A/N: Right. That's it. I don't want to spoil the entire story for those who actually take time to read and appreciate it. You can speculate all you want, assume all you want, but I'm not saying any more. If you don't like it, don't read it. No one's pointing a gun to your head and forcing you to read this.
And to everyone who actually reads and appreciates this, thank you! The updates are much slower now because I've started school three week ago. I only had less than a week of summer break (we usually have an entire month) because I took summer classes so I could get them out of the way and not take them on a regular semester. Anyway, three weeks in and it's already taking a toll on me, physically and emotionally. Yes, the story is ALMOST finished and saved on my computer, most chapters are done, but I barely have time to eat or sleep, more so being on the internet. I barely use my laptop unless it's school related. Besides, if I post everything all at once, where's the fun in that? Lol. Anyway, thanks again for being so patient, and for reading. xx
Leonor laughed probably louder than she's ever had in her life. She and Emily went to dinner and now they're back at Emily's apartment for wine and some crappy reality TV. But really, they only liked watching it because they could roast the people on it.
Ever since they've spend time together the first time 3 weeks ago, it has been followed by two more Saturday outings. It just became an unspoken rule that if Emily was in town, they'd spend Saturdays together.
"Hey, this wine is amazing, by the way." Leonor said, praising Emily's knowledge for wine. She actually envied her in that sense.
"Why, thank you. It takes years of practice. And by that I meant I actually started drinking at the age of 16, secretly of course." She said smugly.
"You know, your life could actually turn into a great book. The Misadventures of Emily Prentiss." Leonor teased.
"I will seriously consider that when I get sick of the FBI." Emily laughed.
"Which is never." Leonor said plainly, to which Emily agreed.
They sat in comfortable silence as they drink their wine and watch TV. Once the show was done, Leonor got up and took something from her bag.
"I brought something." She said, walking back to couch and sitting beside Emily. "This is umm… a collection of photos from my childhood. I've put it in here because I was really hoping I could someday show it to my real mother." She explained quietly.
"Oh." Emily whispered. "I would love to see it." She smiled at the younger woman.
Leonor moved closer to Emily. She opened the album with one half sitting on her lap, while the other part of it was on top of Emily's. "There's not much in it because films were too expensive for us – the old camera was a hand-me-down from a neighbor, but my mom made sure she had the camera for special occasions and milestones."
She pointed to a baby photo of her sitting on the bed with a little book in her hand. The handwriting on the bottom of the photo says "Leonor, 10 months."
"Oh, you're so cute." Emily cooed.
"My mom said I started talking and walking at 10 months. I barely even crawled, said I just got straight to walking. She said that's when she knew that I would be special. So she continued to read books to me that she got from the library."
Emily pointed to a photo of a tiny little girl – maybe around 2 years old - sitting on the floor with a pile of books. "I'm guessing that's you in a library." She said.
"Yup. That was the day she brought me to the library for the first time. I was reading by that age, and the librarian actually gave my mom a weird look because she took me to the world history section and gave me history books to read. I guess that librarian was expecting me to bore myself out in the kids section."
"You like History?" Emily asked.
"I love it. I love reading and learning all about it. It's like there's a movie playing inside my head when I read about History. I also like stories which has historical setting, especially the war era. "
Emily smiled in awe. She loved History and maybe… just maybe Leonor got that from her.
"Look at this." Leonor pointed on a photo of a little sitting on a huge couch reading a book. "Can you tell which book I was reading?"
Emily took a closer look at the photo and chuckled. "The Little Prince… In French?" She gave Leonor a surprised look.
"Mhmm. I was 4 at that time and that was the foreign novel I read."
"Wait, how did you learn to speak French?" Emily wondered.
"Our old neighbor, Mrs. Maggio, she lived alone. So, from the time I was two, I would come by her house in the morning and then again in the afternoon, and she would just teach me a lot of things. Math, Science, Politics, Geography, everything. She was fluent in French, so that became a constant lesson for me. She said I picked up the language very quickly. So by the time I was 4, I was speaking French fluently. I learned the English language from reading at the library. Mother and father only knew Italian."
To say that she was surprised was an understatement. Leonor was a gifted child, and god only knows what opportunities she would've had, had she stayed with her. Maybe Elizabeth would like her better than Emily.
"I remember that day very well. It was a day that opened a lot of doors for me. You see, as I was reading there, this old man came and sat beside. He watched me, probably wondering if a little girl could even understand the words on that book. So he asked in French, do you even know what you're reading? And he laughed. I turned to face him. I was so annoyed, not only because he was mocking me, but also because he interrupted my reading. So I replied in French, of course, I do. There's a lot of things I know that a normal foolish old man like you do not know. And that's how I got a scholarship to one of the most prestigious schools in Italy."
