I EAT PETUNIAS FOR BREAKFAST!
I'd tell you to ignore him but it's his fault we're posting this one late.

I did several stupids this time…
He sure did. Got all electronic items taken away.

Woops, I did it again.

*I am but a figment of the mind, but Bolddy is a dumbfuck* * = ghostly whispa this time

How do you do WORSE on a retake?!

I DON'T KNOW! But this test that I just took should be a 100% *Knocks on wood*
You better. I'd like to finish this fanfiction before my forties.

Now wouldn't that be fun….
Whatever. Let's get this chapter started. We're gonna do a little experimenting with this one.

We're not gonna' write anything! Just a blank page!
He's gonna kill me with his stupidity one of these days.

You just smell the words.
I don't even know anymore. I've learned to accept comments like that.

I'll kill all of you in your sleep.
I have abandoned all hope for his sanity.

*whispers* I am just a figment of the imagination, don't mind me. Doot Doot

With that said, FUCK YOU (Not really)! CHAPTER NOW!

1st person POV - Sarah

The first thing I noticed as I was waking up was that something was poking my arm. The second thing I noticed was that my head hurt like a bitch. I guess crying like a two year old can do that to you.
Ignoring my pounding headache, I opened my eyes only to see a maroon colored helmet above me.
"What the hell?" I said in confusion.

"You're awake!" Simmons yelled.

"DON'T LOOK OVER HERE!" Yelled… Someone who I thought was Happy..
"Where the hell am I? Wait a minute. You sound a lot like Simmons. Are the fucking reds and blues here too?!" I yelled in anger and confusion.
Just fucking great. First the freelancers make me have a mental breakdown and now I'm in what I assume to be a prison with the reds and blues.

"SOMEONE SAVE ME!" A voice yelled from behind me.

"SHUT UP!" Happy yelled in response… I still couldn't see anything behind me. Obviously, it's not like I have eyes at the back of my head.

I turned around and audibly gasped in surprise at the sight before me. Sarge was beating up a guard! I felt my anger from earlier today(?) resurfacing as I got up and walked towards them.
"What the hell are you doing?!" I yelled.

"Uh…" Happy started. "GRIF! PUT THE SACK OVER HER HEAD!"

The world immediately went dark as, presumably, Grif put a sack over my head.

"You saw nothing." Sarge said before… I think continuing to beat up the guard judging from the sounds that followed.
I pulled the sack off of my head. Of course Grif wouldn't hold me back after putting it on my head.
After regaining my sight, I got closer to Sarge and grabbed the closest object to me, which happened to be a book, and started beating him over the head with it
"Stop! Beating! Up! The! Fucking! Guard!" I said, each word following a hard hit to the head.

A shadow watched amusedly from the corner, not a person but a literal shadow. You don't need to worry your pretty little heads over it just yet. It doesn't even have any real relevance at the moment. It's just something I thought you would like to know is a potential thing. ((?: Haha! Yes my little shadows, appear!~)) ((Mr. Bold: Wat)) ((?: oH! Hahaha ahaha...nothing . . ;3))
I had felt like I had gotten my point across well when I was tackled from the side and forced into a bone crushing hug.
"Dear Christ thank you! I thought he was gonna kill me!" Said a voice. It came from the body that was currently gripping onto me tightly.
"What the fuck?! Get off of me!" I yelled while struggling. I had no fucking idea who this guy was! I tried to get free but because of how small I was, and how strong he was, I couldn't.
Why did I have to be so fucking tiny?!
"I am forever in your debt!" He said while hugging me tighter. It was getting kinda hard to breathe now. After about ten more seconds of this, I kneed him in the crotch and broke free.
"Don't fucking touch me you creep!" I yelled at him.

((Mr. Bold: Um… So… Do you know how to continue?)) (( : Nope.)) ((Mr. Bold: RIGHTY-ZERO! LET'S CONTINUE ON WITH THE PLAN!))

1st person POV - Happy (Previous day)

No matter what it looked like before, that was the day after the mall incident.

I was not in that day… Yet...

Anyway, I was in the cell with the Blues, and Sarah was in the adjacent cell with the Reds. It was fairly late in the day, as I could tell by the barred window.

