L sighed. Tomorrow they would make another move back to the states to establish a base so they could be closer to the case they were currently working on. L hated moving around all the time, but it came with the job.

It also meant tomorrow would be a long day. For him, and the recovering genius in the next room. He wondered how he would break the news to the scarred man.

And also the news about the case would be quite difficult to divulge. He had purposefully kept many aspects of this particular criminal from him. He knew that Kira would be upset about it; he wasn't ready for the ramifications this case could bring.

It had been three days since 'Kira' had returned from that awful facility. The memory of the blank expression on the once vibrant youth, upon his arrival was a memory not soon forgotten.

He sent the boys to bed early and sat alone in the room for a moment, crouched in the chair looking at the door to the other room warily.

It was a rule that all the windows in the place needed to be barred when Kira was involved, and all doors locked but it was Kira who asked to separate himself from the group. L couldn't really blame his want for solitude. He was sure Kira had little of it the past year.

He said he could feel the eyes of L's young counterparts picking him to pieces and could not work under such conditions. L new that the boys were uneasy around Kira, and he couldn't blame them for it. Even though he tried to explain the situation many times.

He stood from his position in the comfortable computer chair and let the blood rush back into his limbs. Slowly he walked to the door that led to the other room and opened it.

Gazing in he noted how Kira's hair had grown quite long, it now almost reaching his shoulders.

"Its time to change those bandages and go to bed." The detective declared in his typical monotone.

"Hnn" the other said not looking up from the screen. L flipped on the light.

"Its not healthy Kira kun to have the heat so low in here, you could catch pneumonia or at least an upper respiratory infection, and we need you at full thinking power for the coming case." L said. Kira ignored the comment.

"L, how do you expect me to do anything with out the full deck of cards? You are keeping things from me." Kira said eyes not lifting from the screen. L made his way over to the boy. His legs were splayed on either side of the key board, a position L never would have thought he would see when he first met the youth.

L wrinkled his nose as he lifted it into the air.

"You smoked again?"

"Yes." L's eyes widened as he stuck his thumb into his mouth.

"That's not like you, to put toxins into your system so willingly." At those words Kira's eyes lit up for a moment and seemed to dance in silent laughter at some private joke that L was not let in on. L suspected it had something to do with the medical facility that he had just returned from.

"Come on, let's go to bed." He offered the teen his hand. Kira sighed and put the computer on sleep, rising with L's help.

"You still haven't answered me." Silently L led Kira from the room and walked across the investigation area to their adjoining bedroom. He veered to the right and led him to L's large personal bathroom. He sat Kira on the toilet.

"Where's Watari? Shouldn't he be doing this kind of thing?" L looked into the empty eyes of his friend and nodded.

"He is preparing for our arrival in New York." As expected the captive snapped his head up. L retrieved the medical supplies from beneath the sink and extracted the gauze, tape and scissors from the kit.

"We're going to back to America? When were you going to tell me?"

"Approximately 2:30 am." Kira looked out of the room towards the clock, it was indeed 2:38 am.

Kira sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. He felt L grab his wrist and start to carefully peel back the tape from his arm.

"We will give you a sedative and transport you to the airport, I will be riding with you this time." Kira thought a long moment, wincing as the last layer of gauze was removed and with it a layer of scab.

"Well… just don't mix sedatives…they gave me Thorazine in there and I don't think its out of my system yet." There was a loud clattering and Kira flinched.

He looked over towards the detective and noticed the other had dropped/thrown down the scissors.

"They were under strict orders not to use that again. Are you sure?" Kira stared up at the heavily breathing detective, eyes wide. He nodded.

"No wonder you shredded your arms. You were going through withdrawals." Kira looked away as L returned his attention to the wounds.

"Sorry." L said nothing. He knew it wasn't Kira's fault, but ever since his defeat, the teenager had taken the worlds worries onto his shoulders. Unless…it was all an act. Which wouldn't be unlikely coming from Kira.

"That wasn't your fault." He carefully bandaged the arm and began working on the other one.

