A/N: The usual, thanks to everyone who reads, follows, adds this story to their favorite. An extra special thanks to those who take the time to write reviews. I am glad you guys are all enjoying this story. Since the last chapter was a little slower this one will be a bit faster pace. Again things will be answered in flashbacks and as the story progresses. Any of you that have read Wide Awake this story is similar to the way that story was written. Also for those of you that have read Back to Your Heart I promise I will not use that ending with any of my other stories. That ending was strictly meant for that story only not every one I decide to write. I do apologize about my editing skills I am no professional but I gave fair warning in my profile. I write for the story and the plot the editing well you guys are lucky I use comma's lol. Everything will come together I swear. Hope you guys like the next chapter. Enjoy!
Tamsin was glaring back and forth from the shifter to the doctor. It clicked in her head, "That is why you kept running to Montreal whenever you could. You weren't doing the doctor you made her. You told us when we were with Bo's father that Lauren took your DNA and switched it making Taft Cabbit instead. You left out what happened to your DNA." She put all of her attention on the blonde shifter, "Looks like now we know." Everything finally made sense.
Lauren let out a low growl. It came from deep within but stopped when she felt her brother's hand on her shoulder. He turned her to face him, bending down so he could look in her eyes, "Control your wolf." He knew that the doctor learned to control the wolf awhile ago but Tamsin was a sore spot for Lauren. The brunette returned home and had a whole new girlfriend. He was there when the two became a couple and it gave him time to adjust to it. The shifter didn't like it but he had to accept it. Despite everything he did start to like Tamsin, they all did, maybe not Kenzi and Lauren but the rest of them did. But the blonde shifter had every right not to like her. Lauren told Dyson what Tamsin did, how she went to her place to gloat about the succubus. How she had to hear it from the Valkyrie not her girlfriend.
It was Bo who interrupted the wolf's thoughts as she glanced at Dyson, Lauren and Kenzi. "Wow and I thought we were moving forward but guess I wasn't important enough to tell." She was hurt and was making it known.
The tiny human was sympathetic, "Bo bo remember when that wacky dude had everyone switching bodies and I was in Dyson? You asked me what it was like in there and I told you that I never thought I would say it but it wasn't my place to tell you. Well there you go sister so not my secret to share. You think you are surprised try being mwuah. I thought I found an injured doctor instead she glanced up at me her eyes turned gold she whispered out my name and passed out cold. Bruce picked her up and I was like what the fae is happening here."
Dyson grinned thinking of when he first found them hiding and Kenzi told him the whole story of how she found his sister. He was so grateful she listened to the doctor and was willing to believe her. "It wasn't my place neither Bo." He wanted to tell the succubus but it wasn't his story to tell. Besides Lauren was now the closest person to him. They were forever bonded together.
This time Lauren was the one to talk. "Bo I should have told you but when I came back there were the elders, the new Ash and your relationship."
The brunette's eyes were filled with sadness. She understood why Kenzi and Dyson couldn't tell her and it finally made sense why all of a sudden the shifter was always going to the doctor. The succubus understood why Kenzi did for awhile. She spent six months with just Lauren and Bruce a serious bond was formed from that. When she came back things were different since Bo was with Tamsin. The goth had a hard time trusting the Valkyrie since the whole druid potion thing. It made sense when the human wanted to leave with the doctor making it no less painful. No matter what Lauren said though the fact remained she just didn't want to tell Bo. That is what it all came down to in the brunette's mind. "In the many times we ran into each other you couldn't have said, hey guess what I'm no longer human?" There was no way the succubus was going to let this slide.
"We never really talked for that long and it isn't a five second conversation. Oh hi Bo, you out doing a case, well I got to get back to the Ash, by the way I'm a wolf shifter now, see you tomorrow." She was trying to control the wolf in her but Dyson was right ten months ago giving into anger was so much easier now. Keeping control of yourself and your temper seemed almost impossible. Thankfully when she was human she always had a certain demeanor to her and that carried over to her new fae self.
