Chapter Four
I lay in my bed, butterflies in my stomach thinking about what Annie said earlier today in my room. I can't even remember the last time I've had butterflies over a girl. A girl. That's what Annie is. Not a woman, but a girl. A sweet innocent girl. How can I pull her into this? It's not right. But if she wins, there will be no choice, that's exactly what will happen if I'm there or not. Because while yes she is a girl, she is a very beautiful girl. Damn beauty.
I think about Johanna and how she never did what the Capitol asked of her, what if Annie is the same? From what she said before about her family, I doubt they would approve of the things the Capitol would want her to do. I doubt they'd approve of me. I shake my head of these thoughts, this isn't about me right now, this is about her, this is about Annie.
I fall asleep focusing on strategies that in the end, Annie won't have to kill anyone. I can't think of a single way that this is possible. I fall asleep depressed.
[i]The sun is setting and I'm all alone. I'm sitting on a hill, the sun is glimmering in the water beneath me. I'm extremely thirsty, can't even remember the last time I was this thirsty, my mouth feels like sandpaper. I walk down to the water and scoop some water into my hands, as soon as I bring it to my lips it transforms into worms. I quickly shake them off of me and spit onto the ground, I stand up and back away from the pond that is now full of worms.
I find a squishy patch of grass and lay down, I'm now exhausted as well, and still ridiculously thirsty. Where is everyone? Suddenly as I'm looking up at the stars faces begin to appear in the sky. I know where I am now, I remember this all clearly. This is my arena.
I quickly stand up and look around for my trident, it's nowhere to be found. I begin to walk quietly but quickly to the woods and through them until I can find some sort of weapon to defend myself. Nothing. All I see are trees and grass everywhere. Not even a bird in site or any form of living creature.
What day is this in the games? I can't remember. Who is dead? Is it almost over? Is this the end?
I finally give up and collapse next to a tree, too tired and thirsty to carry on. So what if I die? Is my life even anything worth fighting for right now? Wait... This can't be the arena, this is just-
A frightening scream cuts through my thoughts and before I realize what I'm doing, I'm running. I'm running as fast as I can towards the scream. Somehow I know who it is and I know what I have to do. I'm now running through the woods with a trident in my hand when I see Annie silently hanging in a net in a tree with an axe through her head. Blood is pouring out of her skull and her face is distorted. I look over to see Johanna Mason standing there laughing an evil laugh holding the axe in her head. I don't even think, my trident is through Johanna, and she falls to the ground still laughing and pulling the axe out of Annie as she falls and dies. I find a knife in my pocket and quickly cut Annie down from the tree. Her eyes are wide open and horrified. She can't be dead, not so doon. I begin to shake her and scream her name, over and over. She has to wake up, she has to!
"Finnick!" I hear Annie's name calling my name. She's alive, I knew it, I knew she couldn't die. "Finnick!" She screams my name again. but why are her eyes still closed? Why isn't her mouth moving?
[/i]
"Finnick!"
I wake up to Annie hovering over me with her hands on my shoulders. I'm breathing heavily and she looks a bit scared.
"Are you okay Finnick?" She asks me with a concerned expression.
"I'm fine," I say, sitting up slowly. My head is pounding.
"You didn't sound fine," Annie responds looking at me as though she's inspecting me.
"What do you mean?" Now I'm really confused.
"Well, honestly I wasn't eavesdropping or stalking or anything, but I was going to get a glass of water when I heard my name. I thought you had heard me and wanted me to come in for something. I walked to the door and heard my name again, so I just walked in." Her face is turning red now, I'm pretty sure mine is too "I'm sorry but I honestly didn't know you were asleep, I was going to leave when I realized it but your voice got even more intense. You were basically yelling my name and I couldn't just leave you like that. I don't know what you were dreaming about but I knew it wasn't good and it needed to end. It took me a good thirty seconds to even shake you awake, you were fighting it."
"Thank you," I say and I stand up shakily and walk to the bathroom to splash some cold water on my face.
