Thank you so much for those who reviewed the last chapter! And here is the next...
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot and characters I have created.
Some Time Later
Last month, Lissa and Christian had gotten married and welcomed their second child into the world. I was happy for them. Angelo, who was now two years old and a half. Owen was about eight months. He was the cutest little boy alive. His green eyes reminded me so much of Adrian. I loved him to death, I loved him and Angelo and Adrian to death. My lovable boys.
Some night, a long time ago, I had written a letter. I was woken up from a horrible dream and I got this sudden desire to just write. And this morning, I was reviewing what I had written. It was a letter to Dimitri, that I'm sure he would never read.
Dear Dimitri,
The world seems different without you. It has been over seven months since I had to kill you, er, since your death. It hurts still, this is like a wound that will take more than a month to heal, possibly years, or maybe never. I am learning how to live without you, or at least trying to learn. I am thankful to God that he let me share wonderful moments with you, although they were so short and left me longing for more. I found Adrian can make me feel better as long as he is here, with me. It was just earlier that I remembered how I used to tease you about how much you loved those Western novels. How I used to say, 'Is that the cowboy way, Comrade?' I still feel your lips on mine as we shared our first kiss when we were under Victor's lust spell, I still feel that sensation of sweetness as your lips met mine. How your hands roamed my body, a touch that caused goose bumps on my flesh. I remember about how you helped me get through life when Mason died or when he was appearing as a ghost. You made my life perfect and you made it seem more bearable. The best memory I have of you, is when you and I got overly passionate in that cabin, the cabin where our first sinful deed was done. How that simple kiss led to another thing, a thing that made me love you even more than I thought I could possibly love. I still feel the way your hands stroked my skin, how it made me feel like I was burning and the only thing that could save me was you. I discovered that Adrian makes me feel that, but with you it was less loving and more inflamed. I still remember when I saw you fight that Strigoi, back when we were rescuing the Strigoi's prisoners. It still kills me when I think of the way your eyes looked at me and conveyed the message of pure love and regret, regret because that would be our last time that we would ever see each other. Who would have known, that some time later, we would have seen each other again? You dead and me, half-alive, struggling to get through this rough life. The thought that hurts me the most to think about, is when you and I shared our final kiss, two months ago, when I had to plunge that stake into your heart. It hurts too much, how I had to kill you and witness everything, from when I staked you to your last breath. I think I've said enough. Where ever you are, don't forget that I will always be your Roza, your wild and beautiful, Roza. And don't forget that you will always be my Dimitri, my badass Russian, Dimitri. Oh, and I just wanted to let you know, that I have an angel watching over me, by which I mean Adrian, and one on the way. Adrian has been the most precious person to me, for his loving actions, I decided to gift him with our first future to be child, who will be named after you, Owen, which is your middle name. I AM so excited!
Love you forever my comrade,
Rose Ivashkov
I hope nobody read it besides Adrian or me. It was something that I wanted to keep private.
"Hey, lovely love. I am home." Adrian said sitting next to me where I sat near the fireplace. "What are you doing, honey?"
"Reading a letter I once wrote," I said, showing it to him. I leaned over to him and kissed him quickly on the lips. "How was work?"
He held on to my lips a little while longer and then answered me. "Slow…It was a slow day." He laid down and placed his head on my lap. "It is good to be back."
"It's great to have you back," I said, leaning down and giving him a quick peck.
"Where are the kids?" He could have said that no sooner. Angelo came running out of the playroom with Owen crawling behind him.
"Daddy!" Angelo said, throwing his arms around Adrian. Owen crawled as fast as he could and reached Adrian as well. Adrian and I had planned that we wouldn't tell Angelo he wasn't our real son. There was something about him that fooled the world that he was our son. Something about him made him look like me, something about him that screamed Rose! when you saw him. Sometimes I wondered if he was my real biological son.
Owen started crawling over everything so that he could take the place where Angelo was. Adrian and I laughed when Owen kicked Angelo out of the way. I patted my lap and told Angelo, "Baby, come here. I will hold you."
He smiled and sat on lap. I hugged him to me and started stroking his hair. "I love you, mommy," he whispered against my chest. Sometimes, I felt like I was being a good mom to him, but other times, I felt that I wasn't a good mom. But what kept me sane was that I was sure as hell of a better mom, than his real mom, who had abandoned him. It took a decent amount of money to find out the truth and that was that his parents were drug and liquor addicts. Poor baby, it was a good thing he ended up with Adrian and I.
I leaned down and whispered in his ear. "I love you, too, sweetheart."
Owen didn't like sharing, that was something we had learned a while ago. He came, mad that someone else was in his mommy's arms, and held out his arms so that I could hold him as well. Adrian laughed. "Do you have room for one more?" He joked. "I wanted to sit on mommy's lap too."
"Oh, go fuck a tiger! Or help me with these kids!"
He laughed again but reached down to take both kids out of my hands. "Rose, no foul language around the our kids."
"Oops, sorry." I stood up and started walking to the kitchen. "Babe, are you hungry?"
"Oh, yes!"
"When aren't you hungry?" I said, going into the kitchen so that I could serve dinner. I grabbed two plates, one bowl, and a bowl smaller than that and filled them with food. I set them on the table, where Adrian, Angelo, and Owen, in his high chair sat.
We finished eating, I cleaned the table and the whole kitchen, Adrian took the kids to sleep in their rooms, and I went to go take a shower. When I got out, Adrian was lying in bed with just his black slacks on, reading the letter I had written. "You are very creative, Rosie." He commented when he noticed me come out of the bathroom.
I shrugged. "It just came to me."
He put the letter aside and patted the spot beside him. I finished putting on my lotion, took my contraceptive pill because I didn't want anymore angels just yet, and joined him on the bed. He unbuttoned his slacks, taking them off while throwing the covers over us both.
"How many kids do you want to have, love?" He asked, turning so that he was facing me. His hand moved down to my leg so that he could throw it over his waist.
"I really don't know, but a girl would sound nice."
He nodded and then smiled. "You want to try and make one now?"
I grimaced. "Oh, no…"
He laughed then became serious. "Rose, there is something…I need to—
"You need to what?" I asked. He stayed quiet for a couple of seconds. Over the last few days, there was something that was bothering him. Something he wanted to tell me, but was hesitant to spill out. "You know you can tell me anything."
He nodded. "I will tell you when I am completely sure." He shifted his weight so he was on top. "Let me focus on you…" His lips on mine stopped me from asking anymore questions.
I wiped some sweat of my face. Why was my nausea so thick? It wasn't really that hot inside the room. Maybe I needed some fresh air.
I slipped on my robe and slippers and started walking to the den, where there was a balcony. The cool, fresh air of Alaska hit me. All I had in this moment was simple relaxation and peace. Goose bumps started forming, not because it was cold, but because of the great pleasure the wind was making me feel.
I didn't notice someone standing next to me until his cold hand touched my shoulder. "Rose, is that you?"
His voice could have been no more familiar. I had to squint a little to make out his features. And to prove that he really was here, standing in front of me. I saw the wind ruffle his brown hair and long duster. Yes, that was really him.
My mouth fell open. "What the hell…Dimitri?"
