Chapter 4
Disclaimer- I own nothing!
Standing on his tippy toes Tamaki checked his appearance in the bathroom mirror. Having nothing but the medicine cabinet he was willing to struggle. Happy with his reflection he grabbed the addresses to the doctors and work offices; made sure he had his keys and wallet, and left the apartment. The doctors' was a solid twenty minute walk making him really happy he left the house early. Seeing the waiting room empty worried him at first though, thinking he had the wrong address.
"Can I help you with something?"
A woman behind a desk was smiling up at him.
"I think I have an appointment, if I am at the right place."
"What's your name and I'll let you know."
"It's Tamaki Suoh ma'am."
"Yep here you are. I just need you to fill these forms out for me. If you have any questions don't hesitate to ask me."
"Ok, thank you." Taking the clipboard he laughed at all the forms, most were front and back.
It helped pass the waiting time, unless it was planned that way because soon after he turned them in he was called in.
"Hello Tamaki I'm Doctor Heckerd it's nice to meet you. Before we jump right in I want to discuss with you what is going to happen now along with future visits. I also want you to breathe and relax because you look scared out of your mind. I know now can be scary but I want you to know that I will never do anything to intentionally hurt you and if I am ever do something that bothers you I want you to speak up."
So he did look as scared as he felt, whether he was scared of what was going through or knowing he was alone it didn't matter to him, he just knew the feeling was there and quite obviously. As things got underway that fear sank deeper and deeper as it spread through him.
"Are you alright Tamaki?" Sitting up he covered him face with his hands trying to get himself to relax again. He wanted to cry, call it quits on doing this alone. It hadn't felt real until now, until he saw his child on the monitor. He had left home, said good-bye to everyone and everything he knew but until now it didn't sink in.
"You haven't told anyone have you?"
Well technically he did, just not anyone that mattered.
"Do you want to discuss your options?"
"I know my decision." Lifting his head he noticed his hands felt wet, so much for not crying.
"It's okay to get emotional. I understand that now can be very hard on some people. I want you to know about the options this office has to offer for you and that can help you with things along the pregnancy."
Leaving the doctors he felt good and lousy at the same time. Things were looking good so that made him happy. Knowing he burst out crying after explaining his complete situation to the doctor, though she was very nice, made him feel crappy. He had to straighten out, he had to go to work, his first day of work. Arriving at the office he was led the boss's office again where they talked for a moment before he was shown to his cubicle and quickly told what he had to do.
"Come to my office on Thursday so I can explain something else to you. Also payday is every Thursday and you'll get paid for the previous week, meaning your first paycheck won't be until next week, understand?"
"Yes sir."
"Alight, I need these filled out and filed by lunch and these done by four."
"Yes sir."
Sitting at his desk he looked over the first form before he filled out the required segment. This wasn't too hard so far. It was one of those jobs people quickly became bored with. Oh well at least it was a job, with no resume he got very lucky.
By ten he handed in what was needed by noon and by noon he had what was needed by four.
"Good work Tamaki, you have an hour for lunch and by then I'll have more work for you."
"Okay sir, I'll be back by one and get right to it."
This worked; he could look into night school while he ate lunch. The sooner he started it the better off he would be, getting a high school diploma wouldn't hurt at all. Since he brought leftovers from what the neighbors brought over the other day and terrified to eat too much only to throw it up he experimented while he walked to the high school nearby. He learned it was only a block from the building which worked really well since he figured most classes would start around six and he got done with work around five. He wouldn't be able to go home until after class but with the apartment being so empty he didn't miss spending time in it as much as he would have otherwise.
Getting into the school he followed the signs to the main office to enquire what he had to do from there.
"Hello there, can I help you with something? Are you a new student?"
"Hi, umm yes but no. I am a new student but I need your night class program."
"Okay, than I just need you to fill out these forms. Are you under eighteen?"
"Yes I am. Is that going to be a problem?"
"No, your fine. I'll just need a parental signature as well. Or from a guardian, whoever you live with." She had noticed his face dropped hearing about parental signatures.
"I don't live with anyone. I currently live alone. Does that mean I can't do this?"
