"I came out of a portal. A portal in the sky."

Louise and Colbert were dumbfounded by this statement.

'The puppy must have fallen out of the sky with him. But how did this man survive? Drat! I can't believe I'm getting a plebian for a familiar! But...it's better than nothing...better than zero. I can remain a noble!'

Although Kratos enunciated clearly, Professor Colbert wanted confirmation.

"Come again?"

"You heard me. I was abducted by your summoning magic."


Oh dear. Abducted is such a confrontational word. This muscle bound man does not seem happy.

There have been recorded historical incidents involving the summoning of multiple familiars. In those cases, the mage took more than one familiar. His students never pulled out a human familiar though. Colbert would research this later.

This was the time to bargain. Colbert hoped this meeting could be ended without hostilities...and with Kratos bound as Louise's familiar.

Deep down, Colbert did not want to die, even though he did get emo at times for the deaths he caused in his soldiering days. It was thoughts of Karin ending him that made Jean want the contract ritual to proceed smoothly.

Colbert used to serve alongside Louise's mother in Tristain's military. Up to this day, Dutchess Karin "The Heavy Wind" de la Valliere remains one of the strongest, and most well connected mages in Tristain. He had no doubt that if Louise failed her summoning ritual and was expelled, her mother would hold a grudge against him, the man who taught Louise a good deal of her courses, and supervised the summoning ritual. She could make his life a living hell.


"I know sorry will not cut it. I'd still like to apologize for the problems this summoning caused you. Students never know what will come through the portal, though there are common familiars that vary depending on the student's elemental affinity and magical ability. We never would have guessed that you would come through the portal of all the creatures that could have appeared."

"Don't just make excuses Professor."

"I won't Mr. Kratos. Allow us to make amends. On behalf of the academy, I shall arrange food, room and board, and even transport for you. Please feel welcome here until we all work out the logistics."

That seemed quite nice of Colbert. Seemed being the keyword. Kratos knew better than to let his guard down around complete strangers, even if they were making him a reasonable offer to take responsibility for the trouble they caused him. Kratos was waiting for the catch.


Louise took in the words of the conversation, but she did not want this opportunity to pass her. Her life was bad enough without potentially losing her only familiar.

"A portal in the sky? Then my puppy came with this other familiar?"

Louise glared at Kratos, feeling upset that she got a commoner for a familiar. Granted he looked strong enough to beat a raven in combat, but she wished that she had summoned something cool! Like a griffon or a manticore!

"Watch your words little girl. I will never agree to become your pet."

"LITTLE GIRL? I'M 15 YEARS OLD! BE GRATEFUL A NOBLE LIKE ME WOULD TAKE A FILTHY cmmhrmrkg!"

Colbert stepped behind Louise and put his hand around her mouth, muffling her shouts. He was bitten though. It hurt like a bitch! He looked at Louise, then at the dog... yeah that explains it.

Colbert spoke loud enough for Kratos and Louise to hear him.

"Miss Louise! You are not helping with the situation at hand! Take responsibility for your actions and apologize to Kratos. You are not morally exempt for the inconvenience you caused him. As a noble, you should know that with great power comes great responsibility!"

In another universe, Uncle Ben sneezed. The snot that shot out of his nose blinded the gunman and caused the bullet to miss, saving Ben's life. Villians took over the world. Boo.


"But Mr. Colbert!"

"No buts young lady!" Then Colbert quickly whispered to Louise. "I'm on your side. Just keep quiet while I convince him to go with the ritual. Do as I say."

Louise swallowed her pride for this. Her face was still twisted with anger. It was red, and a vein could clearly be seen pulsing on her head. Why should she apologize to this stupid commoner that should be glad to be her familiar?

"I..am..ssss... orr...rrry. That you are an idi...err.. went through that portal. It won't happen again."

Nobody was fooled. That apology was insincere.

For the sake of moving shit along... "Apology accepted. Now, about your promise Mr. Colbert?"

"I will fulfill it. Before we head inside for the evening, I wish for Ms. Valliere to complete the familiar contract with you."

Kratos's voice took an edge.

"My will is my own."

Colbert anticipated this. "I know. My intent is not to insult you. I wish for the contract to be completed purely for its symbolism, and its roots in holy tradition. It is a celebration of the history upon the founding of our great nations. It is a blessing of two new lives conjoined. It is done in springtime because spring is the season of new life, and renewal. I know that you and Miss Valliere got off to a rocky start, which is why I'd like her to make amends after completing the ritual. She could do what I originally planned for Siesta to help you with. She will show you around the academy, to the dining hall, and help you find lodging."