Vex came over throwing his arm over the brunette, "Looky looky lou who has come out clubbing. It is the energizer succubunny." He kissed her cheek, "Missed you love." He gave Tamsin a nod. The Mesmer remembered how snippy she was with him when he briefly lost his fae abilities. She barely could pretend to care mimicking him. Oh the dark doesn't want me the light doesn't trust me and I don't have any friends. It was something along those lines. The dark fae saw the somber expression on the succubus, "Tonight is a party. The doc is freed and the wolf can love again."
The guilt got to the doctor. It wasn't like her to be standoffish especially to Bo. She knew when she came back to Toronto four months ago she avoided her but a lot of time has gone by since then. Seeing the hurt in the brunette's eyes pained the doctor. She knew to be careful with her heart that she only got one chance to give it away. They all had to watch Dyson and she didn't want that to be her. Lauren went over to Bo, "Can we talk alone outside?" She wanted to explain to her but not in the loud club. It took the blonde shifter completely off guard that the succubus showed up. The doctor went out of her way to avoid the brunette when she was still in Toronto. Once she got to Montreal she left the room every time Kenzi was on the phone with her. She just started to be able to be in the room when they were on the phone.
Once they were outside Bo wasted no time. "Have we drifted that far apart that you can't even talk to me?" She made no attempt to hide the pain in her voice or on her face. The brunette knew part of her would always belong to the doctor she just didn't realize how much until now. Seeing Lauren again after four months was like a dream. At first it felt like a nightmare watching Kenzi kissing her but once she knew the goth was playing around is when it felt like a dream. Just laying her eyes on the blonde was surreal.
"When Dyson found us he told us we had to talk to the elders I barely heard a word he was saying because all I wanted to hear about was you. Why I haven't seen him or you in the past five and a half months. What was going on with you and when he said that you were taken by your father after you left Taft Industries, I blamed myself. I went out of my way to be as heartless as I could be to you so that Isaac would spare your life. I thought if I did it differently I could have been the one to save you for once." The blonde shifter couldn't hide the tears in her eyes. It was a painful memory of how she was towards Bo that day so many months ago. The look on the succubus's face when Lauren was talking to her, hoping that the mad scientist had her brain washed, saying that she knows who Lauren is and that Bo loves her.
The brunette closed the small space that was between them. It was instinct. She ran her fingers through Lauren's hair the way she did when comforting the blonde. "You saved me many times. I never forgot any of them since the first time I met you since then you have been saving me." Her eyes resembled what they looked like when the doctor asked for a break. The tears kept threatening to spill but didn't.
The doctor had to turn her face down. She didn't want to stare into those chocolate brown eyes it would be her breaking point. The wolf gave her strength but it seemed that even that part of her was weaker to the succubus. Actually she knew if it wasn't for the wolf she probably would pull the brunette into a passionate deeply missed kiss. That also could be the wolf part of her; the inner animal had that tendency. "After Dyson told us all that then he let me know about you and Tamsin. It was painful to hear especially after she was the one to tell me about the kiss. The kiss that happened before your Dawning after you missed my award ceremony. At the Dawning what happened with Dyson then hearing that it cemented it for me we were over I just didn't realize it. I was foolish to think a succubus could be in a relationship." The doctor still couldn't meet her eyes going back through this was heart breaking.