"So are you going to tell me about the case, or will it be later in New York."

"You are persistent tonight Kira Kun."

"Maybe with sleep I will handle the information you are so trepidations in giving me. What are you hiding?"

"The case we are working on has 46 murders so far. They are being efficiently kept from the media so we know there isn't a copycat. But, the way that the victims were killed…"

"There chests were tore open and several ribs cracked so that he could reach the heart. And it looks like he smashed the heart directly. But those are the only things you have given me. And then you ask me to process them? That's a tall order when at least half the pictures are missing"

"So you noticed." Kira scoffed at L's reply.

"How could I not? I only saw bodies, no weapons. No blood splatter. No forensic evidence. I've determined from the pictures that he must have used a hack saw of some kind on the ribs, but even that is negatable with out the coroner's report."

"I'm glad to see that Kira is still pretty sharp even with Thorazine in his system."

"Hnn…" Kira grumbled then looked down, clearly frustrated but not pushing it any further. Where was that spark of anger that should be in those amber eyes?

"You are right. I have left out quite a bit." Kira didn't bother to look up, he had figured as much.

"The assailant opened the chest cavity while the person was still alive and crushed the heart using his hands. There were finger indentations, the NYPD couldn't be sure at first but they have confirmed it."

"He crushed their hearts?" Kira felt uneasy.

"Yes and on the wall there were several words written in blood. The words read: Kira lives."

Kira's heart stopped, he swung his head away quickly staring at the bathtub.

"Is it wise? To have me help you with this case?"

"Why wouldn't it be? You are Kira, indeed you live. It pertains to you, and no doubt you will be invaluable for this case."

"It's probably just some psycho Kira follower."

"The probability of that is 97 percent."

"Three percent? That's what you brought me here for?"

"You seem to have mistaken your situation Kira Kun. You are in my care regardless of what case I am working on. That was the agreement. Would you rather return to Fort Monmouth? That could be arranged" Kira's shoulders slumped, and his eyes narrowed.

"No." He bit out, bitter about being threatened like a child.

"Watari and I have been lobbying for your release from the CIA. The agreement that we met was that after the three years, depending on your performance, you could continue to work with me. But it seems that the CIA has taken interest in you, and is reluctant to leave you in my hands." The other shivered. L taped up the last portion of gauze. He washed his hands in the sink then returned the freshly washed thumb to his lips.

"Kira, I would like you to tell me what goes on in there." Kira looked up at the detective, eyes wide.

"…"

"There are no bugs on you nor are there any recoding devices in this area. Please tell me. You will not get into any trouble." L watched, appalled by his friend's state of mind as his lip began to tremble. What had those monsters done to him? He had some suspicions, but they were yet to be confirmed.

He knew that anyone living under Kira's circumstances would have crumbled long ago.

He only had the medical report to go by, that was most likely doctored, and the boy himself, who came back in a near catatonic state, scars crisscrossing his body. He gave nothing away.

"They will find out…." His voice was weak and childlike. "It… It doesn't matter what happened." The tone of defiance returning as he spoke again. L new what lay unspoken. It didn't matter because Kira had lost. He was the monster now.

If he had won he would have been a god. But he didn't, he had lost.

"I need to know what is happening, if I am to get you out of there." L observed. Kira stood quickly.

"You're a fool if you think they would ever let me out of there alive." Kira strode past L and walked into his own room. It was just as sparse as the other. With only a bed and a lamp. He sat on his bed and turned away from the super sleuth. L followed him in. And sat on the floor facing the bed.

"It is true that there is much bureaucracy in play, but you are a worthy mind. I hardly think that they would just dispose of you when there are many departments of the government that could use you."

"Ahh yes, but those departments don't all know I am alive do they."

"True that the world thinks that Kira died last October with the execution of you and Missa Amane. But I hardly think that the CIA would just throw away a million dollar operation like that. I chose America, for your survival. Any other country in the world would have put you to death. But with the help of the CIA we could have you kept alive… Would you prefer death?"

