Chapter 4

Pete fell asleep, his head resting on the edge of the bed, but he never let go of Julie's hand. All night long that movie projector continued playing in his head, reliving the last five years. He saw himself grabbing Linc and Julie after the Magic Bus incident, so happy to see them, and remembered that in the back of his mind how good Julie had felt in the crook of his arm. He remembered in their early days how he had hurt her with his words and the look on her face, and how a simple 'sorry' had brought back that delightful smile. He remembered the time in the helicopter when she was supposed to be Micky Moore and he couldn't rouse her; that had scared him. But when she did finally open her eyes and looked straight at him, she didn't seem to recognize him, and that had hurt him. He had felt by that point that their feelings for each other were growing stronger, but to see her rush into Ray's arms, that had hurt. After she had spoken with Ray at the hospital, he acknowledged that Ray had lost Micky twice, and had to keep his voice steady when he told her they had almost lost her. He shuddered to think of what his life might have been like had they arrived just a couple minutes later. But most of all he remembered the looks, the smiles, the laughs, the touches - they'd always had an effect on him but they were usually in the midst of doing something so he never took the time to really think about it - or do anything about it, but if he were honest with himself, he'd have to admit that as time went on his feelings for her only got stronger. Now it was giving him a nice dream and a restless night all rolled up into one - which was Julie herself.

Throughout the night, the machines kept beeping and the hospital personnel came and went, and Pete would wake, check to see that Julie was still with them, and eventually fall back asleep. The Captain and Linc arrived bright and early the next morning, finding both patient and visitor sleeping.

"Pete," Captain Greer called. "Pete," he said again to finally rouse him.

Pete looked up and ran a hand over his face as if to gain his bearings, trying to remember where he was and why, and to rouse him from his sleep.

"What time is it?" he asked in a groggy voice?

"7" Linc told him

"Any change?" The Captain inquired

Pete just shook his head.

"Well they said they didn't expect her to wake til late today as they're keeping her sedated. Tell you what, Pete, you look terrible. If I can't talk you into going home for a while, at least let Linc take you to the cafeteria and buy you coffee and breakfast."

Linc looked over at the Captain and the services he had just offered on his behalf. "You buying, Captain?"

"Yeah, I can."

"Just kidding. I think that sounds like a great idea. How bout it Pete?"

With a quick glance at the unchanging Julie, Pete agreed to at least a cup of coffee. He hadn't decided on breakfast yet. Slowly he rose from the uncomfortable chair/makeshift bed and stretched. He was stiff in places he didn't know existed, but he followed Linc out the door, feeling uneasy about doing so.

His nerves didn't settle down in the cafeteria, but the hot coffee did awaken him more. He said very little, just kept staring at the ring on his right finger.

"Hey man! What's eating you? The doctor said she's going to be ok."

"I'll feel better when she's up and awake and looks the part."

"Now you know they're keeping her under so she doesn't reopen that artery. Otherwise she'd already be awake and chatting away."

That made Pete smile. Sometimes he prayed that she'd quit chatting; now, he prayed that she'd start.

"C'mon man, it's more than just that. What else is bugging you?"

Pete took a long, hard swallow of coffee and sighed before attempting to answer Linc's question.

"You remember when you got shot?" Linc nodded. "Well, I walked around in a daze for a while. See, I'd always thought that nothing could happen to us as long as we were together. Found out how wrong I was."

"What's this got to do with what happened to Julie?" Linc asked, not quite sure he was following.

"Well, just like I had that preconceived notion wrong, I somehow never thought Julie could get hurt, I mean really hurt, because we would always be there to protect her - and we were there and she still got hurt. Just makes you realize that this job isn't a game and we're all vulnerable."

"No, the job isn't a game, but for the most part, we've had each other's backs."

"Until something serious happens. What if...what if next time we're not so lucky? I mean, is it all worth it?"

"Only you can answer that for yourself, Pete," Linc replied leaving a break in the conversation. "Man, you look terrible. Why don't you go home for a little bit and get some real rest. The Captain and I will be here and we'll call you if there's any change."

Pete thought about it. The offer was temping. A hot shower, clean clothes, and a few hours of real sleep were hard to resist, but in the long run he just shook his head and said he was fine. "I'll wash up in the restroom, and grab some z's in the chair."

Linc and Pete returned to Julie's room, and the Captain and Linc shared a brief glance that obviously said everything since Pete was still with them. Julie's condition hadn't changed. From the looks of things, it appeared that the Captain had been filling Julie in on what a fine job they had done on this last case and that they were rounding up drug dealers from here to Colorado. Julie slept on.

The rest of the day, the three men talked, to each other, to Julie, and even to themselves at times. They twisted in their chairs. Got up for breaks. Went down to the cafeteria for meals. Got up and stretched. And as evening approached, when they expected Julie to wake, she slept on, moving not an inch.

As it got later, the guys got more restless, wondering why she wasn't waking as they had expected. They began questioning nurses and the doctor that came into check on her, but they had no valid reason - they just said everyone had their own time table and with that much blood loss, it wasn't terribly alarming. But to three men in Room 608 it was. As visiting hours were over, Captain Greer announced that he wasn't as young as he used to be, and that he was exhausted from just sitting all day. As much as he wanted to stay, he simply couldn't. So he bid them good night and ordered them to call if anything changed. Linc, on the other hand, offered to stay, and let Pete go home, but he refused, so they decided to stay together.

A couple hours later, Linc stood up and stretched. He announced he was going to the cafeteria for coffee and asked Pete if he wanted him to bring him back one. Pete shook his head in the affirmative and thanked his friend.

After Linc left, Pete too stood up and stretched. He walked around the room gazing at the monitors that never seemed to change. Eventually he found himself at the head of the bed looking down at its occupant who should have woke by then. Before he knew it, he was learning over the bead, his face merely a few inches from hers. "Wake up, Julie. We miss you. I miss you," he whispered, and with that he bent down even further until his lips were gently touching hers.