"Let me go get you a glass of water," Annie heads out of my room and I walk back over to my bed. I lay back down in bed and look down at my chest, glistening in sweat. This is when I realize I'm only wearing boxers. I quickly put a sheet over my lower half before Annie comes back.
My eyes are closed but I hear my bedroom door open and close as Annie comes back in. I open my eyes and see her carrying two glasses of ice water over to my bed. I slowly sit up and Annie hands me one glass. It nearly falls out of my hand as I take it, I'm shaking so bad. Annie see's this and puts her hand around mine to steady it as I bring the glass to my mouth and take a small sip. I sigh, it's so refreshing.
I sink back into my pillow and close my eyes. I'm even more exhausted now then I had been before I had fallen asleep the first time. I didn't even notice Annie had left my side until I feel a cold cloth on my forehead and I feel Annie's hands on my face.
"Some dream you had," Annie says and I feel her lay down beside me. "How are you feeling?"
I open my eyes slowly and realize she has turned out the bathroom light so it takes a minute for me to make out her face in the darkness.
"I'm alright," I manage to get out and she strokes my cheek. I feel my body quiver under her touch, I see a slight smile on her lips.
"What happened?" She asks with a strained voice.
I take a deep breath and swallow to get the lump out of my throat, "You died."
Annie lays her head on my chest and after a moment of silence I hear her whisper "It was just a dream."
The morning comes too quickly as I hear a knock on my bedroom door. I feel an arm around me and instantly tense up. I look down to see Annie still asleep on my chest.
"Finnick! Are you alright? Can I come in?" I hear Mags hand on the doorknob.
"I'm not dressed right now Mags! I'll be down for breakfast in a second!" I yell at the door as I'm climbing out of bed.
I see the door open and Mags walks in "Oh please, it's not that big of a deal my dear," She stops as she see's me climbing out of bed and Annie's head poking out of the covers, eyes wide staring at Mags. "Miss Cresta please go to your room immediately and get ready for training."
Annie nods and stumbles out of bed and rushes out the door. Mags slams it shut behind her and glares at me.
"What?" I say sitting back down on my bed.
"Excuse me?" She asks me in a very stern tone. She sounds like my mother used to.
"You told me yourself that I should do what I think is right, these are her last few days," I quote her and she scowls.
"I meant to be nice, friendly, maybe even a bit romantic, but not to sleep with the girl!" Mags is pacing my room looking furious.
"We didn't have sex Mags," I say firmly and she stops.
"You didn't?" She asks, looking at me as if she's trying to see if I'm lying. I stand up and walk over to her, putting my hands on her shoulders.
"She heard me screaming in my sleep, she came in to check on me, she got me a glass of water and I fell asleep, I guess she just fell asleep with me, I honestly don't even remember her being there last night," I tell her honestly.
"I believe you," Mags sighs. "This doesn't look good though Finnick, if President Snow finds out-"
"I can take care of myself Mags," I say walking over to my drawers to find some fresh clothes to put on for the day. "It's her I'm worried about. And if she needs some comfort late at night, you bet I'll be there." Mags nods.
"Just be careful Finnick, you know I love you like a son," Mags squeezes my shoulder and walks to the door.
"And I love you like a mother," I reply and I see a small smile form on her lips as she heads out the door.
It's so sad with Mags. I can always tell she wanted a family, but due to the games and the Capitol, she never got that family I'm sure she always dreamed of. When I started going to her for advice, her eyes would light up. When I started asking if I could come over for dinner or to spend some time with her, the smile on her face was the most sincere thing I have ever seen in my life. I would do anything for Mags to just have the life she always dreamed of, she deserves it more than anyone.
I sit down next to Mags at the table, everyone but Annie is already here. I'm served an omelet and fresh fruit and I begin to dig in. I didn't realize how hungry I was until I took the first bite.
Annie walks in with her training jacket on and sits down next to Chip and across from me. She smiles shyly at me and tries not to make eye contact with Mags. I smile reassuringly back and nudge Mags to do the same. We really don't need an awkward and nervous tribute on our hands.