Caboose grabbed me by my shoulders and started violently shaking me.

"WHERE IS CHURCH?!" He wailed despairingly.

"I DON'T KNOW!" I yelled back, very confused.

"He went into the car to hijack it, but then you tried to use a banana to do the same effect, but then we were caught." Tucker explained.

Caboose hummed before nodding, suddenly letting go of Happy and pulling the aforementioned banana out of seemingly no where. Perhaps from some sort of hidden compartment in his armor? Who knows and who really cares?

ANYWAYS, He holds it proudly with an exclamation of "I HELPED A WHOLE BUNCH OF BLUE GUYS TAKE NAPS WITH THIS! Cuz I like naps, and I'm blue. They were blue so they must like naps too! But they were being mean so I thought they probably didn't take their nap yet and were grouchy! So I sang them aaaaaalllllllllllllllll a lullaby and put them to sleep! They were just liiiike little babies Tucker!" He chirped before pausing and deflating a bit "But they bruised Mr. Yellow peel so I had to make some of them apologize to Mr. Yellow Peel! They…..didn't like that idea…." He sulked, cradling the bruised banana to his chest as he sat in the corner with a wail. "I WANT MY BEST FRIEND AND I WANT MR. YELLOW TO BE OKAY!" He curled up around the banana.

"That's… Nice… I'm… Gonna'... Go to sleep now…" I explained. I then promptly laid on the bed and fell asleep.

Well… Kinda'. I laid on the bed and blinked. When I opened my eyes, it was the next day.

"Hey! You've been asleep for a while now! Wake up!" I heard a voice… Simmons' voice… Say. "There's a weird Green-haired kid in here! She's unconscious!"

"Asleep for a while?" I inquired. "I just laid on the bed and blinked. I don't even feel like I just slept."

"Well, you were asleep for… 12 hours now."

"JESUS CHRIST!"

"And…. The Green Kid?"

"She's my friend. And… She's 14."

"Still a kid."

"OK."

I looked around, and saw both Tucker and Caboose asleep, the latter still holding a banana.

In the other cell, Sarah was unconscious, Grif was staring down the lock, Simmons was up against the bars, and Sarge was yelling at Sarah to no avail.

"I have an idea." I announced in my half-delirious state. "We wait for a guard and then we-"

"Hey! Stop that!" A cop yelled when he walked around to me. "No one's breaking out on my watch."

I didn't respond. I simply clenched my hand into a fist… And promptly punched him in the crotch.

"Take that!"

The guard grabbed his crotch and fell to the ground in pain. Tucker looked at me, guarded his crotch, and walked further to the back of the cell.

I bent down to get the keys from his belt, and I found them! But they were just out of my reach! Godammit!

Caboose promptly woke up and walked over next to me with a banana.

"Me and Mr. Yellow got this!" He exclaimed.

He then stuck the banana into the lock on the cell door and started turning it.

JUST BEFORE I FACEPALMED, IT FUCKING WORKED!

THERE WAS CLICK AND IT FUCKING OPENED!

"That…" I started, confused. "WHAT THE FUCK?!"

Calming down, I bent down and picked up the keys off of the guard. I then quickly unlocked the Reds' cell and let them out.

Sarge immediately burst out of the cell and started beating up the guard. Simmons started poking Sarah, and Grif got a sack… For some reason…

That's when it happened. The most horrible thing. Ever.