"No of course not. You'll need these forms as well then. These are payment forms; we offer aid for those that qualify. Don't worry, most do."
"Oh okay." He took the new stack of forms he was given, just glancing over the top page he could tell he was going to have an issue filling them out.
"If you have problems or questions we have a night counselor you can talk to. She can help you fill anything out."
Well that was good to know. "About how long does the whole process usually take?"
"About a month. But, if you can get the papers filled out by Friday I can rush them and get you started in a few weeks so you don't miss more classes."
"I'll be sure to do that than. Thank you very much for all of your help."
Making sure he had all of his paperwork he went back to the office. After work he would probably go back for help on the financial end. He never got that far back home to understand it properly. The next half hour he spent filling out all he could happily surprised that it wasn't too difficult. He had copied his address and phone number down so he could give it if needed and that was one more thing he could fill out on the forms. By one he had the first stack just about done with and was ready to get back to work. He was confident that he could make this all work out for himself.
"There you go Tamaki; I'll need these done by three and these by five. Got that?"
"Yes sir, three and five. No problem." Taking the folders he was given he went back to his little cubicle to get started. He would do his best to get both done long before then, really show his boss how grateful he was for this chance and that he was as hard of a worker as he said, that his trust wasn't misplaced in him.
"Are you trying to make us look bad?"
"What?" Tamaki was stopped by someone grabbing his arm pulling him aside as he was coming back from the office. "No, of course not. I'm just doing my job."
"No one likes a suck up, shouldn't you be in school anyway. How old are you honestly, you don't look old enough to be out of high school."
"I'm sixteen and you're right I'm not old enough to be out of school. Due to events that don't concern you I had to drop out my former high school, get a job, and hopefully attend a night school so I could support myself and my future."
"What were you knocked up or something?"
"Joel that's enough! Leave the poor kid alone. What if something happened to his parents, did you ever think of that. No, probably not." A woman walked over and pulled Tamaki away from "Joel." He was grateful if not a little worried now. He didn't want trouble from anyone here and there was no way anyone knew about his situation. He just wanted to work, get money, and keep his apartment.
"Don't listen to him we are happy to have you aboard with us, Tamaki is it? I'm Donna."
"It's people like him that cause people like us to lose our jobs Donna!"
"What do you mean people like him? Yes, I'm sure honest, hardworking people like Tamaki here are frightening to all the lazy whiners like you."
She pushed him further away from Joel and closer to her cubicle so they could finish talking.
"Thank you; for all you help Donna I appreciate it. And I'm not trying to steal anyone's job I swear."
"Don't worry Tamaki no one here thinks that. Well beside Joel but no one listens to him."
Tamaki started laughing only to realize what he was doing and stop. It felt like such a long time since he laughed and not just a "I'm doing this to be polite but I'm not finding that too funny," laugh.
"Well I better get back to work but thank you again."
Sitting back at his cubicle he got back to work on the assignments trying not to worry about what Joel said. There was no way he knew he was pregnant, he wasn't showing somehow was he? No, it was much too early for that. He was just being paranoid again, that really needed to stop before he freaked himself out. Health problems were bad; he didn't want that in any way, shape, or form for him or the baby. Plus health problems could lead to no work, no work no money, and that was bad.
Finishing up before five with what he was asked to do before he was given more, this though he was calling "busy work." More paperwork but not what he had been doing all day, at least he could go home on time which was good since he hoped to stop at the school still. Attending school, whether it be night or not excited him, made him feel better about his current situation. He loved school back in Japan and really wanted to go back, graduate, get a degree.
"Mr. Suoh?"
Seeing the night time counselor waiting for him by her office door he walked over to meet her.
"Come in, sit, relax. What can I do for you today? Are you trying to apply? I don't remember seeing your name before."
"I'm trying to apply. I need some help with the financial aid forms."
"Then you've come to the right place."
Pulling out the forms to go over they managed to fill them out without a problem. He even learned the school had no issue with the fact that he was pregnant like some schools in Paris did.
"It looks like everything here is in order so you just have to finish filling out your things and get the needed documents. Where were you born? Was it here in France because if so just give me what town and I'll give you a number to call to get a copy of your birth certificate."
