Chapter 4

After the last mission, things were settled for the team. Jaz had apologized to Top, for what, I'm not sure, I couldn't quite hear over the ambient noise (McG!). Preach seemed to see something in the conversation and I started to watch more closely our sniper and Commander. I didn't know for what I was looking, but if Preach had noticed something, I wanted to be aware of it too.

Soon enough though, the familiar beep-beep-beep rang out. SHE was calling to take my team away, again. This time they were off to Mexico to plant a bug on an elusive arms dealer. I counted 5 out: 1-Top, 2-Amir, 3-Jaz, 4-McG, 5-Preach. I said a quick word to whomever might be listening to keep them safe and allow me to count 5 back in.

I was determined not to worry on this mission. I'm not a newcomer, I have seen many, many missions during my time with Top, this one didn't sound terribly difficult, for them. I resigned myself to the idea that they would be gone for several days. I knew they were going to Mexico and I assumed that Preach would try to wrangle a visit to SoCal. It's possible Top might go along with it since it let's him fly more. He loves being the pilot but doesn't often get the opportunity. I knew he would relish his time in the seat, grinning like a kid at Christmas. Jaz will be beside him and McG will be in the back. Preach and Amir will find seats in the middle. Even in a small plane they have their preferred places. I waited patiently for them to return, ready to welcome them home.

I heard their vehicle pull up and counted: 1-Amir, 2-Preach, 3- McG, 4 -Jaz, 5- Top. I searched their faces for anything of note. This mission was an obvious success. Something else was there. A hint of justice served was written on their faces. I can't quite figure out what it is for, they were just going to plant a bug. Never mind that, it looks to be a good evening around here.

It is early in the evening when they return and before long they have gathered outside. Top has taken control of the grill, McG and Amir are playing horseshoes. McG seems to be trying to convince Amir that they knew he would be fine, they really were joking that he was going to get smoked. Amir didn't mind the joke but it was something to which he was not accustomed. He tucked away this information for later.

Jaz sits at the picnic table, beer in hand, hair braided and looking at the men around her. She smiles as McG starts the trash talk with Amir. Preach is finishing his customary post mission call so she moves on quickly with her eyes. She glances at Top, smoke curling around him at the grill. She lets her gaze settle on him for a moment. Her mind is flooded with the memory of standing at the helicopter. That feeling rushed back with it, but she couldn't put her finger on exactly what it was. She continued to process the replay in her mind when the fear of leaving him behind surfaced. The fear reached her eyes for a split second. Of course, that was the exact time that Top caught her gaze. His eyes widened and he raised a brow. She broke from her memory to see his brow quirked in question at her "are you okay?" he asked silently. She answered with a calm smile and the wordless conversation was over. She was not sure what that even was, she certainly wasn't ready to discuss it with him.

Not feeling safe to continue looking at Top, lest he pry further, she moved on to Amir.

Amir was still such a mystery. On this mission, he stayed at the compound risking it all for the team. She knew now, despite her words to him in Ukraine, he really was a team player. But something, something was holding her back from admitting to herself that he was wholly part of this team.

Amir tossed a horseshoe and it clanged loudly as it hit the stake. He smiled as McG jokingly whined about his skill. The smile didn't quite reach his eyes, but as she gazed over him, his relaxed shoulders told her he was more relaxed and open than before. That was something.

For all her reservations about him, Jaz longed to get to know the man better. She couldn't decide (wouldn't admit to herself) that she truly wanted to know him. For today, she convinced herself that she just wanted to feel like the team was complete again.

As Amir continued his game with McG, he was acutely aware of the sniper seemingly setting overwatch on him from the picnic table. He quieted himself to try and assess whether he was a target, or she was watching out for him. In the field, he had no concerns. This team was a team of the highest caliber and they carried themselves with integrity (tough skills for their jobs) and always had each other's backs. But here, at home, he couldn't tell her intention.

He wanted to get to know the sniper better, to really know Jaz, not just the tough exterior she allows everyone to see. He loved her fiery nature and knew that she had paid dearly to be here. She is so good at her job, he can't imagine her doing anything else, but he wonders what first drove the beautiful young lady to sniper school.

As that thought passed through his mind, he saw her shift slightly in her seat. He exhaled realizing she wasn't targeting him but looking at him rather inquisitively. He chuckled quietly to himself. They were good at their brief covers for missions and they could school their features during a mission, but they would not hold a long-term cover well. He tried, unsuccessfully, to catch her gaze. He knew she was purposely avoiding the contact. She ALWAYS knew when she was being watched. He decided to let it go but still offered her a smile. He knew she saw it, even though she didn't react. For today, that would be enough. A quick invitation to ask some of the questions she had. He hoped she would soon. She was the final piece of this puzzle for him with this team and he was really beginning to love being on this team. He just needed Jaz onboard with him completing the team.

Preach took the long route from leaning on my metal side to pass by each team member, giving them his silent survey. (He was just looking for someone on whom to drop a Preachism). He stopped at the grill and cocked his head at Top. "Top, this was a successful mission, what's going on in there?"

Top smirked to himself, "Dammit Preach, I don't even know how can you see it?", but aloud he said "Just thinking." Preach looked the younger man over and knew that he would get no more from him….for now. He nodded at Top and moved on to Jaz.

He strolled up to her "Hey Jaz, everything ok?"

"Of course, successful mission, easy trip back…" she trailed off wondering why Preach was inquiring.

