PENNY FOR YOUR LAUGHS

ANNA WAS REARRANGING THE SHELVES WHEN BLYTHE WALKED THROUGH the door, carrying a cardboard box in her arms.

"Good morning Mrs. Twombly," she said.

"Hello, Blythe," Anna said. "What's in the box?"

"Something for Pepper," Blythe replied. "Her owner left it to me earlier to give to her later."

That sounded rather odd to Anna. Why would Mr. Clark leave something meant for Pepper in Blythe's hands instead of just sending it into the day camp along with the little skunk? It didn't make much sense, but she figured it was better off not questioning it.

Blythe made her way to the day camp, relieved that Mrs. Twombly believed her lie. She wasn't going to tell her that Pepper herself had asked Blythe to order this package for her. How would that go over with her? She'd look like an idiot. Even worse, Mrs. Twombly would start to get suspicious. If she knew that Blythe was ordering things for the pets without her consent or permission….

It would be fine. Mrs. Twombly didn't question much about what Blythe did with the pets, just as long as the pets were taken good care of. Which they were; Blythe loved these seven pets as though they were her own, and even though they were animals, they had become some of her closest friends, even moreso than her actual human friends.

She opened the door, stopping the pets as they were playing.

"Got a new package for you, Pepper," she announced as she set the box on the floor in the middle of the room.

"Well it's about time this thing showed up," Pepper said as she pushed the box away from Blythe. She ripped the box open, tearing the cardboard apart with her claws.

"This box smells weird," Penny Ling observed.

Pepper pulled a pair of red clown shoes out of the packing peanuts. A thick green substance was leaking out of them. "It's may latest comedy prop – pistachio pudding shoes!" She chuckled. "You think they smell funny now, Penny Ling, wait until I wear them in a little bit." She slipped the shoes on and began trudging around, while the other pets began tearing into the box, ripping apart the cardboard, chewing on the packing peanuts, playing in what was left of the box. Pepper waved at them, trying to catch their attention. "You guys! Pistachio pudding shoes! Isn't it hilarious? Come on, give me a little chuckle or something."

"Well, I guess it's a little funny," Sunil said.

"A LITTLE?" Pepper repeated. "You guys should be laughing packing peanuts out of your noses! What gives?"

"I'm going to be honest with you, Pepper," Sunil continued. "The pudding thing's kind of gotten a little old."

"You guys, it's pudding," Pepper protested. "Pudding! It's like number two on the list of funny things, right behind mashed potatoes! Everyone knows this! It never gets old. Remember the flower with the pudding filling, how I would spray you all with it? You laughed like hyenas!"

"We've never had a hyena in Day Camp before," Minka said.

"The whoopee cushion," Pepper continued. "The whoopee cushion filled with pudding. You laughed your fur off! Well, except for Vinnie; geckos don't have fur."

"I could," Vinnie said.

"The tuba!" Pepper cried. "The tuba, you guys! Everyone loves the tuba of pudding!"

"We weren't laughing," Zoe said. "We stopped laughing after the flower gag. Face it, Pepper, Sunil's right. The pudding thing's kind of run its course."

"Well…." Pepper thought about it for a moment. She did only remember the other pets laughing that one time, when she sprayed them with the flower. Any time after that, the laughs were either faked or they just didn't laugh at all. "I suppose it is getting a little old."

"Understatement of the day," Russell whispered to Penny Ling. They all wrinkled their noses as Pepper, in her sadness, released a foul stench.

She went to go lay in the corner. It was clear how upset she was; pudding was one of her favorite comedy routines. To even consider something different – to someone like Pepper, it was nearly impossible.

"It's okay, Pepper," Penny Ling assured her with a gentle pat on the back. "You can be funny without pudding."

"You just need a new shtick," Blythe suggested.

"I've got plenty of sticks," Pepper said. She pulled a pair of sticks out of her prop box. "But they're all filled with pudding." Green pistachio pudding leaked out of the tips of the twigs.

"No, no, no," Blythe said. She pulled a mop out of the closet and began cleaning up Pepper's mess. "Shtick. A routine. A new form of comedy."

Vinnie climbed to the top of the mop's handle. "Like funny dances." He leaped off of the mop and did a quick dance step, only to slip in some of the pudding and slam his head into the wall. "Ouch. Need to work on that a little bit."