An eloquent speech. Too bad for Jean and Louise, Kratos already saw through their lies. Kratos observed the submissive characteristics of other familiars... Being cynical did not always hurt either.

"Do not test my patience sorcerer. I know of your foul plan. You'll regret making me your enemy."

Gee Kratos, subtle much? Kratos was pissed. Sometimes fighting words come out when he is angry.


Peaceful persuasion did not work. New plans hatched in Jean's slightly boozed, sleep deprived brain.

1. Call off the familiar binding plan. Let the man go.

2. Let Siesta show Kratos around rather than Louise. At night, use headmaster Osmond's magical artifact, "the bell of sleep". Kratos will not wake up as Louise completes the ritual. Probably the safest way.

or

3. Levitate the cocky bastard and tell Louise to complete the ritual as he dangles in mid-air. The quickest and most dangerous way.

4. Reason with him why defeat would be inevitable for Kratos. He should accept the contract for the sake of life. The nobility quashes rebellious commoners. Unless he wanted to end up tortured in a dungeon for a crime he may or may not have committed. Perhaps "belligerently assaulting nobles with deadly weapons". Once he receives the familiar branding, he probably could not care less how cruel or unstable his master was. He would love her all the same. Colbert would omit that last part of course.


The plan was... number 3!

"Louise. Complete the ritual."

Kratos was lifted into the air and dangled upside down, revealing what was under the loincloth. The women blushed at the sight. Colbert felt a bit jealous.

Kratos's arms were pinned to his sides, courtesy of Professor Colbert's magic. What surprised Colbert was that he needed to substitute his cantrip with line class wind magic in order to budge Kratos. Was Kratos even resisting? The implications of this left a sinking feeling in his stomach. Was telling Louise to complete the ritual a big mistake? No turning back now. He felt that Kratos would try to kill them all if he was set down. Maybe he would anyway whether it happened or not.

Louise stepped, then crouched down to the face of Kratos. She was mad for all that he did. She even apologized to a familiar! Absurd!

"Not so uppity now, are you peasant? For making me go through all that trouble to bind you, you shall have no food for a week!"

Colbert marveled at Louise's harshness. 'That girl has a death wish. The familiar contract forms an immediate bond of servitude, growing stronger as time passes, but even a bound familiar will go berserk if pushed too far.'


A crowd of students had gathered. They made inane remarks about what was taking place.

"Hey look! It seems that Zero is about to bind a transvestite peasant in the summoning circle!"

"What makes you think he's transvestite? He looks masculine to me."

"He's wearing a skirt, makeup, and golden jewelry on his arm! Women of the far east like to use that powder to look pale and unblemished! Nobody's skin is like that! Even albinos!"

"That's a loincloth. As for his skin, I do not know. High ranking military officers sometimes wear golden jewelry as symbol of their status. He looks ripped. Maybe he is not what you guess that he is."

"Think he was paid to do this?"

"Judging by the fact that he's being hung upside down, I'd say no. Ha! Louise can't even get a transvestite to be her familiar!"

"So you agree!"

"I'm just humoring you. He could be a fashion model. Life would be way better for him if he did not need to serve the zero."

"What about the big, shiny, gold knives on his back?"

"He also receives royalties from an established knife company. Duh."

"You sure about that? He's probably a gigolo. Look how he's dressed! The chains are for kinky customers, and the knives are for cutting people who do not pay."


Kratos heard enough.

"YOU DARE MOCK THE GOD OF WAR?!" The shout was loud. It was intimidating, for the people who believed what they heard was "God of War."

"You see Malicorne, he even has a hooker name. God of Whore. It sounds exotic and unique, like Like Candy or Cristal."

The students who had decent hearing, and half a brain pissed themselves. At least they were smart enough to know when a strong maniac was enraged. The familiars of the children ran off to hide while making frightened noises.

Montmorency in a refreshing display of wit, demonstrated why her nickname used to be "The Flood."

"SILENCE FAMILIAR! I NEED TO CONCENTRATE!" Louise was given a look of pure hatred from Kratos, if her eyes had been open, she would have regressed to childhood memories of hiding in the boat in the lake near her house. That and her sister Cattleya hugging her in the boat.

"Pentagon of the five.."

Kratos did not wait for Louise to finish. Breaking free, he twisted right side up and swatted Louise aside as though she were a fly. Louise lay on the other side of the yard, knocked out. Kratos charged at Colbert.

"YOU WILL PAY FOR YOUR DECEPTION COLBERT!"

Colbert retried the wind binding, but to no avail. He was beginning to think Kratos used a counter spell. That, or he had godly strength. No. That can't be possible! He's but a mere human, a human mage!

