AN: DON'T KILL ME! This idea was given by a Guest reviewer!


I am the perfect human being. People don't give me a double take, they give me a triple take. Boys and girls fancy me alike. I have my own fan club. The rain stops when I walk outside. People ask me "Scorpius, how do you do it?" And I turn to them and say "Do not be afraid of hotness, some are born hot, some achieve hotness and others have hotness thrust upon them". If I even do so much as come in a ten-mile radius of a girl, they faint. But this is not always a gift. Yes, sometimes it is a curse for "With great hotness comes great responsibility." Unfortunately I have captured the heart of not one, not two, not even three but four Weasley family members. Yes, the obsessive Rose Weasley, the bully Dominique Weasley, the old but charming Nana Weasley and the innocent and naïve Roxanne Weasley, you know I askndjdlmsnd

Scorpius

WHAT THE FUCK MALFOY?! I DON'T LIKE YOU!

Roxanne

Look what you did! You made me scribble all over the page!

Scorpius

MALFOY HOW DARE YOU PUT THAT IN THE DIARY! I DON'T LIKE YOU!

Roxanne

No point denying it Roxy! You know as Mark Twain said:

"Keep away from people who try to belittle your hotness. Ugly people always do that, but the really hot make you feel that you, too, can become hot."

Scorpius

No he didn't! And don't call me Roxy!

Roxanne

I'll call you whatever I want!

Scorpius

I'm telling Dom what said about her!

Roxanne

WAIT! WAIT! I'll tell Nana Wealsey you swore in this innocent diary!

Scorpius

...I won't tell if you don't

Roxanne

Deal.

Scorpius