"Don't move!" Minka yelled. She grabbed Vinnie by the tail and threw him against a nearby canvas. He fell off the paper and plopped to the floor, leaving an outline of his face and body on the paper. "I call it 'Essence of Vinnie'."

"I call it a gecko who needs to be wiped down," Blythe said as she ran a wet cloth over Vinnie's head. She turned back to Pepper. "Maybe you should try another style of comedy. Try something without props. Standup, you know. Those redneck guys, that guy with the dummies – sometimes – just stand up there, tell jokes and funny stories, and who knows." She finished mopping up the floor. "Anyway, I've got to get to school. I'll see you guys this afternoon." She wheeled the mop bucket back into the closet and headed out the door, into the main shop, and out into the city.

"Bye, Blythe! See you later!" the pets called after her.

All except for Pepper, who was thinking about what Blythe had said.

A new shtick, huh? But what could that new routine be? She glanced out onto the shop floor, saw a pug walking around, his flat face practically glued to the floor. She poked her head out of the pet door to get a better look.

The dog was leaving a trail of slobber behind him as he walked, drool oozing out of his mouth. It was disgusting, the slobber he was leaving behind practically drenching the floor, leaving puddles in his wake.

"You know," she said, "asking me to try a new routine is like asking that pug to keep the slobber IN his mouth." She heard the other pets laughing at what she had said.

Even the pug couldn't help but chuckle. "Never heard that one before," he said.

"Could be because you breathe as loud as Niagara Falls!" Pepper retorted. Again, the other pets laughed.

Everyone except for Penny Ling, who didn't think what Pepper had said was that funny. In fact, it sounded hurtful. Hurtful and mean. Didn't she know how rude her comments were, even if they were just simple jokes? Was she intentionally trying to hurt that poor dog's feelings?

"That is actually kind of funny," Zoe said.

"It's funny because it's true," Vinnie put in.

They're laughing at that? Pepper thought. Hey, I think I just found my new shtick! She looked over to Mrs. Twombly, who was whistling while she dusted one of the shelves off with a feather duster.

"Wow. Mrs. Twombly's whistling is so bad that even the birds have to cover their ears." She listened while the other pets laughed. The mailman came through the door. He pulled a small bouquet of roses out of his bag and handed it to Mrs. Twombly. "Hey, I've seen that guy before. Though I had to pay admission to the zoo!" Again, the other pets laughed. Even Sunil's usually annoying high-pitched laugh wasn't as unbearable as it usually was. "That reminds me – Sunil! Calling your laugh annoying? That'd be an insult to annoying people!"

She relished as the other pets laughed, even Sunil, who seemed to be unaware that he had just been made the butt of the joke.

"Call me crazy," Zoe said, "but I think I'm going to love your new shtick."

"You're crazy," Pepper said bluntly, causing the other pets to crack up.

Again, except for Penny Ling. Didn't anyone else see how rude the skunk was being? They were all rolling over themselves with laughter, not seeming to care that Sunil and Zoe had just been insulted. Was this really the future of Pepper's comedy routine? Insulting pets and people?

She turned to Russell, the closest pet to her. "Russell, don't you think Pepper's being a little mean?"

"She wouldn't hurt anyone's feelings on purpose," Russell assured her. "Look – everyone's laughing and having a great time."

Well, I'm not laughing, Penny Ling thought.

################################

"Okay, class! Ready for the tip-off!"

Coach threw the basketball into the air. Joann caught the ball and dribbled to one end of the court, past the Biskit twins, who were just standing on the sidelines, not participating, almost as though gym class was beneath them. Given their personalities, that wouldn't have come off as much of a surprise.

"I so hate gym class," Brittany said.

"Especially this dumb game, whatever it's called," Whittany agreed.

"Yeah. Like, who invented this? Oh no." She put her hands up, blocking her face as the ball came bouncing over to her. Both girls flailed their arms as the ball bounced in front of them, afraid to so much as touch it.

Coach blew her whistle. "Biskits! That's double – uh, quadruple dribbling!"

Blythe was watching from across the court, joined by Youngmee and Sue. "Well, can't say they didn't dress for the occasion."

The twins ran across the court with the ball, only to trip over it, falling over each other.