"How did everyone sleep last night?" Milstra asks cheerfully. Mags, Annie, and I look at each-other and let out a soft laugh. "Did I miss something?" Milstra asks a bit frustrated.
"When do you not?" Mags responds and Milstra scowls at her, Mags just smiles broadly. I look at Chip and he looks a bit confused but not quite bothered by it as he chows down on some eggs and steak.
I look over at Annie's plate and see she has only fruit on it.
"Excuse me," I call to one of the avox's "She needs protein, not just fruit." They nod and quickly head back into the kitchen. "I swear they're trying to kill you."
"I'll be fine," Annie tells me and I meet her eyes. She's talking about last night, about my dream. I had completely forgotten about that until now.
"I sure hope so," I respond and look down at my plate.
"Thanks for the support on this side of things," Chip says with a full mouth of eggs.
"The only reason I know she'll be fine is because she will be with you Chip," I tell him and I see a smirk on his face. He knows how I feel about Annie, but I know he wants to know we're rooting for him too, which we are. If I lose Annie, I still want Chip to come back alive. Unless he's the one that kills her, then I'd rather he be dead as well. If he comes back after he kills her, I might be the one to kill him. I shake my head to get these thoughts out of my mind and begin to eat again.
"Well I think it's time for you two to head downstairs to training," Milstra says, she's picking up on some tension and she doesn't like it.
"Where are we supposed to go?" Annie asks.
"I'll take you," I say and Annie smiles at me.
"No you will not Mr. Odair," Milstra buts in "It is not that complicated Miss. Cresta, all you have to do is go to the bottom level of this building. The elevator is right over there," Milstra points towards the elevator "I trust you know how to press a button."
Annie nods and stands up slowly, Chip follows as they quietly head to the elevator. Before the elevator door closes I can faintly hear Chip ask "What was that all about?" and then they are gone.
"Thank you for telling me how to mentor my own tributes Milstra," I bark at her and slam my fists down on the table. "You need to stay out of this, I am not your property."
"I think President Snow would say differently," Milstra says in a cocky tone.
"You know, maybe someone would actually find you attractive if you weren't such a coying bitch," I'm now standing and yelling in her face "but I'm sure that will never happen. I may be forced to sleep with you, but trust me when I say, I'll never feel a damn thing for you." Milstra's lips are pursed and before she has a chance to respond I storm off to the elevator and head downstairs.
I sit in the lobby of the training center sipping on some coffee, waiting for Mags to come and yell at me for how I've been acting.
"That was very dangerous Finnick," Mags sits down next to me with her own paper cup of coffee. "If Snow finds out, this could be a disaster for you Finnick."
"She deserved it."
Mags smiles "I never said she didn't"
"What should I do?" I ask Mags.
"Pretend it never happened," She replies "That's all you can do."
"I'm falling apart Mags," I put my head in my hands and try to hide the tears that are forming in my eyes.
"One day, somehow, you will be put back together," Mags says.
"How long will that be?" I ask her, not wanting the answer.
"It takes ten times as long to put yourself back together as it does to fall apart" Mags answers wisely. I'll remember that.
Mags and I sit quietly sipping our coffee and glancing at each-other on occasion when suddenly the seat to my left is now taken as well.
"Rough night?" Johanna asks and Mags and I nod. "Me too."
"What's wrong with you dear?" Mags asks kindly.
"My tributes are pretty much already dead," Johanna says bitterly "Between what the stylists did to them and how weak and inexperienced with anything they are, they're fucked."
"Language dear," Mags scolds, I let out a light laugh. Mags may not seem it, but she has a dirty mouth on occasion, she gives me a look.
"Sorry," Johanna murmurs.
"You can't always save them," Mags tells Johanna.
"But you damn well have to try," I respond and Mags looks at me sadly.
"What happened last night?" Johanna asks curiously.
