author's note: And now we have chapter 4! Yeah this is definitely working out better than what I was doing before. Anyway, not much to say so I'll just let you get to reading the chapter. Hope you enjoy and don't be afraid to let me know what you think! Look out for chapter 5 next week!
disclaimer: I don't own Stargate SG-1, Stargate Atlantis, or Somewhere I Belong.
Somewhere I Belong
Chapter 4
Erase all the Pain Till It's Gone
And I let it all out to find
That I'm not the only person with these things in mind
A week had passed since John had started at the SGC and everything was still going good. A couple nights ago, Daniel, Colonel Carter and Teal'c had shown up at his apartment for what they called a 'team night.' They had watched a couple movies and just generally hung out. It was an interesting experience for John and certainly not something he had been expecting. None of it was.
After the team night, John thought that maybe everyone was right, because he really did feel like he fit in with SG-1. Teal'c rarely said anything, but John was learning that he conveyed most of what he thought through head tilts and raised eyebrows. He had yet to figure out what they all meant, but he was certain that with time he would be able to figure it all out.
John often found it hard to actually connect with his superior officers, but Colonel Carter was different. She was easy to get along with and she even seemed like she might be laid back enough to deal with John's insubordinate attitude. He had been a little nervous during the team night, not knowing how to act around her, because she was after all his boss. But he quickly found that she had an easy going personality and even liked to joke around with her friends. It was a refreshing change to find in a superior officer.
But John had found that Daniel was the one he got along with best. He didn't really know why, although they had found out pretty quickly that they had a lot in common. They had actually found that out on John's tour of the SGC. After the tour they had returned to Daniel's office and just talked for a while before heading to lunch with the others. It was during that talk that they discovered that they had the same favorite flavor of ice cream, favorite pie and even favorite pizza. The most surprising had been when they found out that they'd been born on the same day. It was a little weird. John, though, since then had been spending most of his time hanging out in Daniel's office because they got along so well. That just happened to be where he was headed now.
When John entered the office General O'Neill was there. He was getting pretty used to the General being around. Then again he had been the leader of SG-1 for seven years and they were all still friends. And just like with SG-1, John found it pretty easy to get along with O'Neill. You heard the word 'General' and automatically assumed they were some stiff desk jockey, but O'Neill was the complete opposite. And just like everything else, John found that a little on the weird side as well.
Neither Daniel nor O'Neill noticed his entrance, of course, that was probably because they were too busy bickering about something. It seemed that these sorts of things were a common occurrence, but John didn't really mind because he found their arguments to be highly entertaining. Only a couple minutes later and it was over. O'Neill left grumbling something under his breath about annoying know-it-all archeologists and Daniel was grinning.
"I take it you won that one," John commented.
"Are you kidding, I always win," Daniel replied still grinning.
"Sure you do," John said.
"Okay, so most of the time."
"So, what was it about this time?" John asked as he sat down in the chair across from Daniel.
"Oh, the usual," Daniel said.
"The usual about General O'Neill coming down here to escape his paperwork or the usual about him trying to escape from boring meetings?" John asked with a grin of his own.
"Both this time," Daniel said.
John picked up a book and started flipping through the pages, but he wasn't seeing the words. Not that he'd actually be able to understand anything anyway. But even if he could understand the words his mind was completely focused on something else.
When he'd gotten home yesterday he'd flopped onto the couch with his mail and flipped through it. Most of it was junk, there were a couple bills (he'd only moved to Colorado a week ago and he was already getting bills), and an envelope from one of his old Social Workers. He'd just sat there and stared at the envelope. There was a voice in the back of his head telling him that he should just open it and get it over with, but he just couldn't do it.
He'd tried his best to forget about it, but nothing worked. He'd lain awake half the night thinking about it. As it was he had the letter tucked into the pocket of his BDU jacket. He hadn't been able to leave it at home for some reason. But now he had no idea what to do with it. His first instinct was to find someone to talk to about it, but he wasn't sure who to talk to.
He thought about maybe talking to Colonel Carter, but even though they'd made some inroads toward possibly becoming friends, she was still his commanding officer. That just made going to her about something like this, something that was such a personal matter a little weird in his book.
Then he thought, maybe Teal'c. He was a good listener and was very wise, but then John thought about the way that Teal'c would stare at you without moving or saying anything. It was still a little unnerving. That and Teal'c was an alien, and even though he'd been on Earth for a while now there was no telling if he knew how certain things worked. So that ruled Teal'c out.
Daniel, of course, should have been the obvious choice. After all, they got along well and John felt pretty comfortable talking to him about pretty much anything. But he just wasn't sure about this. There were just some things that you can't really understand unless you have experienced them yourself. And growing up in foster care just happened to be one of those things.