The ball was picked up by the tallest girl in class, Vi Tannabruzzo. "Sorry, Biskits, but clowns shouldn't be playing basketball," she taunted. She threw the ball at a basket, the ball slipping through the hoop, through the net, making a perfect shot.

"That was just a lucky shot, Vi," Whittany shot.

"No, lucky is you two not tripping over each other while trying to even walk," Vi taunted. "Seriously, can you two do anything right on two feet? It's like watching a pair of newborn deer trying to walk for the first time."

"Well, well…." Brittany said. "Your hair is, is…."

"Puffy!" Whittany finished.

"Better than your basketball skills," Vi shot back.

"Wow," Sue said as she and her friends watched from the other side of the court. "Vi's being pretty mean. She's actually humbling the Biskits. I didn't think that was possible."

"I can't take this anymore," Blythe said. She started walking towards the three girls. "Hey, Vi. Look, I know it's the Biskits, but you don't have to be so mean to them, so knock it off. Why don't you pick on someone your own size." She looked around; Vi dwarfed everyone in the room by at least a good twelve inches or more. "If anyone like that even exists outside of the NBA."

"Eh," was all Vi said before tossing the ball through the hoop and walking away.

"Blythe, we were powerless against Vi," Brittany said. "We had to use all of our energy for, like, that running thing."

"Well, Vi was being kind of a jerk," Blythe admitted. Even if she was being a jerk to the two of you, she silently added.

"Yeah, but you defended us," Whittany said. "So now, like, you're one of us."

"Wait, what?"

"We're totally willing to forgive you for being so rude to us before," Whittany said.

"Excuse me?" Blythe asked. Blythe, rude to the Biskits? No, it had to be the other way around. It was the Biskits who were rude to Blythe, insulting her in front of her father, in front of her friends, trying to humiliate her during the fashion show that saved Littlest Pet Shop from going out of business, having their robot throwing her out of Largest Ever Pet Shop with a total ban of four weeks – not that Blythe would ever want to go back in there if she didn't have a good reason. Who were the Biskits trying to fool?

"You're our new BFF!" the twins announced.

"Wait, WHAT? No!" The twins practically dragged her across the floor, out of the gymnasium. As they went, she turned to Sue and Youngmee, who were just watching in disbelief. "Help," she whispered.

###################################

The pets had gathered around for Pepper's new standup routine. Insult comedy was proving to be a big hit, better than Pepper would have guessed. Who needed pistachio pudding when you could just make snide comments about someone? It was all in good fun, of course – Pepper would never intentionally hurt anyone's feelings; she was just having fun with it, and letting the other pets have fun too.

The only pet not here was Penny Ling. Why not? What could be more important right now than Pepper's new shtick?

"Hey, guys, if you stand real close to Zoe's head, you can hear the ocean! Hey Minka. You got that far away look – the farther away you get, the better you look! Russell, Russell, my main hedgehog, I heard you had a good idea once. Too bad the poor thing died of loneliness."

Penny Ling came over to the crowd as they were laughing. She gently pulled on Minka's tail, getting the monkey's attention.

"Minka, aren't you upset that Pepper just insulted you? I mean, you really don't mind at all?"

"She was just making a joke, Penny Ling," Minka assured her. "You're taking all this a little too seriously, don't you think?"

Penny Ling backed away. She didn't think she was taking Pepper's "jokes" too seriously. She was the only one who saw what Pepper was doing, the only one who wasn't laughing, who wasn't finding it the least bit funny. She wasn't even chuckling.

Pepper was trying a new routine, and Penny Ling could respect that.

What she couldn't respect was how her jokes were at everyone else's expense.

##################################

"Five grain, seven grain, whole grain, no grain, and what do I do? I leave the sprouted grain at home," Youngmee complained as she looked at the food on her tray. She pushed the tray aside. "How can I eat my sandwich with only four of the five mustards I need?"

Sue reached into her purse and pulled out a can of cheese. She squirted some cheese on a cracker and handed it to Youngmee. "Here. This usually makes me happy."

"Thanks." She turned to Blythe, who was just sitting down.

"Lunch is served," she said as she prepared to bite into her hamburger.