His eyes glistened at hearing that since that was his main concern once learning he needed proof of identification and his only id wasn't from this country. He would have proof of residence soon enough if not already so he wasn't worried about that one.
Finally home he sat on his bedding before laying out and relaxing. Today had been a long day but he had gotten a lot accomplished. Yes today had been a good day and only throwing up four times throughout the day was a giant plus. Throwing around the thought of eating or not he got up to heat up more leftovers. It wasn't really helping him learn how to cook but it saved him money until payday. Not to mention this chicken thing one of the neighbors made was delicious. Maybe this weekend he would ask them how it was made so he could give it a try. Sticking the fork in his mouth he heard a knock at the door, of course someone had to come at this exact moment.
"Oh, Julie, hello. What can I do for you?"
"Your home good. You don't have a computer do you? Or have you been on one to see the news?" Julie burst in with a laptop to show him something off it.
"No I don't, not really. Why what's up?" Walking over to his counter he looked over her shoulder. Instantly the blood left his face.
"Oh shit."
How did he not think of this? There was an article on the major news website with his picture along with information that he was missing and his father was asking for help to locate him. He was almost begging for the kidnappers to bring him home, that he was willing to do whatever to have him returned.
"Tamaki, you were kidnapped?" Turning around Julie saw him trying not to cry though it seemed to be a losing battle.
"I wasn't…I didn't…I couldn't…please don't tell anyone that that's me. No one can find me. I ran away from home so they wouldn't find out." Unable to hold the tears and fear he burst out crying hunched over the other cabinet. Feeling Julie wrap her arms around him to hug him he moved to cry on her.
"It's alright Tamaki, I won't tell anyone here or there I promise. I'm sure you had your reasons for doing what you're doing. I didn't want to upset you by showing this to you." She really didn't, she came across it when she went on the website like she did every day. Noticing it looked a lot like him she ran over to figure out if it was or not. She got her answer all right.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
Tamaki sat on the floor in the living room with Julie across listening to his tale. She hadn't said anything since he started; she just listened and let him cry. It had to be so hard on him, to do what he did at his age; she didn't think she could have done it. He was so strong and clearly loved this Kyouya to give up everything for him since it didn't sound like an abusive relationship. He was trying to protect him at his own expense; that took guts.
"I'm sorry you had to watch that. You didn't have to stay." Drying his eyes with his sleeve he tried to stop crying while Julie moved closer and rubbed his back while hugging him again.
"Don't apologize I am happy I stayed. You're a good kid Tamaki."
He just stared at her for a moment, thinking about it a lot of people said that to him. But what he didn't understand was how, how was he a good anything after what he did.
"Sure you've done things you may not be completely proud with but your human and mistakes happen. But you're doing your very best to make the most of everything."
"I'm stupid and nothing more. I was stupid by not being careful, I was stupid by getting pregnant, I was stupid for running away from home."
"But look where you are now. You're in an apartment, with a job, with a plan for the future. Most in your situation don't have anything."
Looking around at his empty place he didn't feel so accomplished or better off. Right now he was barely making it, it felt like.
"Give it time Tamaki; I'm sure once you spruce the place up you'll feel better. I even know a few places you can get some super cute things for cheap. And I don't mean cute in the girly all frilly sense."
"Maybe you're right. Maybe I could go check it out next weekend."
"See that's the spirit."
Jumping up she remembered he had been eating when she came over.
"I should go so you can finish your dinner. How is it by the way? Do you like it?"
Getting up as well he noticed his plate on the counter next to Julie's laptop where he left it to see what she wanted to show him.
"It's really good. You made it? I was trying to remember so I could ask if you could teach me how to make it."
"You want me to teach you how to make chicken marsala? Sure I can do that, it's my absolute favorite food."
Pausing he started to have a mini freak out, marsala, as in the wine, shit.
"Are you alright, you're not looking too hot."
"I messed up, I messed up big time. See I told you I was stupid."
"Tamaki I'm not following you. You're not stupid, you haven't done anything wrong. Why are you freaking out?" Trying to put the pieces together she was able to put two and two together.