"What's up?" Daniel asked suddenly snapping John out of his thoughts.
"Huh?"
"You look like you have something on your mind."
"Oh, it's nothing," John said setting the book back down on the table.
"If it was nothing you wouldn't be so distracted."
"Oh, you noticed that," John said. He'd been really hoping that no one would notice that he was a little out of it. So much for that, though.
"Yeah I noticed," Daniel replied.
John didn't say anything back. He didn't really know what to say.
Daniel frowned slightly before leaning forward. "John, you do know that you can talk to me about anything, right?"
"Yeah, I know," John said. "I'm just not sure you would understand. I'm not sure if anyone would."
"Well, there's no way to know unless you talk to me."
John sighed. "Have you read my file?"
"No, I generally like to get to know someone by talking to them," Daniel replied.
"So, you don't know what's in it?"
"I only know what Jack told me and that was pretty much all about your military background."
John only nodded. Now he didn't really know if he should say anything. Although, chances were that he wouldn't have a choice now. Daniel was like a dog with a bone sometimes. Once he got going on something he wouldn't let it go until he'd gotten to the heart of the matter. That was something that John had learned very quickly.
"John, what's this all about?" Daniel asked after a little while.
John sighed and then decided what the heck. So he pulled the envelope out and just held it.
"I got this in the mail yesterday," he said slowly.
"What is it?"
"I don't know I haven't actually opened it yet."
"And the reason you haven't opened it-," Daniel prompted.
John hesitated, but only briefly. "It's from one of my Social Workers."
"Oh." That was all Daniel said, but John heard the understanding in his tone. John's mind, though, told him that no one could truly understand. But he forced that thought away.
"The obvious guess is that is has something to do with one of my foster families," John said after a moment. "I just don't know which one."
"You won't know unless you open it," Daniel said.
"I know," John replied. "Now you see why I didn't think anyone could understand." And if John was being honest with himself he still didn't quite believe that Daniel really understood.
"I do," Daniel said quietly after a moment, so quietly in fact that John almost didn't hear it. "And you're right, not many people would understand how feels to have grown up in the foster care system."
"I didn't know that you-," John trailed off not entirely sure how to finish that sentence.
"I guess that's just another thing we have in common," Daniel replied.
John sat there for a moment just thinking. He kept getting surprised. First, with the job offer itself and then with his team. They had accepted him into their little group without batting an eyelash. They even welcomed him. And now he even felt comfortable enough to think of them as friends. But now finding out that Daniel had grown up in foster care, it was just rather strange.
"Did you know your parents?" John asked after a few minutes. It was the one thing that had always bothered him and he just couldn't help but ask.
Daniel leaned back in his chair and just stared for a minute. "No, I didn't," he finally said.
"I never knew mine either," John stated flipping the envelope over and over in his hands.
"That was one thing I never understood," Daniel said sounding slightly irritated. "Apparently I was just dropped off at an orphanage when I was three, but no one knew who had taken me there. I don't think they even saw who did it. They just found me there. And they just assumed that my name was my name because it was written on the collar of my jacket. They never had any records. It was all rather weird."
John's jaw dropped. There was no way. "Holy crap," he muttered.
"Tell me about it," Daniel said.
"No, I mean it was the same for me."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean it was the exact same for me," John said sitting forward. "I was dropped off when I was three; my name was on the collar of my jacket. I never knew my parents or how I got there."
"That's . . . weird," Daniel commented.
"Yeah," John agreed.
They both just sat there for a moment letting everything sink in.
"We really do have a lot in common," Daniel said.
John nodded. Then he sucked in a breath and before he lost his nerve he ripped the envelope open and pulled the letter out. It took a couple minutes for him to read it and after he was done he just sat there. This was another thing he hadn't been expecting. Daniel gently plucked the letter from John's hands and read it. John thought that maybe he should feel a little angry about that, but he really didn't.
"I take it Mrs. Murphy was important to you?" Daniel asked.
"Yeah, she was my foster mother when I was six," John replied. "She was going to adopt me."
"What happened?"
"I'm not sure," John said shrugging. "One day she was halfway through the paper work and then the next she was deemed unworthy to be a foster parent and I was moved to another home."
"That's a little odd," Daniel stated.
"Yeah I guess," John said.
"Are you going to go to the funeral?" Daniel asked.
"I probably should," John said. "It's the least I can do."
"I could go with you if you want."
John looked up at Daniel. "You would do that?"
"You're not alone anymore, John."
John smiled gratefully at Daniel. Maybe he had been worried about all of this for nothing. Maybe everyone else had been right. Maybe he really did fit in here. And maybe, just maybe Daniel was right and he wasn't alone anymore. Only time would tell, though, so he would just have to wait and see.