"There you are!" Jasper cried. He was under the table, looking for something. Something he had apparently found, as he sat up straight, something small and white held between his thumb and index finger.

"And what, exactly, were you looking for?" Sue asked.

"My final project for rice painting class this term," Jasper said. "I painted the Taj Mahal on this grain of rice. Impressive, yes?"

"Overachieve much, Jasper?" Youngmee asked.

Sue elbowed Blythe. "The whole school's talking about it. You know, how you're best friends with…them."

"It's not true, is it?" Youngmee asked.

"Of course it's not," Blythe answered. "They just took my standing up for them in gym class a little too seriously. They're overreacting, that's all. Knowing those two, they've completely forgotten it and have gone back to hating me for no reason at all."

Just then, an older man dressed in a black tuxedo came to their table, carrying a large tray. On the tray was a folded piece of paper, like some sort of an invitation.

"Message for one miss Blythe Baxter from Misses Whittany and Brittany Biskit."

Blythe picked the paper up off of the tray and read what was written on it. " 'You are cordially…ORDERED…to join Whittany and Brittany for, like, lunch. BFFs only, please RSVP'. Look at this. It's engraved in…is that real gold?"

"Répondez s'il vous plait," the man said as he walked away.

"Okay, listen," Blythe said to her friends. "I get that it's…you know, them…"

"Right," Youngmee said.

"And they're pretty awful."

"Bit of an understatement," Jasper said.

"But…."

"There's always a but, isn't there?" Sue asked. "What is it?"

"They're trying pretty hard to be at least a little nice to someone," Blythe said. "So maybe they deserve a second chance? You know, just to humor them a little bit?"

"Yeah, I vote no," Sue said. She crossed her arms, a scowl on her face. "But, you know, do what you want. Who's going to stop you?"

Blythe looked down at the invitation, looked back to her friends – Jasper was examining his grain of rice, Youngmee was quietly eating her lunch, and Sue had turned away from her. She looked around, making sure no one was looking, before slowly getting up and making her way to the twins' own private table.

She'd been offered a chance to sit here before, on her first day. She had declined then because of how snooty the twins had been to her. But this time, they were at least trying to be nice. They might have had their memories of who the mean one was mixed up, but it was the thought that counted, right?

"You sure took your sweet time," Whittany said.

"I can only be here for a minute or two," Blythe said. She was about to say something else, but the twins spoke up first.

"Garcon!" Blythe felt a chair slide under her, forcing her to sit down, and the man from earlier, the man who had delivered the invitation, pushed her up to the table. "That's fancy for, like, waiters and stuff," Brittany said.

"Um…." She watched as another waiter, a younger waiter, rolled out a table cloth, complete with plates, silverware, glasses, and candles. "Thank you…?"

The older man returned, this time carrying a bottle of lemonade like it were a Champaign bottle. "Lemonade, mademoiselles?"

"Yes please." He popped the cork and poured the yellow liquid into two glasses. The twins swished it around, gave it a quick sniff, before drinking it all in one gulp. The butler refilled their glasses, then filled Blythe's. "To our new BFF." The twins raised their glasses in a toast.

"May she not totally botch this up," Brittany said as the twins drank.

Blythe tried to emulate the twins, only to end up spilling her lemonade onto the table. "Oops. Sorry."

The butler returned again, this time wheeling a cart with him. On the cart was a bowl of salad, which he began to stir and toss. He procured two incredibly sharp Ginsu knives from the table, slicing the vegetables while they were still in the air. They landed neatly on a plate, which he place in front of Blythe. "Viola."

"Okay, that was pretty cool," Blythe said before realizing what was coming out of her mouth. She clasped her hands over her mouth and turned over her shoulder, looking back at her friends, all by themselves at their usual table.

While she was turned away, the butler began cutting up raw fish for sushi, like he were working in a hibachi restaurant, working the knives faster than Blythe could follow. Within a few seconds, faster than Blythe could even see, he had fixed the fish, vegetables, and fruit into a structure resembling a Japanese pagoda. Blythe couldn't help but join the twins in applause.

He placed a bowl of fruit next to her. "For the mademoiselle, a twenty-one berry flambé." He pulled a blow torch from under the cart and set the berries ablaze, somehow not setting off the school's sprinkler system.

