The next couple of weeks were like a roller coaster, some days better than others, but all of them better than before. Yuki had to admit that having his brother-in-law around wasn't as bad as he had thought it would be. The man mostly kept to himself, was great at all the household chores, comforting when needed, and - above all - quiet. All the rules were followed and after a while of just sitting around doing nothing, Uesugi actually got around to writing again. He was able to get chapters at a time finished, giving them to Tohma to take to his editor, where he would take notes on what she said and return later with them. Most of the time, his editor was quite happy with what was written and had absolutely no qualms at all about printing as is.

The writer was still a little depressed and often thought of his pink-haired brat. He was always battling for happiness now that his baka was gone, and he was always the first to fall in that battle. He wanted to know what it was like to win over all the obstacles that stood in his way. He wished he knew what he could do to make up for all the wrongs he done to Shuichi, wanted to learn how to treat him right so he could show him the man he was inside. He dreamed of his little one coming back to him and saying he needed him, saying those three words he missed so much, to pull him from this abyss he'd fallen into. His nightmares revolved around it all and he rarely got the amount of sleep he required, ending up taking naps in the middle of the day or dozing off while working or watching TV. Once, he'd even fallen asleep during a meal and woke two seconds later with spaghetti sauce covering his face and bangs, Seguchi laughing hysterically next to him. He had tried so hard to be mad, but the lack of happiness and the laughter that filled the apartment was all it took to get him chuckling. It took a good long while to calm down, he was so deprived of the feeling, and when he did his newfound roommate helped him clean off.

One day, Tohma and Yuki were lounging around on the sofa, watching TV intently. The president of NG had gotten his brother-in-law hooked on a soap opera, though he liked it for an entirely different reason. The novelist watched it to criticize, picking out the so-wouldn't-happen moments and using the overall plotline to help him with his books. He realized by watching that there were some things he wrote that were just terrible! So, every day at three o' clock, the two blonds would gather some snack or another and sit down to watch the show. Eiri's phone rang just as a commercial played and they both smirked a little at the perfect timing, but neither got up to answer. The answering machine picked up and they heard the newly recorded message that had so desperately needed to be changed - it had been Shuichi's voice before and driven Yuki up a wall every time it played - then Ryuichi's happy voice played through the room.

"Ne, Shuichi! Where are you, na no da? Kumagoro misses you! We want you to come color!! I haven't seen you in a loooooong time and Kumagoro's worried, na no da. Did you and Yuki-san have a fight?" He gasped loudly. "I hope not! Well, Kumagoro's gonna try your cell phone. Bye!"

After a moment, the machine beeped and a little light flashed to say there was a new message. The two men said nothing as they sat there, the TV completely forgotten. It seemed like an eternity before Tohma excused himself to the kitchen, saying, "I'm gonna go get some more juice. Do you want anything?" He was answered with a shake of the head, so he trailed into the kitchen, letting the door swing closed behind him.

The writer sat there a long while, Ryuichi's words playing through his head like a broken record. Did you and Yuki-san have a fight? Did you and Yuki-san have a fight? Did you and Yuki... He forced himself to stop the flow of the words, sighing softly to himself. He'd been having a fairly good day up until that. It made everything rush back to him in a wave of despair and now he just wanted to drink himself into a coma. In fact, that was exactly what he planned on doing, he'd just have to wait a while so he didn't walk in after his sister's husband sat down and seem like a jerk for not accepting the offer to have something brought to him. Speaking of which, where was the man? He strained his ears to find some sign of what Seguchi might be doing in the kitchen - it was taking too long to simply be getting juice - and he heard whispering. He stood slowly and crept toward the door, standing near enough to hear but far enough to bolt away and make some kind of excuse.

"Yes, Shindou-san, I know, but- ... Yes, I understand. I can't keep making excuses for you, though, Shindou-san," he heard. "You're just going to have to call him and tell him something yourself... What you tell him is your business and I'll go along with it if it comes up in conversation... Yes. Yes. Well, it's just that aside from me not being able to help much more than I have, Ryuichi-sama has called several times and I had to erase the messages and caller ID before Yuki-san found out. You should have seen the look on his face just now when he heard it. He was okay before that, but now he seems so sad... Yes, I'm sorry. All right. All right. Goodbye."

Yuki made no effort to move away from the door when he heard footsteps moving toward it, didn't even avert his eyes when Tohma opened the door and stared at him in surprise. The man smiled at him, but it wasn't the genuine one he'd been getting as of late, it was the business smile, the polite I'm-hiding-something-and-so-not-gonna-tell-you smile.

"Who was that?" the author asked, wanting to make the man say it to his face. He's been talking to Shuichi behind my back! Keeping him updated, damn it!

"Oh, that was K-sama. He wanted to ask me about a few things dealing with the promotion of the company and where he stood in the decisions to be made." The lie slid from his tongue so easily it made Eiri sick. He narrowed his eyes at him, wanting to say something, but not yet knowing exactly what he wanted to say; did he want to just confront him, or did he want to make him say it somehow? "I have some errands I need to run for one of my superiors, then I'll stop by the grocery store. I'll be back as soon as I can, all right?" He didn't even wait for an answer as he slipped into his shoes, pulled on his furry coat and hat, and made his way out the door.

Growling, Yuki stormed into the kitchen and grabbed himself a beer, sitting down at the counter, popped it open and chugged it down. He returned for a second and finished it in record time, getting up for another too many times to count until he was too drunk to stand straight. He grabbed himself a last one and headed through the bedroom to take a long bath and try to relax as best he could. He stumbled through the rooms, almost falling several times as he stripped down and turned on the water. Once it was warm enough, he plugged the drain, and once it was filled, he got in. He leaned back against the edge of the tub, stretching out, and opened the last beer he wanted for the day. He sipped at this one, taking his time and savoring the tart taste of it. His hazy mind revolved around all the bad things that had happened lately and how that stupid Sakuma had reminded him of it. The more he thought about it, the more he realized that he truly no longer wanted to live.

"I have nothing left," he murmured drunkly. "I lost it all when I lost Shuichi."

He finished off the bottle of beer, the numbness of his drunken state slowly sweeping over him and he pushed himself down beneath the water. At first it hurt when he breathed in the water and coughed it back up, only to breathe in more, but after a moment he felt like he was floating. It seemed as if all his troubles had left him and the only thing that mattered was now, seeing the room through the water that rippled a bit above him. He felt deliciously free and finally closed his eyes to the welcomed blackness that tugged at him.