Chapter 3


Bruce waited for someone to exit the room, his self-restraint growing thin as seconds ticked by. Surely they didn't expect him to get dressed with them watching, did they?

Another minute passed by and he growled. Why were they still here?!

Closing his eyes, he tried to use every mental trick he knew. Gathered up every ounce of patience that was gained from raising two boys and dealing with sickos like The Joker on a weekly basis. He could do this. All he had to do was take a deep breath and--

"GET OUT!!"

There was really no reason to be afraid. Sure, Bruce was The Batman, but right now, he was just a naked human. But as they gazed into his eyes, and saw their possible deaths being reflected in those blue orbs...they quickly decided to obey, tripping over each other as they hurried out of the room.

J'onn made to stand up and leave also, only to be stopped as a hand grabbed his wrist. "Oh no, you're staying."

The martian stared down at his wrist, saying in a low voice, "I merely thought you would appreciate some privacy."

Bruce rolled his eyes before standing up and beginning the search for his clothes. "Why? You've seen it all."

Still, J'onn turned away while he got dressed, though he didn't really notice, as his headache was starting to increase. Probably from when he blew up at the other Leaguers. It was their own fault really, gaping down at him like fish...

But now that they were gone, the feeling like shit thing was starting to return, and he had to pause while pulling on his boots, as another wave of nausea passed over him. He hadn't felt this bad since he first started training, many years ago.

He never really noticed before but it seemed like the parts of his costumed tripled some time during the night, and the more he moved the more it hurt and by the time he was done there was a light coat of sweat covering his body.

Shakily he sat down and glared at the martian, who was turning around now that he was finally done dressing. "Do you at least feel half as shitty as I do right now, J'onn?" He spat, narrowing his eyes when the martian slowly shook his head.

"I feel well rested."

The only thing that stopped his hand from reaching into his utility belt, pulling out the matches, and shouting 'feel this asshole!', was the fact that he wasn't sure if he could do it without doing something very un-bat like.

Like crying.

And the martian had the nerve to ask him, "Is there something I can do to help, Batman?"

Batman stared at him for a minute, debating on whether or not to ask because while he wasn't sure he wanted to know ...he had to know. So he reluctantly turned his chair to the monitors and started going over last night's footage.

"You can explain to me how we went from this," He pointed to the instance when they were sitting side by side, before fast forwarding to where he was sniffing --sniffing-- J'onn's neck. "to that."

Silence. He turned around, and growled when he saw the martian was halfway through the floor. Another second and Batman was alone in the monitor room, with their --for all intent and purposes-- sex tape, playing in the background.

Should have used the damn matches.


C'eridyall stared at H'ronmeer, taking in all that he had told her had happened while she was away, her eyes blank.

No. He wouldn't be that stupid. There was no way he'd be so idiotic as to do something like that. This was one of his little tricks. She'd fall for it and then he'd cackle that insane cackle of his and say 'ahahaha, you're spending too much time with those humans if you're willing to believe that!'. Just like all the other times.

But as she took in his sheepish posture and the fact that he couldn't quite look her in the eye, she realized that yes he was that stupid. And it was with that thought, that she exploded, her normally peaceful nature tossed aside.

"ARE YOU COMPLETELY INSANE?!"

H'ronmeer huffed, crossing his arms as he glared down at her. "No. My plan was foolproof--"

"A fool trying to come up with a foolproof plan, imagine that!" C'eridyall shook her head, pacing back and forth as she wondered what the hell she was supposed to do now that H'ronmeer had messed everything up. "I was working on something! A nice human--"

He sneered. "A human? You think a human is good enough for our child??"

She fixed him with a cool look that sent a shiver down his spine, even though he was immortal. "At least my plan didn't put our child's life in danger."

His back stiffened. "At least my plan was getting something done. No matter how many humans you sent his way, he never took any interest in them. My plan worked." A disgusted sound. "Even if he did choose the one human that was on that little tower at the time."

C'eridyall sat down, shaking her head. Of course he'd only care about the human part. Never mind the fact that he'd almost killed J'onn or indirectly put a human's life in danger. No, he didn't care about any of that.