"I didn't even know there were twenty-one kinds of berries," Blythe said, amazed. "Heck, I can barely name four or five. Youngmee is going to flip her lid when she hears about this." She turned around. "Youngmee, look!"

Her friends were gone.

####################################

No one really knew how Russell was able to play games on that smartphone without fingers or opposable thumbs. Maybe Minka had taught him. But that didn't matter right now; he was off by himself, as were all the other pets, napping or playing with their toys, or in Minka's case, splattering paint on the canvas.

"Russell, hey Russell," Pepper said. "I've got a question for you."

"Not right now, Pepper," Russell told her. "A few more experience points, and I'll level up."

"Yeah, yeah, sure, hey – is it true you're afraid of marshmallows?"

"Yeah," Russell said. "Can't stand them. Not sure why."

"Maybe because they remind you of your pudgy belly!" Pepper said, poking Russell's tummy. She laughed as she ran off, leaving Russell alone, contemplating what she had just said.

"Hey!" he cried when the other pets started laughing at him. "Are you saying I'm fat?"

"No, no, nononono," Pepper replied. "Though I do think your food bowl should come with a life guard!" The other pets started laughing at her joke – except for Russell and Penny Ling.

Pepper put a foreleg around Zoe. "I'll never forget the first day we met, Zoe," she said kindly. Then, snidely, she added: "But I'm going to keep trying!"

Zoe laughed for a second, before realizing what Pepper had just said. "That's not very nice."

"Lighten up."

"Lighten up? Really?"

"Yeah," Pepper said. "It's a joke. It's funny!" She climbed the tree to talk to Vinnie, who was hanging upside down from the play tube. "Hey Vinnie, your brain must feel good as new, since you NEVER USE IT!"

"Hey!" Vinnie protested, but he lost his grip and fell to the floor before he could continue.

Pepper hurried over to Sunil, who was playing in a small box. "Sunil! You're so boring, sheep count you to fall asleep!" Over to Minka, who had just peeled a banana. "Minka! I'd like to help you out. You know where the exit is? Hey, Penny Ling!" She looked around, but there was no sign of the panda. "Anyone seen Penny Ling?"

"Pepper!" Zoe hissed. "You know how sensitive Penny Ling is. You tell one of your 'jokes', and she'll either flood the room with her tears or explode in a fit of rage; who knows how she'll react!"

Pepper waved a dismissive paw. "You're exaggerating. Besides, Zoe, aren't you the one who said this new shtick is hilarious?"

"It was, for a little bit," Russell said. "Before your jokes started getting a little too mean."

"They're not mean," Pepper protested. "They're funny. I haven't even shown you my best ones. I'll prove it to you." She started hopping around the room. "Penny Ling! Come out come out wherever you are!" She spotted Penny Ling hiding in the fire hydrant in the corner. "Hey, Penny Ling! Get out here, have a laugh! Trust me, it'll be so funny you'll cry!"

Slowly, Penny Ling came out of the hydrant. "Um….Okay."

Pepper could tell she was nervous, but she wanted to do this. She wanted Penny Ling to hear a joke. She was the only one who hadn't had any joke made about her, mostly because Pepper hadn't seen her. And now that she had found her….

Penny Ling came down the slide, stopping just in front of Pepper.

"Okay, here it goes."

"Take it easy, Pepper," Russell reminded her. "Remember. She's really sensitive."

"Cool your quills, Russell, I'm a professional. I know what I'm doing," Pepper assured him. "Here, watch." She turned back to Penny Ling, who was looking at Pepper and wringing her front paws together in nervousness. "Hey, Penny Ling, my panda pal. You have a soft heart."

"Oh, um….Thank you, Pepper," Penny Ling said.

"And a head to match!" Pepper shouted. She laughed. "That was a good one, right?" She turned to the other pets. "Right?"

The other pets were just glaring at her.

Penny Ling whimpered. She couldn't believe what Pepper, her best friend, had just said to her! How could she be so mean? How could she be so rude, so insensitive?

"Pepper! That wasn't very nice!" Russell scolded.

"Don't be silly," Pepper said. "I've got one or two more. Listen to this one." She turned back to Penny Ling. "Penny, just remember, talent isn't everything. Actually, in your case, IT'S NOTHING!" She started cracking up at her own joke.