"I'll leave you be, I need to go and straighten some things out with Milstra," Mags rolls her eyes and heads to the elevator.
"Milstra?" Johanna asks me.
"Oh, she's just our districts escort, and I'm just her escort," She looks appalled at this. "You see, I told her off this morning, and she didn't take it very well."
"Well good for you," Johanna says.
"Until I'm punished for it," I respond bitterly. "I blame you actually."
"Really now?" Johanna laughs "How is this my fault?"
"I was pretty worked up over a dream last night, and you were in it," I see a smile on her face "Don't flatter yourself, you killed my tribute, so I killed you."
"Ouch," Johanna says, still with a smile on her face "Annie is it?" I nod "I'm sorry I killed the girl of your dreams last night and made you kill me." I let out a small laugh and she does as well. A real genuine laugh, it's good to hear.
"Odair!" I hear a deep voice from behind me and I turn around.
"Chaff!" I stand up to greet my tall, dark-skinned friend from 11.
"Not only have you not come to find me yet, you still haven't introduced me to this beautiful lady!" Chaff winks at Johanna.
"That's not coffee in there is it?" I ask Chaff and he grins.
"Some people need something a bit different to wake them up, now this pretty young lady," He nods towards Johanna.
I roll my eyes at him "Chaff, this is Johanna Mason, Johanna, this is Chaff, he won the 45th Hunger Games, he's from district 11," I say introducing them and Johanna reaches forward to shake his hand when she stops and her eyes grow wide as she realizes she's shaking his arm. Chaff and I laugh at her expression.
"Nice to meet you Miss. Mason, I'll see you around Odair," Chaff walks over to another table to visit with Haymitch.
"What happened to his hand?" Johanna asks as soon as he's out of ear shot.
"The games of course, he refused to let the Capitol fix it though, that's just how he is," I sit back down with Johanna. "He seems a bit like you actually."
"I'm not a drunk," Johanna responds.
"Not yet," I respond "You already said you're taking advantage of the open bar, I'd stay as far away as possible if you can. That's how it all started for both of them," I say nodding towards Chaff and Haymitch. "From what Mags told me, the first few years they seemed fine, but after they watched tribute after tribute die that they mentored, they would start excessively drinking during the games, and eventually it turned into their whole lives. I've just stayed away from it completely, I could never let myself become that."
"Thanks," Johanna says to me, I'm confused now.
"For what?"
"For being my mentor outside of the games," Johanna smiles at me and I smile back "I'd offer you help with Annie, but I'm not quite the romantic type."
"Really? I never would have guessed." She lets out a breathy laugh and so do I. It just feels so good to laugh. Talking to Johanna is fun. I can't remember the last time I talked to someone around my own age for more than a few seconds, I've missed it.
I make sure to keep the training sessions with Annie professional at night. We sit on opposite sides of a table and I show her pictures of plants and she must state what they are and if they are safe or poisonous. By the 2nd day of training, she knows all of the plants by heart and I'm sure she won't kill herself by poison. I run over all of the best ways to find water, and then I begin teaching her how to tie knots. I nearly give up on teaching her how to tie knots as she is absolutely terrible at it, but she keeps insisting that I continue to help her with this.
Finally by the final night of my training with her, she ties a perfect knot, and another, and another. I watch as she works carefully on the living room floor, creating a net, so perfect, nobody could get out of it alone. I smile as I watch her and she looks up and catches me staring.
"Is it good?" She asks smiling.
"It's brilliant. This is what you need to show the gamemakers."
"But I don't have enough time to make this in front of them!"
"Just do your best," I rub her shoulders "Now go to bed, you have a big day ahead of you."
Annie stands up and walks over to me "Thank you Finnick," she wraps her arms around my shoulders and I wrap mine tightly around her waist. She's so small, so fragile. "I never would of had a chance without your help, you may have saved me, I hope you have," with that she kisses me gently on the lips and heads to her room.
I hope I've saved her. I really hope so.
A/N: Fair warning, the next chapter is going to be a bit… juicy.