"What the hell?" I heard come from… Sarah's spot…
"You're awake!" I then heard Simmons yell in response.
"DON'T LOOK OVER HERE!" I yelled.
"Where the hell am I? Wait a minute. You sound a lot like Simmons. Are the fucking reds and blues here too?!" I heard Sarah yell. She sounded angry and confused.
"SOMEONE SAVE ME!" The guard currently getting beaten up by Sarge said.
"SHUT UP!" I yelled back at him.
Sarah suddenly turned around and gasped at the sight of the guard getting the shit beat out of him.
"What the hell are you doing?!" She yelled. She didn't sound happy. She sounded quite angry actually.
"Uh…." I started. "GRIF! PUT THE SACK OVER HER HEAD!" Grif put the sack on her head. But that's all he did. He didn't restrain her or anything. He just put it on her head and didn't do anything else. What kind of lazy idiot does that?! Oh wait...
I shot a glare at him, and he simply responded with a shrug of his shoulders.
"You saw nothing." Sarge said before he started beating up the guard again.
Sarah pulled the sack off of her head and grabbed a book. She then started beating Sarge over the head with it.
"Stop! Beating! Up! The! Fucking! Guard!" She said while continuously hitting him in the head. (( : Miss Author-Chan is too lazy to rewrite that scene exactly how it was in Sarah's point of view.)) ((Mr. Bold: Author-Chan? *Snickers*)) (( : Shut up you dick biscuit. I write what I want.))
After Sarah had finished abusing Sarge with a book, he was distracted enough for the guard to get free. He got up off the ground and tackled Sarah into a hug.
"Dear Christ thank you! I thought he was gonna kill me!" Said the guard while hugging Sarah. She didn't look too pleased about this.
"What the fuck?! Get off of me!" She yelled while trying to get the fuck away from him. It wasn't working. At all.

"I am forever in your debt!" He said while hugging her tighter. After about ten more seconds of this, she kneed him in the crotch and broke free.
"Don't fucking touch me you creep!"

"Not… Again…" He whispered as he fell to the ground. Sarah immediately turned to us.

"AGAIN?!"

"Yeah…" I started to explain. "That's… How we escaped….."

"By kicking him in the balls?! That's my job and you fucking know it!"

"Technically, I punched him."
"I don't care! Why did you hit him in the first place?! He was just doing his job! And was beating him up necessary?!"

"We needed to get out! And Sarge beat him up!"
"My point still stands!"

I started arguing with her for a while, but not much else happened.

((Mr. Bold: HORRIBLE SEGUE!))

3rd person

Happy and Sarah were arguing for quite some time when Tucker woke up and got the guard's ID.

"What the fuck kind of name is that?" He exclaimed as he read it.

"Give me that." Happy said as he snatched it from Tucker's hands and read it. "OH. MY. GOD. SARAH. LOOK."

"What?" She asked in response.

"It's… JUST LOOK?" He showed her the ID.

It was a normal ID, but what was important… Was the name….

'Yechezkel Wawrzaszek.'
"There's a fucking 'nother one?!"

"Have you met my sister Cristina?" Yechezkel asked. "She's nice."

"What does that say? Yellow?" Sarge asked after reading it. "And… Warchaloopee?"

"What… The. Fuck." Yellow (Sure. Why not) said, before falling completely unconscious.

"Shit. I think we killed Yellow." Happy proclaimed.
"He isn't dead, dumbass. He just fell unconscious. Probably because SOMEONE decided that it was a good idea to beat him up." Said Sarah while glaring at Sarge.