Penny Ling felt so hurt. Why was Pepper saying such mean things?

"Pepper!" Russell screamed. "You've gone way too far this time!"

Pepper was about to say something, but before she could even open her mouth, Penny Ling started sobbing – bawling.

Uh oh.

The other pets rushed over to Penny Ling, pushing their way past Pepper, Sunil even walking over her to get to their panda friend. They all gathered around Penny Ling, hugging her, patting her, trying to calm her down.

Everyone except for Pepper, who had just now realized what everyone was trying to tell her. Her insult comedy may have been funny for a few jokes, but after a while, her fellow pets began to take her jokes personally, began to feel insulted, humiliated, and worst of all, angry – angry at the jokes, angry at the jibes.

Most of all, angry at Pepper.

And now, she was beginning to feel angry at herself.

She had ignored the warnings, ignored the pleas to stop, ignored Russell and Zoe telling her to stay away from Penny Ling with these jokes, told her how sensitive she was. Pepper had paid no attention to them, and now, she had just seriously hurt her best friend. How could she? How could she have been so blind to what the other pets were trying to tell her? How could she have turned into such a monster?

Pepper had just done something deplorable, and she had no way of knowing if she could reverse it.

########################################

Blythe put her books in her locker and slammed it closed. Youngmee and Sue were on the other side, waiting to speak to her.

"What's the big deal about having a lunch?" she asked.

"It wasn't just any lunch," Sue said. "It was a five course lunch that lasted nearly an hour and a half."

"Okay, so it was a big lunch with the Biskit twins," Blythe said. "So what? I only did it to be nice." Sue and Youngmee just glared at her; clearly, they didn't believe her. "But it's definitely over. No more being the Biskits' BFF. No more lunches, no more nothing. Au revoir, Francois – that's the butler's name. Guys, you're my real friends. I don't need those two kissing up to me just because of one moment this morning in gym class."

A package dropped into her hands, a package delivered by two small bluebirds. The birds flew away, allowing Blythe to open the box. Inside was a tablet. A video was ready to play.

Blythe was apprehensive, but curious. She pressed the button to play the video.

It was a video message from the Biskits.

"Hi BFF," Brittany said.

"Hope you, like, like this little message," Whittany said. "Meet us at the mall after school."

"Oh wow," Blythe breathed. "This is so cool. Uh…." She turned to Sue and Youngmee, who had just started walking away.

#########################################

Blythe did as the twins had asked and met them at the mall after school. They'd told her that they were going to help Blythe look like them, talk like them, act like them.

Normally, Blythe would have protested, but considering how hard they were trying to be at least a little nice to her, she figured she should do this. Figured it was the best thing to do.

Though the twins didn't have to cling to her as they walked from store to store, sticking to her like lost puppies.

BRITTANY AND WHITTANY: Be our friend, our friend forever

Our best friend for ever and ever

Be our friend, our friend forever

Our best friend for ever and ever

For you see, if you be

Our friend forever, it would be

Too cool to be for real

So if you are our friend, you see

BRITTANY: And I will be

WHITTANY: And you know I'll be too

BLYTHE: And I'll make three

I'll be your best friend too!

BRITTANY AND WHITTANY: Be our friend, our friend forever

Our best friend for ever and ever

Be our friend, our friend forever

Our best friend for ever and ever

O-M-G, we could be

Best friends forever, it would be

Too cool to be for real

So friends forever we shall be

WHITTANY: And I will be

BRITTANY: And you know I'll be too

BLYTHE: And I'll make three

BLYTHE, WHITTANY, AND BRITTANY: We'll all be best friends too

Wait a minute, Blythe thought as they made their way from one store to another. Is this really me doing all of this?

####################################

Penny Ling hadn't come out of the fire hydrant for what felt like hours. She had sat alone, sobbing quietly after what Pepper had said. The other pets had already scolded Pepper numerous times for not listening to them and not knowing when she was going too far with her insults, even if they were merely meant to be harmless jokes – even the most harmless joke could seriously wound someone on the inside.

Zoe walked over to the hydrant, hoping to console Penny Ling. "You know, Penny Ling, Pepper was just trying to be funny. She didn't intentionally mean to hurt anyone's feelings."

"I didn't think she was very funny," Penny Ling sobbed.