"You were a fool for not telling me this. That was why you wanted the break? I knew I was an idiot I should have put you first all the time. Training for the Dawning ruined everything. I should have been there for the award. There were many things I regretted from the second you told me you weren't happy. So many things I wish I could go back and do over. You're right I did cry over Dyson because I love him like I love all my friends Lauren. He sacrificed his life for me and any one of my friends who did that I would save. I would never let anybody I love die for me." She took a step back sensing that the blonde shifter wasn't completely comfortable. "And I wish I could go back in time and be the one to tell you about Tamsin. But I wasn't and I can't change that. I can tell you that I didn't tell you because at the time it meant nothing." It really did mean nothing back then. Since she thought the doctor didn't want her anymore when she said, and I loved you, past tense, it was only then that she went to Tamsin. In her father's world when she was walking the path on the dark side the Valkyrie was her version of Lauren. It was sick and twisted but it worked for the succubus. When she started to cross that barrier back to the light she knew no one could replace the blonde. She accepted that the doctor didn't want her anymore and didn't want to push it so she gave her all to make this work with the blonde dark fae.
The blonde shifter finally met her gaze. She spoke softly, "There are things we all wish we can change but we can't." She gave a light smile despite the tears in both their eyes, "I am sorry I didn't tell you but I became a shifter ten months ago in Taft's facility. The full transformation took about a week. I went through a lot and managed it thanks to Bruce and Kenzi. The first time I fully shifter was out of pure anger. The rage kept building and building and then I felt immense pain like my limbs were being ripped apart. Now the shift is easy," thinking of who she has become warmed the doctor's aching heart.
Bo didn't care if it was wrong or right she crossed the small distance between them in two steps putting her hands on the side of the shifter's face before pulling the blonde into a kiss. This was missed the familiarity of it. The heat, passion and desire that kissing the doctor always brought out in Bo only this time it was intensified because of her inner wolf. There was much more passion behind it and it pulled at Lauren's inner animal. As the kiss deepened she heard a low growl from the blonde as she spun the succubus around so Bo's back hit the building they were just inside. It didn't matter to her all that mattered was this moment. Lauren back in her arms where she belonged holding her close as their tongues danced around each other. Suddenly it stopped the shifter pulled away her eyes glowing yellow while Bo's were blue. "I can't," she whispered before walking past the brunette back into the club.
The brunette didn't move. She wanted to savior the taste of the doctor in her mouth. The succubus wanted to close her eyes and still feel her body pressed against hers. There was no way she was going back in to the club to break out of this feeling right now.
Lauren went over to Dyson and Kenzi once she was back in the club. Her brother saw the pain in her eyes and leaned over the bar asking for a double. He handed a drink to the goth and to his sister before they all threw them back. Vex, Tamsin and Hale were right near them. The doctor actually felt bad that she allowed the kiss to happen. She might not be close to the Valkyrie but she was cheated on and it didn't feel good. She wouldn't do it to her worst enemy which she knew wasn't the blonde dark fae.
The wolf smelled that oh so familiar smell on his sister, "Careful you get one chance." He was reminding her knowing the pain he had to go through and not wanting it for her. Dyson was very protective over Lauren now.
She pat his hand that was on the bar. "Remember when you told me that you were partial to bar fights and howling at the moon? Who knew one day I would feel the same way?" She glanced up at him seeing that famous grin he always put on. Knowing she wasn't getting out of it, "I am careful with it. I keep my heart under lock and key. Besides after what I have been through with Bo I wouldn't just hand her my heart." That seemed to satisfy the shifter as he pulled her into a hug.
"Okay then so do you want the bar fight or howling at the moon?" He could sense she was starting to calm down. It was a pack thing not a made sibling one.
The brunette came back into the club and headed over towards her friends. Tamsin gave her a questioning look but decided to let it go for now. The Valkyrie always suspected that the succubus never stopped loving the doctor. She remembered going there when the brunette was in the bath and her talking about Lauren. That they were on a break, of course the blonde fae knew that was bullshit. No one was on a break and completely disappeared and didn't answer calls but Bo looked so hopeful that she would be able to fix it with her that she didn't have the heart to tell her. Even when they were with her father she was sure he was going to kill her but at Bo's insistence he didn't. It was pure luck. When the brunette was blurring lines the Valkyrie was pretty sure her vision blurred with it. It was the only logical explanation she could think of that the succubus suddenly wanted her. She was the Lauren replacement but the dark fae went with it. She wanted to sleep with Bo so it didn't matter to her. The pop of a champagne bottle brought her mind back to the present. "A bit much don't you think," she rolled her eyes at their enthusiasm.