"Oh is that it? Don't worry its fine trust me."
"No it's not and if I hurt the child I'll never forgive myself."
"Tamaki listen to me its fine. I work as a nurse and I promise you its okay. For one I use cooking wines which are lower in alcohol volume and secondly I have proof that it won't do anything. My mother ate it all the time when she was pregnant with me and my siblings and we turned out just fine."
"Are you sure?"
"I am so please calm down. If you're still not sure I can show you other things you can add to substitute with the wines."
Looking at her to make sure she wasn't lying he tried to relax again.
"So finishing it won't do anything?"
"Not a thing, well it will stop you from being hungry."
That night he laid in bed and just tossed and turned. He felt like he couldn't get comfortable or get his mind to stop. He was worried about that story being all over the country and someone turning him in. This must be what criminals felt like when they were hiding from the cops. Sitting up he started to feel nauseous, dinner, plus nerves, plus morning sickness equaled not the best combo in the world. Running to the bathroom he decided he probably wasn't leaving anytime soon and once able he moved to the little section between the sink and the toilet. Grabbing his knees he hugged them close while he tried not to cry anymore. He cried enough today. Still, he was terrified for tomorrow. He was scared to go to work if people saw that report; he didn't want them to know he ran away.
"Should I just go home? Maybe I should call my father and let him know I'm okay? What if I called Kyouya? No what am I thinking. I can't call either of them. I can't go back there."
Trying to fall asleep for the night he did his best to block out the thoughts.
Hearing a beeping in the distance Tamaki opened his eyes to see that he was still in his spot from last night. Stretching his legs out he tried to stand so he could turn it off. He had to push past his fears and keep moving. He would be fine, no one knew the truth, no one saw the report. If it was just online and only on the one website then it was just by chance that Julie found it. Knowing his father though, that message was all over the world in search for him. No he couldn't think like that, it wouldn't do any good. Skipping breakfast he showered and got dressed to head to the office. It was only his second day so he couldn't not go in
He was grateful his cubicle was so close to the bathroom as he was there every ten minutes. Maybe he should have called in sick. Stepping out of the stall again he saw Joel and their boss near the sinks watching him, just fantastic.
"Are you alright Tamaki?"
"Umm, yes, just fine thanks. I think I have food poisoning from what I ate last night."
"If you want, the convenient store next door should have something you can take. They are known to carry every sort of remedy."
"Thank you sir I will go see if it's not a problem. And then I should have those papers for you." Heading towards the front of the building to leave and "go see" he decided to go buy gum, this feeling in his mouth was gross.
"So how far along are you?" Freezing he heard Joel right behind him, turning around to face him he made sure no one over heard him. Their boss knew, he told him during the interview but he wanted to keep it a secret.
"How far along am I in what?"
"You say that now. But I know I'm right and will be proven so soon enough. I'm on to you Tamaki. You're no different than anyone else. You are nothing but a whore that sleeps around, gets pregnant and then tries to act all grown up because you're going to have a baby. Why else would you suddenly need a job and during school hours. Let me guess parents kicked you out and the father was a two bit loser that wasn't up to dealing with a brat. The boss may have fallen for your woe is me story but I could care less. I want you to stay out of my way. I don't give pity to idiots who got themselves into their own positions."
"And I never asked for it." Before he had to throw up again he walked away to leave the building. He needed fresh air and to get away from Joel. He had never been so infuriated with anyone before. He had no idea what he was talking about, and how dare he say what he did. He was no whore, he would never sleep with anyone he wasn't absolutely in love with, and Kyouya wasn't some trailer trash. What was his problem anyway, he hadn't done anything to him to bring up his attitude. He didn't want to deal with him once he did start showing. Hopefully he wouldn't try to hurt him; he didn't want to have to worry about his co-workers going after him or his baby. At least so far no one brought up the news story; that was a plus. As he walked into the store with his blood pressure souring gum sounded amazing. After the morning he was having he could chew the stress away.
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Woot chapter 4 is up finally! This story is my main story now so hopefully updates will be sooner. That is if my classes allow the time to work on it. Please review for they make me warm and fuzzy on the inside. :)
~Femalefighter~
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