She sighed wearily. "When a martian is in Heat, anyone they have intercourse with will also be affected."

H'ronmeer let a smug smile play on his lips, gazing down upon the human planet. "I know. It was definitely the most excitement that human has ever had. I'm almost impressed that he was able to withstand it." Almost.

He blinked when she let out an angry shriek. For someone supposedly so peaceful, she sure did play the pissed card pretty well. "A martian can withstand Heat without any repercussions. Do you have any idea how it'll effect a human body?! What changes it might cause?!"

A blank stare was her only answer.


Flash glanced sideways towards where the Batman was sitting. The Bat was eating some crackers, and had a grimace of pain on his face, that appeared whenever he moved. He was obviously not in the mood for any company.

But...

He just couldn't get the image out of his head. Them. On the floor. Naked. It was just so...dude.

How in the hell did they get to that point? J'onn was green and while he had nothing against green, the last time he checked, Batman had like this huge prejudice thing going against aliens and not being able to trust them.

Such as Superman.

Though, now that he thought about it, he never really expressed the same extreme distrust towards J'onn that he showed Superman. Which, he knew irked the Big Blue Boy scout. And probably would even more so now that...

They had sex.

Sex.

When he had walked in, on that, he was shocked to see that everyone was staring. No one moved. Well, not until Bruce yelled at them to GET OUT and even then there was like a split second of hesitation.

And he understood, because of all the people to walk in on...

Batman and J'onn had been like the last two people he'd have ever imagined.

He had to know why. In fact, he was determined to find out as much as he possibly could, only he couldn't just look at the footage; there was only a .9 percent chance that Batman hadn't erased all evidence.

And he needed to know why. So he gathered his courage and proceeded to walk over towards the Dark Knight, stopping when he was ten feet away from him. He opened his mouth to ask the crucial question, only for Batman to interrupt him, saying in a deadpan voice, "I'll give you ten thousand dollars if you promise to drop the subject and never speak of it again."

He paused. Ten thousand dollars was a lot of money. He could get a better apartment. Buy a new fridge. Or some comics! Or that new CD...but...

Dude. It was...and...them...naked and...ten thousand dollars but...but...

"Hey Flash, you okay? You're...kinda...shaking there..." Green Lantern walked up beside him and was about to say something else, when he noticed Batman was there. He coughed slightly. "Uh...listen, Bats uh--"

"Ten thousand dollars."

GL's eyes widened. "Say what?"

Flash snorted. "Psh, Like GL's just gonna drop the subject just because you wave ten G's in front of him?"

Batman bit into another cracker, chewing for a few seconds, then nodded. "Okay. Twenty."

His eyes got even bigger. Twenty thousand dollars. And all he had to do was promise to never speak of it again? He could do that. After all, he wasn't even really that--

"PSH! NO WAY MAN! You can't BUY off GL!"

Green Lantern started to panic as he watched the Bat shrug and start to walk away. The hell he couldn't!

"HE'S JUST AS CURIOUS AS I AM ARENCHA GL?!"

He glared at the Flash, who quickly deflated. "Shaddup! Hey, Bats!"

'Bats' turned around, a slight smirk on his lips. And even though he knew he should feel ashamed... Green Lantern couldn't stop himself from saying, "Seventy."

"Done."

Immensely pleased with himself for earning more money in just one hour than he made in an entire year, John began pondering on what he was going to do with his hard-earned cash. Maybe a new car. Or a better apartment. Or...how much did boats cost?

The speedster pouted. " I can't believe you sold out man. I'd never sell out. My dignity is worth more than that."

A smug look. "I have seventy thousand dollars. What do have? Oh, right, your dignity. My dignity's worth seventy thousand. What's your's worth? Nothing. Can your dignity buy you a car? No. It can't. So I win."

Flash stared at him for a few seconds before blurting out, "Aren't you curious though?"

John smirked. "Very. I suppose I'll just have to wonder on what happened while I'm driving my new car around." He stretched his arms, a happy sigh escaping. Minus hell freezing over and all, today had been a pretty good day.


XD How'd you likes it?