Warning: Contains the usage of mild swear words and scenes of a honeymoon nature.

Summary: The Doctor and Donna have accidentally married, made a home visit to tell Sylvia and Wilf, and promised a wedding ceremony. This is sort of a response to Travellers' Tales Prompt #10 – 'obvious' at doctor_donna.

Disclaimer: The BBC owns Doctor Who; always have, and probably always will.

A/N: This was written at the request of the lovely sczep84 and bacon_fiend.


Chapter 4 - Of Marriage and Men

"Donna!" complained the voice on the other end of the phone, "when are you coming home for the wedding party?" Donna held the offending phone away from her ear to give it a chance to dry from the sweat that had built up there.

"Mum! Will you stop worrying! Isn't it obvious? If the Doctor said we will come home and have a wedding of some sort, then we will! I just don't know exactly when!" she tried not to glare at the phone, but her mother's change of heart towards the Doctor was spooking her out!

She successfully ended the conversation and went to seek out the Doctor. He was examining a large tomb in the library. "Ah, there you are!" he greeted her. Donna felt she could never get enough of his greeting kisses, especially when they started to slip further into 'more than welcome' country. "How did the phonecall go?" he asked eventually, when he thought to.

"Mum wants to know when we'll fix this wedding thing to happen," she stammered out, caught unawares by the lack of kissage. "What were you doing?"

"I think I was kissing you, but I might have been mistaken," he drily quipped.

"You prawn!" she swotted his arm playfully. She didn't want to damage the goods after all! "I meant the book?"

"Oh that! Looking up Atreen customs and ceremonies to see if we…," he hesitantly began.

"If we…?" prompted Donna. "Come on, what are you worried about?"

He took hold of her shoulders and looked her straight in the eyes, "There is a small possibility that we might not be legally married."

"What?" Donna shrieked. "But I've got the ring and everything! Don't do this to me!"

"It seems we have a second level marriage but not a third level marriage," he stated.

"And what the hell does that mean?" she demanded. He tried to console her by rubbing patterns on her skin.

"I don't know yet. I have to read my way through all this," he gestured towards the book.

"But surely a marriage is a marriage, no matter what the level?" she anxiously looked at him. A grin began to spread across his features. "You'd better not be joshing with me!" she threatened.

"No, it isn't that!" he tried to appease her. "It's just… well… I never thought I'd have to comfort you about being married to me, that you'd want to be married to me!"

Donna blushed. "I never said I wanted…"

"Oh yes you did!" the Doctor beamed. He wrapped his arms back round her, hugging her tightly, "I think you rather like all this marriage business now." He kissed her, "Admittedly you took a little persuading…" he caressed her body, "but we seem to…," he nibbled at her ear, "have come to an agreement."

His warm breath was playing havoc with her willpower. "How about you double check then about the legality of what you're doing," she mumbled, though she had intended to deliver that order with more strength.

"Oh I'm sure what I'm doing to you is perfectly legal, no matter where we are," he worked his way down to her neck, and Donna could see things were heading south.

"I didn't mean like that, Timeboy! I meant marriage-wise." She ran her hands through his hair, glorifying in its softness.

"I thought that's what you meant," he chuckled. "Do you really want me to stop what I'm doing, only it could spoil the moment." He flashed her a cheeky grin from near her cleavage.

"Hmm, tempting! You know, I'm not that worried right now! Shall we resume play, or do we need to keep the covers on?" she giggled. "Was it a good innings, or were you bowled out for a duck?"

"No, we're breaking for tea I thought," he snickered. He took hold of her top, "And I definitely don't think we need to keep the covers on! What's that expression your granddad uses? Oh yes! Let the dog see the rabbit!"

"I don't know how to take that! Rabbit indeed. I could sue you for deformation of character!" she began to make quick work of his buttons. "Makes me sound all…"

"Shaggable?" he offered. "With your little rabbit nose, and your snuggableness." He attempted to undo her trousers, and her impatience got the better of her.

"Just…!" she took charge of the operation. "Now what were you saying?"

"No idea!" he admitted. "Something to do with a duck was it?" he pulled her down onto a sofa. "Oi! That isn't cricket, is it?" he exclaimed as she batted his hands away from her bra clasp.

"I should bloody well hope not!" she smirked at him. "What's the hurry? Been giving out more appointments again?"

"I keep everything for you, you know that! Now let me give you a thorough examination. Trust me, I'm a doctor!" he made for the clasp again, this time succeeding.

"You'd better be bloody good then!" she attached herself to his neck.

"Oh, I think I can safely say that I get good results," he claimed as he captured her lips again and continued his…erm... examination.

After they had exchanged tissue samples, they snuggled together and considered the marriage question again. "Do you think we ought to do the whole ceremony for Mum, or should we do some pseudo stuff instead?" Donna pondered.

"Like what exactly?" he asked.

"Like one of those naturist things." Seeing his stricken expression, she adjusted that reply, "I mean nature-loving not nudist! God forbid! Can you imagine standing starkers in front of a bunch of strangers? How embarrassing!"

"Sorry, I'm having trouble getting beyond you being starkers! What was the rest of that?" he teased. He snuggled closer into her, "Waving about willow branches seems a bit bizarre, but if that's what you want…"

"It could be beautiful," Donna argued.

"Or it could be bug-ridden," he pointed out. "You don't need all that really, do you? We need something simple that announces we're married."

"How about a karaoke?" she suggested. But his groan answered that one. "Oh, I don't know! It's all so complicated when you've already done the deed. And I don't mean that deed, Sir Smirkalot!"

"I've no idea what you mean!" he tried out his innocent look. "What exactly was your mum hoping for?"

"A church blessing, I suppose; virtually a proper wedding," she admitted. "Do we want that?"

