Blue Jell-O : Chapter 4

Ok, guys, this is it ! You asked for it... though this may not be exactly what you expected ! I enjoyed myself a lot...at your expense... Have fun !

Don't worry, more is coming;)

This chapter was written to please LadyMo and Loufiction who had requested an end to this story, though I'd first meant to leave it with an open ending. Special thanks to LadyMo for all her suggestions and constructive criticism;)

It'd been several days now since he'd last seen her. He'd left but until the last moment he'd hoped she'd change her mind. He didn't really know what he expected, really..., couldn't blame her either, right ? He'd beaten around the bush for as long as he could remember to be honest, since they'd known each other. Each time he'd told himself he'd missed a chance to do something about all this what, he didn't know because, of course, they were stuck in this situation.

But he kept on blaming himself for a lot of things, everything in fact : not telling her in the first place then pretending nothing was happening between them when it was obvious she plainly worshipped him and all she wanted was for him to send a sign to her that this was it, that he wanted her no matter what obstacles they'd have to overcome letting her think she could get away with it by marrying this damn Shanahan, when what he really wanted was beat the hell out of this guy, not because he was a dork, but just because he had set his eyes on her...

God, he had to stop thinking about all this there and then or he'd get mad. A huge headache was building at the back of his head and threatening – again – to engulf his whole brain : since he'd left the base for DC, his migraines had kept coming and going, only eased by the painkillers he'd taken regularly to avoid being remembered as the General who'd gone on sick leave the first day he'd settled in his new position.

When he'd left the base, Daniel and Teal'c had taken him to the airport and he'd told them he'd call as soon as he'd have his office line ready, which he had, hoping that this was the reason why she had not called him yet. 'Course she had his cell phone number but maybe she thought she shouldn't reach him that way... Come on, Jack, you're deluding yourself, he gushed. How stupid can you become ? She's not called you because she doesn't want to talk to you.

He'd had Daniel on the phone and had incidently asked about Sam. Jackson had stated he'd dropped the package at her place and then had left not knowing how she'd reacted to the letter. Daniel had surmised it was not any ordinary goodbye gift and letter Jack had asked him to deliver personally, but Jack had been very privy about it and Daniel, for once, had decided it was in everybody's best interest not to intrude. That was something... Daniel not being his usual nosy self ! Jack could have chuckled at the thought if he had not been so preoccupied.

Daniel had even been very evasive about Sam's behavior these last few days : he'd only said when asked about her « health » that she was doing good, as usual, had a lot of work and even seemed to be fairly happy.

Jack had cringed at the thoughts of Sam looking happy : that was it she had finally gotten rid of him for good far from the eyes, far from the heart... She could finally move on... What did he think ? That she would be moved to tears by his gift and letter, would grab the phone and tell him that she loved him too, that she would wait for him to come back and slide that ring around her finger...

He'd made a fool of himself. He should have taken the risk of endangering their careers a long time ago, when he'd still had the chance to do so instead of waiting for her to get tired of him. Some years ago, things would have been different but he was an old man now, his greying hair looked almost white and he could see the lines on his face boring creases into his skin making him look exactly his age, and even more. He was definitely not in shape to sweep her off her feet, especially not her who was so much younger than him.

He'd been sure of himself when he'd written the letter but now, away from her and her sky blue eyes which had made him so confident for so many years, he felt he had been wrong about asking her to marry him : he was too old for her damn, he could almost be her dad, for crying out loud !

He'd really screwed the whole goddamn situation : if he had kept his big mouth shut, they could have remained « friends », so to speak, and he could have gone on seeing her from time to time, loving her at a distance. But of course, he'd never learnt to keep his mouth shut it had gotten him in a lot of trouble over the years as a soldier and in his private life. Damn, Jack, you're an ass !

While Jack was flaying himself for all the things he thought he'd done wrong, unaware of what was going on miles away from him, Sam was humming in her lab. She'd come to work that morning with a bright smile on her face that would have earned her a « morning sunshine » and a grin from her General had he still been there. But that morning she didn't mind. She had put a lot of thinking into all that, wondering what was the most appropriate way of reacting to the present situation. She was a logical person who always pondered her decisions knowing rushing into something was not the wise thing to do.