"This is worrisome Tamsin rolling her eyes at liquor. Listen crumpet just enjoy the festivities it's a party you can whine if you want to." Vex saw the note the bartender had with the bottle, "Oh look another present from Katy." He glanced over at Lauren, "I think the new Ash is trying to get you to do some undercover work darling."
"Katy is the Ash," Bo was confused she could have sworn Colin told her that the Ash's name was Ava.
Dyson laughed at the Mesmer, "We all call her that but her name is Ava." The music was loud it was hard to hear and he wanted to have the party of the century for his freed sister. Kenzi was already filling the glasses all though he watched her steal a few sips already. He couldn't help but chuckle at the human he claimed.
The succubus still was trying to figure it out. "Of course it makes sense to call Ava, Katy, because they sound so alike."
"Have I not taught you anything," the goth handed the brunette a flute of champagne, "Ava is Katy Perry's twin. Like insanely similar and she lurvs Lauren. Sent us here in a Escalade Limo, got D-Man his love back as a gift for Lauren and now this very very expensive bottle of champagne. And I know my liquor," the tiny human was feeling all the alcohol she was drinking.
"Oh," was all the succubus said before guzzling down the champagne. It was good and normally she hated champagne. Great so Lauren is a wolf that gets one chance at giving away her heart and the person who has a crush on her is her new boss. That also helped Lauren be freed, gave Dyson his love back, and looks like Katy Perry. That is just frigging amazing. This is the luck I get. I finally am back with everybody and this is the information that is told to me. I won't lose her. The brunette needed to think and the first thing she knew she had to do was get back into the doctor's life. They spent the rest of the night like they never separated. As if no one moved and that they all remained close. Kenzi tried her best to be nice to the Valkyrie. The rest of the night went smoothly.
NEXT DAY
Bo was walking around the Crack Shack happy to be back but missing everyone already. She got to see Trick in the morning since he didn't go to the club. They were all staying with Lauren in Montreal for another couple of days. When Bo and Tamsin said their good-byes that morning they started their drive home. In the car was when the Valkyrie confronted her.
"You still love her," the Valkyrie gazed over at the brunette while she was driving. She wasn't asking Bo she was making a statement.
The brunette stayed quiet not wanting to hurt her and trying to figure out the right words, "I didn't know how much till I saw her yesterday. I haven't seen her since she left Toronto." When she saw Lauren when she first came back from the woods it pained her. She knew a part of her heart still belonged to the doctor she just didn't realize how much till yesterday.
To Bo's surprise Tamsin smiled, "I knew you did but I enjoyed the ride while it lasted."
"You're not mad, upset, hurt, I don't know something," the succubus didn't want to hurt anyone else and was prepared to be screamed at.
The Valkyrie actually laughed out loud. "Dude it's not like I was planning to ask you to marry me. I just enjoyed screwing you."
Bo's mouth dropped open as she took her eyes off the road for a second to glance over at the blonde fae. "Real nice," she was teasing her. She felt relief that things weren't going to get weird between them.
"I know I'm pretty so most don't think I'm smart but I am and I knew better than to fall in love with someone who already was in love with someone else." Tamsin had the most serious tone since that time in the bathtub. It reminded her of that, "Back when I got into your tub and said those things to you, I already knew that you still loved the doctor. I can't blame you she is hot more so now that she isn't human."
She jumped from her thoughts when the door opened. "Stop dreaming of me naked in your bed succubus," the Valkyrie taunted the succubus once she saw her almost fall out of the chair.
"You can still live here it seems better than your car," the brunette felt bad that the dark fae felt the need to leave.