"I don't know. You tell me! Do you want the whole white meringue experience? Or something more subtle?" he quizzed her.

"You're going to kill me for this, but I rather fancy the meringue. I know, I know, I said I didn't, but that was to please you. Are you annoyed with me?" she looked at him hesitantly.

"No, not really," he kissed her tenderly. "Whatever you want you can have, as long as we don't have to do it naked. The church bit I mean; we can save the nakedness for our alone time, can't we?"

She hugged him gleefully, "Thank you, thank you thank you! Mum will be ecstatic! I bloody love you!"

"Careful, I may make you prove that!" he turned them on the sofa, and got his proof.


Sylvia fussed around Donna. "Now, have you got your borrowed?" Donna lifted up the borrowed shoes. "Your new?" Donna showed her the new crucifix at her throat. "And your blue?"

"Mum, I am not flashing you my knickers! Just take my word for it when I tell you I'm wearing them!" Donna glared, before softening her expression, "Thanks, Mum, for everything!"

Sylvia kissed the seated Donna on the head, "You're welcome. Did the best man turn up after all?"

"I think so. The traffic from Cardiff was diabolical apparently," Donna sighed. "You do like him, don't you Mum?"

"What? The best man? I haven't met him yet!" Sylvia replied.

"No silly! I mean the Doctor. He's not all bad, is he?" she asked.

Sylvia gently patted Donna on the cheek, "No, not all bad. I've grown quite fond of him, but don't tell him that!" They shared a smile. "Are you ready?"

"As I'll ever be!" Donna stood and looked in her full length mirror, "Blimey! I wash up well!"

"You look beautiful!" Sylvia wiped a tear from her eye. "He's a very lucky man."

"That's one way to describe him," Donna scoffed. "'Loop' would be another, or madder than a box of frogs."

Wilf appeared in the bedroom doorway, "Oh my gawd! You look…" He welled up and pulled Donna into a hug. "Not many men are good enough for my gal. Good luck," he whispered.

"Thanks Gramps," she pulled out of the embrace. "Let's get this show on the road, eh?"

She lifted up her long skirt and made her way down the stairs, out the front door, waved to the assembled neighbours, tried gracefully to get in the hired car, and rode towards the church.


It was weird to turn up to the same church as before. It wasn't much to look at from the outside; seen one church seen them all! But the inside was gorgeous. Sylvia and her elves and weaved their magic, making sure there were blooms everywhere, tied up with fancy bows. It was a sight to behold. It also made the Doctor feel quite queasy with the overkill, but he thought it best to keep that thought to himself. Things had gone reasonably well up to that point; Jack had arrived in time, suited and booted, and teasing him terribly about wedding nights, much to his embarrassment. He wished Donna were there to sort him out. The thought of Donna doing so later on made him feel much better, and Jack look at him questioningly as he chuckled. "Are you okay?" Jack asked in a low voice.

"I'm alright. I'm always alright," the Doctor couldn't resist stating; but the irony was lost on Jack, and it made him pang for Donna again. "How long she going to be?"

"Shouldn't be long now," Jack consoled him, "I think I see…" The Wedding March immediately began, causing them both to exchange happy grins.

Donna had described the dress to him, but the Doctor couldn't wait to see how it looked on her. He gasped as he caught his first glimpse. They'd decided against having any bridesmaids, so it was just Donna and a proud Wilf walking down the aisle towards him. She was radiant! His fingers itched to caress her skin, and her usual fragrance hit him with the subtle addition of something else.

She swept up next to him and he had to resist the urge to kiss her immediately; they'd had an extensive discussion about what behaviour would be acceptable in front of the congregation and what wouldn't be, fortunately he had a good memory because the list had been quite long. Before he realised it the vicar had begun his speech, "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to bless this union…" The rest of it he zoned out during. Of course he listened enough to give the correct replies to the oaths, but his attention was on Donna, what he'd like to do to/with Donna, and what he could possibly get away with.

Donna had caught his expression and knew he was slightly away with the fairies; but she understood that all of this wasn't for his benefit, and loved him for making the effort. She also liked the gleam in his eyes as he stood gazing at her, as if she were the only woman in creation. Yes, she could learn to love that look quite a lot. She gave a delighted shiver as she wondered what he had planned for later. Oh yes, there was the look she really loved: the naughty one. She gave her required response, and the vicar finished with a flourish, "I now pronounce them still husband and wife!"

The Doctor saw his chance to grab her into a kiss, and made the most of it, luxuriating in the taste of her lips. "Save some for later!" Jack whispered into his ear, making the people nearby laugh, but the Doctor chose to ignore him. It was his wedding-blessing thing, and he was going to enjoy it! Luckily Donna had pre-planned things enough to be wearing a non-smudgeable lipstick; otherwise they'd both be wearing lipstick as a foundation.

The vicar patiently waited for them to finish before announcing to the congregation, "I give you the not quite new Doctor and Donna Noble!" to which everyone clapped heartedly, even Nerys. The Doctor escorted Donna towards the church doors where the photographer was already taking several pictures.

All the posing outside the church was a bit of a bind for the Doctor, but he was on his best behaviour, and was extremely attentive towards Donna. Sylvia could not have been happier as she watched the proceedings. And Wilf stood as pleased as punch in his photos. It all went rather well. Finally, the photographer had done his job, and people started to head back towards Sylvia's house.

"Are you ready to meet and greet up-close Mrs Noble?" the Doctor asked Donna.

"Before we go any further, Spaceman, can I just say one thing?" Donna looked at him pensively.

"Of course you can. What is it?" he was worried by her tone.

"I feel sick!" Donna declared, and she ran to the nearest available bush to vomit behind it.

"Oh. My. God! Isn't it obvious? She's pregnant!" Sylvia squealed loudly.

.