Sure she'd been enthralled when she'd received his letter but she wanted to take time to think about what she should do best. So when Daniel had implied he'd talked to Jack, that Jack had given him his office phone number and had asked about the « team », she'd not asked him about how he was doing and had not insisted on getting the phone number.

Daniel had been blabbering about Jack telling him he had a huge house in one of the nicest districts in town but he'd had the impression she was not listening as she was finishing her lunch.

What he had noticed was that, for once, she'd not gotten herself jell-o but a nice piece of chocolate cake when asked about it, she'd bantered that finally she could lay her hands on cake, now the General was not there anymore to eat all the pieces. Daniel had blinked but refrained from saying this was kind of a cruel retort and Teal'c had only raised an eyebrow which had been quite eloquent.

She needed time to plan her next moves. She didn't want to screw things like she'd done it with Pete. She'd been so mean with him, the way she'd let him go. Men like him or O'Neill deserved to be treated better. So while everybody on base was wondering how she could stand being there with him gone to DC, Sam was going through her routine of work, research, reports, interrupted only when she needed to get a cup of coffee or make a few phone calls, some of which were not precisely meant for her job. After all, she had a life beside work and she intended to live her life to the full now Jack was in DC. So she'd planned carefully for her weekend, starting in the morning with packing a few clothes and toiletries for the two days ahead.

Having decided what she exactly wanted to do and how she wanted to do it, and having made the arrangements, she felt lighter : what was done was done. She had a plan and needed to carry it out. Then she would feel relieved.

Then, Daniel unexpectedly barged in, pushing the door open, not even giving her time to react : « Say, Sam I've got something on my mind and really need to get it out before it really drives me crazy. » Sam looked up at him from her desk, taken aback by his sudden alertness. She had thought he would have had the decency to leave her alone for a little longer, at least, she'd hoped, until things were settled as she wanted them and she could shut him up for good.

« Well, Daniel, nobody has ever succeeded in making you shut up when you wanted to say something, so go ahead : spit it out... »

Daniel made a face : « Thank you very much for being so supportive, especially as I'm doing this for you ! », he added, his pride obviously wounded. « Sam, what the hell is going on ? You haven't asked once about Jack you don't listen to me when I talk about him you haven't even called him since he left for DC... I know because I... well, I checked with him », he added sheepishly, seeing her scolding look. « I'm worried about you two... »

« Well, Daniel, we might be friends but it's no reason for you bothering me with things that are none of your business ! », she replied indignantly.

« None of my business ?! Well, that takes the cake ! Really ! I mean, we've had to watch you swooning over him all those years, getting sick at heart for not being allowed to be with him and now he's just been gone a few days, you act like he's never existed ! I even heard you humming just before entering your lab ! », he added with an accusing look, « Really, Sam, what's come over you ? »

« As I've just told you », she said, pushing him towards the exit, « mind your own business », and closing the door behind him. Then a crooked smile dawned on her face. It was almost time to leave work and she couldn't help thinking about the great weekend she was ready to treat herself to.

Back in DC, Jack had finally left work early, as he was not really in the mood for organizing himself for his new job. He'd barely grunted to the people he'd met, being true to his reputation of the guy you shouldn't piss off or else... His migraine had not improved and he'd decided the best way to get rid of it was to go « home » to his fancy new house, courtesy of his new job, and go to bed early.

He shrugged off his uniform, took a hot shower, changed into his blue pajamas and settled in bed with the tv on and a bowl of blue jell-o for his dinner : how pathetic was that ! It was the only thing he had in his kitchen, apart from a few beers in the fridge, frozen pizza in the freezer and fruit of the loop cereals in one of the kitchen cabinets. He didn't even feel like having one of those yummy chocolate sponge cakes he'd seen in the window of the bakery around the corner. Jell-O ! That was all he had left from her...

He finished the bowl looking gloomily at a rerun of the Simpsons on tv : even Homer couldn't lighten his mood. He was utterly depressed, feeling like a fifteen-year-old as he caught himself checking his cell phone for texts or missed calls every ten minutes. Pathetic was exactly the term that now defined him best ! Not handsome, or rakish or even sarcastic, no, only pathetic...

He sighed, switched off the tv and lights, after taking another aspirin, and then tossed and turned until he got tired enough and finally drifted off to sleep.