"Whatever. Leave him there. Let's go."
"Yeah.I'm fucking done with this and I wanna go home."
~~~~~~~~~Time skip to Sarah's house because fuck you~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sarah, Happy, the reds, and the blues had just arrived at Sarah's house. Why she let the reds and blues come still remains a mystery.
Sarah had just opened the door when a look of pure hatred formed on her face.

The freelancers were in her house again and she was not happy with them. At all.

She was beyond furious with them for what happened at the mall. They didn't listen to her, pulled their guns out, and got into a huge chase with the cops!

And to top it off, they left her there causing her to have a mental break down! Who wouldn't be pissed at that?!

"Sarah, you would not believe the day we…." Wash started. "WHAT IS THAT BEHIND YOU?!"
Sarah just glared at him and then turned to Happy, silently ordering him to give an answer for her.

"Um… In our cells were the reds and blues. Church excluded." He explained.
Before anyone had a chance to say anything, Sarah snapped on them.
"Do you assholes know the stress you have caused me over the past day?! I wake up, find you in my house, find out you locked my parents in their room, and SHOT MY BROTHERS FUCKING LEG OFF!" Yelled Sarah, But she wasn't done yet. Oh no, she was just getting started.

"Then, when we get to the mall, you fucking scatter and get yourselves into even more trouble! And THEN, when the god damn cops show up and I tell you to just let them arrest you, you instead pull your fucking guns out!" By this point her face was bright red with anger.
"Then fucking DELTA gives the bright idea to run! You wanna know what happened after you ran? I had a complete mental fucking break down! I was screaming and crying because I couldn't take all of the stress you put on me! I collapsed into a crying mess on the ground! I don't even fucking know what happened after that because I passed out! The next thing I know I'm waking up in a cell with these assholes, and one of them is beating up a guard!" She screeched at them while gesturing to the reds and blues with her hand. She was absolutely livid by this point.
She took a few deep breaths to try and calm down before speaking again.
"I hope you're proud of yourselves" She said as calmly as she could before turning and stomping up the stairs.

Then came a noise… A screech… From Sarah's room…

Wat
Sarah is not happy right now. And now she's screaming. Again.

What about her brother? It's been 12+ hours…
Uhhhhh. I'll get back to you on that one.

He's dead, isn't he?

No. He's just unconscious from blood loss.

Have we shifted over to Yellow?
Oh right, him. Why can't we give our OC's normal names?

Sarah's a normal name.
She is literally the only one with a normal name in the entire story so far. Cristina doesn't count.

Happy doesn't either, as his full name is Happy Spike Elliot.
My point still stands.

That was my point.

Whatever. Let's just get on with the crack filled train wreck that is known as chapter blanco. Again, I am not responsible for this one. It was all him.

You were slightly involved in idea-making. As was another mysterious voice…
Whatever, let's get this LSD trip over with.

?: *Cackling off to the side*

Back in the prison, there were more cops than just Yellow. In fact, there was a legion of cops.

Happy had a new idea this time. He pulled a small, red orb out of his pocket and threw it at them.

The orb hit the ground in front of the crowd and blew up, sending a red plasma to the crowd.

"Is this… Ketchup?" One of the cops asked.

"I love Ketchup." Happy stated before grinning like a madman.

A few minutes later, he was gnawing on an officer's leg, weighing him down.

The Reds and Blues had picked up various weapons to beat up the guards while Sarah was having another mental breakdown in the corner.

They (Reds and blues) were getting their asses kicked. Hard.

Then there was a noise. A loud, roaring noise. They looked in the sky, and saw a jet plane flying towards them.

The jet landed in front of the prison and transformed… IT WAS STARSCREAM.

He then started kicking and punching everyone regardless of who they were, cops or no.

Sarah then got off out of her mental breakdown and addressed Starscream.

"You've underestimated my greatest resource! Gang! Assemble!"

Then there was the noise of rolling wheels, as 32 6th-8th graders moved towards the prison on skateboards. Some were holding a banner that clearly said 'Fuck you Mom, I'm 12 now.'

They had BB guns, airsoft guns, toy lightsabers, slingshots, golf clubs, a couple Uzis, etc.

"I acknowledge your gang, and I raise you Mach 3." Starscream explained.

He then took an energetic stance with his head held high, roaring.

"I'M MACHING UP!" Was what he roared as a bright light surrounded him and he grew long, blonde hair.

He then yelled some weird word and a large beam of blue energy shot out of his palms at the gang, destroying everything around them, but not them.

"Yo we put on Sky Michaels, now we invincible." They announced.

"Not so fast." A voice announced. IT WAS NOE! "I have infiltrated your gang, and I know your one true weakness!"

"How'd you infiltrate us?!" Sarah asked.

"Simple. I put on slacks and the newest Sky Michaels and no one looked up from my shoes to see how old I was! AND YOUR WEAKNESS! IS! GOOD MUSIC!"

He then pulled out a really unpopular music player and started laying Beatles music.

"NO!" Was the collective screech as everyone in the gang disintegrated.

"And as for Starscream, I have previously poked a hole in your gas tank."

"Shit." Was all he said before exploding.

"How'd he explode? He ran out of fuel!" Happy exclaimed.

"Ikari Warriors logic." Noe explained.

Perfect. We're done!
I have no explanation for this. I'm sorry.

?: Meh, I haven't done too much this chapter, but don't expect this to be the last of me little Foxes! Arrrrrrrr! I be a pirate!

With the "Ikari Warriors" joke, there's a game called Ikari Warriors where you can get a tank. If that tank runs out of fuel, it explodes.
I'll just left him have his references. Mine will come later. See ya assholes, this chapter is over.