A/N: So, as I had promised, after ten reviews from you wonderful readers I would post the next chapter, so here it is! Do you think we can make it to twelve this time? If we do, I'll post it straight after the 12th review... if not, I'll post it as soon as I've updated my others, seeing as this one has been getting all the attention as of late!

Before I start, big thanks to foolishangel87, CraftyTink529, Christina89, xXParieceXx, nikki1335, Starkittie, Cena-holic8, xDarexToxDream, and WalkingAllOver for reviewing the previous chapter, you're all fantastic.

Here comes number four... don't forget to leave me lots and lots of feedback.


Chapter 4 – All I Can See

After our morning English class when Jesse had asked me out on a date, Randy had been extremely distant with me. During lunch, he suddenly remembered that he had something important to do, and after classes finally finished in the afternoon, he didn't come back to my room to hang out like we would usually do. He told me that he had a lot of homework, and without barely speaking another word, he left me alone.

I couldn't understand what his problem was. Obviously it was something to do with my date – but why? Was he really that uncaring, that he didn't want his best friend to be happy? Was I not allowed to have fun, too?

By the time I arrived back at my own room, I was fuming. I had convinced myself that the only reason he was treating me like this was because he wanted to be the one that had all the fun.

There was no way that was going to happen. Deep down inside, I was not looking forward to my date with Jesse – I knew the only reason I'd agreed in the first place was to piss Randy off – but that didn't change the fact that even if I was going to hate every single minute of tonight, I wasn't going to admit it to anyone, especially my so called best friend. He, of all people, would be told that I absolutely loved my date with Jesse. Every single second of it.

It took me hours to pick out the perfect outfit, and it was only when Maria returned and allowed me to borrow some of her clothes that I found the right one. For once, I was happy that I'd been roomed with a popular, fashionable girl. She sure knew how to dress.

Time passed quickly as I thought over the rough day that I had already had. As 7pm loomed, I began to regret everything which I had thought earlier. I had been blind with rage towards Randy, I hadn't even begun to think of any other reason as to why he didn't want me to go on this date with Jesse – but now, as I felt the dread growing in my stomach about the night which lay ahead of me – I realised that perhaps I should have been more considerate. Maybe... the reason Randy had said those things was because he was trying to protect me.

Of course, I didn't allow my imagination to get away with me. It wouldn't be because he felt anything for me physically, there was no way in hell that he would find me attractive... but he could have been protecting me because he cared for me as his friend. His best friend.

I began to wonder whether I should call Jesse and tell him that I was too sick to go out. It'd be easier that way – much easier. I could ask Randy what exactly was bothering him about this whole situation, and if it was just some stupid superstition, I could rearrange the date for a later time.

But as I picked up the phone, ready to dial my date's number, a knock echoed throughout the dorm. I heard a squeal leave Maria's lips as I looked up at the clock, not believing how quickly the time had flown by. It was five minutes to seven – damn Jesse for being too good to be a few minutes late.

Before I knew it, my feet had picked me up from where I was sitting on the bed, and walked me over to the door. I sighed heavily to myself, realising that it was too late to do anything about it now.

As I opened up the door to notice a very well dressed Jesse on the opposite side, all my bad thoughts seemed to fade away. Why should I dread spending a night with my friend? Even if he thought of it as something more, that still didn't mean I couldn't have a good time. The only thing that seemed to bother me right now was the fact that his eyes were searching me. I suddenly began to feel very conscious of the tight black skinny jeans and the leopard print top which showed a little too much cleavage. It seemed Jesse was conscious of it too.

"Ella, umm... wow," His eyes were wide as they finally reached my face.

It took me a few moments to get over what had just happened, but once I had, I couldn't help but let a grin grow across my features as I took in his dumbfounded expression. Same old Jesse. Tonight wasn't going to be as bad as I first thought.

"I know, right? I scrub up pretty well," I laughed as I waved goodbye to Maria and made my way out into the hallway.

"You think?" He replied, adding in a rather nervous chuckled himself.

I rolled my eyes at my friend, all of my unease suddenly gone. There was no need for him to be nervous about tonight, nothing remotely interesting, or scary, was going to happen.

"So, what do you have planned?" I smiled, linking my arm through his as we made our way down the hall.


I was happy to find out that all we were doing was going to a movie, and then following it with dinner. It was nothing extravagant, but it was nice. Simple.

Jesse allowed me to choose the film which we watched, although I think when he realised how much of a chick flick it was, he regretted it. He never complained about it though, which I liked. I knew that if it were a certain someone else I was with, I wouldn't hear the end of his complaints.

Afterwards, he took me to a rather flashy restaurant which he had picked out especially, and we ate. While doing so, we spoke of everything and anything, including our past. We giggled throughout most of it as we reminisced on ridiculous memories – this earned us glares from practically every other couple in the place – but we didn't really care. It was nice to be able to have such an easy conversation with Jesse, even though I knew he felt differently towards me than I did to him.

By the time we had finished dessert, it was getting pretty late, so we caught a taxi and made our way back to our college site. Like the perfect gentleman, Jesse walked me back to my dorm – but as we got closer and closer to my door, my stomach began to twist.