"What?" Emily chuckled.
"Turns out that old man was the headmaster of the school. He talked to the librarian, who told him all about me. Then, one day he talked to my mother at the library and said that there is a full scholarship for me. His wife has this Foundation which helps poor kids get to school. Each scholar has a sponsor, and mine was the first lady of Italy at the time. The wife actually lobbied for me to get a good sponsor. In turn, I would win academic competitions for them." She explained.
She then turned the page which had a lot photos of her from grades 1 through 12. In every photo, Leonor was holding a trophy (or trophies) and medals were hanging from her neck. "I enjoyed those competitions. It was a like a fire was building inside of me just waiting to explode. The adrenaline it gave was insane."
God, she really is my daughter. "You amaze me, you know?" Emily said to her.
"I do?"
"Of course. I bet every person you've met was impressed by you."
Leonor smiled, but it also faltered. "Every person but my father." She whispered.
"Oh Lee, you don't have to." She said, reaching for the younger woman's hand.
Lee. Emily started calling her that upon their second Saturday outing. Emily has this habit of shortening people's names if it's two syllables or more. Leonor was not an exception. She didn't mind though. She even silently decided that only Emily can call her that.
Leonor just nodded, knowing that Emily would not push her to talk about her father if she's not ready yet. So, the night went on with them taking a look at pictures Leonor brought.
"I'm sorry I don't have a lot of pictures to show you." Emily said. Leonor put in a lot of effort to save the pictures and put it together in that album She could feel how happy Leonor was while telling stories about each of them. She was slightly embarrassed that she didn't have anything to show her.
But – wait. She does have one photo. One that she's been saving all her life. One of her treasures. The only memory she had then of her baby.
"Stay here. I have something to show you." Emily said before getting up from the couch and heading straight to her room. Once there, she pulled out a box from her closet, a box where she kept things which have a sentimental value to her. She pulled out one photo that she was suddenly excited to show Leonor. But before she could close the box, another thing caught her attention. And finally she remembered. She also pulled it out of the box and held it close to her.
She's never felt so connected to her daughter up until now, so she decided it was time. She came back downstairs and sat beside Leonor again.
"Here." She handed Leonor an ultrasound photo.
"Oh." Leonor whispered, and suddenly, she couldn't help the tears starting to pool on her eyes.
"That's basically the only picture I have of you. The day I told Matthew that I was pregnant, he brought me to a doctor because he wanted to make sure that everything was alright. He even paid for it from his allowance. That was the only doctor visit I had during that pregnancy, and part of the reason why that, years later, I truly believed that my child was dead – because I wasn't careful. I didn't take care of myself, and I didn't take care of you.
For years, she thought I was dead and blamed herself? Leonor thought. "But you didn't have a choice. They locked you in. The least that they could was have some doctor visit you in that place!" Leonor said, slightly agitated. This woman beside basically went through torture just so she could live and she's blaming herself? If there's anyone to blame here, it's her mother.
Leonor was crying now as she faced her real mother. "It's not your fault." She said, taking Emily's hand in hers. "I'm sorry that you went through all of that. You have no idea how thankful I am that you fought for me to live, because what you've done is the greatest act of love anyone could ever imagine. And I can only wish that I could be half as brave and half as strong as you."
Emily was speechless. What else was she supposed to say? At a loss for words, she pulled Leonor in for a tight hug and whispered, "Thank you. You have no idea how much that means to me."
"Oh, I have one more thing!" Emily exclaimed when they pulled away, wiping the tears from their eyes and smiling at each other.
"This." She showed Leonor the gray and white knitted baby blanket.
"You made this?" Leonor asked, feeling the soft material.
Emily nodded. "Summers in Spain can be boring for a kid. So my nanny, who was desperate to keep me in one place and not running off somewhere else, taught me how to knit. It took a lot of tears and frustrations, but eventually I got good at it. I've always had a knitting kit since then."
"When I was locked in that room, I begged Amalia to bring me my knitting kit which was in my original room. Even though she knew she'd get in trouble, she still did, under the pretense of bringing me dinner. She's a very clever woman, by the way. When I was not crying or sulking in that room, I would knit – trying to make something special for my child. And this was the outcome. I'm pretty sure I also made a hat and a pair of boots but I never found them."
"That's okay. This is amazing." Leonor chuckled. "Is there anything you can't do?" She teased.
"Well, I can't do sports." Emily said plainly.
Leonor laughed. "That's okay. Me too."
They got lost in deep conversation and before they knew it, it was past midnight.
