His arm wraps around my waist, and I freeze. He pulls me in closer to him so our sides lock against each other's. He kisses my forehead and says "It's okay, you're mine now" and I've never felt so safe in my life.
The sun starts to set, ending the warm, summer evening. I'm sitting out on my porch, writing inside my moleskine notebook, about the past few months. About the whole Genevieve incident and the anonybitch video, how Peter Kavinky kissed me in our old treehouse, which is a gazebo now, and the first time we did "it". I click my pen so it contracts as I hear a familiar car engine roll by. I don't look up from my notebook, but I know who it is and smile. "Covey!" He calls, "Wanna come for a ride?"and I really want to, but I know I'm supposed to bake cupcakes later tonight for Kitty's bake sale tomorrow, and besides, it's a Sunday evening, we both have school the next day. "Let me ask my dad!" I call back and I quickly enter my house, calling for daddy. "Daddy! Is it okay if I went for a drive with Peter for a bit?" I wait impatiently for a response until he says "Sure, don't worry about baking the cupcakes, Kitty and I will figure it out!" And I'm happy I can go, but I feel guilty for making daddy and Kitty bake the cupcakes on their own. But then I resolute. I'm ALWAYS the one to bake the cupcakes, Kitty only ever comes to decorate and ice them. I slide my flip flops back on my feet and run back outside, leaving my moleskine book inside the house. "I can only stay for a bit" I say, as I enter his black Audi, which feels more like a second home to me since I've been in it so much. Soon were taking off onto the road. "That's not a problem, where do you wanna go?" He asks. "I could take us to get some dessert or we can go take a nice on the beach" he suggests. I want to do them both. I glance at the clock on his dashboard, "7:49" I don't think daddy'll mind if I'm out for a teensy bit longer. "Can we do both?" I ask pleadingly. "You sure you're dad isn't going to mind?" Peter asks. It's sweet how concerned he is about me. No matter how minor the situation is. "Yea, he shouldn't be upset, he said I could go out, and as long as I'm home by midnight, I'll be good." I say, reassuring him a bit. "Alright then, how about we go to get a funnel cake? We can go to the sweet shack near the beach" he says. He knows I love funnel cakes, a couple months ago, he took Kitty and me to the county fair, and that's the first time I've ever had one. I love how the ice cream melts on top of the warm dough, and the strawberry sauce is even better. Since then, we've been looking all over town to find places that sell funnel cakes, and Peter's found lots. "Mm, funnel cakes. That sounds great" I say, delighted "Can we take it down to the beach and eat it there?" I ask. "Whatever you want Covey, whatever you want" he says grinning as he glances at me.
I watch as our funnel cake gets prepared behind the counter. Mmm.
We pay and head out, finding a nice, calm spot on the beach. I find a nice spot that's not too sandy, so we can sit and is away from the shore, so waves don't soak us. Funnel cakes remind me so much about happy things, but I don't know why I'm bringing up something sad.
"Peter, do you still have feelings for Gen?" I ask, forking a generous amount of funnel cake and ice cream. He doesn't answer right away. "Lara Jean, you know I don't like her in that kind of way, she's just a friend, and besides, you know her big secret now" he says, feeling sorry for me. I think that Peter thinks I was over the entire Genevieve thing, but when I started writing today, memories flowed right back into my brain. "I know, but I get anxious you know? I don't want to be your number two, Peter, I want to be your number one." I can't help but look at him sadly, and I haven't looked at him like this since we had our last serious talk about Gen and him. "You are my number one, Covey, and even if your not the only girl I've dated, you sure are my favourite I can tell you that" His arm wraps around my waist, and I freeze. He pulls me in closer to him so that our sides lock against each other's. He kisses my forehead and says "It's okay, you're mine now" and I've never felt so safe in my life. I lean my head onto his shoulder and we kinda just sit there for a bit, his arm not moving from holding me. "That's the past Lara Jean, and even though it wasn't the prettiest, it doesn't matter anymore" his words comfort me and I know he's not just saying this to make me feel better. I know he actually means it this time, I can tell by his kisses, how loving they feel how meaningful. "I love you Peter" I say, something I don't say very often, but it was worth telling him today.
When he drives me home later that evening, I just sit in his car for a bit, and he holds my hand in his, never letting go.