"This reminds me of something I once heard," Sunil said. "Crying is easy. Comedy is hard. And that stench is doing a number on my nose."

That scent was coming from Pepper, who was sitting alone in the corner, sulking, upset and angry at herself for what she had done, what she had become, all because she wanted to find a new shtick.

"You know, Pepper, you don't have to be over there by yourself," Russell said.

"Honestly," Sunil said, "I prefer her over there. The stench isn't as bad."

"How could I have been so blind?" Pepper mused. "How could I have done something like that? I made Penny Ling cry. She's never going to forgive me. I'm not sure if I can even forgive myself."

"To tell you the truth, you're kind of making our eyes water a little bit too," Vinnie said.

"We understand what you were trying to do with your new shtick," Minka assured her. "You just wanted to make everyone laugh."

"Wait a minute, that's it!" Pepper cried as she leaped to her paws. "I got it! I can make Penny Ling feel better!" She hurried over to her comedy box, hoping to find something to help her create another new shtick.

#####################################

Blythe and the twins were in the cosmetology section, sampling various makeups and perfumes. She's had a surprisingly fun time with the two, despite their history together – they'd given her a lot of nice things, a lot of new clothes, these new makeups and perfumes. She was starting to wonder why they were even at odds with each other all the time.

She turned to the twins after applying some new lipstick. "Well, girls, what do you, like, think?"

"It needs to be shinier," Whittany said after studying Blythe for a few seconds.

"And if you're going to use eyeliner, make sure it, like, matches," Brittany added.

Whittany picked up a brush and dabbed it into some powder. "Here, let me help you." She brushed some of the makeup over Blythe's eyes. "Look now."

Blythe turned back to the mirror. Her eyes were now surrounded with dark purple makeup, the same shade as her lipstick. "Check it out. I match."

"Maybe," Brittany said. "But you've still got a long way to go before you can ever be as glamourous as us. It's not something you can just learn."

"We were born with it," Whittany added. "But don't worry; we'll guide you."

Brittany applied some more eyeliner. She spotted someone nearby, someone not quite as glamourous as them. Her hair was messy, and there wasn't even a drop of makeup on her face.

"Look at her, Whit," she said. "There isn't enough makeup in the whole mall to help a girl like her."

"Oh, yeah, you're right," Whittany said as she joined her sister. "Well, it wouldn't be so bad if she didn't have one glaring flaw – her hideous face!"

Blythe joined the girls in laughing at this person. "Sounds like she has the face of a flower – a cauliflower, that is!"

"You need to work on your insults, too," Whittany said.

Blythe leaned out from behind the mirror to see just who they were talking about. Her heart sank, and she felt anger rising inside of her.

She had unintentionally joined the Biskit twins in making fun of Sue.

She turned back into the mirror, studying herself as hard as she could. Ever since what happened this morning, she had started turning into the one thing she hated the most – a stuck up spoiled brat who made fun of everyone without seeing her own flaws.

She had slowly been turning into one of the Biskits, and insulting Sue – that was the last straw. She wasn't going to let this go on; she wasn't going to let the twins twist her anymore, not if it meant alienating her true best friends, not if it meant abandoning them for who many considered to be her rivals.

What is happening to me?

###################################

Pepper had tried everything she could to lift Penny Ling's spirits. She tried the usual knock-knock jokes, she tried the old slipping on a banana peel gag, she dropped something heavy on her head, she told funny stories based on her owner's antics.

Nothing she did would make Penny Ling so much as lift her head off of her pillow.

She did a silly little dance; she juggled Russell, Vinnie, and Sunil; she even tried tickling Penny Ling – of all the pets in Day Camp, Penny Ling was easily the most ticklish.

Still, nothing.

Pepper felt so distraught, so upset, so angry at herself. Why didn't she stop when she had been told to? Why didn't she listen to Russell? She felt so terrible, felt like she had accidentally ended her friendship with Penny Ling.

A friendship ruined, all because Pepper did the wrong thing to try to make the other pets laugh.

#####################################

Blythe didn't want Sue to see her, not like this, not in this outfit, with this makeup, hanging out with the twins. How could she? She couldn't bring herself to leave her hiding place beneath the table, not even when the twins showed up.