"I should go. It's late." Leonor said, standing from the couch.
"You can stay here, you know." Emily offered nervously. "I have a guest room. You can borrow some clothes."
"Oh no, it's okay. I don't want to bother you." Leonor said.
"Please." Emily reached out for her hand. "After what happened, I'm really not comfortable sending you out alone at this hour."
To be honest, Leonor was also scared of going home at this hour ever since the incident, so she wasn't sure why her first response was to turn down the offer. But now, looking into the older woman's eyes, she could see the fear in them, like Emily was having the same thoughts and fears as hers.
So she nodded at Emily and smiled shyly. "Okay."
/
"Here are some clothes for you to sleep in." Emily said, setting the clothes on the bed of the guest room. Leonor was looking at one of photos on the shelf. "Bathroom is down the hall. I'll set down some towels and a toothbrush for you."
Leonor smiled gladly. "Thank you."
"This your team?" She asked, handing the photo frame to Emily.
They both sat on the edge of the bed, looking at the photo. That one was taken on Dave's birthday in his garden. She remembered how Morgan tried several times to set the timer on the camera just right. Garcia sent them all a copy and she loved it and thought that it deserved to be framed and displayed.
"Yeah." She nodded, and proceeded to point at every person on the photo. "This one here is Jennifer Jareau, she is our media liaison. This one next to her is Dr. Spencer Reid, he's not a medical doctor but he has a PhD in basically everything you could get a PhD on. That one is SSA Derek Morgan. Standing next to him is our vibrant and bubbly technical analyst Penelope Garcia. This one is SSA David Rossi. That's me next to him, and then next to me is our Unit Chief SSA Aaron Hotchner."
"I remember him. He was at the hospital with you, right?"
Emily nodded. "That's right."
"Don't get mad but I actually thought you guys were married or something."
"What?!" Emily laughed nervously. "Why would you think that?"
"I don't know, you just kind of like give out that married couple vibe." Leonor shrugged.
"Well, we're just friends. Honestly, he's one of my closest friends."
"Do you not like him?" When Leonor didn't get an answer, she looked at Emily, studying her face. Then she gave out an exaggerated gasp. "Oh my god! You like him, don't you?" She teased the older woman.
Emily opened her mouth then closed it in an attempt to find an explanation. "Nope." That was all she had.
"You totally do." Leonor said decisively.
"Alright, you've had too much wine for tonight. Time for bed."
"Oh. There it is. The first stage – denial."
"The wine made you so woozy, honey. Time to get some sleep." Emily said, standing up from the bed to put the picture frame back on the shelf. She could hear Leonor giggling and she could swear it was the best sound she's ever heard.
Emily came back a little while later to give Leonor another blanket – only because she thought the other one was stiff and scratchy, though Leonor thought otherwise - and an extra pillow. "Hey, thought you might need these." She said, placing the items on the bed.
"Oh. Thank you. And I really had an amazing time today, so thank you."
Emily just nodded at Leonor. "Good night, Lee."
To her surprise, Leonor reached out and hugged her. "Good night." She whispered.
/
Emily was lying down in her bed, unable to sleep. She could feel how tired her body was, but somehow she was just not able to sleep. She debated calling him. Maybe telling him about her day would help get some of the adrenalin out of her. But it was late and it would be rude of her to do so if he was already asleep. In the end, however, her stubbornness won and the next thing she knew, she was waiting for him to answer on the other line.
"Hey." The husky voice in the other line greeted.
"Hi." Emily said shyly. "I hope I didn't wake you."
"You didn't. I was working on some files."
"Aaron Hotchner, it's Saturday night."
"Well, what else was I supposed to do? Jack is asleep."
"Yeah. Yeah." Emily giggled.
"So, what's up? How was your day with Leonor?"
Emily suddenly smiled. It really is nice to have someone ask how your day has been. It's a sign that at least one person cares enough to listen to you. "Great. Amazing. Emotional."
"Wow. That's… a lot."
"Yeah. But honestly, we had a great time. She's actually sleeping in the guest room right now. We lost track of time and I didn't wanna send her out alone this late, considering what happened last time."
"Right. That's a wise idea, and I'm glad she agreed. I guess she's not as stubborn as you."
"Oh shut up." They both laughed. "But, you know what – okay, I'm probably just imagining things- but, when it was time for her to go, I saw some fear and hesitation in her."
"It's called mother's instinct, Em." He said softly.
"Oh. I don't know-" But he cut her off.
"Emily, stop it. It's late and your daughter is just about to go out all alone. You saw her fear and hesitation, and it's most probably trauma from what happened to her, and you just reacted like how any parent should. That was Emily, the mother, not Agent Prentiss, the profiler."
