Now a fight, and the problem with being a hero without a secret identity.


4 – Rule 5

"Well well well now," 'Bat Lash' loomed over the actual Batman, poking him with his gun. Thanks to the mask he didn't know what he was up against, but he was more focused on the pouches than what laid behind the cowl. "Trick-or-treat pops. Empty the belt."

"For candy?" Batman raised an eyebrow at his assailant. He wasn't about to open up his belt, especially since everything inside it was designed to take down criminals like these. He hadn't figured out a discreet way to take them down yet, but there were other things to worry about. Damian was shaking in his arms and he hadn't seen his other three children since before shots fired. Selina and Tim were taking everything well so far, but his date's instincts to run away were getting stronger and Timmy had always hated the sound of gunshots. She was ready to rabbit any second now, taking the kid with her.

"I doubt there's just candy in that belt." The bandit pulled back the hammer on the gun, pointed straight at the Bat's head. The sharp gasps around him were lost on him as his mind carelessly flew back to that fateful night long ago. Just what he needed, to relive his trauma when he was needed most by those he cared about.

Thankfully that was when the streamers above them decided to fall, along with a lot of balloon popping. The sounds and drifting papers out of the corner of his eye made him withdraw his gun in surprise. "What the hell?"

A dinner plate was thrown perfectly into his hand, knocking the gun out of his hand as it fired off into the ceiling. Cackling soon followed, along with other dinner plates being thrown around the room, knocking even more guns out of hands. "Hex! What's going on?! GAH!"

With a couple more solid plastic plates thrown into the man's body, mostly his head, 'Bat Lash' was down and out. All the gunmen jerked around towards the tables, pointing their guns at it. But they couldn't see anyone. It was too dark to see clearly. "Get out from under there! Or so help me-"

He didn't get to finish his statement 'cause another plate shot out of a darker area, hitting his temple hard and knocking him clear out. With the head of the group out cold, the others started to panic. And so did a certain guardian.

'What are they doing?!'

Batman's night vision lenses were on most of the night so he could see everything clearly. Jason stood near the tables, preparing something from the food and drinks lying about there. Cass was halfway up a nearby wall, climbing towards one of the decorative alcoves currently keeping certain high hanging items in place. Dick though, he was the kicker. The teen flitted around the room, keeping both out of the way and nearby to distract the men, throwing plates at odd intervals. And cackling. He was being the distraction.

"Show yourself!" one man panicked.

"Ya want me?" Robin jeered. "Ya got me!"

Within a split second, the teen was out of the shadows, charging at the second in command. He narrowly dodged each bullet fired at him before making it close enough to slap his gun arm away, then kicking him in the chest then face, almost walking up him. Immediately he flipped back to regain balance, crouched low and swiped a kick under his feet before he could even blink. No. 3 was down.

"That was fun. Who's next?" The kid grinned up at the next gunman.

"Son of a—"

That earned the bandit a swift kick in the teeth. "Watch your mouth! There's kids here!" A quick elbow blow to his neck took that one down. "That's rule 6 Calamity Jane."

"Get 'em!"

All at once the gunmen started charging at Robin, firing on occasion as they were wary of hitting their allies. The teen grinned at them, digging one hand into his own utility belt as he dodged each shot. Again he was in the air, flipping over his opponents, but also striking one of their nerves and tossing marbles and jacks at their feet to trip them up.

He weaved through them, heading back to the table while taking out the legs of another man with ease. The marbles tripped a few of them up, sending a couple of them sprawling and landing hard on the jacks, pointy ends diving into each of their skins.

As more shots were fired, the boy wonder slid under the table cloths, just as the table was flipped over for extra cover by Jason. During Robin's distraction, he had moved all the liquids onto the one table and now every kind of drink, from koolaid to wine, spread over the floor and onto the men. A row of cakes also splattered all over the guys left, blinding them temporarily and jamming a couple of their guns.

The string of lights above them dropped on their heads, all small, but already made unstable because of the previous shots fired at them. While blinded and distracted by even more falling ropes, Robin gained his second wind, leaping over the toppled table and grabbing the swinging cords to wrap around the remaining volatiles. Just as he finished his last go around the group, he tightened the makeshift lasso, making the men clash heads.

"I'll take it from here son."

Commissioner Gordon's hand grabbed Robin's shoulder, startling him slightly and nearly letting go of the cord he was using to strike out just in case. Behind him he could see other off duty cops coming out of the woodwork and tying up the down and out gunmen around the room. One of them was roping one he missed and another was being pinned to the ground by Barbara. He hadn't paid as much attention to others after he came out of the shadows himself. The crowd wasn't completely full of scared rich folk. His grand distraction made it possible for those brave few to take a hand and save the day.

Robin gave a relieved smile, relaxing a little. He handed over the last bit of the cord to the older man, letting go of the whole problem. "Just doing my part sir. And I think we've got this pretty much wrapped up."

"One can only hope." Jason came out from behind the tables at last, glad this fiasco was over. Cassandra dropped from her vantage point a few seconds later, coming towards them eagerly. Gordon was already at work, reading the assailants their Miranda Rights and cuffing them with zip ties. The three of them grinned at each other as the crowd gathered around them, very interested in their young heroes. "Not bad for our first time in the field eh?"

The boy wonder laughed. "Not bad at all."

"Hey kid!" Someone came up to the brightly colored mock hero, who was now a hero. "That was amazing! Where'd you learn all that stuff?"

"Oh, here and there," he tried, waving it off. Dick really should be getting back to his family, but the attention was pretty cool. He hadn't gotten this kind of attention for what he did since the circus.

"Kiddo! Jack Ryder, Gotham Channel Five. Can I get a statement?" The guy had a mini camera on him, a good quality one. Had he been recording the whole time?

"Holy…" Dick's eyes went wide at it. He wasn't shy of a crowd, but cameras still got to him on occasion. His early days with Bruce and those things always in his face were a bit traumatizing.

"Hey!" Jason jumped next to him. "Don't we get a say in this? We helped save the day too ya know."

"Don't take all the credit Dick," Cassandra piped in, still hiding behind her cowl. They both said it just to tease him really. Cass hated being the center of attention. It was one reason why her entire body was covered now.

The teen laughed, then hung an arm around each their necks. "Couldn't have done it without them! Jay here came up with that table thing and Cass came up with the end play. I was just getting all the bad guys' attentions. Shame about the cake though."

"I know, isn't it?" The kids laughed at their joke before more questions came their way, most of them aimed at Dick. He even pulled off his mask after five minutes of talking, grinning broadly as the news people and a few victims came up to talk and say thanks. All the while he could see a large dark form in one corner of the room, trying to get closer to him. There was a slight scowl on his stony face, despite the many distractions around him.

And that look did not bode well.


A/N: heh heh heh... liked the fight? I'm not that great at fight scenes, especially with multiple characters involved, but this one when fairly well. Jack Ryder is a real reporter in Gotham, and he just made Dick's life difficult. As for Bruce's reaction... Well, there's a bad side to being the oldest: you're responsible for everyone younger than you.

Rule 5 - When kidnapped, become as small and unnoticeable as possible, then find a way out. If they keep their attention on you, wait until you're alone with one of them before making a move to escape. Well behaved captives are left alone longer than smart mouthed kids, and aren't harmed near as much. Don't bother with revenge, just get out of there and somewhere safe as fast as possible. We can track them down later.

You'll be seeing a theme with the Rule Chapters. B3