"It doesn't matter what I prefer. I have crimes to atone for." He said automatically. The tone and quickness of the phrase frightened L.

"If all it took for you to admit you were wrong was losing then I should have defeated you at the very beginning." L replied looking at the ceiling. Kira recognized the body language to mean the detective was kidding. Kira smirked.

"Like you could."

"I was being facetious Kira kun."

"So was I…. L, why do you fight for me to not return to that place? Why did you fight at all?"

"I believe that you could help the world a great deal, and I believe that you should have to, for your punishment. And besides, we do not so much need the help of our friends as the confidence of their help in need"

"Epicurious. How can you be so very sure that I would help you back?"

"That is not what friend ship is about Kira. And Kira Kun seems to have forgotten that he was once one of my prime suspects, indeed the culprit I thought him to be. I know him better than anyone else, perhaps even himself."

"Hnn." L stood and walked to the door.

"I will leave you to your rest then, tomorrow will be a long day. Goodnight Kira kun."

"Night." L closed the door behind him, gently turning the lock. He rested his head against the door "I apologize Raito kun. It was the only way to save you."


When Light woke the next day, he could hear the commotion from the other room. He noticed his door was open. Taking that as a sign that it was time to get up, he swung his legs off the bed. Rummaging through the small duffle by the door, he pulled on his scrubs top and retrieved his toothbrush.

No one said anything as Kira groggily made his way to the bathroom. L watched as the door closed. It was at this time that light had cut up his arms the previous morning using shards of a broken coffee mug. But L made no move to observe the teen.

"Shouldn't we… I don't know. Tell him to keep the door open or something." Matt asked the detectives casting a glance at the closed door.

"Psh, let him off himself, we don't need him." Mello said setting L's keyboard into a milk crate for the moving van. L spun around.

"He is better capable than you at critical thinking and maybe even better than I at divergent thought process. Let him have some privacy. Yesterday his behavior was spurred on by something else" The boys were quiet a moment longer until the bathroom door opened again.

"I hardly think that I am better than you at any form of creative thinking."

"No Kira kun. You think ahead with ease. I am not the creative type. More the deductive type."

"So modest." Kira rolled his eyes and plopped down onto the sofa that sat before the fireplace. He clapped his hands together.

"So, where are my drugs?" He mocked in fake enthusiasm.

"No need for sedatives, I have just been informed that it wont be necessary."

"…"

"Well it seems the CIA has sent us an operative to assist in this case and in keeping watch over you. He has determined that no sedative is needed. But you will need to be bound."

"Oh I see. So you are going to bore me to death instead."

"You would prefer the sedative?"

"No…" the thought of being incapacitated was unnerving, but he didn't want the headache that always seemed to accompany sedatives either. Also there would be no blindfold "Its much better than that Hannibal Lector device you had me in before."

"Agreed. All right then we should be ready to go after we get the last boxes down stairs. How bout we enjoy some tea while we wait for our guest, Kira kun."

"Alright." L and Kira rounded on the small coffee table that had tea and cake set ready, while Matt, Mello, and Near took the last two boxes down stairs.

"Your useless." Said Mello to his junior who happened to be holding no boxes. Near said nothing but rolled his eyes as he began to twirl a chunk of silver bangs around his finger.

The detective waited for the door to close and lock before turning to the cake, he helped himself to the sugary treat. Serving it up with two carefully balanced silver utensils held between index and thumb. When offered a piece, Kira quickly declined.

"They wont be working with us, will they?"

"No not on this case, I don't like having them traveling to America, since Near is from that area"

"Near is the youngest?"

"Yes." The answer was clipped, leading Kira to believe that there was much more to Near's situation than L let on.

"So are you going to tell me about it." L asked not lifting his eyes from the cake.

"What?"

"About what goes on at Monmouth."