Emily was silent for a little while, just letting the words sink in. Her mother. "Thank you, Aaron." She whispered.
"Now, shouldn't you be sleeping too?" He playfully scolded her.
"I am in bed and about to go to sleep, but I was just so excited to tell you about my day that I couldn't wait 'til tomorrow."
But before she could hear his response, Emily heard a blood-curling scream coming from the other room.
"Shit." She got up quickly and ran to the guest room. "Call you back!"
"Em, what's-" But the call ended before he could ask.
Emily busted through the door, not even thinking about knocking. She then saw Leonor sat up on her bed, crying.
"Lee! What's wrong? What happened?" She sat beside her daughter, trying to comfort her.
Leonor tried to wipe her tears, embarrassed about the whole situation. "I'm sorry." She whispered.
"It's okay, honey. Did you have a nightmare?" Emily asked, and Leonor could only nod. "Oh Lee. Come here." She pulled the younger woman in her arms. "It's okay. You're okay."
Leonor tried her hardest to calm down immediately. But of course, it was easier to do it when someone is comforting you, like what Emily's doing right now. It reminded her of Amalia. As a child (and yes, even as an adult, but she would not admit that just yet), Leonor believed that every mother had a magic touch. They just make everything better. That's what she's been longing for since Amalia had passed – a mother's touch.
Emily held the crying woman tightly in her arms, gently rocking back and forth, trying to soothe her. "Do you want to talk about it? Talking helps, you know." She offered gently.
Leonor didn't nod nor shake her head. So Emily waited, and after a while, Leonor finally talked. "It's always the same dream." She whispered. "I was back in that dark room, all tied up. The man enters and starts beating me up. But I blink once and the man would suddenly turn into my father. He beats me repeatedly using his favorite rod that he likes beating me up with. It hurt then, and it still hurts now, even in my dreams. It felt so real." Leonor cried.
Emily pulled Leonor's shaking body tighter in her arms. The younger woman was clinging to her, her hands fisting her shirt like she's holding on for dear life. "Shhh. It's okay. It's okay, baby, you can cry it out. But you have nothing to be afraid of, honey. They can't hurt you anymore, especially now that you have me. I won't let anyone hurt you ever again. I promise you that." She placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.
Leonor cried for a good while and Emily let her. She knew that letting out all the pent up emotions could really help, and hopefully will make Leonor feel a little lighter. Leonor only pulled back when she felt the painful throb in her head.
"My head hurts." She said so softly that Emily couldn't have heard her if she wasn't listening so intently.
She was immediately filled with concern. Maybe Leonor worked herself up too much that she got sick. "I'm going to get you-"
"No. Uhm. I have medicine in my bag."
"Oh. Alright." Emily stood up to retrieve the bag and hand it to Leonor. "Here. I'm going to get you some water, okay?" Leonor nodded.
Emily came back with a glass of water and a bottle of essential oil. "Here." She hand Leonor the glass, which the young woman gladly took.
"Thank you." She whispered, after taking her medicine, silently praying that it takes effect in mere seconds. The pain in her head was getting worse.
Emily put the glass down on the nightstand, and scooted up on the bed, with her back resting on the headboard. "Come here, sweetie. Lie down."
Leonor obliged and lied down beside her mother. "What's that?" She asked when she felt Emily's hand massaging her head.
"It's peppermint oil." She said gently. "It helps with the headache. Usually, I put it on a cotton ball and smell it, but for the bad ones, I like massaging it on my head. It will feel a little cold and minty, but it will help, okay?"
Leonor did not even argue. She liked the smell of peppermint, it soothed her. But what's helping her the most was being here with Emily. Truly, nothing could ever beat a mother's touch. The medicine was making her drowsy but she was fighting hard to stay awake, wanting more time with her mother.
"Go to sleep, Lee. Don't fight it." Emily whispered as she continued to massage her head.
"Can you stay with me? Please?" She heard Leonor ask. Her eyes closing, giving in to sleep. But she could definitely hear the vulnerability in her voice and she wanted nothing else but to hold her daughter and make her feel better. Emily had to wonder how many nightmare-filled nights Leonor had to endure all alone since the ordeal.
"Of course, sweetie. I'll stay with you." Emily lied down beside her daughter, continuing her soothing massage on Leonor's head. "Go to sleep, sweetheart. Everything's okay. You're okay."
Emily has never felt like this – so maternal. The rest of team has said that she always had been, that she had that maternal instinct that was so natural to her and that's why she gets to interview kid victims or witnesses. But she has never believed them – not until now.
