4. Like Clockwork

Skipper and I finally get back to the cabin. She plops down on my bed. I still do not understand why she does this. My clock reports that the time is now 11:23. I should change into pajama's but- I just feel too lazy, so I didn't. I lay on the bed, close to the wall. I wait for her to say something. She will, I know it. She'll get bored and say something. Skipper whines. My friend tells me that it is 11:36.

I don't talk to her. That would just be giving in again and I would lose much too easily. Slowly, I feel myself succumbing to the ruthless enemy, Sleep. My mind is going. My body feels numb. My eyes are so, so heavy. I have to close them. Sleep sends me a yawn. I feel him creeping up again slowly, slowly. So slowly. Sleep is warmer than usual, hie temperature above the freezing level at which he grabs me and holds me in causing me to be tense, causing me to be anxious. I like that he is warmer today. He is kind that way. But I can't allow myself to be sucked into the lies of my enemy. It is too late, for he has me in an iron grip, dragging me into a black void, warm and gentle, but hiding petrifying dreams. I suffocate the further deep I go until I can't feel anymore. I am now asleep.

I notice something strange and wrong with my deductions. It is so often that I call him an enemy, and so often that Sleep brings me to the conscious, living world in a screaming, sweating panic of a boy. I call him cold and I call him ruthless, but in all reality, he is trying to help me. He is trying to help me escape from an even greater hell that is Consciousness. It is not even Sleep who brings me back, but myself. I fight him too much even though he is trying to be a helpful ally in the war against an insanity which Consciousness keeps me in.

I feel myself coming back from the above freezing black void Sleep protected me in. I feel something. Why did I fall asleep? That wasn't supposed to happen!

Wake up...

Wake up!

I feel my mind's gears start to turn again. I finally register that Skipper has found a way, once again, to get her way, and, piss me off. Sitting on top of me once again, Skipper, who was looking highly satisfied, had her hands on my chest. She pushed me up to almost a sitting position with her legs. It hurt, when she did that. With one leg on either side of mine, she stood on her knees and looked at me her piercing blue eyes. I'm sure she didn't notice it, but her eyes slowly changed to a deep red fused with gold streaks, beautiful but deadly. She leaned over me pressing her lips against mine. I wouldn't return it. She moved on, tracing my jaw with the tip of her tongue. Stop it. Please. She wouldn't. Her tongue reached my ear. Damn! My breath caught in the back of my throat. From my ear her tongue traveled down my neck to my collar bone. She kissed my neck... And I liked it. I liked everything about it. Her soft hair, her warmth, her passion. I tilted my head up to the ceiling so she had more access to my neck. She kissed me endlessly. I moaned.

No. Please no. I don't want to... I don't...

But I did. I did want to. I wanted her. I- I...

I didn't protest as she came back and tried to put her tongue in my mouth. It was weird, kissing. Especially since I've never kissed anyone before. I don't even know how to explain it. I don't think I can even if I tired. All I knew is that I was losing to her. And for now, I didn't really care. Just like I didn't care when she frenched me, I also didn't try to stop her when she pulled off my shirt. Her arms were around my neck. Her hands grasped my hair and the back of my head as I kissed her back and with force. Now, I'm not sure when it happened, but somehow it did. Her shirt, I mean. It was lying on the floor. How did that get there again?

"Sk...Skipper," I breathed.

She continued with her erotic kissing. My breathing is so heavy that I can't hear myself think. She's driving me crazy. Her hand moves down. Down. To me. She manages to get my pants undone with one hand while the other massages the back of my neck. How does she know that spot? Skipper's hand makes its way into my pants. It's strange to me that she didn't go under my boxers. She grabbed me through the thin cloth causing me to moan. Again. There's a curious feeling from deep within me. Oh, gods please no. No. No, no, no. I can't so this. No. Please stop. Please. I can't take this anymore. I really can't. I won't.

"Stop," I let out through clenched teeth.

But she doesn't stop. She only grips me harder.

"Ah!"

She only laughs.

"Oh, baby... You like that, huh?"

Please stop... Please...I'm done. I'm done.

I push her away with force.

"Fuck off!"

With that, my pants are zipped. I grab my shirt off the floor and proceed to put it back on. I'm out the door before she even has time to register what had happened. The door slams shut behind me. I walk around with no destination in particular. I just keep walking. I don't know where I'm going. And I don't care. I have to talk to someone. I can't keep this in my head. Then I'll really go insane. But who the hell will talk to me now, at this time of night?! I stop. My eyes search for the cabin. Bingo. Very normal looking in the moonlight. If I squint I can almost see the gold. Cabin seven, dedicated to Apollo.

I have to go talk to Will...