Dearest Diary,

Finally, after years of watching Emmett play practical joke after practical joke, Jasper got fed up with it. He slammed his hands down, nearly breaking Esme's table. "What is that makes Emmett so damn insane?!"
"Jasper!" Esme scolded in return.
Emmett had been out hunting with Carlisle for the weekend and the rest of us, including Bella, were sitting around the dining room table.

"Well, I'd like to know," he said. "In fact, I'd like to see for myself."
Alice immediately stiffened, her eyes wide. Edward read her mind, stood up, and hastily grabbed Bella. "It's time to go," was all he said, and it seemed Bella understood.
Esme and I just stared at Alice, waiting for her to move.
"I'm declaring myself Emmett for the day!" affirmed Jasper.

Alice finally moved, slamming her head in her hands, and as if remembering something, suddenly stood and dashed upstairs. I heard things rustling in the closet of the room that belonged to her and Jasper, then came two loud ripping sounds. I looked at Esme and ran upstairs. Alice had pulled out a roll of duct tape, and tossed every possession she cared about in the closet, including her beloved vintage dress that was once worn by Audrey Hepburn. It was the only hand-me-down she had ever taken and she treasured it. She had used the duct tape to make a giant 'x' over the closet and wrote on a piece of paper; "touch anything inside, and your future shall be bleak'. She turned to me and with a frown on her pixie-like face said 'This will not and well.'
A scream shook me from my daze. It seemed Jasper had already begun. The scream had come surprisingly enough from Carlisle's room. I sped to his office and was shocked to see what my usually-composed 'twin' brother was doing. For his first prank, Jasper thought it'd be fun to rummage through Carl's emergency medical bag, find syringes, and play darts with them in a large target he had painted on the wall- with Carlisle fastened to the center. The syringes simply bent and bounced off Carlisle's body whenever one hit him, of course, but he still wasn't enjoying the 'game'. Jasper saw me standing by the door and aimed a syringe at me. I just rolled my eyes and turned to walk away. Right when I was about to turn down the stairs at the end of the hall, I felt something ruffle and whoosh past my hair, then saw the syringe plunge dead center into a portrait of Emmett. I turned to give him a glare, but knew what he had meant. It was his way of declaring himself, as Emmett would put it- 'the alabaster joke master'.

Well, I'm going to give the old 'to be continued' line right about now. I'm going shopping with Alice- and its fun leaving you in suspense. But don't fret, I shall write more soon.

Yours truly,
Rosalie Lillian Hale