"You were over here alone and it looked like you were processing something is all." Preach answered without her even asking.

Jaz knew she had been caught, but couldn't share this yet, she didn't even know what it was. Preach let her off the hook again. "You know, we never did talk about you and the helicopter." Jaz froze, he couldn't possibly know what happened, right? "You were closing the door from the outside before Top and I got there." She breathed a sigh of relief, this was going to be a regular chastisement, not a discussion of feelings. "We don't leave anyone behind." Jaz set her jaw in defiance as the words came out.

"Jaz," Preach started and stopped. He knew to let this go (for now). "You're right, we don't and we all would have done the same thing. Just remember, you can't disobey orders, none of us can." She half-smiled and nodded "I know, won't happen again". Preach stood and smiled down on her, "Yes it will". With that he turned to join Amir and McG.

He had noticed Amir trying to size Jaz up while he was on his call. One look at Amir and Preach knew the man was working out his own plan, so Preach didn't need to intervene (yet). He joined McG and Amir at the pit and looked over McG.

McG looked to be, well, McG. He was a brilliant medic, solid shot, great team member, and by all outward appearances, possibly the most solid member of the team. He didn't wear the weight of his duties outwardly and until he opened up with them all a little more about it, Preach would keep a close eye on their medic, his friend.

It had been McG that had given the slight nod to Top that finalized the plan to go back and save Sofia. Of the whole team, McG was the one whose humanity was most intact. Preach would protect that as much as possible for as long as possible. He found nothing in McG that warranted extra attention today so he grabbed some water and joined the trash talking.

After an enjoyable and relaxing evening, the team had retired to their quarters. Well, everyone except Top. He was sitting at the kitchen table mindlessly spinning his coffee mug around on the table. His eyes were pointed at his desk, but he was not looking at it. (Something's gotten into Top tonight, it's not the mission, it's not the team, they didn't have any "incidents" like in Ukraine…) I couldn't put my finger on it.

Top muttered something about Vargez, love, Sophia, but his voiced stopped. Top looked far away again as he pondered something that Vargez had said about love. Suddenly, he stopped spinning the mug and panic flashed in his eyes for a second. He shook his head with a firm "No" to himself. I couldn't discern what happened in his head, but I knew that it wasn't finished with him yet.

Top rose to rinse out his mug. He looked over the room and found everything settled for the night. A yawn escaped and he knew it was time to sleep. He turned the lights out in the kitchen and started down the hall of their quarters.

Preach's door – all is well. The room is quiet and dark and his friend was fine today. He quickly moved on as the exhaustion started to really pour over him.

McG's door – he smiled as he heard the snores emanating from the room. He was thankful for McG on the mission. When Hannah had called with the news about Sofia, he knew that he wanted to jump into action. But he needed the team to buy in. With a subtle nod from McG, he had known the plan was good. He was glad that this was one of the rare missions that McG hadn't needed to use his medical skills.

Amir's door— the room was dark and quiet and Amir had not given Top any cause for concern during or after the mission. In fact, Amir had been key in helping them save Sofia. "You're perfect for this team" Top said quietly to himself and he moved on to the next door.

Jaz's door – he was glad to find this room also dark and quiet. He had been relieved that they could put the Conner mission behind them, but the helicopter lurked in his mind. Still, Jaz had been superb on this mission, being the eyes in the sky for the failed drop, impersonating a salon employee and getting the intel they needed, and using her ninja skills to place the bag of money in Urzua room. Spectacular, he thought to himself. Suddenly, the words of Vargez came back to him and mixed with thoughts of Jaz. Top closed his eyes shook his head firmly to rid himself of the thoughts "I really need to get some sleep". He stood there a minute longer, eyes closed to clear his mind. He didn't hear her open the door.

Jaz was laying in her bed not sleeping, trying to sort out that feeling that came up with the memory of the helicopter. She just wanted to get it resolved and move on. She knew Top wasn't angry anymore and Preach, well Preach just worried about them all too much. Frustrated, she decided to get a drink of water. A lap around the hut would calm her down and she could get to sleep. She was wrapped up in her own thoughts and didn't perform her customary listening to her surroundings. Knowing the guys were all asleep she employed her ninja skills to head to the kitchen. She quietly opened the door and saw Top standing there with his eyes closed. "Vargez, Sofia, Jaz" he muttered to himself. As he opened his eyes, blue met brown and there was plenty of panic all around.

"Top?" Jaz inquired. "Did you need something?"

"No, I was just making sure the place was buttoned up before I go to bed." Top hoped Jaz would just let this go, he wasn't entirely sure what he had been saying when she opened the door.

"Well, I was just going to get some water." Top stepped aside so she could pass. She paused and thought about asking. Nope, she thought silently, I have this other thing already keeping me awake.

They nodded to each other and when their eyes met again, they silently promised to never speak of this again. Top went to his rack and fell asleep quickly as the exhaustion really had set in. Jaz drank her water and made her lap. She considered Top at her door but honored their promise and went back to bed.

These two, dancing around each other all the time. I paused, THAT's what Preach had noticed. Ugh, now I wish I could TALK to Preach about it, maybe help them figure things out. I don't presume to even know what that means for them, but I do know this, they can't keep dancing around each other. That may prove dangerous.

I listen briefly, Jaz is asleep now and the guys are all resting well. Good night, Team. I'm glad you are back. Rest now, I have the watch.