"I hardly think-"

"I thought about it and decided it wasn't entirely fair to have you divulge painful secrets if you knew nothing of my past. And since you no longer have the means to kill me in your preferred method, I find you no threat." L interrupted, dark bangs covering his eyes, to hide whatever emotion lay there.

"Your…past?" Kira knelt neatly with his hands folded into themselves on his knees. He watched as L poured the tea into two brown stoneware mugs. He didn't know what to think about learning L's past.

"Yes. I was an experiment too." L said with a stoic face as he lifted a fork full of cake to his lips.

"An experiment?"

"Yes, well as you have already guessed, I am an orphan. My parents were murdered by a madman, thus instilling my drive for justice, much like Missa… after some testing I was sent to work for the government…. From there I went to the NSA working on decoding foreign transmitions. I was 11 when the Berlin wall fell." He took another bite and chewed then swallowed, eyes gazing off to the upper right as he reflected on his past. Visual remembrance, observed Kira's brain

"There was a great shift within the NSA, I was moved around from place to place to see if there was something more suited for me. For three years I was placed in a medical facility, and experimented on." L set the plate down his hands now shaking slightly.

"In 1993 I helped the FBI with a rather large serial murder case. You may have heard of it the Joel Rifkin case?" L lifted his brow in question.

Kira's jaw dropped.

"That was you?"

"Indeed I had helped the case some. It was at that time that I met Watari. He saw what a passion I had for solving mysteries, he having come from London to help the FBI with the case. Watari is quite the detective you see." L smiled that impish smile that made you think he knew something you didn't. "Did you know that?"

"No." Kira was still in shock that the man before him helped solve that heavy a case when he was just 14.

"Yes, well Watari took me under his wing and arranged for a trade in forces between London and America. A skilled computer technician took my place, as I made my way to England. I discovered that England is far more humane with their treatment of their polymaths. I stayed in a facility with other children like me.

"It soon became obvious that my deductive skills far out shined those of my peers. I was given unlimited access to resources after I solved a particularly hard case. And I have been solving crimes ever since." Kira sat shocked at the secrets that were just uttered. A year ago, that would have been enough. Enough for 'Light' to track down L's real name and kill him. Kira shuddered.

"Your turn"

"Um…" Kira shifted uncomfortably.

"Rest assured that I would keep the information between us." L sipped his highly sweetened tea. Kira opened his mouth but closed it as he hesitated again. They sat in silence, Kira looked down at his hands.

"The usual I suppose. I'm sure you have been through worse."

"I did not tell you my past so that we could exchange woes. I do need to know how they treated you there, if I am to present a firm case as to why you should not return." There was another long pause.

"Well there were the injections…" Kira looked up nervously at the detective across from him.

"Continue."

"Basically… I mean from what I can guess, they give me experimental antipsychotics and hallucinogens. Its not as if they would tell me what they were doing. A lot of the tests are useless. Trying to determine specific sleep patterns, stupid things like hot and cold resistance… they just want to see if I differ from anyone else. I think they have a hypothesis that I some how created the death note.

"As you know Ryuk hasn't shown himself to them and after you destroyed the death note Rem disappeared, so they find the existence of shinigami dubious. Even with all of the Japanese investigation team's eye witness accounts."

"I thought they would." Kira paused and looked up at the detective. "What would you do if they tried to get you to write in a death note?" L asked out of curiosity. A startled look graced Kira's features.

"Write my own name down… I know it is the cowards way out but…" Kira tapered off, looking down. L sighed heavily. Pondering for a long minute.

"Is that why you haven't tried to kill yourself since your detention in Japan? Because it is the cowards way?" Kira shook his head.

"No… I don't know how to explain it, and maybe I'm just making excuses to myself, but, I lost, I was wrong I tried to prove a theory and when that theory proved wrong, I lost and now I will pay the price. I knew that… at the beginning what ever befell me, I fully deserved. Whether it is good or bad. I thought it was justified in making a new world order. That is also the reason why I have not chosen to forget." He paused

"Whatever happens to me is my punishment." L set his cup down rather harshly causing Kira to involuntarily flinch.