"My car has a solid roof. Besides let's face it, how long before we are hauling it to Montreal," Tamsin knew that Toronto wasn't going to be a part of their lives for much longer. She saw the way Bo kept looking at the blonde shifter all night. Even in the morning when Dyson and Lauren went out for a run before everyone else was awake, the look in the brunette's eyes that she won't be able to say good bye to her was pain filled. The succubus and her sunshine gang, as Evony called it, would always find their way back to each other. Dyson and Hale spent so much free time in Montreal that it was hard to enjoy time with them unless they were all working a case together. Since now Bo and Tamsin did a lot of private investigating. Trick was the one that they were with the most. She was sure if the succubus was going to head there the rest would be shortly following.
"I don't know Montreal has Katy or Ava, whatever the great Ash's name is," the brunette didn't want to think about the Ash who apparently had a crush on Lauren.
"Better move it succubitch. Your girl has one shot now if you aren't the one on the receiving end then you are screwed," to the Valkyrie that was sugar coating it.
QUEBEC – EARLY THAT MORNING
Dyson called Lauren's cell phone not wanting to wake Kenzi. "Hey," she whispered into the phone keeping her voice low.
"I was thinking since we didn't get any bar fights or howling that we could stretch our limbs. Care to join me," the wolf was propped against the outside of her hotel room.
"Be out in two," Lauren hung up her cell. She took paper from the hotel pad and wrote Kenzi a note to leave clothes out for her and Dyson behind the hotel. She went outside the room next to her brother.
"I think Bo is leaving early with Tamsin thought you might want to avoid the good-byes after last night," he knew it was hard for his sister and he was doing the brotherly thing.
"I said good bye to her last night in case I wasn't up when they left," she was amazed at how the wolf was able to read her so well lately. The longer it went on the less it shocked her. They got into the hotel elevators and went to the lobby. Going outside they felt the cool Quebec air hit their face as they walked around the building towards the beautiful mountains they were staying near. They walked into them as soon as they were out of eye shot from anyone passing by in the area the two kicked off their shoes as they stood back to back. Taking off their pants and shirts leaving on their under garments knowing that as soon as they fully shifted those would just rip off. It wasn't till Lauren in full wolf form heard her brother howl that she turned around. He was a darker grey and she was more of a silver. The two of them took off together running feeling the wind through their fur as they both felt the most free in this form. Lauren stopped for a second as she sensed something she was on a mountain with a clear shot of the hotel and she saw Bo getting in the car. She let out a soft howl before running back after her brother.
TORONTO
Bo got in her car she had no destination in particular just wanted to drive and clear her head. She was just on that long drive with Tamsin but she never got to think since she wasn't alone. She took off on the highway putting the radio on. Hearing the words play she was about to change the station but couldn't.
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I'm OK
But that's not what gets me
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that love in you
Is what I was tryin' to do
It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I'm doin' It
It's hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I'm alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin' with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken
What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say (much to say)
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that love in you
Is what I was trying to do, oh.
The words to the song hit the succubus hard. With tears steadily streaming down her face she turned her car around now knowing exactly where she was going.
Evony was sitting behind her desk yelling at someone on the phone when Bo walked in. She hung up, tilted her seat back as she stared at the brunette, "Oh good it's you the unaligned succubitch. How do you get past all my guards all the time?"
The succubus ignored the Morrigan's usual charm as she sat across from her, "You have no idea how painful this is for me, but I need your help?"
This caught the leader of the dark fae's attention the succubus coming to her for help had to be serious. Which gave Evony the power for once over this bitch, "Color me intrigued what exactly do you need sweetie?"
"I know you are dark fae but I also know you have ways to find out anything you want even if it involves light fae." Bo grinned at the Morrigan knowing this was her best shot. "I want you to find out everything you can about the Montreal Ash Ava."
Evony pushed her lips together before they broke into a wide smile. "The bigger question is what do I get out of it." The Morrigan finally had the brunette right where she wanted her. She needed Evony's help and she was more than willing to do it but at a price of course.
