweater over a cotton white shirt that outlined his lean but well defined torso. And the coincidence did not escape him.

"If I didn't know better I'd say you spied on me when I was getting dressed." He said in a playful tone and crooked smile.

Jasper then realized that his and Edward's choices of clothing were similar and the color shades were exactly the same.

Suddenly embarrassed, he ran his hand through his still a bit damp hair and stared at his clothes dubiously.

"Would it be more convenient for me to change?" He asked Edward in a hesitant voice.

"Do not be silly, you look... " Gorgeous, stunning he wanted to say, but he restrained himself. "Very elegant. No need to change. This color suits you very well. It matches your eyes."

Jasper restrained his smile. He did not want to encourage Edward's flirting. Though he secretly enjoyed it.

#ONCE AGAIN#

The elegant dinner at the Cavendish's house had been light and lively. Besides Mr. William's family, there were some of the distributor partners with their wives and some friends of the host who were part of the same business circle.

At one point, Jasper felt a little suffocated and went to the mansion's splendid porch with his drink.

He was lost in thought for a few minutes, recalling happy, simple, and also painful scenes from his past as Edward's voice ripped him out from the abject ramblings.

"A penny for your thoughts..." He whispered close to the blond's ear, never touching him.

In sheer surprise, Jasper turned abruptly, miscalculating the distance between them, and so spilling his drink over both their shirts.

"Oh my God, I'm sorry!" He was alarmed.

"Calm down, it's okay." Edward said smiling. "Come on, let's find a washroom."

In an unconscious gesture, he took Jasper's hand in his and pulled him.

Jasper looked startled at their hands as they walked through the room. It seemed as right as it had once, but at the same time, so very wrong...

He could feel the coolness of the gold band that adorned his left ring finger. It was a proof that he belonged to someone and was forbidden to him…

Shaking his head subtly he realized his own finger felt a bit heavier. He would also belong to someone soon enough. It was only a matter of four months before the wedding.

Oh, but the possibilities…

So enticing… So irresistible...

Such impossible and inconvenient desires…

But the idea of them were crawling their way to his mind and almost convincing him.

Jasper shook his head to dismiss the thoughts and wondered why such a simple gesture had caused him such unreasonable urges.

They stopped in front of the small white marble sink in the luxurious bathroom. Edward released Jasper's hand reluctantly, wet the tip of the hand towel and offered it to him.

Jasper, still disturbed by his inner conflict, picked it up, pulled Edward's shirt from his pants and rubbed the towel over the stain, his eyes a bit larger than usual, his breath subtly hitched due to the close contact.

Edward was caught by surprise with the gesture. He had given the towel to Jasper so he could clean his own clothes, not his, but joy took over him, satisfaction occupied space in his mind, sending reason right out the window, and he, embittered by the overflowing beauty of the man before him, let Jasper continue, his gaze locked on his face…

It did not take long for the emotions to overcome any kind of control he could have had...

Feeling unable to contain what he was feeling any longer, Edward held Jasper's hand gently, waiting for him to look at his anxious eyes. Once he did, all words lost meaning.

Jasper's gaze told him everything he needed to know. He understood promptly what those dilated pupils meant and, in a deliberately reckless gesture, he pulled the towel from his hand and put it aside. Then he took Jasper's hand firmly, and pulled him toward the main door of the house.

They took a French leave, got into the rented car in silence, and followed to the hotel.

Edward felt the need to ask if he was understanding the situation correctly, if Jasper wanted what he wanted. But he did not want to break the spell. He had realized that any word he uttered would simply ruin the moment, and that was the last thing he wanted to happen.

Jasper was feeling his heartbeats on his temples. He was a nervous wreck. It would be the first time he would consciously do something wrong. He would not even give himself the opportunity to think more about it, or he would definitely lose his courage and give up. He had to admit it to himself that he wanted it desperately, to the point of assuming whatever the consequence of that reckless act. It was worth it. At least that was what his body and heart were telling him.

As they entered the hotel, Edward caught Jasper's hand, walking briskly down the hall to the elevator.

They did not face each other. Both afraid that the other would give up that madness.

As they reached the corridor where they were staying they were confused for a second, but Edward took the lead and opened the door of his room, pushing Jasper slowly inside and closing it soon after.

For a moment they just stared at each other, making sure that the awareness of the mistake they were making was mutual.

Edward traced Jasper's lower lip with his thumb, seconds before sneaking his arms around his waist and pulling him against his body.

Presenting no resistance, Jasper entwined his fingers in Edward's silky hair, his heart mimicking the rhythm of his quickening breath.

Abruptly their lips pressed against each other in a violent kiss, filled with desire and longing...

And they both felt as if they had returned home after a long time away.