The message flashed over and over in Colbert's mind 'CANNOT BE SLOWED!'

There wasn't enough time to bring out the flame snake. He was about to get dunked.

Luckily, one of his students helped him.

Tabitha froze Montmorency's urine that lay on the grass, causing Kratos to lose his footing as he sprinted over it. Tabitha pulled the Professor onto Sylphid. They flew up and away.

Kratos was having none of that cowardice. He pulled out Typhon's Bane and shot several volleys, quick as the wind.

Tabitha's dragon is classified by many to be a wind dragon. This was just a name given for the dragon's amazing flight speed and maneuverability. It was unable to withstand the rapid shots from the bow carved out of a wind titan.

"KWEEEH! EHHIE KYUII! (translated: OWIE OUCHIES!)

They crashed onto the ground. Bones were broken, but everyone was miraculously alive. Kirche sat up. She cast fireballs at the spartan. He grabbed them out of the air using the golden fleece, and threw them right back.

"Ack!" Kirche quickly stripped off her flaming clothing. Tabitha helped put out the fires.

My lacy push-up! It's ruined!

Kirche was topless, and in her undies. The perverts in the yard died from blood lost through their noses. Others got cut up by Kratos, so they lost their blood in awesome, but painful looking deaths.


Ms. Loungeville looked down at the carnage, and smiled. She wanted to do what Kratos was doing to the noble brats, but she had an image to keep, of being a harmless secretary to the headmaster.

"Headmaster, the sleep bell is ready."

"About time! We must stop this violent rampage before it's too late! I already have 2 days worth of letter writing. I hate writing to families I met, but do not know well. Nobody shows up for parent-teacher nights! Plus I'd rather spend that time with you, and my beloved Mótsognir." The mouse familiar came back to Osmond's palm. It relayed the news of the color and type of panties Ms. Loungeville was wearing.

"But anyway. Time to put that jerk to sleep."


Montmorency, Tabitha, Kirche, and Colbert hid in a barrel as Kratos rampaged around the courtyard, laughing menacingly and shouting threats to make noble children do less than noble things to their underwear. Those who mocked him were feeling the full force of his revenge.

They saw a small field appear around Kratos. One that they recognized as a sleep spell.

Kratos would rather not sleep. He was a god! Well...technically, he lost his god powers, but he now had titan powers. Close enough.

"I'll take a power nap."

1/20 of a second later

"Most refreshing sleep I had in months!"

Kratos walked out the sleep field looking years younger.


0_0

"We need a plan."

"Gank with all 5 of us. Elixir up."

"Are you insane? This guy is fed! We need 2 whole raid groups!"

"Louise", Tabitha said.

"What? Zero?"

"Explosion. Bad guy go boom."

"Well they are powerful, what if he catches one?"

"..."

"Just hope he doesn't. Got it."


Louise was splashed with water.

She woke up. Not with the nonsensical "~Munya~" and stretch. That's when she wakes up feeling properly rested.

She woke up with a "graahhh! Cold!"

Kirche smiled at the midget.

"Wakey wakey! Now control your monstrous familiar. I believe you won the bet Louise. So...save us please?"

Louise gagged, then puked at the vileness invading her senses.

Most of the courtyard was covered in fecal matter. It seemed that both familiars and masters alike had problems dealing with stress when it came to Kratos. That and entrails.

A few corpses were cut into bits, there were decapitations, students missing legs or arms; a plethora of boo boos.

"Let's get this over with."


Normally, Louise would object to striking a man while his back was turned, unless he lacked morals, which somewhat applied to Kratos. She also believed her classmates when they said not to worry about him. He had already beaten 3 teachers. Louise gulped.

Kratos stood triumphant among the carnage. He slaughtered snotty noble children (strange that many had not reached puberty with the age he pinned them at) and it felt good!

"I'M THE BEST! AROUND! NOTHING'S EVER GONNA KEEP ME DOWN!"

He reveled in his glory. Basking in the blood and guts as if it were good sex. Who can make your sons die? Sprinkled with those he slew? The Kratos man. The Kratos man can.

Louise took aim. She was putting everything she had into it, though it would be a bit weaker considering her headache. This monster needs to be wiped out. It was her fault, so she would fix it.

BOOOM!

Once the smoke cleared, she saw Kratos standing there, proud and tall.

'Heh. Looks like I failed. Once a zero, always a zero.'

Louise fainted.

To be continued?


AN:

Another chapter done. Lots of references in this one. I'll not mention them just yet. Have fun guessing!

Reviews would be appreciated. What you liked, hated, made you think of another thing, et cetera.