"You know, Blythe, I couldn't help but notice that that girl looks like one of your old yucky friends," Brittany said.

"We can, like, totally understand you hiding," Whittany said.

"Yucky friend?" Blythe repeated as she stood up. "I'll have you know that Sue is an amazing friend! One of the best! The kind of friend you two will never have or ever be!"

"Whoa, Blythe, can you, like, calm down?" Whittany snapped.

"What is your problem?" Brittany asked. "Do you have any idea how many people out there would love to be our BFF?"

"I pity them, then," Blythe said.

"You weren't complaining earlier when we were giving you stuff," Whittany growled.

"Well, there's the problem," Blythe hissed. "I like the stuff more than the two of you."

"What did you, like, just say?" Whittany snapped.

Blythe stepped up to her, pressing her face against the other girl's. "Let me, like, put this in a language your tiny Biskit brain will understand, Whittany – the stuff is nice; you two are not."

"Then you can say goodbye to all your stuff," Brittany growled. "Francois!"

The butler ran into the room, scooped up the shopping bags near Blythe, and hurried back out the door. The twins followed him a second later.

Whatever, Blythe thought.

"Blythe?" Sue called as she ran over to her. "Wasn't expecting to see you here."

"Hi Sue."

"Blythe, you look terrible. What happened to you?"

"The Biskits, sadly. Sue, listen. I didn't mean to make you feel unwanted. I'm sorry if you think I tried to trade your friendship for the Biskits'. I got so caught up in trying to be nice to them that I forgot who my true friends were. Can you ever forgive me?"

"Of course I can," Sue said. "Just do me one favor."

"What's that?"

"Clean that stuff off your face. You look ridiculous. By extension, lose the outfit. You look, well, stupid. An outfit like that belongs in the trash."

They both shared a good laugh as they walked out of the store.

#######################################

Blythe was surprised to see all the pets so downtrodden. Something had happened here, something to cause the normally playful and talkative pets to be so quiet, so melancholy. But what? What could have happened? Did someone get sick?

"Someone mind telling me what I missed?" she asked.

"Pepper tried a new shtick," Russell explained. "It didn't go over so well."

"And it led to the end of a once beautiful friendship," Pepper said as she lay on the floor near the tree, a foul stench coming off of her.

"You want to talk about it?" Blythe asked. "Tell me what happened? Maybe I can help."

"Like Russell said, I tried a new shtick," Pepper explained. "Insult comedy."

"Seriously? That's not exactly what I had in mind when I brought it up this morning."

"Yeah, well, I got too carried away, and I hurt Penny Ling's feelings. I've done this before by accident, but this time, it was so much worse than the last time. I don't think she'll ever want to be my friend again after what I've done."

"I think I know what you mean," Blythe said. "I did something like that today with Sue, but it's okay now. It got rough for a moment, though."

"But how'd things turn out okay with Sue?" Pepper asked.

"I just apologized, and that was the end of it. Problem solved."

"I don't think it's going to be that easy for me and Penny Ling."

"Or it could be the one thing she's waiting for," Blythe suggested. "It's worth a shot."

"Yeah, I guess you're right." She waddled over to Penny Ling, who was still lying on her pillow, face buried in the fabric. She raised her head when Pepper got close, but never lifted her body. "Hi, Penny Ling. Listen, I – I didn't mean to hurt you like that. You know I would never do anything to hurt you on purpose. I was thinking about myself and my jokes and not anyone else's feelings, and I took things way too far. Penny Ling, I'm really sorry. Can we still be friends?"

Penny Ling slowly stood up. She walked over to Pepper, staring at her, unblinking.

She pulled Pepper in for a tight hug.

"Apology accepted," Penny Ling said.

"I'm just glad we can still be friends," Pepper said.

Penny Ling stepped back. "Wait right here; I've got something for you." She hurried back to the fire hydrant, came back with a pistachio pudding pie.

"For me?" Pepper asked.

"Yeah, but, there's something funny about this pie," Penny Ling said. "Do you think it smells funny, Pepper?"

"I don't' know," Pepper said. "Let's find out." She sniffed the pie, allowing Penny Ling to push it into Pepper's face, covering her fur and eyes and snout with pudding.

The two friends shared a good laugh, glad to have put everything behind them.