"Yes you were wrong, very wrong. But there were other forces at play. It was a dangerous thing that note in your hands but it would have been dangerous in any one's case. Maybe not to the extent as you and your former ideologies, but perhaps just as deadly. You know that now, I think. It was a mistake; however wrong it was there is always the possibility for atonement. More and more I doubt my decision to let America have you." Kira laughed nervously.

"There is no atonement for what I have done L. I knew I was killing people, I was so terribly wrong. Lethal injection would have been to good for me, I deserve all that has happened to me in this last year." Kira looked up into wide black eyes trying to see into his soul. 'Are they looking to see if my words were the truth? It doesn't matter any more. Let him think me lying. I have nothing left to prove' thought the browbeaten Kira eyes shifting away sadly.

"I do not think you are lying Kira Kun." Kira's head snapped up.

"You know it's really unnerving when you do that."

"Sorry," L smiled sheepishly. They sat in comfortable silence, each thinking about the earlier shared words, processing them. L, in order to save his friend and Kira to see if he had given anything else away. He didn't know why he felt the uncontrollable desire to hide what happened at Fort Monmouth from L. He supposed it was his last vestiges of pride clinging to him in futility.

"You said you deserved what has happened to you in the last year, what else has occurred?" Kira looked up scowling for the first time at L's persistence. He sighed heavily and met the detective's eyes, with his own weary ones.

"They took a biopsy of my brain." The fork that had just delivered its sucrose based confection to L's parted lips now clattered back on to the plate.

"What?" Kira looked around nervously at L's behavior. Something that L noticed immediately.

"They took a biopsy?" L asked almost sounding afraid.

"Its not that big of a deal."

"Kira they took a chunk of gray matter from the head of a genius and you don't think that it was a big deal."

"I am not a genius, like… like you are. I simply had to think hard when I possessed the death note." He said, trying to calm the detective down. L stood from his seat going over towards Kira he knelt down next to the teen and started carding through his hair at the top. Kira tried to pull away but the detective pulled the head he was inspecting towards him. Finally finding the scar in a very dubious place.

"The temporal lobe?" The detective asked, with almost a tremor in his voice.

"Y..Yeah I think. Can I have my head back?" The detective released his head.

"They didn't shave your head, so we wouldn't notice when Watari would check up on you." The detective stated flatly. He sat back on his haunches in typical L posture. He chewed on his index finger nail. "Kira, have you experienced any seizures since it happened" He asked staring into Kira's eyes for the truth.

"L…"

"You did then?"

"Well yes, but you should remember that I've been on a cocktail of different types of drugs for close to a year now." L bit down hard on the nail he had been chewing, a small snap could be heard as he bit through it. They stared at each other for a moment when the door burst open.

"Ryuzaki, there's a man here that wants to see you! Hyde called him a suit. What's a suit?" A little girl said pouncing on the raven-haired detective. The little girl was a blur of brown curls and a green sundress. Kira instinctually stood and walked towards his room, eager to get away from the child.

This was no place for her.

"Bonnie, didn't I tell you not to come in here? You overloaded the lock again didn't you?" Big green eyes widened to look at L, her lip began to quiver.

"But but but…"

"Its ok, just go back to your room and wait for Miss Quinn. Kira, wait." Kira froze his hand on the door handle.

"Oh my god Bonnie! What are you doing in here! I told you not to come up here, get over here this instant." A tall blond woman entered, looking to be in her mid thirties. She had her hair in a high bun and looked every bit of the grade school teacher she probably was.

The little girl ambled over to the woman slowly. Tears shimmering in her eyes.

"Please don't be too hard on her Miss Quinn, I have a feeling that someone put her up to this."

"Yes L, I'm so sorry." She smiled sheepishly

"It is alright."

The woman ushered the child out of the room, on her way she met eyes with Kira and smiled warmly at the teen, before she disappeared through the door. ' Ok then, so she doesn't know' thought Kira, he shook his head 'of course she wouldn't know. She would never tolerate a monster in a house with children around.'