I knew that tonight had been great, but to Jesse, it had probably been a whole different type of great. I knew what he'd want before we separated – but would I be able to give it him? Did I really want to give this a go?

"So, umm, this is me," I smiled up at him as we finally reached my door, "I had a great time tonight, thanks, Jesse."

"So did I," Jesse nodded, although his expression seemed to be elsewhere, "Maybe we could do it again sometime?"

I knew that this sentence would be part of this conversation, so I was not surprised when he asked me this. Did I want to do this again sometime? I'd had a great night with Jesse, but I knew that if I told him I'd like to go out with him again, he'd want things to start getting serious. He'd want us to be in a relationship.

Part of me could not see the problem with this. Jesse was a smart, funny, sensitive, cute guy – who was perfect for me in so many ways – but the other part of me told me that he wasn't. There was only one guy who was perfect for me, even if he didn't want me...

But why should I turn down someone, when I knew I would never get the real man that I wanted? It sounded cruel as I spoke it over in my mind, but why couldn't I settle for second best?

"Sure, I'd love to, Jesse," I finally spoke up, once again smiling towards him.

"You, err, would?" He asked, his eyes slightly wide.

"Yes," I rolled my eyes, laughing lightly.

The smiled that lit up Jesse's face at that moment caught me by surprise. My heart might have belonged to someone else, but that still didn't stop me realising at that moment just how attractive Jesse really was.

"That's great, Ella. I'll let you know when, okay?"

"That sounds good," I nodded, slowly leaning towards the door handle and turning it.

"Alright, well... goodnight."

"Goodnight, Jesse."

As I spoke these words, he quickly lent towards me and placed a soft kiss on my cheek. With one last cute smile, he turned his back and walked back in the direction which we had only just come from. Touching the spot which he had just kissed, I sighed, but it was not with happiness – it was with confusion.

I finally opened up the door and walked into my room, feeling suddenly exhausted. I wanted nothing more than to fall down on my bed and to not wake up until my mind was clear of all these stupid thoughts. Why couldn't I just accept the fact that Randy was only ever going to be my best friend and move on?

"Have a nice time, did we?"

I squealed as a deep voice pierced the silence, and my eyes darted around the room until they landed on the figure which was slumped lazily on my bed. As my surprise subsided, my eyes narrowed into a glare. What the hell did he want?

"Yes, actually," I replied sharply, folding my arms across my chest awkwardly. I may have gotten used to the fact that I was basically showing off my bra in front of Jesse, but there was no way I was doing it in front of Randy, "Where's Maria?"

"With Taylor," He rose an eyebrow, his eyes searching me up and down before landing on my face, "And will you be going out with him again?"

"Excuse me? Since when has that had anything to do with you?" I asked, utterly dumbfounded at how he was speaking to me.

"Since I became your best friend, maybe?" He sighed, stretching his arms before he stood up and walked over to me, towering over me in all of his glory, "So, are you?"

I couldn't even breathe, never mind answer him as he stood looking down at me. I knew I should be mad at him, I knew that I shouldn't care what he thought, but how could I not when he looked at me like that? How was I ever going to say no to him? I loved him.

"I... yes," I finally added, barely above a whisper.

He seemed to let out a breath that he'd been holding in for some time, as if he were worried about my answer. How could he be? He ruffled his hair with his hand and I let out my own breath, but for a totally different reason. I hated how he tortured me like this. He stood here, inches away, in all his beauty, and expected me not to care about him. He expected us to be best friends, and only that. But that was never going to happen. Not for me.

"Ella, I don't want to be mad at you," He shook his head, his hands falling down to rest on my shoulders, sending fire coursing through my entire body, "But it's hard when I see you wasting yourself like this. You don't need a boyfriend, Ella – why do you need a guy when you're like you? You'd do so much better without someone holding you down," He paused for a breath, smiling lightly, "Don't you see that?"

I couldn't speak, couldn't move, couldn't even think as I processed his words. Why was he telling me this? He was so oblivious to what he did to me, how his words felt – especially one's as deep as these.

How was I ever going to be able to see Jesse again, when all I could see was Randy? I would never be able to settle for second best.

"Think about that, Ella."

He smiled lightly once more, rubbing my shoulder comfortingly as he did so. I defied against the shiver that was trying to consume me from his touch – I would not allow him to see the effect his touch had on me – not yet, anyway.

With a small nod, Randy finally let go of me, before slowly side stepping around me and leaving the room. I waited until I heard the door close before I walked over to my bed and fell in a pile onto it, my mind and body exhausted.

What was I going to do? Would I be able to do as I had thought earlier – would I be able to try and have a relationship with Jesse? Or would I take Randy's advice? I couldn't quite believe that he thought I was too good to have a boyfriend... but just the thought of it made me smile. That was until I realised he may have given me a compliment, but that not having a boyfriend included him, too.

Life was so much easier in nursery. What I'd do to go back to punching a boy to tell him I liked him.

With a small sigh, I crawled over and switched off my bed side lamp, leaving me in total darkness. I waited impatiently for unconsciousness to take hold of me, hoping that by the time I awoke I would have everything sorted out.