Miss Quinn stuck her head back in the door.

"There is a man here who says he is from The CIA? Would you like to meet him in the parlor or should I have him sent up."

"Please send him up."

"Yes" the woman nodded and then ushered the little girl out into the hall.

"Kira kun where-" L was interrupted by voices coming from the hallway.

"Excuse me?"

"Ah sorry."

"I told you to wait in the parlor."

"My apologies…"

"L will see you now he is right this way," the door opened again to a flush faced Miss Quinn.

"I'm sorry L but the man is here already, it seems he was too impatient. He has been through the necessary check points however."

"Let him in.". Lieutenant Nix entered the room, looking as plastic as ever.

"L, I apologize but it seems a few of the children here knew I wanted to see you so they led me up here."

"No need to explain." L stood and made his way towards the agent, he shook his hand. After all they were on L's turf and the detective demanded formalities.

"Is the prisoner ready to be moved?" L's eyebrow rose. He looked over to where Kira was standing. But stopped as he saw the teen frozen to his spot eyes wide with fear staring at the door in front of him.

"Kira? What is the matter?" This seemed to shake Kira out of it. He turned to the detective and started to walk towards him. L's eyes narrowed. This was Kira's mask. L never thought that Nix would take time to introduce himself to his captive, he was the type of person who would rather stand in the shadows. But now it appeared as if Kira knew the man.

"Nothing, I am fine." As the teen stepped into the other room, Nix's jaw clenched. L noted every detail that came with their interaction.

Nix walked over to Kira, and to L's shock placed a hand on the teen's head roughing up his hair slightly. The lieutenant smiled with warmth that never reached his eyes.

"Isn't this area a bit too open for you Kira?" The Lieutenant asked. Kira nodded. L's eyes narrowed dangerously.

"L, I must say that allowing the prisoner to be out in the open, able to do as he wishes is highly unadvisable." L who had been staring at his friend as if trying to figure him out, snapped his gaze back to the agent.

"I know Kira kun quite well, after all I am the one who captured him. I know exactly what he is capable of and whether or not he wishes to escape."

"Regardless, per the agreement you made with the CIA, it states that he must be locked up at all times. Especially with children around."

"He is, this room is quite secure you have nothing to worry about, except less than intelligent people leaving the door open when it is painfully obvious it is quite a secure door with numerous locks and alarm devices attached." The agent blushed as he looked behind him and closed the door. "As for the children, Kira is no threat to them, and they may even help in his reform."

"Ah sorry." The lieutenant's eyes narrowed as they fell upon Kira as his hand still rested on his head. L's demeanor completely changed as the man apologized, he smiled goofily up at the man.

"Don't worry about it lieutenant, how could you have known. Shall we make our way to the air port?"

"Ah, yes. First there are a few precautions that we will make." The agent kept glancing at Kira, who still looked down to the side.

"He must be bound, and this… tracking devise which must be worn at all times while he is in New York." L sighed heavily.

"Yes I have read the agreement also. Alright go ahead."

The agent pulled some chain from his wool over coat and motioned towards the down cast teen. He first cuffed his hands together. Then his feet. A chain linked the cuffs on his hand and feet together, effectively incapacitating him. The agent spared a glance at L before he spoke.

"Please take a seat Kira." L's eyes narrowed as he watched Kira awkwardly move to the sofa slowly and sit, the man bent over him and L noticed how Kira froze.

The agent placed a black cumbersome collar around Kira's neck and taking pliers from his coat pocket, he firmly secured the bolts into place. Once the collar was fixed onto Kira, the agent moved the heavy protruding box to the back of his neck making the collar less noticeable.

"Alright, we are done." The agent said pocketing the pliers again.

"L?" Kira asked looking up to the detectives eye level avoiding the lieutenants still.

"Yes Kira?"

"I think I will take that sedative anyways."

8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8::8

AN: going to Florida for two weeks. I will have computer access, but this story wont be my first priority… be back soon.